“So are you for sure coming back this time? It’s Christmas Yoong. You told us last year you’ll be back this year. No more backing out.” Sooyoung  whined over the phone. It’s been 3 years since I left Seoul for New York. It was tough at first, but now I’ve stopped keeping tabs on her. It seems like she’s happy. So I’m happy. I think I’ve really moved on. Yeah it’s fine now. 

“Alright alright, I promise that I will go home by Christmas.” I chuckled after hearing a collective “yes” in the background.

“That’s more like it, see you in a month Yoong~” I hear Yuri yell, before I dropped the call. 

“So are we really going back?” 

“Yeah, it’s time for you to meet the group.” I beamed. 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

They say time slows down when your excited, but for me it sped up so fast that it’s already 2 weeks before Christmas and here I am, back in Seoul. 

I wonder….how are you now?

“Yoong!! over here!” Sooyoung, Yuri, and Hyoyeon were bouncing up and down while waving their arms crazily.

“SHY!” I happily yelled out and ran towards my friend.

“Jeez it’s been forever!” Sooyoung exaggerated, when in reality we just saw each other 2 weeks ago when the gang visited for the Thanksgiving holiday in the states. 

“Budyy~” They all pulled me in a tight group hug. 

“Finally the squad is complete again.” Hyoyeon chuckled.

“Yes with the addition of one.” I smiled, gesturing for someone to join us. 

“Guys, this is Tiffany Hwang Miyoung, Fany-ah these are my friends.” I introduced my friend, yes she is just a friend. 

“Hello everyone, it’s finally nice to meet the infamous friends that Yoona here has.” Tiffany greeted everyone with her signature eye-smile.

“Well it’s nice to meet you too Tiffany-shi, it seems you heard a lot about us from this choding here.” Taeyeon was the first to speak.

“Yes, so when she asked me to come here with her I was very excited to meet you all and please just call me Tiffany, Tiff, Fany, but no Miyoung.” Tiffany lightly chuckled.

“Well you can do the same with us Fany, but guys can we please go now I’m already hungry since we’ve been here forever now~” Sooyoung whined, this giant always listening to her stomach.

“Okay Okay lets go.” 

We arrived at Sooyoung and Sunny’s house for dinner. And yep the two lovebirds finally moved in together, but don’t ask me while the couple isn’t married yet. I mean they have been engaged for years now. 

Anyways, before I could join the rest of the group, Taeyeon pulled me aside. 

“Hey Yoona.” She began, and when Taeyeon calls me “Yoona” in that soft motherly voice of hers I know it’s something serious. 

“What’s up?” I asked.

“Have you talked to Jessica?” She asked, like she’s trying to tell me something but she can’t. 

“No…actually I haven’t contacted her since I left.” I replied. Taeyeon usually didn’t bring Jessica up on her own will ever since I left, so… did something happen while I was away?

“So you didn't keep tabs on her at all?” She asked.

“Honestly? I did for a bit, then I realized that in order for me to forget about her, I need to ease her out of my life. Why did something happen?” I ask, trying to hide my growing curiosity.

“No no nothing happened, I was just curious that’s all. Well let’s head back, I’m sure everyone is waiting for us already.”

The dinner with my friends was great, Tiffany being the social butterfly fit right in. But Taeyeon pulling me aside like that kept gnawing at me, I just felt worried.

It was getting pretty late so we had to call it a night.

“Did you have fun tonight Fany-ah?” I asked the girl sitting next to me in the car.

“Mhm, I had a blast Yoona. Anyways, I talked to daddy and he said that one of our close family friend has a house here so I don’t have to stay at your place anymore. I’ll just be staying in their home. It’s vacant so it’ll just be me and that way it won’t be weird.” Tiffany confessed. 

“Weird? It’s not weird, your my friend Fany-ah. My home is always welcome to you. Plus, you really can’t cook to save your life so I think it will be better if you stay with me.” I countered.

“Really Yoona it’s okay. I want to try it. It’s my first time living by myself so I think it’ll be fun.” She animatedly replied and I couldn’t refuse.

