Title: Thriller
Prompt-#: 169
For: sweetmoon
Pairing: Minho/Key (slight Onew/Taemin)
Author: Anonymous until reveals
Word Count: 11,070
Rating: T
Warnings: Major character death, horror elements, violence, blood, mentions of transphobic/queerphobic bullying, one instance of misgendering a trans character, implied abuse, swearing
Summary: Minho’s a high school kid who’s just looking forward to getting out of his math class for the weekend. Key’s an escapee from a government lab who’s just looking for somewhere to be safe. Neither of them planned for this. (Stranger Things AU)

(why did you wait so long?

you knew what you were doing, dont deny that. you might be young and naïve and sheltered, but you knew what it mean to take someones life. you knew what it meant to reach inside your own mind and pull out something that didnt belong to you.

and you knew the moment you saw that cold skin and those dead eyes and you felt that rage and fear and pain, you knew that was you. you had done that.

then why did you wait?

why now, why only after this security breach, after pushing so far you can never hope to fix it? why not last night, why not the night before that or the night before that or the night before that, any of the eleven nights you spent staring up through the ventilation pipe?

that grate separating you and the pipe system might be too much for your hands, but it was never too much for your mind, and you knew that.

and now the grates just a twisted sheet of metal at your feet. the sirens are blaring, loud and red and angry no matter what you do now. the key card you stole all those nights ago burns beneath your shirt, rattling against your ribcage, and still youre hesitating?

the metal of the grate is cold against your hands, your knees, the balls of your feet. its achingly dark, but youve had the interior of the facility mapped onto the inside of your brain for as long as you can remember. could have put it to use years ago, if you had just tried.

the hallway you drop down into is deserted. the alarms arent screaming to anyone but you, and you cant be bothered.

the key card rattles under your shirt again as you turn. you know it will unlock the back door, and after that…?

after that who knows. maybe woods, maybe fences, definitely more security, but god, its nothing you havent dealt with before. and theres nothing behind you but more practice sessions with more nameless scientists. 

the door slides open silently and you dash through it, grateful that you didnt have to force it open. your head is still spinning from tearing the grate off earlier and right now you need to focus on running. the grass feels strange and textured under your feet, but you can still hear the sirens blaring in the distance. 

the fence is taller than you thought it would be--they really spared no expense in keeping you locked inside. they didnt know how strong youd be when you finally worked up the courage, though.

the chain link of the fence bends away like its nothing. all you have to do is step through, keep running through the trees until theyve lost sight of you. 

but youre still standing there, one hand curled in the fence, head turned back towards the distant scream of the sirens. what happens after this? what kind of life could there possibly be for you out there? theres a whole world of people out there who have no idea something like you could exist, and theres no guarantee that theyre going to help you. 

theres no guarantee you wont die in this sick science experiment, either.

so what the hell are you waiting for?

run.) 

•

Minho’s pretty sure if he has to solve for the third side of one more triangle his eyes are going to fall out of his head. He turns to mouth I’m dying at Taeyeon a few seats behind him, but she’s got her nose buried in her workbook, scribbling away furiously.

A glance back at the clock tells him there’s only ten minutes of class left. Not nearly enough time for any of these triangles to start making sense, so Minho busies himself with scratching a doodle into the corner of his desk, right next to where some long-gone senior had carved the word HELL.

The bell rings eleven minutes later (clocks must be wrong again) and Minho shoots out of his seat, books already gathered up in his arms. Taeyeon catches up to him at the door, still trying to balance her books in one arm. “Are you coming over?” he asks her as she slides gratefully through the door he holds open for her. 

Taeyeon shrugs as they turn down the hallway where the juniors keep their things. “Is Eunsook coming over?” 

“What, you can’t just hang out with me?” 

“Definitely not,” Taeyeon says with a grin, stopping in front of her locker. “But yeah, I’ll come over. I wanna get my X-Men 173 back from you before you forget.”

