originally posted June 6th, 2017

edited April 16th, 2020

Seungkwan looked over at his best friend sitting in the desk to the left his own. He was ignoring the teacher’s current lecture on some type of equation and how to apply it to questions and such at the front of the room. He'd been friends with Vernon since they had met middle school. When Vernon had still been shorter than him and when Seungkwan was still chubby and significantly more awkward. His middle school days hadn’t exactly been the most fun of times. He’d only talked to the girls in his class. Every male that approached him in middle school wasn’t looking for friendship. They were looking to use him, to get closer to his sister, Jinsul and when they found that didn’t work they quickly resorted to bullying. He’d lost count of all the days he’d come home, bruises littering his body.

Jinsul was a year younger than him and attended both the same middle and high school and Seungkwan. Even though she was the younger sibling Seungkwan lived in her and his older sister’s shadow. His older sister, Sojeong, was smart and talented and most of all, popular. His younger, Jinsul, was kind, beautiful, and, yet again, popular. Then there was Seungkwan who wasn’t particularly good at anything, his grades average, and any popularity he had ever gained was from people trying to get closer to his two sisters, which was quickly destroyed as they learned that had no effect.

Then in his last year of middle school, he’d met Vernon, sweet Vernon. He’d heard of him from the girls he was friends with, they’d swooned over his looks for years, but it wasn’t until he came eye to eye with him on the first day that he realized how right they were. They’d become friends almost instantly and it soon became apparent to Seungkwan that even though Vernon was attractive, he was also a massive dork. He had always been silent in his classes, giving the other classmates the impression of a cold, chic. bad boy, but in reality, Vernon was simply the quiet type. When he was with Seungkwan, however, he could ramble on for an hour straight about almost nothing and Seungkwan was more than happy to listen. And with this friendship, Seungkwan finally found someone who was willing to stand up for him. Having Vernon, the “bad boy” as his best friend made it where no one could say anything to him and he was eternally grateful.

It was practically impossible for Seungkwan not to fall in love with him. He was handsome and each year that past he got taller, but it wasn’t just about that. His looks weren’t what made Seungkwan fall in love with him. No, it was more than that he was funny and kind and his presence made Seungkwan feel safe. Somewhere along in the five years they had been friends Seungkwan found a second home in Vernon. He’d taken up space in Seungkwan’s heart and the smaller wasn’t sure he ever wanted him to leave. 

As Seungkwan stared at him, he wondered if it would ever be possible for him to fall out of love with him, he didn’t think it was or at least he, hoped it wasn’t. Seungkwan reached out and poked Vernon on his side, hoping he would turn his attention away from the teacher and onto him, where it should be. There was no reaction. He poked him again and was confronted with the same response.

“Vernon,” Seungkwan whispered, nothing.

“Vernonie,” still no response.

“Vernon oppa,” Seungkwan whined quietly. He could see Vernon tense in his seat before he turned to make eye contact with him.

“What?” he whispered harshly.

“Pay attention to me,” he whined. Vernon sighed shaking his head and turning back towards the teacher.

“Vernon,” Seungkwan whined again.

“Seungkwan,” Vernon replied, finally turning towards him,  “There are three minutes till lunch I will give you all the attention you want then, I promise.” Seungkwan smiled to himself

_____

“Vernonie,” Seungkwan whined taking his left hand, “It’s lunch, pay attention to me.”

“You know, Boo, if I fail math, it’s all your fault.” he joked

Seungkwan frowned, “I’d never let you fail, we can just study when you come over today.”

“You know,” Seungcheol spoke up from across the table, “I’ve been wondering this for a while, is there any day where Vernon doesn’t go over to your house?”

Seungkwan scoffed, “Of course.”

“Yeah,” replied Vernon, “We go over to mine too.”

Vernon turned back to Seungkwan, his other hand that was not holding onto Seungkwan’s reached up to pet his hair, “Promise we’ll actually study this time?” he asked

Seungkwan nodded

“Wait,” Seungcheol interrupted again, “If you aren’t studying what do you do when you go over to each other’s houses?”

Seungkwan looked at him confused, “What do you mean?”

“I mean like… What do you guys end up doing?”

Seungkwan looked at Vernon who was frozen to his seat, his face stoic, before turning back to Seungcheol, “Well, we play video games and watch shows and stuff.”

“That’s it?” Seungcheol asked surprised.

“I mean,” Seungkwan paused, “Sometimes we read.”

“Wait, Seungkwan do you seriously not know?” Seungcheol asked he looked as if he was about to speak again before Jeonghan placed a hand on his shoulder stopping him.

“He doesn’t, he’s an idiot,” Jeonghan said

“Know what?” Seungkwan asked

“Oh my god, Seungcheol,” Jihoon spoke from the other side of Vernon, “He’s oblivious, of course he doesn’t.”

“Know what?” He asked again.

“Don’t worry about it,” Jihoon replied, “Just eat your lunch.”

Vernon and Seungkwan looked at each other, Vernon dodged his eyes shrugging, turning away to eat his lunch. 

_____

As Seungkwan walked down the hallway to his final class he found himself thinking back to the conversation at lunch. What didn’t he know?