...because of a bleak past.
Tangled in Your Heartstrings
"That will be ₩30,000," Sowon smiled at the customer who just had bought dresses from their store. She carefully placed the items inside a paper bag before taking the credit card of the customer.
"Thank you and come again," she remarked before the customer left. The person next in line handed out a pair of pants that he was going to purchase.
"Good morning, welco--" Sowon's greeting was interrupted when she realized who was the person in front of her. Her eyes widened at the sight of Dr. Choi, sans his long white coat, stethoscope, and metal clipboard.
"Oh, I didn't know you work here!" he smiled widely, "Hi!"
"Um, h--hi," Sowon answered nervously. She was pretty uncomfortable about Dr. Choi seeing her at work; she felt bad about admitting it, but she found her work as a department store cashier as unappealing, something glamorous women would not want to end up as their career.
Sowon lowered her head as she scanned the item and placed it inside a paper bag. She slowly held it out to Dr. Choi, before speaking, "That will be ₩24,000."
"Are you free tonight?" was Dr. Choi's response, before giving her the money for his purchase.
"I received ₩25,000," Sowon spoke like she did not hear a thing. She just opened the cash register to get his change, "Here is your ₩1,000," she placed the paper bills on the counter for Dr. Choi to get, "Thank you for shopping."
Dr. Choi tilted his head. He was quite confused with Sowon's glum expression; also, she was avoiding eye contact and was acting like they had not met before. She seemed like a totally different person.
"Um, are you alright?" he asked.
Sowon just nodded as a response.
"Ah, I'm wondering if," even he could already feel the awkward atmosphere between them, "If you are free tonight?"
Sowon gave him a glare, "For what?"
"Um, I am wondering if we could go and eat together, in the night food market."
Sowon froze for a few seconds. She was already wondering why Dr. Choi would invite her to go back to the night market again. Yes, their first trip together at the night market went well, but she was not really expecting that it would be the first thing Dr. Choi would mention after seeing her that she only worked as a cashier. As someone who always had an unproductive attempt at finding love, she was doubting if he was actually being honest or was just trying to trick her.
Dr. Choi just stood in front of her, waiting for her response. Sowon indeed looked doubtful, but he was still hoping that she would agree, since they had a good experience the last time they went there.
The seconds of thinking felt like hours for Sowon. Her heart wanted to say yes, but her mind was telling her not to go because she had been hurt a lot of times before.
When was the last time she went out with a man? It was a week or two ago, when her blind date went amiss. She went with a businessman who was almost in his 30s, had good reputation and had an attractive set of eyes. Everything was going well at first, the man being all nice and sweet to her, until they finished dinner and when she asked about when they could see each other again, he blatantly expressed that he did not like her because he wanted shorter and cuter girls.
Months before that blind date, she also joined a group date organized by her high school friends. They went to a bar to meet up with guys one of her friends met at a dating site. Sowon got paired with a magazine writer--a decent man who had the built of a model and smelled like musk. Everything was going well at first, until the man got drunk and told her straight up that she was too tall to be his ideal girlfriend.
Aside from those two experiences, Sowon already had a lot of futile encounters with men in different settings. And men would always reject her either because she was "too tall" or because she did not "suit the ideal type".
At that moment, another man was asking her out. Dr. Choi seemed nice, but what would make him different from the other men? They are all the same, Sowon thought to herself.
"Um, I'm sorry, Dr. Choi," she finally spoke, "But, um, I'm pretty busy today. I can't go to the night market. I'm sorry."
"Ah, I see," Dr. Choi forced a smile before scratching his head, "Um, yeah, you are probably busy with work. I'm sorry for sounding inconsiderate."
Sowon felt guilty for lying, but her mind was telling her that it was for the better, "I'm sorry, and it's okay. Don't feel bad about it," she took a quick glance at
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