“I wasn’t going to forget!” Minho says, shouldering his locker door open a few doors down from her. “It just took me a while to read. With school and everything.”

Taeyeon rolls her eyes. “It’s a comic book, it can’t possibly take you more than a half--”

“Taemin!”

Taeyeon breaks off, eyes focused on something over Minho’s head. He barely has time to turn and see who’s bothering her before a hand slams into the lockers between the two of them. 

Minho doesn’t recognize the boy who leans heavily against the lockers (he’s pretty sure he’d remember that bleached hair) or any of the kids he’s got trailing behind him, but Taeyeon obviously does. She ducks her head again, leaning into her locker as if trying to shield herself, and there’s a way this usually goes. They’re going to call her names, dump out her locker, maybe push her around, and Minho’s either going to have to risk suspension (again) or just wait till it’s over and he can help Taeyeon pick up her books. 

But before he can make a decision, someone else calls out “Tae! Minho!” and everyone turns to where Eunsook and Jonghyun are just turning the corner into the hallway, Eunsook’s wearing her leather jacket again, and Jonghyun with his boots on is almost tall enough to make them both look bigger and older. 

Eunsook doesn’t miss a beat--she steps effortlessly through the crowd of underclassmen, not even glancing at the kid with the bleached hair. “Are you ready to go, Tae?” she asks with a grin. Jonghyun follows close behind her, hands in his pockets. 

Taeyeon blinks up at Eunsook, stunned for a moment. “Oh--yeah,” she says finally, 

It’s ridiculous, to Minho, but it works. The underclassmen all know that Eunsook sneaks out of the cafeteria to smoke behind the pool, and that she and Jonghyun cut class together, and that’s enough to set up their reputation as the scary seniors. They don’t know that Jonghyun can’t even yell at his puppy and Eunsook’s the gentlest person Minho knows--they just slink off down the hallway with a sidelong glare back at Taeyeon. One of them knocks into her as he passes, but Jonghyun gives him a pointed look and he hurries off after the others. 

“Let’s get out of here,” Minho says, slamming his locker door shut. Taeyeon nods, eyes still lowered, but she follows the rest of them out. 

The group is mostly silent as they leave the school and head down one of the many side-streets that leads to Minho’s corner of the suburbs. Jonghyun and Eunsook make a few comments about their classes and teachers and tests, and Minho tries to get Taeyeon to talk about the X-Men issue that she loaned him, but she doesn’t really take the bait. It’s not till they turn down Elm Street, leaving behind most of the other students walking home, that she speaks up. 

“Did you hear what that kid called me?” she says quietly, shoes scuffing against the uneven asphalt of the sidewalk. 

Minho’s face falls. “Taeyeon…” he starts, unsure what to say. Sorry I didn’t punch him out for you? On Taeyeon’s other side, Eunsook, who’s already removed her leather jacket, moves to drape it over Taeyeon’s shoulders. 

“Maybe I should cut my hair again,” Taeyeon says, but she accepts the coat gratefully, pulling the sleeves in around her. “They all still think I’m a boy anyway, so—“

“Your hair looks pretty like that,” Jonghyun cuts in, and Minho makes a small noise of agreement. “It’s not your hair’s fault that everyone at school is a complete .”

It’s fleeting, but Taeyeon smiles at that. “My mom wants me to cut it, though,” she persists. 

“Well, it’s not your mom’s hair,” Minho says, “So she can--”

“Wait.” 

Eunsook stops on the sidewalk, head turned towards the woods lining one side of the street. “Did you guys hear that?” 

“Hear what?” Jonghyun says, but Minho’s pretty sure he heard it to--the sound of something moving through the trees, something much bigger than the usual squirrel or bird or even the turkeys that sometimes poke around Minho’s yard. And something coming much faster. 

“What the--”

Something bursts out of the trees not five feet from where Minho’s standing, and everyone jumps back as a young person, shaved head, dressed in what looks like a hospital gown, stumbles out onto the street. They slip on the edge of the sidewalk and have to stop to catch themself, blinking around at the crowd of high schoolers surveying them. 

