chapter 2  

"I have a lot of what you might call creative self-loathing - I have pretty high expectations, and they seem to consistently be higher than what I'm able to accomplish."

-Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu

       

JaeHee's POV

 

"Only 49 out of 50? Do you know how low that is? How could you be so careless? I thought I raised you better than that!"

"But I was the highest in class... and it is just one mark—"

"Just one mark? Do you know how important one mark is? One mark can cause you to fall behind those in the elite schools. You better buck up if not I will deport you back here, do you understand?"

"Yes, Mum."

Laying on the bed, I could not help but recalled the conversation I had with my mother. It had been almost 4 months ever since I moved into a new apartment, away from her. Instead of a call asking how I had been, how I had been eating and how was my social life, she called just because she heard about my newly attained grades.

My parents had divorced since I was barely in middle school, allowing my mum to hold complete custody over me. But instead of showering me with love like most parents do, she kept drilling me through tuition classes, enrichment class and Olympiads. I did not have a chance to have fun in my childhood like most kids, being able to do stupid s and laugh it over. Instead of real human friends, books were mine instead.

I knew that it is not easy being a single parent. having to raise a kid while supporting herself. Therefore in my childhood. my mum seldom make her appearance, leaving me under the care of my domestic helper instead. For all of my life, my mother had really high expectation of me. She expected me to be the best in everything I do.

But it hurt