Hikari POV

I sit, gazing into the blue horizon through the squarish window that seems to restrict the beauty outside. Jealous of those little swallows that venture out right into that scenery, given the opportunity to flap away from the monotonous voice echoing through the study room. He spoke with such wisdom but I just ain't the privileged one who could inherit them. I set my eyes back at him and feel sorry that age has caught up to him. There isn't a single spot on his face that is tight and smooth, age lines, wrinkles, dark spots, they had all mercilessly took over him. 

"Miura Sensei, is there no moment in your life that you wish to just take a step back and enjoy life?" It may sound like a blunt question as I realised later, but my intentions weren't exactly how it sounded so careless.

"I hope my princess aren't hinting that I should..."

Flustered, I denied his conjecture right away before the misunderstandings leads to far reaching consequences, "No no, sorry sensei if I gave you that idea. I'm just wondering why you are working so hard your whole life, teaching my father, my grandfather, the other Royals, and even with such a hopeless student like me, you still seem so driven, so passionate. Wouldn't you grow tired of it?"

"My dear princess, I like what I'm doing. I get to challenge myself as I face a new competitor, that to me is something that keeps me going. And to see the person be moulded into one of values and principles, the amount of fulfilment is so satisfying."

"Competitor?"

"You... and all my other students, they are my competitors. I have as much things to learn from you and as absurd as it sounds to you, i benefit much more from teaching you, princess than you can imagine."

"Me?! I am completely slow in politics and I can't even get the different reigns and history right, how are you benefitting from me?"

"You have much more to learn about yourself, princess. Be proud of who you are. I know you will turn out to be a great ruler, and a fine lady"

"You really think so, sensei? Frankly, I don't quite feel that I am the chosen one to lead the country. Oneesan is way better than me. Perhaps Uncle Asano will figure a way to let her return and rule instead of me."

"You know well that Princess Nao cannot be considered as an heir the moment she declared to pass on her title to you right and got married to the voyager right. Even if it is allowed, the throne will be handed to an undeserving man. The royal blood will be tainted."

To be honest, I have no idea what love is and I couldn't care more about it. There are so much more in life I desire before love, like friends and even freedom like the swallow outside of the window. Day in day out, I only have less than 10 friends. And as you figure, they are my loyal subjects too. No offence, they are great friends but they are mostly too proper around me. Ever since I became the Crown Princess at my 6th birthday, I stopped attending royal school and started private tutoring. I lost my friends because I'm simply too high up to play with. 

"... don't worry princess, you will find a prince who loves you as much as all of us, and assist you wholeheartedly."

Nah, I'm not really worried about that, I awkwardly smiled at his well wishes. This conversation has effectively took a good half hour but lessons are still far from ending. Sensei starts his tormenting recitals and immediately, my mind began to drift once more to the outside world beyond the palace's four walls. Here I am showered so much by the protection of everyone that life has become so mundane. I shudder at the thought of how by the next year when I hit 18, this life of mine will be permanent. I spring up from my seat when I hear a knock on the door and I see my royal counsellor emerging.

"Shohei!" I exclaimed with excitement. My saviour, and I always find him particularly attractive with his white shirt with sleeves half-rolled and a black pants. He ignores my beaming eyes that celebrates his entrance and politely greeted the two of us with a bow. "Your highness. Miura sensei."

Sensei is usually stern and strict with his son. He never smiles to him even though he loves his son so much. Many times during class, he would speak so highly of him but yet in front of him, he doesn't show any of that. As a result, Shohei didn't quite favour his father. In the beginning, he does try to impress his father but the latter sets such high expectations that regardless of his efforts, it never impresses. gradually Shohei gives up. Their relationship drifts apart and as much as I attempt to mediate, these 2 stubborn mules just never break the ice though deep down they love each other so much. 

"What is it? We are having lessons."

"Sorry to interrupt. I need a word with you, Miura sensei."

I looked at Shohei blankly, wondering why the urgency but it seems today he brought a news. I am not complaining cause I get to end lessons earlier.

"If you say so," sensei sighed but quickly gave me a stern look. "Princess, I trust you do your self revision for the coming test."

Another test?! I barely scrapped the last test. Sighing in my heart, I nodded and without any delay, I announced my departure before he nags any further at me. I didn't realise I actually skipped my way to the royal garden, until I hear laughters in the background "it's just 10 minutes earlier and your mood already over the moon. Wait till you hear the news from Shohei, you will probably hyperventilate."

A tall guy with black hair and bangs swept nicely to the side emerge from behind the shrubs. He is suited with a bulge under his blazer, around his waist where a pistol is securely strapped. Same as the other tall guy who walked behind him, but with a blonde hair. 

"Yuto, Yabu! You guys know what is it about?" I asked my two Royal Guards. Yabu is the Head of the Guards and that puts him also as the main in-charge of all the police and military force in Aoihoshi. He has a heavy responsibility and that kind of set his personality as a very stringent, quick-witted and no nonsense person. Some people finds him unapproachable but to me, he is a trusty elder brother who kept me safe and sound. Yuto, on the other hand, is quite the opposite. He is a mood maker despite the stressful job of ensuring my safety at all times. He spends so much time with me that he is likely the one who understands me inside out. He never fail to make me laugh when I'm upset, and listen to me when I'm stressed.

"Your wish came through!" Yuto exclaimed. My wish?! I have many, which are they implying? I stared at them who are about 2 heads above me.

"Don't you remember? You appealed to Shohei last month about trying out a normal high school... have you forgotten?"

I wasn't exactly serious when I made that request, mostly because I knew it was far-fetched and definitely impossible. I didn't expect Shohei to really fulfil it, and now that the wish is granted, I can't stop feeling totally exhilarated by it.

"Oh my gosh!!! Hooray!!!!" I jumped all around Yuto and Yabu.

"Eh hmm, watch your mannerism, Missy," Yabu held onto me before I make such a ruckus that others would see. He's always putting my behaviour in check. What will I do without him in my life. 

"Can't help it, I'm too happy. Hmm, what should I do first when I get out. Oh, cafehopping with friends, movies, shopping!!"

Maintaining a firm grip of my shoulders, I realised Yabu isn't completely pleased with my plan. He gazed at my with his usual straight eyes and spoke in his composure. "Wait up Hikari. There is a reason why this is granted and you have to remember what you promised Shohei when you appealed to him. Those agenda you just listed..."

I am sure he is about to tell me all my plans aren't possible, until another voice from behind cut him off. Shohei joins with a warm smile that keeps me comforted and at ease. Even if the world seem to be crumbling, Shohei gives the vibe that he can and will make sure everything is fine. Sometimes though I wonder if he's hiding his pain cause I do see him drowning himself in alcohol alone. There's so much apology I say to him silently for all the troubles I caused that he has to address and resolve. And no amount of sorries seem enough. Yabu and Yuto are like my brothers, Shohei is much more than that, he's like my pillar I will fall back on.