A long moment of silence hangs between them. The person hesitates, as if they aren’t sure whether they can run from four scrawny high schoolers. 

Minho’s the first one to break. “What the hell just happened.” 

“Um,” Jonghyun starts, hesitating beside Taeyeon like he’s not sure if the person’s safe to approach. “Who are you?”


“Jonghyun…” Taeyeon says warily. 

“What? They might be hurt or something!” Jonghyun says, gesturing towards the person. They immediately jump back, startled by his sudden movement. “Oh, uh. Sorry.” 

They remain silent, eyes darting between the four of them as if they’re ready to run at a moment’s notice. But Jonghyun’s probably right, Minho thinks, taking in their bare feet and the dirt smeared across the front of their gown. “Where did you come from?” Minho asks. “The hospital?” 

The person just stares at him.

“Do you need help?” Jonghyun asks. They fix him with a long stare, long enough that both Jonghyun and Taeyeon step back warily, but finally they give a tiny nod. 

“Well…” Eunsook tries. “Can you tell us your name?” 

“Key,” Jonghyun says. Everyone turns to look at him. “It says Key on their name tag thing,” he clarifies, pointing to the lanyard around the person’s neck. 

“...it’s a key card. It says “key card” on it,” Taeyeon deadpans. 

“I know that,” Jonghyun says. “But we can’t call them Key Card, that’s the worst name ever.”

“But Key is a better name?” 

“Hey, guys?” Minho breaks in. His eyes are trained on the person--on Key, he’s already calling them in his head. They’re twisting their gown between their hands nervously now. “Maybe we shouldn’t be talking about this right now? In the middle of the street?” 

Key glances over at him, wide eyed, but they look away again almost as quickly, twisting their gown. 

“Minho’s right,” Eunsook cuts in. She starts forward, but stops again when Key shrinks back from her hastily. “Do you want to come with us?” she asks. “We can get you real clothes, and then you can call your parents--”

“No!”


The outburst startles everyone, even Key. It’s the first time they’ve spoken.

“...okay,” she says after a moment (but not without a fleeting sidelong glance to Jonghyun that Minho intercepts). “But at least let us take you somewhere safer.” 

“We can take them to my house,” Minho says. Key’s eyes flit up towards him again, then back down to their feet. “My parents aren’t home yet, so we can figure out what to do with them.” Part of Minho is telling him that they should just go to his parents, should let them sort the whole thing out. But he can see the fear in Key’s eyes, and they still look as if they might make a run for it, and a deeper part of him just wants to protect them from whatever it is they’re so afraid of.

He’s met with silence, but no one seems to disagree with the idea. Taeyeon looks uncertain, but she lets Eunsook take the jacket back from her shoulders and wrap it around Key instead. They flinch from the contact initially, but they still accept it as Taeyeon had. They’re so thin the fabric practically drowns them, and Minho feels his heart clench for them. 

“Let’s go,” Jonghyun says, glancing back at the copse of trees Key had burst out from. Minho’s walked past them a million times--has lived in the same house his entire life--but for the first time something about them seems...strange. Darker, somehow. “Before anyone else sees us.”

•

(youre not quite sure how you got from running for your life through the woods to sitting on a pile of blankets, draped in a cable-knit sweater that hangs over your thin frame. maybe this wasnt the best idea, dragging more people into the mess youve no doubt already created. but they were right--you do need help, youre not going to survive very long out here with no one to show you how.

the house they brought you to is big, you think, and neat, full of afternoon light and space. its clean, but not in the way your old room was, not sterile. theres still evidence that people live here--real people, people who lead lives so far removed from your own you dont know how to imagine it outside of the books youve read, ones about families who live in cozy suburban houses and have the kind of problems that bring them closer together in the end.

but they push you quickly through the first few rooms, up the stairs to a much smaller and much more cluttered room. theres a bed in one corner, lifted high off the ground with a space underneath for blankets and pillows and a box overflowing with books youve never seen before, and this is where they lead you, urging you to sit in the little nest of blankets. 

