Following the confrontation with Yoongi about his avoidance of the elder and Yoongi directly confessing to him after that, Jimin dragged himself home, laid on his bed and cried.

His life was a mess. Torn between being the model son for his parents, having to reject the love of his life, concealing his identity, getting put down and insulted for being studious and just different . He’s sick of living like that. His whole life’s basically a lie; he’s lying to his parents, lying to Yoongi and most importantly, lying to himself.

Jimin’s conflicted - he wants to let Yoongi know who he really is but he’s scared so he continues the facade. He wants so badly to run into Yoongi’s arms, tell him yes, he would love to be his boyfriend and go on dates with him. He wants to hold his hand, snuggle with him, share chaste kisses in between writing songs and just live contently without having to worry about expectations, grades, about what people thought of him.

Well, the dislike for him from his fellow schoolmates aren’t unfounded, he thinks. He’s a coward, boring, a weak bundle of insecurity and he certainly doesn’t deserve someone like Yoongi who's self-assured, passionate and seemed to have his whole life figured out; the total opposite of Jimin.

He knows, and agrees. Yoongi is better off without the mess of a person he is. The elder was made for bigger and better things. Jimin would just drag him down.

How Yoongi could love him if he couldn’t even love himself?

Jimin had been avoiding him even more after his confession, opting to leave his texts on seen, and it hurt Yoongi a lot but the boy’s lukewarm answer had puzzled him even more. According to the younger male, he liked Yoongi too so why can’t they be together? He said he'll give the boy some space so he did and he hoped Jimin would get over his slump soon because Yoongi's not about to give up so easily. Jimin was like a breath of fresh air to him and he wants the younger in his arms so bad. Unwittingly, Jimin had become just as important to him as his music, and that says a lot.

Getting held back in detention for skipping class(again), Yoongi balanced a pencil on his lip as he racked his brains over what to do. Finally, the bell rings, signally the end of this god forsaken class (it was honestly just a waste of time), and all but dashes out of class after stuffing his notes into his bag. He has a mind to find Namjoon and Hoseok for advice when he hears the sound of a piano. Curious, he follows it to the school’s music room.

As he drew closer, he could make out the song. It was one he didn’t recognise at all(and having studied the instrument for a better part of his life, he knew a lot of songs so this was a rare occurrence). An original composition?

Hardly anyone ever uses the piano there apart from him and he certainly didn’t know anyone else who would bother to stay behind to play the piano either, much less a song that’s not a random key banging monstrosity or, god forbid, Chopsticks .

He speeds up his steps, wondering who in this school could create such a piece, and he really wants to find out because this person is undoubtedly talented if it really were self-composed.

The melody was heavy, unsettling and sombre but it was beautiful. 
 

Jimin was feeling overwhelmed. A plethora of emotions swam within him, most of them negative.

He was on his way home after the routine teasing and insults thrown his way when he walked past the music room and halted. He was having a bad day. Someone had taken it upon himself to tear a few pages off his textbook and draw ugly caricatures of him on his notes. He’d have to redo them and borrow Taehyung’s textbook to copy the missing pages; it was too costly to simply get another brand new one, the same thing will probably happen again anyway. Jimin’s so tired with his life.

He hasn’t been to Yoongi’s place since that day and he really needed an outlet. He felt like he was submerged in quicksand, swamped with hatred for himself and his life at the moment that he almost couldn’t contain it. The last thing he wants is to breakdown in front of his parents so he decides to stay back for a little while, when everyone has left, to use the piano in the music room. The soothing sound of the instrument always calmed him. Music calmed him. It was the only thing he had going for him now. The only thing that wouldn’t judge him, wouldn’t bury him in more worries, wouldn’t insult him and wouldn’t hold any expectations of him. It was just an inanimate object but one that he’d been so grateful for. He recalled the lyrics to First Love, the song Yoongi performed a while ago on stage and he chuckled, the relatable lines of the song filling him with melancholy.

He lifts the cover of the black upright piano in the corner of the room, removing the dust cloth and running his stubby fingers over the ivory keys before pulling out the bench and sitting down.

He takes a deep breath and exhales before lifting his hand, lightly resting on the keys in the standard position, and he begins to play.

It’s a sad melody but Jimin can feel the tension in his shoulders fade away as he continues the song he’d been writing. The song he’d poured everything into with the hopes of reaching out to something, someone, when he couldn’t do it himself with his words.