"The agenda she just listed, she'll do it one by one," he ruffled my hair as he speaks. He likes to do that, and I ain't complaining cause he spoils me like a little girl who never grows up. I like to keep it that way. Fortunately, my shoulder length hair is pretty tamed and it falls into place all the time. And I feel proud that Shohei only does this to me and not any other princesses who are craving for his attention. Princess Mariya is one, her major crush on Shohei never bear fruits no matter what she did to catch his attention. I do get possessive at times when it comes to Shohei. And there's Kiritani Mirei who's the palace's nurse. She has a huge crush on Shohei and the last I noticed, she is clumsy around him, hiding all over. 

"She can?!" Yuto and Yabu spoke together, looking at Shohei confused. Actually, I am confused too. I don't think the palace is so charitable on giving me such extend of freedom, especially I have the tendency to mess things up. It only happens in dreamland I supposed.

"Have some faith in this girl. I believe she can survive the 1 year outside without causing a turmoil back home," he says it with a motivational tone that I started believing I really can do it. If he's not a royal counsellor, I guess he'll do well as a teacher or a spiritual leader. He got some traits from his father with a whole lot of fun, charm and gentle. "It's just a few ground rules you need to note. I'll talk to you two in a while. Right now, you'll follow me to meet Iwata."

I followed him and rushed to his side as he walked out of the garden. I could hear Yabu asking if they would need to follow and Shohei simply waved his hand without turning to them and hollered, "it's alright. I'll send her back. Help me inform Yuriko!"

Yuriko is my beautiful maiden. But albeit her beauty, she's not demure at all. On the contrary, her actions are quite tomboyish. we grew up together and we spend literally all the time together that we know what each other is thinking without saying a word. I do hope she's a little feminine though so that I can learn from her and be comparable to those wholesome princesses who dazzles in the eyes of the noble princes. Sometimes, i really think I'm just a unattractive girl and these guys around me ain't helping. Well, the plus point is the best looking dudes are all mine! I laughed with my inner devil.

"Oh, it's her again..." 

I looked where Shohei is implying and saw her hiding again in a corner. I chuckled to myself then waved to her, spoiling her cover right away.

"Your highness... and Miura-sama" She greeted so politely. She's so shy she didn't even look up.

"Hi Mirei~" she always looked shocked when I call her casually. I do it to everyone if she hasn't figured. Shohei is smart at all levels and I'm sure he realises her feelings towards him. Yet he treats her so indifferent as compared to the other ladies who flirt with him. I really can't understand at all. Maybe he's like those jerks Yuriko mentions she hates.

"Do you need anything, Mirei-san?" He asked, ignoring her anxiety.

"I w-wanted to check if your body is feeling better? I heard about your injury"

I heard from Yabu that Shohei hurt his shoulders in a combat practice but I didn't hear it was serious enough to be any concern. I look at Shohei briefly and glance at his shoulders beneath his shirt worriedly. 

"I'm much better. Thank you." He answered so normally that it feels awkward for her since it made her look like she's completely overreacting. She blushed and lowered her gaze again.

"If there's any pain, he'll look for you. Ne, Shohei?" I tried to ease her embarrassment and I was glad Shohei agreed to my suggestion.

"Right. Maybe I'll get some patches from you when I drop by the East Wing."

Her eyes brightened. I had a good look and realised she has a pair of really shimmering eyes and sharp gestures. She's pretty. "I'll bring it to you. That'll save you the trouble."

"But I shouldn't impose on you."

"It's okay. That's my job."

"If you insist, thanks Mirei." I hear his salutation changed and that makes for a good ending. A smile crept up her face and it is mesmerising even for a girl. As soon as she departed, we resume our way to his car. He drives a convertible and he knows I love it when he opens the roof. I stand up with my head stuck outside, the light breeze blowing against my face is so soothing that I let my soul be taken away.

"Shohei~... what do you think of Mirei?"

"What about her?" He focuses on his driving and doesn't sound at all interested.

"She's nice, much nicer than the other princesses."

"Hmmm thanks for the introduction. I already have someone I love"

"You do?!"

"My crown princess Matsua Hikari - my love"

I exclaimed but when I heard the answer, I gave him a stare of sarcasm. "You really don't consider her?"

"If I were to be really frank, no. I don't have any feelings for her. I can consider Princess Mariya though if she is nicer to you."

"She won't ever be nicer" i frowned at the thought, mumbling to myself, "look at how hostile Mariya is and she leads her clique of princesses with her like she's the boss of them"

"Don't bother about her. You know she's just jealous... At least for the next one year. Here, we've reached," he opened the door for me and I followed him to the private room of a japanese tea house. When we arrived, Iwata is already inside. 

"Come here... I miss you quite a bit" he brought me into his embrace and for a minute, I don't really wanna let go. He is the one who dotes on me most and gives me the best princess treatment. He's the youngest minister in the cabinet and is also the chief liaison with the palace. He has the most gorgeous smile that could kill any girl in his radar but yet, I have never seen him date anyone. I wrapped my arms around his torso and that was as high as I can reach, and gave him a tight squeeze.

"How are you doing?"

"Nearly failed a test" Miura who has settled down takes every opportunity to tease me. I'll never settle for that without a quibble

"I passed a test, you mean." I challenged while taking a sit beside him. Iwata took the opposite sit and place a stack of documents in the front.

"Class 3A of Horikoshi Senior High School. Here's the information of every single student you need" Iwata handed it over to Shohei and the latter begins to study it right away. 

"Hmm some of these girls seem quite attractive.... Matsui Airi... hmm"

"And... Umika Kawashima is quite adorable too" Iwata added on to Shohei's comments and the two went on to examine the rest.

"Erm... guys, I'm here you know..." I showed my annoyance and they immediately burst in laughter with Shohei's hand ruffling my hair.

"Let's talk about the guys in that case... they look rather, hmmm, weak..." the guys continued laughing. I snatch the document from them then browse it myself. 

"They look good." My eyes are captivated by a few already. It reads Yamada Ryosuke, Arioka Daiki, Chinen Yuri, ah, Chiba Yudai looks cute too. They look less obnoxious than the other royal princes roaming in the palace grounds. They look like those guys-next-door, down to earth.

"Hold it, missy. I know what you are thinking. Harmless dudes? Nah, Don't get too serious in it. Guys aren't so innocent as they looked," Shohei retrieve the documents from my hand and finally the mood turns back to a more serious note. "Let's get to business, shall we. We managed to convince Asano to agree to let you spend one year in a local school, but it's only with some strings attached."