and then theres a pause, like no one really knows what to do with you know that youre here. its a feeling you recognize easily enough, and soon theyre all making excuses to leave the room--we should get them some food, we forgot to lock the front door, we should get a first aid kid--until youre left alone there with minho.

the one who gave you her coat introduced everyone as you walked. eunsook, she said, gesturing to herself with a smile that you still cant yet get a read on. jonghyun is the boy with the dyed hair, and looking at him makes you self-conscious of your own shaved head in a way you hadnt known you could be. 

but its nothing to how taeyeon makes you feel. taeyeon is the name of the other girl, the one who seems scared to look you in the eye, the one who keeps her distance. eunsook hesitated when she introduced taeyeon, something passing between them that you’ve never seen before, but it felt--it still feels--like the nervous glances before you were asked to travel just a bit further into the dark, push a little bit harder, pull something out thats just a little bit darker.

you can tell them, taeyeon said, but the idea clearly bothered her. theres something in her that doesnt trust you, you know, and can you really blame her? you shrink further into the jacket eunsook gave you.

we call her tae, around other people, says eunsook, but her name is taeyeon. and you have to call her her, okay?

you dont really understand why you wouldnt, but youre not sure how to ask about that or whether you even can. its clear enough that theres something about you--about having you there--that she doesnt like. 

sorry the sweater doesnt really fit, minho says. minho at least seems to like you. or at least, he pities you. 

its too big on me too, he says, shuffling his feet like he doesnt really know what to do with them. you cant say you blame him, not when youre not sure what youre supposed to do now either. youre here, you made it out, but for how long? how long can you stay in this house before you ruin that too, before one of the scientists or--or something worse comes looking for you? 

are you hungry? minho asks, stepping closer, but slowly, like hes still afraid youll run away. you are, but you arent thinking about that right now. youre thinking about what happens if instead of you it finds one of them. if it finds minho. if the only person in your life whos been nice to you ends up paying for all of this.

is that a no? minho asks. it jolts you out of your thoughts, and you shake your head quickly, hoping he takes that to mean you do, in fact, want food. youre not sure how long its been since you last ate.

eunsook chooses that moment to reenter the room, and you wonder if maybe she was waiting outside the door the whole time. shes got two bowls of something you dont recognize and something else under her arm that looks shiny and flimsy and weird. 

minho looks up at her and snorts through his nose. spaghettios? he asks. Really?

i didnt want to go through all your parents food, she says, bending forward to set the bowls on the floor so she can sit cross-legged across from you. this ones for you, she says, pushing the larger of the two bowls towards you.

are the rest of us supposed to share one bowl? jonghyun asks. you didnt see him come in, but hes carrying an open box of bandages and pill bottles. 

shut up, they probably need the food more than the rest of us, eunsook says, her tone still as good natured as its been this whole time. 

you look down at the bowl in front of you. its full of some suspicious red liquid with little rings that do, as minho said, look like little Os. you take the spoon hesitantly and scoop up a few of the rings. eunsook and minho are watching you closely while jonghyun rifles through the box, trying to read the faded labels. 

the spaghettios are mushy and warm in your mouth, and its weird for a moment before the flavor hits you. its stronger than anything youre used to getting but also a thousand times better, and before you can stop yourself youre wolfing down the whole bowl, foregoing the spoon in favor of just tipping it into your mouth. 

someone laughs, and you peer around the side of the bowl to catch sight of minho smiling at you. the way he looks at you, its the same way you were always looked at when you successfully reached inside yourself and touched that awful thing, or when you were able to toss and object across the room. and youre not sure what to make of this. all you did was eat the spaghettios. 

eunsook is smiling at you, too, but its that reserved smile she always seems to have. not the same as minhos smile, and definitely not the same as how she smiles at taeyeon. do you want more? she asks, holding out the second bowl of spaghettios for you. 