And he starts to sing the lyrics he knows so well because it’s a part of him - his feelings and emotions put into a flow of soothing notes. His deft fingers flying over the keys in a beautiful rhythm as he lets it all out.

Naege malhae

Neoui dalkomhan misoro naege

Naege malhae

Soksagideut nae gwisgae malhae

Don’t be like a prey

Be smooth like a like a snake

Beoseonago sipeunde 
 

He closes his eyes and lets the music fill him and take over; lets himself finally breathe as he forgets everything else for awhile; let the melody and the rawness consume him.

Yoongi finds the door ajar, the soothing notes spilling out from the crack. He sneaks a peek inside the occupied music room, and, at first, doesn’t recognise the figure by the piano with his back to him but once the person began to sing, Yoongi stopped breathing.

Jimin?

The owner of this voice is undoubtedly Jimin.

He would never mistake this voice. The voice that sang for him and his song; the voice that lulled him to sleep on regular days; the sweet sound of the boy he had feelings for.

He doesn’t know the song though. Did Jimin write this? Why is Jimin here? 
 

Then he notices the uniform. 
 

Jimin went to this school too...

Yoongi stays by the doorway, half hidden as he takes in the melody and the lyrics of the song. The voice he loved to hear was strained with a lingering sadness and melancholy that Yoongi had the urge to wipe it all away.  Gradually, Jimin’s song comes to a stop and Yoongi quickly hides. He hears a shaky sigh coming from inside the room and if it weren’t so deathly quiet, he would have missed Jimin’s broken whisper: “I’m so sorry, Yoongi.”

The little sniffle after makes Yoongi’s heart hurt.

He has half a mind to just walk in there to confront Jimin, and then comfort him, but he holds himself back. Jimin was clearly keeping his identity from Yoongi. If Jimin doesn’t want him to know then Yoongi will pretend not to. Jimin had promised to tell him when he’s ready so he’ll wait for Jimin to tell him himself. He'll wait for Jimin. 
 

He quietly walks away before the younger could spot him.

Ever since that chance encounter, Yoongi had been paying more attention to the bespectacled boy. He wonders why he had never noticed all the times they bumped into each other. Granted, they didn’t know each other well then and Jimin looked really different with his long bangs and thick glasses, it was still Jimin. Yoongi was berating himself for not realising the two were the same person.

No wonder Jimin didn’t want to tell him anything about his school.

Yoongi knew he had a reputation, he knew the rumors surrounding him(he apparently had joined a gang, tattooed his whole back and changed girls like clothes) and the displeasure he causes the teachers when he skips classes and ignores them (he’s usually too engrossed in his writing to notice their questions) don’t make their impression of him any better. He couldn’t blame the younger for wanting to stay away from him during school hours at least. He was a little(a lot) hurt though.

He couldn’t think of any other reason for the younger to conceal his identity. Yoongi was a known troublemaker in school and it won’t bode well for one of the top rankers to be seen hanging out with him. Moreover, his parents were teachers. Jimin already seemed to have a lot on his plate and adding in the resident 'bad boy', plus his over-zealous fan club to the mix was probably a bad idea.

He understands… but he can’t stop the pang of sadness that hits him.

It was hard distancing himself from the one person who made him feel at ease and at home. Jimin finds himself stealing glances at the elder whenever he’s near as if he had a radar attached that could only sense Yoongi; all he could see was the blonde-haired senior.

If Taehyung and Jungkook catch him staring they don’t mention it. They've had this conversation before - about Jimin being paranoid and putting himself down when he’s actually nothing like that; it had ended in a horrible fight with Jimin breaking down - one they never wanted to repeat. Being friends, they knew of Jimin’s difficulties with his home environment and with himself, and hence, tried to stay near him as best as they could while fending off the bullies. They had different classes occasionally but other times, the trio would be inseparable. Nonetheless, Taehyung and Jungkook could only helplessly watch as their friend continued to wallow in his own self-pity.

Every fleeting glance made Jimin’s chest ache unbearably. So close yet so far. Memories of what they had had floated to the surface every time Jimin spotted the elder sitting by the tree in the courtyard with his notebook of lyrics - lyrics he always shared with Jimin when it was just two of them in Yoongi’s room. The intimacy and understanding they had between them that used to comfort Jimin now caused his heart to constrict and tears to form behind his closed lids when he blinked.

