June 16, 2013

I looked at the man sitting across from me. Just two months ago he was a complete stranger walking into the place I worked to order a cup of black coffee. Just two months ago, this pink-haired stranger showed me a little more to life than I seeked it out to be. In two months of knowing Kang Euigeon, Kang Daniel, he's changed my life so much. He's made me so much happier than I've been in years. 

Mom, dad.. I think what's been holding me back on trying to find someone to love was the fear of losing them, the way I lost the both of you in mere seconds. I think what held me back for so long was being scared of watching them walk out of my life. I miss you guys... But, I don't want to be held back anymore. I don't want to be afraid anymore. I want to learn to love the way you both loved me, loved each other. I want to love someone again. Someone alive.

"Yes." 

Who knew just one word could make a man so happy.

"I'm... happy. With you." Daniel smiled. That one smile that stole my heart. The one smile that could cure a broken heart in a second. It broke me.

It wasn't until after we ate dinner that we went to the park, the same park he took me two months ago. We looked at stars all night. We talked on and on about our goals and what college will be like when we're finally together, living together. Daniel laughed a laugh so heartwarming it was etched onto me. He held my hand close to his chest. I could almost feel the pounding of that kind and loving heart of his. He kept holding my hand, and soon after he fell asleep. I stared at his sleeping face; the mole beneath his right eye and on his chin, the way the left side of his lips curved up a little more than his right. You see every flaw in a person when you're this close to them. But in that moment, on this night, he was brighter than the stars could ever shine.

The next morning, we both woke up to the sound of birds chirping. We both had fallen asleep in the middle of the park. Thankfully, the neighborhood didn't have many cops going around in the middle of the night. 

"Good morning," Daniel looked at me with waking eyes, "Did you know your small head is pretty heavy?" 

"Shut up!" I slapped his side, face turning red from embarrassment. He laughed while clutching the area I slapped.

"It's only 5 in the morning, and you're already slapping me? Oh, it's going to be a long day." he teased.

"Have you always been this annoying, Daniel-ssi?" I barked back.

"Ah, if you haven't already noticed, yes, mister Ong-ssi." Daniel continued, using his Busan accent to mess with me. I smirked at his remark. 

"Then why don't you-" Daniel pecked my lips, making me go quiet. I looked at him in surprise, backing away from him a bit. He smiled, biting his lip slightly. He just kept staring at me, looking for some type of reaction. I couldn't say anything, and I don't know if it was a good or a bad thing. Daniel's eyes softened. 

"Don't be surprised.." he said. He grabbed the side of my face, and I was completely frozen. He slowly came in closer as my heartbeat fastened; anticipating, nervous, or scared, I wasn't sure. Daniel didn't hesitate one bit as he pressed his lips against mine, softly and gently. Our eyes closed as we sat there in the middle of the park at 5 in the morning, birds chirping, the sun slowly rising from the horizon. 

He slowly backed away, opening his eyes. I opened my own eyes, looking back at him. My lips were pressed together and formed a small smile. 

"I really... really like you, Ong Seongwoo." Daniel puffed out. He grasped my hand and held it like a child, playing with my fingers. 

"Did you know.. your morning breath is pretty bad." I smiled cheekily.

"Yah," Daniel laughed and put his arm around my neck, pulling me closer to his chest, "I know." 

"Lets go home." I poked his stomach. 

We both stood up from off the grass. Daniel grabbed my hand again, holding it tightly. I felt secured, something I've lacked for the past couple of years. I felt happy, content, and proud to have this man by my side. Life couldn't have been greater.

"I know it's hard for you to say anything, but I want to be with you for a long time. I'm happy, and I'll remind you everyday how happy I am to be yours and for you to be mine." I could see Daniel smiling as he said that, but I couldn't meet his eyes. 

"I don't need you to say anything. I know you like the back of my hand. I trust you." 

We walked the rest of the way home in silence. It wasn't an awkward silence, but it was a comforting silence where you know everything in the world is going to be okay. It was the silence that engulfed us in a moment of pure happiness. 

August 7, 2013

Daniel and I spent the summer busying our lives with nothing but each other. Although I was working and he was focused on his studies, we always made time for each other. Living together has made our relationship stronger. I was learning more and more about him everyday. 

Daniel was an organized person, mentally. Physically, our room was a complete mess because of him. 

"Daniel-ah! Have you seen my apron?" I was shouting from upstairs in our room. I always kept my apron hung up behind the door after work. It was almost 7:50am, and I had to get to the coffee shop in 10 minutes with no time to spare. 

"Nooooooo," he sang from the living room. I walked over the pile of clothes that was unable to attend itself. 

"Yah, you haven't even done the laundry, and I haven't either. Where could it have gone?" I walked down the stairs frustrated. 

"I don't know." Daniel kept his repsonse simple. 

"Don't tell me," I tilted my head, staring at the 18 year old who was oddly eating ice cream for breakfast, "Did you use it as a towel again!?" 

"NOOO!" he popped up from his seat still holding the container of ice cream. I walked over to the small laundry room to see if my apron was anywhere to be found. 

"Nonono, don't go over there!!" Daniel raced ahead of me, closing the door behind him. 

"YAH! Stop using my apron as your towel! And you left a freakin' trail of ice cream!!"  I shouted. 

"I didn't mean to! We didn't have any towels so I just grabbed whatev