as youre downing that one just as quickly--it really is good--taeyeon comes back into the room. she keeps her distance again, hovering near the doorframe. 

so what are we going to do with them? she asks, nodding her head towards you. 

you see minho falter, see eunsook and jonghyun exchange glances. youve only known these people a few hours and already youre burdening them, but when eunsook says we should probably call the hospital or something you feel your blood run cold. 

you cant go back. you dont care what it takes now, but you cant go back to that place. just the suggestion of those cold concrete walls and all those scientists who have the same face in your mind is twisting something sharp and cold inside you and god, you hate it. minho seems to notice something is wrong, but the others are focused on eunsook now. 

i know they dont want us to, but maybe we should talk to minhos parents? jonghyun says. i mean, they were obviously running away from something, but we cant just hide them in here forever. and taeyeons nodding, agreeing with him, and even minho seems convinced that a phone call needs to be made, and you just can’t--

the bedroom door slams shut so violently everyone jumps, including you, and it takes a moment for you to realize it was you that had done it. minhos eyes flick between you and the door, and maybe hes already put it together, but youre not done yet. the desk in the corner of the room shoots forward, screeches to a stop in front of the door so none of them can open it. 

no, you force yourself to say, and it comes out more quietly than you wanted so you say it again--no. no, theyre not going to call anyone. no, theyre not going to tell anyones parents, or anyone else who might be able to find out where you came from. and no, no, youre definitely not going back.

what the , whispers taeyeon.)

•

It was obvious, in retrospect, that there was something weird about Key. Because, well, young barefoot people don’t usually just show up out of the woods unable to speak and asking for help. At least, Minho figures they don’t. 

But after watching his entire desk push itself across the floor and barricade them inside the room, Minho has to admit he’s a bit shaken. He’s not the only one--he can see Key’s hands are shaking, too, and they’re breathing hard as if they had pushed the desk themself. 

“What. The ,” Taeyeon repeats, leaning heavily against the wall by the desk. 

“That was…” Jonghyun starts, falters, ignoring the fact that he’s dropped the first aid kid. “What was that?” 

“I’m pretty sure that’s telekinesis,” Taeyeon says. “Oh my god. They’re like ing Jean Grey.” 

“Seriously? You’re going to talk about X-Men right now?” Eunsook says, and in spite of everything, Minho has to laugh at that. 

“I’m sorry, I guess I’m in shock. What else would you compare it to?” Taeyeon shoots back. “We found an X-Man in the woods, and--oh my god, what if they turn evil on us?”

“Taeyeon,” Eunsook says firmly. “They’re telekinetic. They probably would have killed us by now or something.” Minho’s pretty sure Key doesn’t want to kill anything, but when he glances over to make sure that’s true, he realizes they have a more pressing concern.

“Hey, guys?” Minho says, breaking up Taeyeon and Eunsook’s nerd fight. “Key’s bleeding.” 

Their nose is bleeding, to be exact. The blood has dripped down over their lip, but they didn’t seem to notice until Minho said anything, eyes a little unfocused and turned down towards their feet. They bring a hand up to wipe at the blood, blinking slowly. 

Jonghyun jumps to his feet again, apparently grateful to have something to do. He pulls out a roll of gauze and tears some off, bending towards Key’s face with it, but they jump back, swaying slightly as they lean away from him. Their eyes are locked on Minho now, and he realizes with a jolt that they’re looking to him for some kind of guidance. 

“It’s okay,” he says, nodding at Key in spite of the fear in their eyes. “He won’t hurt you. He’s just gonna clean up your nose.” Minho can feel Taeyeon’s eyes on him from across the room, but he doesn’t look away from Key until they nod back at him, sitting up again so Jonghyun can press the gauze to their nose. 

“I guess they like you more than us,” Taeyeon says. 

Minho shrugs; most of his concentration is still focused on Key and Jonghyun (hold it over your nose like this, and tip your head back, okay? yeah, like that). “I guess. I mean, I am the one housing them.” 

