After:

They meet up at the abandoned tracks an hour after the funeral ends. Both Taehyung and Jimin already drinking. Immediately sharing their score with the other members.

This was usually the time where Jin would force them to take their time. Take the bottle from them. Namjoon couldn't. Though he was only a year younger than Jin, he behaved much like the Maknae's. Ill mannered, loud, consistently drunk. He wasn't a savior, and he damn sure wasn't going to start pretending to be one now.

Yoongi takes the seat next to him and hands him a cigarette. Lighting it up, Namjoon lets his mind take a break from his day of hell.

Yoongi was watching Taehyung and Jimin intensely. His eyes falling on the latter for a long moment. Jin had told him that relationship was complicated in the past. What he knew was that Jimin was interested. What he learned was that their relationship was nowhere as innocent as either claimed it to be. He continues watching the youngers stare. Once again he stays silent.

*__*

Hoseok who was sleeping in the corner. Awakes when he hears a loud crash, a few giggles follow then Jimin slides down beside him. It was nice. Lately, these were the only times he'd seen the boy smile. When he was drunk or high off his . A huge contrast to the many late night calls when he begged for help. When he begs for death.

Truthfully Hoseok wonders how the boy hides it so well. It worries him like it did with Jin. And that turned out as bad as he expected.

"You look really good in that suit Hobi." Jimin lays his head on Hoseok's shoulder and gives him the look. The same look that made him go streaking when he was just sixteen. The same look that made him give in to skipping class for three days in a row. The same look that makes him give into everything and anything the younger boy wanted.

"Jimin you're drunk." The boy shrugs and reaches over taking the drink out his hand.

"Jin hated it when we did this. We're disappointing him even from the grave." Bringing the bottle to his lips Hoseok allows himself to fall victim to another failed attempt at staying clean. No Pills. No Alcohol, and now at the first sight of trouble, he's doing everything Jin warned him not to. What a hypocrite he was, Jin took the easy way out. So why couldn't he?

"Hyung would understand." He always did.

*__*

Before:

Hoseok doesn't know how he was talked out of going to class by the younger boy, but here he was once again half in janitors closet making out with Park Jimin when he should be in his Math Class taking his exam. This was the third time this week he pulled him put off class, second time that day and he knew Jin would reprimand him for it later but right now Jimin was doing a great job keeping his mind busy.

"I love you Hobi," Jimin speaks as they break apart. The look alone was believable enough but Hoseok knew better. He didn't mean it, he never did. Hoseok knew he was simply in the moment. Jimin made it clear he was in love with one of their eldest friends, and the feelings were no longer returned. But he also knew Jimin needed the assurance that someone, anyone loved him. And lucky for him he did. Hoseok was desperately in love with Jimin who he knew would never return the feelings. The two were always one and the same. And sure it was selfish of him to take advantage of his best friend like this but it wasn't as if it wasn't mutual.

"Do you love me?" More than anything. Jimin's hand slowly drifts from his cheek to his neck. A soft innocent look graces his face. Every time Hoseok tells himself he wouldn't give in, he should let Jimin down, stop them both from being selfish. But every time he saw that look. Every time they get this close all he can remember was how much he wanted Jimin to want him the same way he wanted Yoongi. So he became Selfish once more. That's what he was best at.

"Of course. I love you too Jiminie." Jimin's smile was enough for him to remember why he did it. The younger boy leans forward, pressing their lips together one last time before he backed away and started getting dressed.

Without another word, or as much as a glance Jimin exits the closet, leaving Hoseok alone. It hurt knowing that this was basically just a way for him to forget.

Hoseok slides down the wall, grabbing his bag from beside him. Luckily he remembered to bring it this time. Opening the smallest section, he searches around for his Spongebob Pez Dispenser. Old but convenient.

Letting to blue pills fall into his hand, Hoseok attempts to convince himself not to, just for the hell of it. Two seconds later the pills are making its way down his dry throat, and he's shutting his eyes in relief as the pain slips away.

*__*

After:

Jimin ends up falling asleep on his shoulder a newly opened bottle still in his hand. Hoseok could feel Yoongi's eyes on him, and most importantly on Jimin. It wasn't a look he could read easily, nor was it one he's ever noticed before.

But he knew Jimin. Jimin was someone he was close to. Someone whom he cared for deeply, and amongst all the chaos that was his past they did have many talks. Most of which surrounded the older friend. Hoseok knew it was not right to fault Yoongi. Jimin was sick, and unwilling to admit as such he coped in dangerous ways. They had that in common.

"I'm gonna take him home." Hopefully, his parents weren't awake. The last thing he needed was to explain why he was carrying their underage, under the influence son, home way past curfew on a school night.