I am downright surprised because my uncle, the only brother my father has, is very stern with me. If it wasn't for Shohei who's always helping to cover up my mess, I would have been punished so many times by him. He probably sees me as a prick and the likely doom to the Kingdom. I never meet his expectations and I hope he could see I am really trying hard. I never quite get the love from my uncle and I am almost craving for it which Shohei, Yabu, Yuto, Yuriko could see so prominently. In that sense, I could already expect some really tough strings attached to this offer. 

"I didn't expect uncle to agree"

"I beg to differ. He has to agree. You currently lack the knowledge about your people and it's not something my father can teach you from the books."

"Yes, Hikari... we discussed and thought it may be beneficial for you to be exposed to the people you would rule directly. That will get you to empathise with them, study their ideal world, and learn how to become the ruler they hope to see. Asano can't agree more that the best teaching is one that puts the student in the environment in she is supposed to learn." Iwata makes such a frivolous request from me sounds so justifiable. I feel guilty by my insensibility and lack of depth.

"... Hikari, you are not zoning out on me right?" 

Completely not realising I was too deep in my thoughts, I quickly snapped out of it. "Heh, no, I'm just thinking how I shouldn't disappoint at the end of the year"

"You probably should see that once you complete the one year, it'll be coronation. What you learn then will be crucial as Queen. But don't fret over this, let nature take its course. I'm sure there's much to learn outside."

By now, I can't hold back my tears anymore. Shohei brought me closer and while leaning on his shoulders, I start pondering to the question  of my overwhelming emotions. Instead it was Shohei and Iwata who knew better.

"You haven't been outside for slightly more than 10 years. Enjoy this short freedom, do what you love. Leave the rest to us." I am touched by Iwata's words as Shohei lightly patted my back. I feel loved, so what more do I ask.

"Not gonna pressurise you but while Yabu, Yuto and Yuriko will be assigned to watch over you, they can't possibly be there 24/7. you need to be careful of your behaviour when you are outside. Just make sure you keep the golden rule in mind - you are a crown princess, so do nothing that jeopardise this fact."

It's not just about jeopardising the Kingdom. I look at Shohei and Iwata, I knew what I shouldn't jeopardise. They are doing their best to help me and I cannot do anything to hurt them. Not just Shohei and Iwata, the rest as well. When we are leaving, I stopped on my feet  and said to the two who looked at me confused.

"Thank you. I truly am." They returned me a reassuring smile. I rushed to them and clinged onto their arms on both sides.

***

Yabu enters the meeting room within the North Wing where Shohei's residence was. There, he sees Iwata already sat inside and the two were engrossed in a tense communication. Yabu knew it has to be some complications with Hikari's plans.

"Ah, Yabu, you are here." Iwata announced. Yabu sat with the two after a subtle greeting. 

"Let's just cut the long story short. We have to put our highest alert on Hikari in this coming year. We all know there're people waiting for her to screw up big time for an indefinite postponement of her coronation, and even cause her to lose her title and position." Shohei explained. 

"Shall not name names. Whatever it is, we have to focus to protect Hikari. One of our biggest challenges is her identity. No one beyond the palace should know her real identity. So Yabu, Yuto and Yuriko, you guys need to play your roles well and be discreet if not you'll arouse suspicion," Iwata added. Yabu raised his brows and reminded the biggest threat.

"Hikari herself is the biggest risk though" Yabu commented with a straight face. 

Iwata and Shohei agreed immediately with laughing erupting. "She's indeed our biggest headache." But there's one thing serious about what Yabu said that hit them right on the spot, and it is that whatever the political challenges may be, what may affect her most is learning about people and relationships. That's something no one else can help but herself.

As the rest left the room, Shohei picked up his phone and saw a missed call from none other than the silly girl. He calls back and when she picks up immediately, he knows she is stationing herself at her phone, still not asleep.

"Yes, princess~"

"Shohei... i wanna ask you, now that I'm stopping my lessons with your father, what will be of him?"

Shohei is surprised by Hikari's question. She has so much to worry on her plate already, yet she is worrying for the last person. Laying onto his bed and his arms behind his head, he answered her after a pause, "He'll take a break for now. Besides, he's getting old, he'll need that...."

Hearing no response from Hikari, he asked further, "why did you suddenly ask?"

"It's just that he said some stuff today, he really love teaching. And I feel like I'm taking it away from him and I probably gave him the impression I didn't like him when I made the request to head out"

Shohei sat up when he heard her say such rare profound and sensible words. 

"Hikari~"

"Yes?"

"My father is proud to have you as his student, and he knows there are somethings in life he can't teach you and that's why he supports this endeavour. He won't take it personally and you shouldn't take it to heart too. Just do your best and make him prouder than he is now.

"Thank you, Shohei..."

"Anytime ~"

"Your shoulders, is it still hurting?"

"Ah, just a little stiff sometimes but it isn't hurting much. Don't have to worry about it"

"I'll give you a massage tomorrow!" 

He held back his chuckle and thank her sincerely. He thought to himself how lucky it would be for the guy who gets her love. Her innocence can really make the world feel so much like a better place. 

"It's okay Hikari. Just prepare yourself well for the day after next. If it's too rush for you to enrol, let me know. I can postpone it"

"No no. I don't wanna enter school on a different date as everyone else. It'll be less stressful to start off a new year with the lot."

"No problem. Sleep early dear."

"You too! Goodnight niichan!"

He chuckled this time by her address. It's cute, she's cute. 

The next morning came and he dresses up in a black tee and jeans with a pair of sunglasses and is prepared to run some errands all till evening. 

"Miura-sama" his servant girl called out.

Sipping his cup of coffee, he remarked, "Yes?"

"There's a lady loitering outside earlier. Not sure if she's still there."

"Who is it, did you ask?" He raised his brows.

"I didn't manage to approach cause when she sees me, she walks away."

"Strange... guess it's not important. anyway noted. Ah, before I forget, help me send this to father. Say It's the book from his favourite author. "

"Sir, you got it autographed. He will love it, don't you wanna pass it to him yourself?"

"Not necessary. You know we'll end up bickering if we meet. Besides I just had a nagging session yesterday. Totally not ready to continue today."

"Understand, sir. Have a good day" 

Shohei stepped out and faced the first blaze of the scorching sun. Looking at the sky through the darkened shades from his glasses, he knew today is definitely a bad day to run errands. Fortunately, it's mainly indoors. Just when he is about to enter his convertible, he sees the mysterious lady in the corner. She is so busy trying to flick a bug off her hand that she hasn't realised he has walked to her side. Shohei gripped her by her wrist, restraining her like a suspicious trespasser.

"Who are you?!" He sternly exclaimed while she cried out in pain by his restrain. She looks up with pleading eyes and only then he realises, "Oh no... sorry, I didn't know it's you. Mirei."

