He was gone and I thought I would never be able to breath again but I did and even though I did my heart still felt like crashing in my chest every once and a while, I couldn't breath properly and tears still form in my eyes and I still hear a whisper reminding me of him and telling me that I will never really get over it, and it suffocates me, the memories of him suffocates me. I'm trapped in every memory we have had and every single little detail of how it was like and I'm so sick of it, I'm so sick of feeling like my heart is going to explode, I need it to stop now, I need him to stop this now. 

-10 months later it still hurts.