“Alright fine you win, now what’s the house address.” 

When we arrived at the neighborhood where Tiffany’s house is located, I recognized the place right away. This is Jessica’s neighborhood and well it just so happens that Tiffany and Jessica are neighbors. Fate…it really likes to with you. 

“Okay here we are, home sweet home for the mushroom. Okay Ms. I can live alone grab your stuff.” I and she pouted at me.

“I said I want to live alone, that doesn’t mean I want to do it all alone.” She huffed and crossed her arm, while I chuckled at the cute site.

“Fany-ah you know I’m kidding, c’mon lets go get your stuff in. Tomorrow we can shop for the things you need at home.” I chuckled at the cute sight in front of me. 

“Yeah yeah, anyways text me when you get home okay?” 

“I will, now shut the door and lock it behind me okay mushroom, goodnight.” I smiled. 

“Yes yes now go home, it’s been a long day for the two of us.” Tiffany finally got rid of me.  

I was making my way to my car, when I ran into someone I thought I wouldn’t see right away.

“Yoo..Yoona” Jessica ran towards me and pulled me into a tight hug. A hug that felt like it was more than just a hug.

“J..Soo..Sooyeon.” I was shocked. I didn’t expect to run into her so soon. I wasn’t ready, but I guess now I have to be…one way or another. 

“Yoona…I missed you.” She whispered, I can feel my shirt starting to get wet, which meant that she was crying. I pulled away from her hold and wiped her tears.

“Hey whats wrong?” I calmly asked, I hate making her cry or sad. So knowing that I am the cause of her tears just kills me.

“I just really missed you. You left me for three years. I didn’t know what happened to you that you suddenly had to go like that. I woke up and you were gone, like everything was just a dream. When I went to work that day I found out that you left the country that I was now suppose to work with Sooyoung. Do you know how lonely I suddenly felt? I felt like I wasn’t important enough for you to tell me something like that. I thought that it was a joke so I tried to call, text, and e-mail but no response. You just disappeared Yoongie, and you didn’t even tell me why or say goodbye.” Jessica poured her heart out. 

I’m sorry…but I can’t, I can’t keep what isn’t mine…no matter how much this heart of mine still beats for you.

“Sooyeon-ah…I’m..I’m sorry. If I could tell you why I wouldn’t have had to go…but this was something only I can face. I’m sorry if I left you out like that… I didn’t mean to, I just…. I’m still so lost.” I admitted. 

“Yoona please talk to me, tell me what I did. I don’t want to lose you as my friend. I don’t know what it is exactly…but I just can’t lose you.” She kept crying, holding onto my collar for dear life. Jessica’s nose and cheeks were red, I don’t know if it’s from the cold or from her tears. 

“You won’t lose me okay. I’m sorry I went away for a while, but I’m back now. Can we talk tomorrow? It’s getting late you should head in I bet your husband is worried.” I tried to change the subject, but I got no response.

“C’mon, I’ll walk you.” I smiled, holding her hand and leading her to her doorstep. I rang the bell and Tyler looked surprised to see me.

“Hi Tyler, we sorta ran into each other just now while I was helping a friend.” I explained and he gave me a nod.

“Ah I see, uhm well would you like to come in?” He asked, but I politely declined, although it took a bit for us to convince Jessica to get inside. She finally relented when I promised to meet her again tomorrow. 

“Goodnight Sooyeon, Goodnight Tyler.” I bid the couple goodbye before finally ending my day. 

When I reached my house, the distinct smell greeted me. The caretaker still made sure the house is spotless. Smiling, I walked around the empty house. 

“I’m home.” I whispered, but its futile, because of course she isn’t here. She isn’t here running into my arms whining about how long I’ve been gone on a trip. She isn’t here to greet with a kiss and a tight hug. She just isn’t here, but oddly enough even though she isn’t here I can still smell her scent lingering in the air. Damn I must be crazy. 

“Jess…maybe I came back to soon. Seeing you again, made me realize that I can’t forget you. But I guess I can try to be just a friend.” I smiled, while looking at our portrait hung near our grand staircase.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

The following day, I went to fetch Tiffany so that we can finally make her house a home. 