Upon letting her go, she clumsily stood up with twigs in her hair. Shohei looks at her with amusement and chuckles when he is sure she's not aware of her dishevel. 

"Heh?" She jumped slightly like a frightened kitten when he reaches out to her to remove those twig. He hasn't seen such reserved and shy girl for a while and he finds himself slightly annoyed when she is shocked over every gesture he makes. What makes him most intolerant is when her head is almost ever down and he only speaks to the top of her head. It went even lower when she feels the embarrassment of the twigs in her hair.

"S-sorry."

That apology was unnecessary, Shohei thought. He suppressed his annoyance then went on to ask her purpose. 

"I brought the patches for you." She withdrawn a few patches from her pocket and hands over with straightened arms. Shohei nearly forgot about it but was perplexed by why she needed to be sneaky. She's almost like paparazzi. It scares him a little by her weirdness, even if she did have a crush on him, it's just illogical for her to act so weirdly in front of him.

"Thanks. You really didn't have to trouble yourself. How long have you been out under the sun?"

"No no, not very long." Shohei doubted her response. Observing her subtly from head to toes, he sees a extremely exhausted girl. "I d-didn't want to impose on your rest"

"Hmm just pass it to my servants. Then you don't have to tire yourself..." she nodded to herself. Shohei doesn't have the time to continue her awkward interactions as he looks to his watch. "Sorry, I would invite you in another time. I'm running a little late for appointment. I'll drop by the department for you another day, alright?" He gives a brief smile before leaving her behind, hopping into his car and drove off without another look.

***
Hikari POV

In the break of dawn, I am already in the front seat of the car, beside Yabu. I am not at all tired from the insomnia the night before, instead am still experiencing the adrenaline rush. I want to let Yabu feel how happy I am so I grab his exposed lower arm with my cold hands. He jumped a little but refused to give me a glance.

"Hikari, give me a warning next time. I'm driving you know," he said. His words may sound blunt but his face is soft today, as if taking deliberate steps to prevent me from getting any more panic attack from first day of school. He reaches out his free hand and hands over his jacket. I snuggle right into it, even if it's for only a short while. I didn't have to ask, he didn't have to offer, that's how synchronised we are. I gave him a smile and he did too. I look out through the window and see Yuto in a motorbike beside our car. I wave stupidly at him, and he waves back with the same frequency as me. Thats a balance with my 2 guards. I chuckled to myself. And there it is, at the back of our car, Yuriko, riding in a car drove by Yabu's subordinate. For the next one year, Yuriko would be the one within my closest reach as she's gonna be the school nurse, though I swear she's not that proficient in her medical skills. She did try to negotiate with Iwata another role, but nothing sort of fits. Besides, it's hard for him to arrange since only the principal is aware of my identity.

"Where will you and Yuto be?" I ask as soon the car came to a halt.

"We will be around, so don't worry. But we'll only be there if your life is in danger. Otherwise, it's all on yourself, understand?"

That sounds precarious. I look at the school on my left and what I see is a building made of red bricks and a clock tower right in the middle. The school is enclosed by a white gate that has survived natural elements of air and water. Rust forms in the corners. Horikoshi Senior High School - the name of the school sits proudly at the side of the gate. While the school is not nearly as majestic as the Royal School, the Old European Style architecture strangely gives off a very classy and distinct image. Almost like as if I've seen it in classic tales of sorts. It brings smiles almost instantly and instills a sense of pride though I've barely even started.

"Well, well. Here you are. Excited?" 

It's not about what Yabu said that stunned me. It is how affectionate he is today, completely immersing into a role he hasn't explicitly showed before - a big brother. His arm wraps around mine and I lifted my head to look at him in his lips curled the way mine did.

"You are very early. You sure you don't wanna hang around first?"

"No it's alright. I want to make sure I have enough time to find my way around and possibly settle down first " Yabu nodded and let me be. One reason why he didn't oppose to my weird request of reporting to school exactly one hour earlier, is because everyone knows how poor I am with directions. 

It's empty, the entire school. I follow the signs carefully, passing by the canteen which is only slightly bigger than my private dining hall. There are few stalls and in front of them are rows and rows of seats. Just thinking of how it would be to sit with everyone and chat makes me excited and nervous all at the same time. Then I head upstairs where there's one row of classes, it says Class 1A to F. I presume that's for year one. At the back of the classes is where the common library is located. It's yet to open but I see the shelves of books staring at me. I don't like to read but strangely this library draws me constantly. Perhaps I should visit it during lunch. Upstairs to the second level it's Class 2A onwards so I guess the third level is class 3A onwards. I looked for the small signage imprinted at the corner of the door or each room and easily found Class 3A

"Yeayy, I'm early!" Celebrating my victory of getting to class without being lost, I jump with joy. Then likened to the tale of Goldilocks, I tried on all the seats. I'm excited from role playing myself how a class of students and a teacher would be like. If anyone is to walk past now and see me, they'll think I'm crazy. Literally.

8am

An hour after I reach, I change my mind. I do hope someone sees my insanity. Why? Because there's literally no one in sight even when school is supposed to have officially start. I checked again in case I missed some information. "Hmm, assembly" i trace my fingers to the right slot. Shouldn't everyone be here for this assembly? Did I miss out anything? I went on to search for small prints, but there aren't any.

I hear the sound through a mic. Wait, it's someone's voice. I went out of class and is dumbfounded to see students lined up in front of the clock tower. "AHH SO ASSEMBLY IS NOT IN CLASS?!" If Yabu and Yuto have seen my blunder, they'll probably be rolling on the floor laughing. There's no time to manage their disappointment in me, I rush off to the first floor without having seen by the students gathered at the parade square. I sneak to the back of columns of students but realise i am not sure which is the right one. Yabu did show me the class photos but I can't recall any of them, especially not in this mess. Some students notice my confusion and I could see them sniggering at the back. To avoid further embarrassment, I depend on myself, counting the columns starting from 1A. I really feel like slapping myself when I had to recount after being distracted by the mic.

Finally, 3A. I really have no idea if I'm in the right one. There's a taller girl in front of me. She has nice curves on her long hair and her legs are really long and slim. The short skirt actually fits her figure. I'm sadly nothing in comparison, even against those princesses in the palace. Why did I have my dad's short genes while oneesan gets mother's tall genes. i sulk while continuing to worry my current situation. I gather my courage to call out to her if this is 3A. Once, twice, she didn't react at all. When I saw wires running to her ear, like a robot charging in its dock, I knew she probably cant hear me. My imagination did run wild.