“Are you going to keep them here, after that?” Taeyeon asks, gesturing back towards the door. 

“After that I don’t think we have a choice, Taeyeon,” Eunsook says softly. “They obviously don’t want us to do anything else.” 

Taeyeon frowns. It’s clear she doesn’t like this--she’s never liked keeping secrets, ironically, and Minho can tell this is bothering her a lot more than just lying about staying over at a friend’s house on Friday nights or being back home by 8 P.M. And he can’t say he blames her--taking in Key suddenly seems like a staggering amount of responsibility, and if he thought he could he would probably pass that off to his parents in a heartbeat. 

But he can still feel Key looking back to him, even as Jonghyun is asking them to raise their arms, their feet, making sure they aren’t hurt anywhere else, and something like instinct is telling him that he can’t betray that kind of trust. 

“They can stay here,” he says, and then adds “For now,” when he sees the look on Taeyeon’s face. “At least for tonight.”

“Can we at least figure out where the hell they came from?” she asks, gesturing towards Key again. “They have that card thing on still. Maybe it has an address.”

“It’s just a key card…” Eunsook starts, but Taeyeon shoots her a look and she just shrugs in response, having had enough of trying to calm Taeyeon down by now. “Fine.” 

Jonghyun sets the first-aid box aside and turns back to Key, who still has their head tipped back. “Hey, can we--” he starts, half-reaching towards the lanyard around Key’s neck so they won’t jump back again. 

Key looks over the gauze at Minho again. “We’re not going to tell anyone that you’re here,” Minho says. “We just want to know what’s going on.” 

Key pulls the lanyard over their head carefully, still holding the gauze under their nose with one hand. They keep the card clutched in their hand, still looking warily at Minho. He looks back at them pointedly, and after a moment they hand the card over to Jonghyun. 

“Thank you,” Jonghyun says, turning the card around to examine the smaller print next to the metallic strip. Beside him, Key starts pulling at one of the loose strings at the bottom of Minho’s sweater. Minho’s about to ask them to maybe stop, before the whole sweater unravels, when Jonghyun lets out a little gasp. 

“You guy…” he says slowly, turning the card around to face the others. “This is from the Hawkins Lab.”

There’s a long pause. “...what?” Eunsook says finally, reaching out to swipe the card from Jonghyun’s hand. “That can’t be right. Why would they be…”

“That’s the one that’s out on Mirkwood, right?” Taeyeon asks. “The one with the Department of Energy?” 

“No, Taeyeon, the other laboratory in Hawkins,” Eunsook deadpans. 

Taeyeon smacks her on the shoulder. “No, listen to me. The Department of Energy. They’re, like, a national government thing. And Key,” she says, nodding towards Key, who’s now got a sizeable string from Minho’s sweater in their hand (at this point, Minho doesn’t have the heart to tell them to stop). “They’re, like, telekinetic or something. Maybe it’s some government conspiracy to create superhumans? And they escaped from it?” 

“Taeyeon,” Jonghyun says slowly. “This isn’t actually a comic book. There’s probably some normal reason they have that.” 

“They threw a desk across the room,” Taeyeon shoots back. “There’s nothing really normal about that. There’s nothing normal about this entire situation, so my theory stands.”

“You really think they would do something like that, though?” Eunsook asks. Minho looks over at her; she looks genuinely worried this time, not just poking fun at Taeyeon. “You think they’d keep a kid up there? And so something so bad they’d want to run through the woods barefoot? I mean, Key’s made it pretty clear they don’t want us to contact them.” 

“It’s the government,” Jonghyun says. “They can do all kinds of evil .” 





“Are you sure you don’t want the bed?” Minho asks, unfolding another quilt and tossing it over the makeshift mattress he’s set up in the space under his lofted bed. “I can sleep on the floor.” 

