do you love me - luna ft. george

    it's not love at first sight; far from it, in fact. their first meeting is a little awkward. nayeon had just moved from korea and her english wasn't very good. mina had picked up some korean from her friends but she had always been too shy to ever speak in full sentences. but she tries anyway, because she knows what it's like to be in nayeon's position.
"hi," she says shyly, "i'm mina."
nayeon smiles, "are you korean?"
mina blushes, "no actually, i'm japanese."
"oh okay," nayeon smiles, still.
mina clears , "which part of korea are you from?"
"seoul."
"ah."
and the conversation ends there. when mina gets home she screams into her pillow, regretting her awkwardness. but nayeon still smiles at her the next day, says hi and all that. so maybe it wasn't that bad.

    it feels like there's a small distance between the two of them. mina can't seem to bridge the gap. sometimes it feels like she's shouting across a rushing river. but nayeon doesn’t seem to notice. there's a smile that she has, always soft and understanding. so mina shouts across the river. ignores the rushing water. focuses on nayeon's voice instead. and nayeon smiles all the while. 

    nayeon's presence falls into place with the rest of the group easily. she laughs with jeongyeon and jihyo. leans against chayeoung and watches her draw. dances around like a fool with sana and momo. links arms with chaeyoung and dahyun as they drag her around. shares her earphones with tzuyu. and mina wonders. wonders when she will have a place beside nayeon. but nayeon still smiles at her the same way. and it's burdensome sometimes.
"what?" mina asks one day, when nayeon just smiles at her and says nothing.
"nothing."
mina pouts, "it's not nothing."
nayeon grins, "you're cute."
mina feels her cheeks warm, "shut up."
and nayeon smiles. mina has a foot in the river, almost ready to cross. and nayeon holds her hand out, ready to meet her.

    "make sure you're free on sunday, it's nayeon's birthday and we're going to have a party at hers,” jeongyeon says, nudging mina's shoulder.
mina contemplates not going. but she goes anyway. and it's not that bad. it's fun. it's nice. it's great. seeing her friends laugh and smile together makes something warm bloom in her chest. and nayeon's little sister is cute. so mina lets herself go. lets herself be a little childish for a bit, doesn't worry about the eyes of others. she laughs a little louder, says whatever comes to mind. has an edamame eating competition with nayeon's sister. and then she finds herself in nayeon's room with jeongyeon and sana and nayeon. spots the guitar in the corner. asks if she can play for bit.
"i like people who can play guitar," says nayeon.
mina isn't that great at guitar, but she isn't that bad, either. 
at least, she's good enough that nayeon says to her, later, when it's just the two of them lying on nayeon's bed, "i think i like you."
and she smiles. the water isn't rushing anymore. it trickles past and mina realises the river isn't that deep. and she's closer than she thinks. but she doesn't say anything. just laughs. it doesn't seem like nayeon is looking for a reply. she just looks at mina with that same soft look that she always has. and she smiles.
"you are so cute.”

    nayeon's hands are soft. and her arms are warm. soon mina finds herself, more often than not, lost in the comfort of nayeon's hold. nayeon has come to meet her. but still she stands in the river. not sure whether to step out or to let herself drift away. but they have time. and nayeon's hold is firm and gentle. there is no pressure. she leans back into nayeon's shoulder. nayeon quietly buries her face into mina's hair.
and she whispers, in korean, "i like you."
her voice is low and soft and bare and intimate. mina doesn't have an answer yet. but still, there is no pressure.

    sometimes it feels like she is waiting. waiting for the water to rush and the waves to swell. waiting to be swept away. but the stream is steady.
and nayeon still tells her everyday, "i like you." 
mina thinks she could feel the same way. especially when nayeon looks right into her eyes and smiles without saying a word. it always makes mina blush. and that always makes nayeon laugh. 
and mina will ask, "why do you hate me?"
and nayeon will shake her head and squeeze mina's hand and laugh, "i like you."
and then one day she starts saying, "i love you."
and then.

    mina feels like she is almost ready to step onto nayeon's bank. all she needs is a little tug. and as everyone does when they have waited a little too long, nayeon gets impatient. there are only so many unanswered i love you's a person can take before their heart begins to break. so nayeon gives her a little tug. she looks into mina's eyes. and mina looks back at her. and she leans in. the moment is over almost as soon as it happens.
"what was that?" mina asks.
"what?" nayeon acts like nothing happened. 
it's the tug that mina needs. all she has to do is decide if she'll let go and let herself be swept into the sea or if she'll hold on and let herself fall into nayeon. and she lets herself fall. it doesn't take much for her to press her lips onto nayeon's again; doesn't take much for her to thread her fingers in between nayeon's; doesn't take much for their breaths and heartbeats to synchronise. the way mina drags her thumb over her cheek as they kiss, the way everything happens slowly, without rush, without urgency; it's enough of an answer for nayeon. but it still wouldn't hurt to hear it out loud.
"i love you," nayeon breathes into what little space there is between them.
mina sighs and presses against nayeon's mouth with a tenderness that threatens to shake the world. and nayeon hears the words that have been waiting on the edge her lips for an eternity.

_____________________________
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhello
writing is hard
but its okay we all die anyway B)