I was last in the queue for awhile until in the middle of the school anthem, I heard footsteps then a presence behind me. I turn back and saw a guy, putting down his sling bag while removing his music plugins from his ear. His hair beneath the sun is a beautiful chestnut colour. His beady eyes shimmer along with his sharp features flaunting so charmingly. His jawlines is most attractive, captivating me for just a bit. He didn't seem to notice my attention on him so I took a few steps behind until I could feel his body heat radiating onto mine. He is taken aback from sure. Looking at me with raised brows, he makes me nervous. I asked, albeit I'm not sure he could hear me above the anthem, "anou... is this class 3A?" I was right. He either couldn't hear or he couldn't be bothered. There is no response from him, instead, I attracted unwanted attention.

"One warning for you, young lady." A male teacher slipped past me and gave me a stern glare. My face flushed with embarrassment with the people around me giggling or staring at me like I'm an alien. The teacher walks away and i am left again in the vacuum of uncertainty.

Was it a few seconds or minutes, I felt a shadow clouding over behind me. i turn slightly and immediately, I am stunned by the proximity between me and the student behind me. "Yes this is 3A"

"Hah thanks!" I turned around and bowed naturally. His smile greeted me but only for a short while (I didn't even get a good glimpse) before a danger looms. A tightness is felt on my ears. The same teacher is pulling my ears and drags me to the back where the other teachers are. The student behind didn't attempt any eye contact with me even though I desperately showed my plea. He simply moves forward in the queue. Already, I'm hoping Yuto is here to save me. But I guess, the student did what he can to address my concerns without getting himself implicated. First encounter with the real world. I got a second warning from that teacher. Fortunately, my supposed homeroom teaacher spotted me and tries to explain. Hitomi sensei, a tall lady and seems rather soft spoken, took me with her and return to class.

"Hikari right?"

"Yes."

"Your previous school, doesn't practice morning assembly or sing school anthem?" 

Figured she might think why I didn't know to remain silent during this every morning event. How should I explain it? Royal school doesn't do that. I have one-to-one private tutoring? Sigh, she'll probably think I'm strange.

"Yes. My school doesn't have this practice." That's sort of the truth. I'm still a saint. I laughed silently. Yet the next moment, I'm telling a blatant lie, not one, but three.

"Hi! My name is Suzuki Hikari." 

Lie number one - My name is Matsua Hikari.

"I come from the rural ourskirts of Aoihoshi."

Lie number two - I come from the Royal Kingdom of Aoihoshi.

"Yoroshiku Onegaishimasu"

Lie number three - I'm not just another student. I'm a crown princess, soon-to-be queen. So I'm not sure how this friendship will turn out when it's build on such lies. I really am not sure.

Guilt-stricken, I awaited the Hitomi sensei's next instruction. She directs me to a seat beside this sweet looking girl. She looks nice and I am beginning to feel optimistic about circumstances. I sit beside her and turn to her. Cat caught my tongue. Nothing seems to come out of my mouth. 

"Hi. My name is Umika Kawashima," she said first. I smiled back. Well, that's awkward. But my mind is blank. What should I say? Then I miss the opportunity cause another girl came to talk to her as soon as sensei walked out. Is she the girl standing in front of me at the assembly just now? It seems so. She didn't introduce herself to me, but through their conversations, I heard, her name is Airi. She's really pretty, like a model.

Oh, this means the guy behind me earlier, he must be here too. i look around and I see a group of guys crowding around and talking casually. He's right there, at his seat, while the other 3 of his friends standing around. Now that I have a better look at him, he's really charming. He has a very sweet smile. Shall I go thank him for earlier? It's the best chance to strike a conversation. Perhaps he'll be my first friend? When I gathered my courage to stand up, another teacher came in, signalling the start of lessons. I crumbled back to my seat. I failed. I leaned my head on the table in utter disappointment with myself. All till lessons ended, I'm still restless. I can't seem to focus on anything. I saw the rest going for lunch - Umika and Airi. Everyone had their cliques. What about me? Am I forgotten? So much thoughts echoed in my mind.

"Hikari deshou?" A voice behind interrupted my thoughts. I lifted my head and there he is. The guy who helped me. I spring up from my seat and frantically nodded.

"Sorry about that earlier."

 "It's okay. I shouldn't implicate you."

"Thanks for understanding. Anyway, nice to meet you. I'm Yamada Ryosuke." 

His name. His voice. His face. Everything about him so far is perfect. He's pretty. Gosh, i don't think I'm even as pretty as him? If that's the right word to use for a guy... not feminine kind of pretty but just simply flawless. Even when he walks away, he leaves behind a lingering presence. Simply breathtaking.

"Ahhhh." Not that I literally screamed out, but I was really rockbottom when I saw I'm alone in the class. Alone.

As I strolled along the corridor to join Yuriko in her nurse's office, I think to myself why I'm shocked being alone. I'm almost always alone anyway. Not that Yabu, Yuto, Yuriko, Shohei or Iwata aren't my companions, it's just that sometimes, I feel alone in the pursuit of a dream that i doubt it's mine. 

"Hikari... you sure you okay? You look like you lost your soul..."

Yuriko taps my shoulder while I am nibbling on my food. I barely have my appetite. So I may really look like I have lost my soul. 

"I'm okay... just a little tired" 

I didn't want to disappoint them especially when they help me obtain this rare opportunity. I bare a smile and munched my lunch with my stiff expression of deceiving happiness while hoping that things will be better in the afternoon.

Who am I kidding?! No. I'm still feeling out of place with every classmate talking among themselves and I am not included. How is it possible that in a class of 20, I can't find my own rightful place? This is my life. My faith. Finding my rightful place feels so difficult. 

The day didn't past without any learning points though. So in my silence, several things I observed:

1. Umika Kawashima seems to have a crush on Chinen Yuri, apparently the smartest boy in class. He is petite and I could completely understand why Umika likes him. He has a very bright and sunshine image, and just like Ryosuke, he is quite 'pretty' too.
2. Matsui Airi is always in a healthy bickering with Arioka Daiki who strangely has a brotherly image. Very dependable look and also a mood maker. He is not exactly the pretty sort, but his warm character does make him look the most approachable. Airi also seems to 'idolise' Ryosuke. Hmm... she openly admits her liking for him, almost to an extent of idolising? 
3. Ryosuke, on the other hand, has a sense of mysteriousness. He doesn't speak as much as the rest but he looks very focused at his tasks and he has this power to kind of draw people to him. Wherever he goes, there seems to be a crowd. Natural leader?

I sat in Yabu's car and reflected as he drove me back. I didn't conceal my feelings enough when I kept completely silent and lethargic in his car as opposed to my morning enthusiasm, and I absentmindedly walked right into Shohei on my way to my chambers.

"Hey hey hey, my princess, are you gonna tell me what's wrong today?" He pressed unto my forehead and made sure I was looking into his eyes as he spoke. I really didn't wanna lie to him, but I had to. He's the last person I want to worry. 