“Hey there sleepyhead.” I chuckled when a groggy Tiffany opened the door for me.

“It’s still early Yoong..” She whined, letting me in and then heading straight to the couch to lay down again.

“Fany-ah c’mon it’s already 10am we need to get going.” I tried to wake her up, but I got nothing.

“Fany-ah~~~ wakey wakey.” I kept trying, but she is deeply asleep. She must still be tired from yesterday. I mean we did travel halfway across the world and didn’t get a bit of rest all day. It would be cruel of me to force her to wake up so I lifted her up bridal style and brought her back to bed. 

“Sweet dreams Fany-ah.” I smiled, tucking a stray hair away from her face.

“Mmmm thanks Yooo…” But she couldn’t even finish her sentence before falling asleep again. 

I was about to head to my car when I remembered something important. My promise. Fishing my phone out of my pocket I texted Tiffany and told her to text me when she wakes up so we can go shopping. Putting my phone back, I turned towards the door in front of me. With every courage I had, I rang the bell.

“Hi…uhm morning.” I awkwardly greeted this girl who I have no idea is.

“Hello, can I help you?” The girl looked at me like I was crazy. 

“Is Sooyeon here?” I asked and the girl gave me a fierce glare. Did I do something?

“TYLER!!” She suddenly shouted and Tyler came running out.

“Yoona?! Uhm what are you doing here?” He asked looking very shocked.

“I was looking for Sooyeon, remember I had promised her that I would see her again today.” I awkwardly replied, feeling very scared at the women who was glaring at me with all her might. I mean if looks could kill I would be dead. 

“I see, Yoona did your friends not tell you anything?” Tyler asked.

“Tell me what? I’m sorry Tyler I know I had sai..”

“No Yoona, I think you should really see her. If you go home you’ll know why.” He said and I nodded my head and made my way home. 

As I was driving my car I couldn’t help but feel anxious. Everyone has been so weird. First, Taeyeon then Tyler, and now Jessica. Why wasn’t she there and who was that woman?

“But all my thoughts were all put on hold when I reached my home. Opening the door I was met with silence. 

“What is going on?” I asked myself. I made my way to the master bedroom, but as I was about to open the door that door swung open and there in front of me she stood. Looking at me with wide surprised eyes. 

“Jes,..err Sooyeon?!” I rubbed my eyes, wondering if I was hallucinating, but she was still there looking at me with those hazel eyes of hers. 

“Yoona…” She softly called my name and again hugged me tight. 

“Hey why are you crying again? This is the second time you cried after seeing my face, I don’t think I’m sad to look at so what’s going on? Also why aren’t you at home did Tyler do something?” I patted her back, I can tell she was crying with the way her shoulders were moving. 

“Can you please just stop asking questions and hold me tight. Hold me tight and tell me that you won’t let go.” She begged and I complied. 

It took a while for Jessica to calm down. Once she did, I had her sit on our bed and made her some tea.

“Sooyeon can…”

“Please don’t call me with that name Yoongie.” She interrupted me.

“I’m sorry?” I looked at her. I was lost, confused, shocked, and slightly excited.

“Can you just say you missed me too?” She asked with sincere eyes.

“Okay I’m really not following? What is going on?” 

“This choding, I don’t remember you being the slow one Im choding. Do I really need to spell it out for you?” Jessica asked wrapping her arms around my neck. 

“I missed you hubby.” She whispered, burying her head in my neck and that’s when I started to understand the picture, but I had to confirm it. 

“Did you just call me hubby?!” I asked, and I felt her nod her head yes.

“Why?” I asked a second question, which I guess wasn’t a good question, because her head shot up and glared menacingly at me. Her glare is even scarier than that woman from earlier.

“Excuse me? did you just ask me why? Me, your wife, Jessica Im? Heol.” She pushed me away, and turned her back on me.

Wait WHAT?! Jessica knows her name! Jessica knows me! Jessica….my Jessica is back