Yet he couldn’t look away. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from the elder who had shown him joy, solace, and shared his passion in doing the things they loved. The elder he loved, who had said he loved him back.

It’s too late now. Jimin wasn’t worthy. Heck, he never was to begin with.

And as if the universe didn't already make it obvious, he was once again reminded of it.

He opened his locker a few days later to find his textbooks ripped to shreds. Again. Jimin could only look at the scene pensively, having been subjected to such bullying before. In fact, it had never really stopped. He was going to have to borrow Taehyung’s book this time.

He heard a giggle and turned, only to spot a group of girls with hands covering their mouths, looking his way. They didn’t even care that Jimin had seen them. By the glint in their eyes and the way they're looking amused at his plight, he’s quite positive they’re behind this.

Unbeknownst to the situation, Taehyung strides cheerily through the walkway with a loud “Good morning, Chim!” Only for his face to fall when he takes in the state of Jimin’s locker.

“, why do they keep doing this to you. Don’t they have better things to do than to pick on others. s!” Jimin smiles, though it doesn’t reach his eyes, and pats Taehyung on the shoulder, thanking him for his concern. It was enough to know he had people on his side who supported him wholeheartedly.

“It’s okay, Tae. I’m used to this. Could I borrow your textbook? I’ll return it to you after first period.”

“You shouldn’t be used to this though,” Taehyung frowns as he hands over the book in question.

Jimin could only give a wry smile in return.

Over the next few days, Jimin often finds his things missing, ripped, dirtied, soaked and littered with words like ‘Die!’, ‘Homo’, ‘’, ‘Don’t look at him with your disgusting eyes’. He’ll be lying if he said it didn’t affect him even a little. In fact, it hurt a lot. It’s getting harder and harder to ignore it as more of his school materials get damaged. The notes he painstakingly made were all ruined by these people who find enjoyment in his misery, calling him names and breaking his heart further. He knows he’s not enough for Yoongi and these people who don’t know anything are just rubbing it in. It hurts. He’s tired and he just wants all the bothersome, negative feelings to end.

Why do they like to bully and make others’ lives difficult? Jimin will never understand. He could never imagine himself wishing this upon anybody, not even the assailants.

Was it wrong of him to want to be left alone?

Was it wrong of him to fall in love with someone unattainable?

Was it wrong of him to want to do what he wants without people telling him he can’t?

Why is it wrong?

What did he do to deserve all this?

Why?

“What do you think you’re doing?” The girls in front of him startled, turning their heads to face the senior, blushing.

Yoongi recognised some of them as his fans and his face fell. He was taking a short break from a particularly grueling period of gym when he spotted a bunch of girls sneaking into the boys’ changing room. Curious at what they could be up to, he follows, only to see them take something out from one of the changing room lockers while whispering among themselves.

“N-Nothing, oppa… We were just leaving...” One of them stuttered out, hands moving to hide whatever it was they took behind her back. Yoongi eyed them suspiciously as the group carefully made their way past him before something caught his eye.

His piercing gaze shifts down to where the girl’s hands were kept behind her back as she tries to move the object out of his sight and he vaguely spots a familiar notebook. It was encased in black leather with a string binding and the initials “J.P.” engraved on the spine - a customised one he had given to Jimin when the younger asked about writing his own lyrics. A warm feeling started to spread in Yoongi’s chest as he realised the younger had kept it with him still.

It faded quickly into disdain, however, when he registered the fact that said book was in the hands of these girls.

“That notebook,” Yoongi said sternly, causing the girls to jump. “Give it back.”

“B-But, oppa… It’s mine and-”

“Don’t play games with me. Put it back in his locker.” Yoongi fixes them with a scornful glare, making the girls’ breaths hitch as they mutter something undecipherable, choosing to drop the book at his feet instead before scampering off in fear.

Yoongi sighed and shook his head. ing es.

Making a mental note to be more observant, he bends to pick it up, dusting it off prior to placing the leather notebook back where it belongs. It seemed that his fans were up to no good and he doesn’t have a single clue why Jimin, sweet, lovable Jimin, is taking the brunt of it but he’d be damned if he let them go any further.

He just hoped Jimin would be ok.

I'm not trying to romanticise bullying.
Bullying is a horrible thing and should be stopped.
Nobody deserves the hurt, especially people who are just trying to live their lives.
#EndViolence