"I'm okay"

I hate myself for lying the entire day. It is almost like the entire day is pretentious.

"Goodnight" I walk past him, one sidedly denouncing the end of conversation. I crashed onto my bed, flat down like a elephant in fatique. What posture, mannerism doesn't matter. It's me and my own bed.

***
Yabu POV

Without telling, I'm definite Shohei has loads to ask. I get Hikari's intentions for not saying cause by her nature, she dislikes making others worry for her. But Yuto and I saw the whole emotional stress she went through the day. I expected it though, but to see it actually happen, I feel sort of sympathetic for her. 

"I can only say she's really terrible at her social skills"

Shohei seems enlightened. His expression softens at the reassurance is not something that serious, but he could also have realised its an inherent problem neither of us could help. I explained what exactly happened and I thought he would suggest something more intelligent. Honestly, he is doting on her too much but since he's like the grand counsellor, i shall just give him the due respect.

"I don't agree with intervening at this point. It's something she needs to overcome. Besides that's the purpose anyway right, to imbue in her a sense of connection with the people."

"You have another suggestion, Yabu?"

"Leave it to me..." I exit the room, not explaining anymore. I walk with my gut feel and it tells me she's right there. I smiled in pride of my accuracy then quickly return to my stoned expression. I am already standing beside her yet I feel I'm invisible. I clear my throat to attract her attention which amusingly startled her

"Yabu~" shocked expression back to her upsetting face took only less than a second. 

"It's after lights out time and yet you are hanging out alone in such a dangerous and isolated area that many servant girls are attacked.. how many times have I said?! The Kingdom is not crimeless."

Her head hung low like. That's unlike her normal self who would pout or argue. None of that she attempted. Instead she admitted her guilt readily. I joined her, sitting by the edge of the pavement that overlooks the pond. Our legs dangled at the edge, hers very much shorter than mine. I was almost about to reach the pond water.

"Next time, just ask. I'll come with you. It's safer" 

Sigh, her mood is written all over her face and frankly, I feel a little sorry for her. She hasn't been exposed to normal people for such long since the death of the King and Queen, now been thrown out there with us trying not even to help her. It's difficult for us to watch her too. We hope she understands.

"Hikari..." I haven't been so soft to her, maybe the ambience is right. She looks at me with the same pair of innocence eyes I see all these years when protecting her. She earnestly waited for me to speak.

"Those people, they aren't like you. They are strong, independent because they are faced with all kinds of life challenges that's very much different from those you face."

"... i want to befriend them and understand them, but they aren't letting me in..." she finally breaks lose and reveals her grievances, yet it didn't sound like complaints at all. The other princesses would have kicked a big fuss for the lack of attention by now and would demand for 'execution' of those unworthy citizens. Her purity would have touched her people but it won't stand her in good stead. Not in this lifetime at least.

"You aren't letting them in either, my princess" I had to put it crudely no matter how apologetic I am.

"I am. I am trying so hard," she defended but I relentlessly shot her down.

"You aren't. Let me ask you just one simple question."

She waits, and i turn away from that pitiful eyes. "Did you ask them for lunch?"

Hikari is smart. She has always been. She just needs prompters to set her thinking in the right direction. As she remains quiet to my question, I knew she understood my intentions. 

"They don't owe you anything. So they needn't be the one to invite you. Take the initiative to ask them if you can join. Even if they reject it, at least you tried. It's better than not doing anything."

"Will they agree?"

"It's premature to worry about their reaction. Besides, it's beyond you.... But I'm pretty sure they will like you though." Finally, the curve on her lips makes me feel relieved and my relief is possibly written on my face too. 

****
Hikari POV

Yabu's kind words ran through my mind over and over again as I leaned my chin on the table while looking at my classmates gathering in their natural cliques. I listen to their discussion on their after school activities and started feeling pessimistic about attempting Yabu's suggestions. It's hard to not think negatively since these plans clearly excludes me. Why do I feel so left out. Luckily, Airi's entrance kept me distracted from my own problems for awhile.

"Stop sulking and tell me already. What's wrong with you? Maybe I can help?" Umika turns her chair around to face the seemingly angsty Airi. 

"There's nothing you can help. If he finds out I'm making the same mistake again, I'll really be screwed."

"Oh. You're fretting over Mina's last minute dropout?"

"What else can it be?" 

I could hear her crashing on the table in the same extent of disappointment as me, though I can't seem to interpret anything she just said. Perhaps I'm just not listening hard enough.

"Then that's easy. Just get a replacement."

"Easy for you to say. The last time we tried to get a replacement, we spent 5 days on the recruitment and no one actually turned up because they either think we are too good or they just stereotype that the girls don't play Soccer."

An idea struck my mind. "I can! I don't mind joining" Airi and Umika look at me blankly. The latter sat closer to me, and for the first time since yesterday, I feel I'm wanted. 

"You can? Really?" Airi and Umika say coherently like twins. When I gave them a definitive reassurance, they jump with joy. I am so soaked in that joy that my senses are numbed. I find myself embracing that attention from the class as other people who knew of Airi's problem came over to celebrate the good news. Chinen is one of them. Amid my joy, I also notice how Umika quietens and backs away slightly when Chinen went close to us. That is adorable. Someday I want to experience the same thing. I heard Airi and Umika describing it day in and out and that heart fluttery feeling really sounds magical. 

"After class, meet me at the fields at 3. I'll need to inform the management and all. Dont be late ya." Airi said.

The whole time in class, I was mostly distracted. I never run dry of my excitement and this could possibly be my happiest day, especially when I am invited to lunch with Airi and Umika. I didn't talk much but I guess giving them my attentive ears and showing interest counts. Airi isn't around most of the time, and when I do see her, she appears flustered like she's really busy with whatever she has to do for the soccer practice. It's impressive to be the lead of the all female team ne. Umika and I talked about that. She shared my same admiration for Airi - she's pretty, tall and sporty all at once. If only I remain in this delusion, yes my apparent utopia where everything is the way I want it  to be. Unfortunately, utopia really is far from reality, and happiness seem shortlived. 

In a twist of event, I now wish fairy godmother was here. I thought they always do, but perhaps my only fairy godmother is the helpless Nakajima Yuto. I looked at my watch which shows 2.30pm and there I'm hopelessly calling my guard in a corner of the stadium.

"Yuto, you've got to help me!"

"Why did you even volunteer? I mean you cant even play soccer. Do you even know it's a ball?"

"Nakajima Yuto, you ain't helping..."

"I'm trying... to understand what exactly you're thinking when you volunteer"

"I didn't know it is a match! It should be a practice session."

"It's probably your misinterpretation. From what I just found while talking to you on the phone, the match has been fixed all these while."

"Yuto... please..."

"Sorry. I'm just as frustrated as you are, cause I really don't know what I can do in my position. Maybe I can speak to the principal to halt the match?"

"No, that can't be done. Airi is looking forward to the match."

"Who's Airi and why should we care about her when you are worried of your circumstances now" Yuto sounds frustrated as usual whenever I caught him off guard. I do understand though, genuinely, that I am a headache who gets priorities all wrong.

"Airi is my friend. I can't take away something she likes.... Yuto..." there's a long pause, and it took him longer to respond. 

"Let's tell Yabu. He can help."

"No, he'll kill me."

"Okay, then if you trust me, then listen carefully. Later on, your policy is to avoid the ball at all cost. Make sure you're never in the line of the action."

"So... it's like helping Airi by not helping?"

"Bingo. That's my best solution, and it's the safest."

"Okay, I'll try. Guess it's easier to avoid it than tackle it." 

Everything happened so fast I won't be surprised that it took only a second. I only blinked my eyes and I'm in the field, that big field with people scattered all over. I looked around to see girls on my side in the same attire, shorts and a red jersey, while the other side, blue jersey. Regardless of the sides, both groups of girls are focused on the perfectly round object. When the whistle blows and everyone just run after it, looks hilarious too. I have been in a daze a tat too long and by the time I reacted, I was the only one stationary. I could almost hear Yuto's nagging that I should the least pretend to be enthusiastic. Exactly, I was too obvious if I completely stay away. So I ran with the girls, except always delayed. I sustained the momentum, with the jitters gradually going away with the butterflies in my stomach. 

I felt the relief when I was told there's only a few minutes left in the game. I was careful not to show my real emotions because the score was still a tie, with no obvious side triumphing the other. I took a quick glance at Airi, she looked exhausted but still trying so so hard. But her stare turn deadly. Why? And she's looking right into my eyes. I look around to see if she is actually staring at someone near me, but there isn't anyone else. Instead, THE BALL IS RIGHT AT MY FEET! Everyone is running towards me, literally. I hear her shouting for me to score a goal. The timer is already counting down. I have no time to lose. All I can do is to kick the ball towards the goal. I focused my mind and look for an open path and I went straight for it. I ran in a speed like never before and I manage to dodge a few players. I hear the crowd screaming, roaring and GOALLL!! Yes I did it!!! I have kicked the ball decisively into the goalpost  and the goalkeeper is just too stunned to react. I turn around and see the crowd and the players in overwhelming emotions. My team is running towards me, in happiness? It should be? But it didn't look like at all. Airi especially was flushed in anger. 

"Airi..."

"SUZUKI HIKARI! you had only one job and you had to screw it up?! I rather you not do anything!" She shouted at me until the opponents from the other school came over. 

"Airi, you could have just withdrawn if you didn't have enough players. That way you wouldn't need to suffer such embarrassment." The girls behind this narcissist all laughed along. Still, I'm confused what I had done wrong.

"Pfft... scoring into the wrong goal. Thanks noob" the other team gave me a light pat and a smile before walking off proudly. Gosh, no wonder our team is so angry. I really felt like digging a hole and hiding myself in it. Yuto must be angry too that I didn't follow through his advice. Relationships is for sure broken between me and the class, but my danger is far from ending.

"Ahhhhh! Hikari, I swear I'll kill you!" Airi raised her arm. Then I heard a piercing whistle sound that caught everyone's attention and got them turning on their backs. 

"Chinen?" I noticed him blowing the whistle at the far end, then at the same time, I feel a tight grip in my wrist. I expect to see Yabu who always appears at crucial time to help clear my mess, I was wrong. Taking my hand and running away for the field, I  have wanted to struggle out of his restrain and demand answers. Yet when I see the angry mob behind me, I guess I really don't have much choice but follow obediently. My only wish while running for my life is if he could slow down. I am breathless by the time we reach outside the school, by a continuous path beside a lake. He lets go off my hand and crashes onto the grass patch facing the lake, with no intention to explain why he did what he did. I take a closer look and albeit I only had one or two close interactions with him, I recognise him by his sharp features. "Yamada Ryosuke-kun..."

Lying on his arms behind his head, he said, "it's a dangerous move you made Hikari..."

"I didn't mean to..." I run to a spot beside him. He sits up then asked, "why did you even volunteer if can't play at all?"

"H-how did you know?" I spoke out my thoughts. I swear I didn't and have never admitted this to anyone but Yuto. Yet he said in such confidence.

"It's not too difficult to guess. First you are desperately escaping from the ball as if it has some contagious bug. Second, you scored into the wrong goal and still not know it. I was observing you ya know."

Ashamed, I had to admit. My head lowered instinctively. 

"When Airi first told me about it, I was taken aback. But I guess I was being awfully judgemental cause you just didn't look like a soccer player or any other sports in that matter. Turn out I was right."

His mellow voice didn't help ease the passive aggressive words he spoke. I deserved it though so there's no reason to react to it. Whatever he said was right. He saw through my policy. How am I gonna face the class, I officially cause an irreparable damage to the friendship i yearn to have. I should just stop trying.

"All I wanted was to make friends... why is it so hard..." I said to myself. But what's so funny with my remark that Ryosuke erupted in laughter. It wasn't even a sarcastic laughter, it was hysteric laughter.

"Just to make friends, you sign up for something you didn't know?... i mean that's hard on you and totally not worth the struggle" 

"It matters to me that I befriend the class! You don't know how alone I feel" I raised my voice alittle, frustrated by his ignorance of my concerns. It's genuine, that's why I am offended by his lack of seriousness. But who am I kidding, I have no rights to even be angry at anyone. "Sorry... I think Airi and the rest won't be even talking to me."

I see his eyes unwavering, piercing into mine, like he is thinking hard or he is pondering how he should put it in words. I am nervous by his alluring glare yet shudder at the same time. My face feels hot like it is a natural homeostatic reaction.

"I'll speak to Airi. She won't blame it on you."

"She won't?"

"Well, don't underestimate the power of the soccer president."

"Heh?!!! You are..."

"You are really a confused girl, ne..." he lightly pressed on my head then stood up and did a stretch that boast his defined forearms. My eyes fixed on his back as he paced nearer to the lake.

"I only need you to promise me one thing..."

"Yes? Anything."

"Don't play soccer again" he turn to me in a wide smile, then stretched out his hand to me. I look at him blankly until he seems his patience is running out with my stupidity. He took my hands and shook it. "Here, we are friends now"

How can anyone be so warm when I nearly cost the downfall of his team. With all my guilt, i heavily accepted his handshake and gradually bear a smile. 

"Oi Ryosuke!" 

It's Chinen rushing towards us. His eyes widdened when he saw me beside Ryosuke.

"You're here? Seriously, the mess you caused back there" 

His statement only indicates that the ruckus I caused has yet to resolve and the situation has only worsened.

"I'll fix it, Chinen. But Hikari, don't you have something to say to Chinen too? About why you join the soccer team..." Ryosuke re-evoked interest in my embarrassing reason.

"Why?" 

"... i... wanted friends."

"Are you kidding me?" Chinen's reaction appeared alot more tamed but it also meant angst too. He seems to take offence to such frivolous reason. Yet Ryosuke didn't seem to care these non-verbal cues and insist I ask him that question.

"...can i..." i stretched out my whimpering hands and scrambled with my vocabulary to form the supposedly elementary sentence. "... i... be your friend?"

Dumfounded - the word to describe Chinen's expression. I lost track of how long my hand remained in midair until he finally, but uncertainly shook it with a awkward smile, Nothing like his normal sunshine. 

"Now you have 2 friends so don't think too much and don't do unnecessary things like this anymore. Even if it's out of goodwill, you can end up messing things up for the other party. All you could have done is to just state upfront what you want. No one would know your intentions of making friends if you keep to yourself ne." Ryosuke pat my shoulders before walking off with Chinen, leaving me behind trying to reconcile what has just happened. It's unbelievable. It's a miracle, and I aren't even sure if I should even celebrate over it. But Ryosuke and Yabu are right, if I keep to myself, I won't make any friends. What I could do now is to trust that Ryosuke can really talk Airi to forgiving me but I was sure that'll only be the start of more challenges. 

***

Shohei POV 

I was standing at a corner, out of sight from Yuto and Yabu, quietly listening in their conversation. It wasn't out of a malicious intent but more of curiosity with a hint of amuse by their mutual bickering. I did expect Hikari's mess to happen about the second day or even sooner but it didn't expect it to be so hilarious. Volunteering for something she know nuts and without realising she actually signed up for an interschool competition. The best part had to be the scoring in the wrong goalpost. I salute Yabu for completely maintaining his role as a bystander, and his ignorance is for a good cause after all. Hikari seems to have gone through alot in a single day and I am sure she learnt from her fall today. 

"Guys guys, no need to get heated over this." I decide to step in when I hear both sides raising their voices.

"Blame me for all you want. I don't regret giving her any advice even if you are my superior" Yuto was completely annoyed when he made his point to Yabu. The latter wasn't pleased by his rebuttal.

"Look what's your advice done. You're causing more problems"

"Seriously, at least I was there for her when she needed help. You, are just heartless! Leaving her in the lurch."

"Hey hey hey chill man" I went in between the 2. I could feel a virtual heat wave emitting from both sides and their stern glances that pierce. 

"Yuto, he is your superior so you can't disrespect him. And Yabu, there's no need to reprimand Yuto. Even if he did not give his advice, we all know that Hikari will still mess it up somehow. Actually I'm glad you two work differently. Hikari needs a stringent figure like Yabu and at the same time, she needs someone she can turn to when she's troubled. Yuto is that person cause you two are like same aged siblings"

"Well, if you put it that way, we have nothing to say, ne Yabu" Yuto looks at the older one with his puppy-dog eyes, as if trying to seek forgiveness from Yabu. Yabu is intently holding back his laughter and it's quite hilarious but he is the kind who puts up a strong front. As long as Yuto could see him relenting, it's a happy ending. 

"So now she has 2 friends? The Ryosuke and Chinen kids?" I asked.

"You make them sound like objects though, but yes, they are... if you are worried, Yabu already done a check on them "

"Their records are good. Shall not be complacent so we will continue to keep an eye on her" Yabu added.

"Thanks. That will do for now. Iwata is also closely monitoring. We can't afford any hiccups before coronation." I addressed before exiting. Trailing off to the garden which I thought would be a good way to destress after a long day of work, not realising the tranquility of that very peaceful green pastures with the trickling sounds of the stream has already been disrupted. A long girl sat by the stream, her knees tugged close to her body and her head buried between the space. I could hear faint sobbing sounds coming from her direction and figure she's not having the best of time too. I thought I should curb my curiosity and walk away silently to give the poor girl her space, but I had to break a twig under my feet. It is deafening in such circumstances. She turned to my direction and then I realise, she is Mirei. She quickly hid her face but I could see she is actually hiding her tears instead. Wiping them off, she springs up on her feet. Still in her distraught, she never forget her curtsy.

"Miura-sama... w-what are you doing here so late into the night?"

"Taking a slow stroll back to my chambers. But I reckon you should go back and rest too. The night is really not that young now" 

"I'm okay, Miura-sama..." she propped back to her seat on the patch of grass and seem to have went back to her trance. I feel rejected though really her reaction is nothing worth my concern. I sat beside her and yet she got such a shock like I was some apparition.

"Just thinking maybe I need some fresh air too... but I think talking to someone about what's troubling will work better than just taking in fresh air." 

She look at me with confused eyes like I said something completely incomprehensible. Then, I thought she just shrugged me off with a mere shake of her head, but she added with what got me pondering what could have happened to her.

"Someone just reminded me, that I'm really just a nurse." She sounds discouraged, defeated in this world of endless complexity.

"And what's wrong with that? Being able to do what you like is nothing to be ashamed off isn't it? To be forced to do something you don't like, that should be the real misfortune." 

"You don't like your role?"

"Not me..." I hesitated to answer but somehow I feel I can share with her, "it's just that there's someone I know, trying so hard to fit into what we may all agree isn't the best shoes for her. This fallacy we create for this person, will eventually tire us all out and yet we don't know what kind of outcome we will get at the end. And for this person, she cannot ever get out of this fallacy we created or she probably won't survive. It's an ordeal in so many folds."

"Crown Princess?"

I kept my silence and she gets my hint. I diverted the topic back to where we began though I strangely cannot recall how it ended with me revealing more than probing hers. I figure it's that harmless aura she gives. I failed to have my curiosity satisfied cause her lips on the contrary is quite sealed. All I know is that someone probably has tried to put her down, undermining her capabilities. 

"Miura-sama, can I ask you something?"

"Yes?" 

She sounded serious when we are about to part ways back to our chambers. Not just serious, she appeared nervous, tense. Raising my expectations of something important she will break, she disappoints me with her hesitation and eventual withdrawal. That's another thing I dislike from girls. It's alright to feel shy around guys (because guys are too) but if that shyness interferes with interactions or make any conversations so slow and wishy-washy, I rather not take any initiative for engagement. But as I walk back alone, my mind drifted back to her. One thing I remembered from earlier was that she's normally soft spoken but the calmness of the night actually resonated better with her than the hyper mornings, and her sweet voice was clearly audible. If She couldn't quite leave an impression before, I am now tickled by her colourful character. If only she's less introverted.