Key shakes their head, picking at the long sleeves of the sweater they’re still wearing. And Minho knows it’s the last thing he should be thinking about, but it’s almost cute, the sweater paws and the nervous way Key shuffles back and forth once they’re settled in the space under Minho’s bed. It seems they’ve exhausted themself with wandering around the room and rifling through Minho’s things, which they’ve been absorbed in since Minho’s parents came home and he had to lock them inside to avoid suspicion. 

But there’s still the chance that his mother will drop in and check on him, so Minho uses the thickest blanket he has to tuck underneath his mattress, draping it down like a curtain over the spot where Key will be sleeping. “Is that too dark?” Minho asks, poking his head under the curtain when he’s finished. Key shakes their head at him, wide-eyed.

Which is fair, because it might have been a stupid question. But Jonghyun had suggested they might have something like PTSD after whatever happened to them, and he wants to be cautious.

The others have all left by now (after Jonghyun helped Minho move his desk back without scratching the floor any more), so it’s just the two of them, and Minho would rather just go to bed than try to deal with all the different directions his mind is taking right now. He still has a million questions--can you ever use your powers without hurting yourself, are you some kind of human experiment, are you actually a superhero like Taeyeon said--but if he’s learned anything tonight it’s that questioning Key doesn’t do much of anything except upset them.

“Well,” Minho says, lifting up the curtain again so he can talk to Key. They’ve settled themself down between the pillows, and already he can see their eyes starting to drift closed. He doesn’t know how long they were out there for, but he figures they could probably use a good night’s sleep. “There’s water over on the desk if you want, but if you want to leave the room you have to wait until I wake up again. I mean,” he says, starting to falter when Key just stares back at him, “My parents leave pretty early for work, but. You know. We have to be careful.” 

Key continues to just stare at Minho, and he figures that’s as much of an answer as he’ll get. “Alright,” he says, slowly letting the makeshift curtain fall. “Good night, then.” 

Minho snaps the lights off and climbs into his own bed, trying not to think about the fact that a telekinetic kid is sleeping in the bed under his. There’s no way he can sleep like this. He sprawls out facing the window, staring out at the orange-tinged light on the pavement. The street lamp next door is flickering, and he tries to busy himself with memorizing its pattern. 

“Minho? Are you there?” 

The voice startles him so badly he nearly falls over the edge of the bed. Below him, Key pokes their head out from the curtain, eyes wide. 

“It’s nothing, it’s okay, just--” Minho stammers, digging under his covers for the walkie-talkie he knows is buried somewhere under there. 

“Minho?” 

He finds the walkie wedged between his mattress and the wall and fishes it out, turning down the volume dial hastily before he answers Eunsook. “Yeah, I’m here. What’s up?” 

The walkie-talkies were a present from Jonghyun. Well, the first two had been a birthday present from Taeyeon to Jonghyun, back when she’d first gotten her job at the diner and wanted to show off the fact that she had spending money. Only having one person to talk to must have gotten boring, though, and she’d bought another two for Eunsook and Minho that Christmas (she’d missed both of their birthdays trying to save up). 

Minho had called her a nerd at the time, but he had to admit it was better than having to use the phone. 

“Did things go okay after we left?” Eunsook asks. “Key’s still there?” 

“Yeah, they’re still here,” Minho says, glancing down to the floor. Key’s still looking up at them, head tilted at the sight of the walkie-talkie. “Do you wanna see it?” Minho asks, holding the box out towards them. They shake their head, ducking back under the curtain. “Key says hi,” Minho says into the walkie. 

“Hi Key.” It’s Jonghyun’s voice this time. “Stop talking now, I was trying to sleep.” 

“Me too,” comes Taeyeon’s voice, but she’s accompanied by some muffled music that Minho can’t quite make out. 

“Is that Thriller?” Eunsook asks, clearing up any confusion for Minho. “You’re not sleeping, you’re just dicking around.” 

“Good choice,” says Jonghyun. 

“Okay, I’m actually going to sleep now,” Minho says, cutting off any rebuttal Taeyeon might have had. “Good night everybody.” 

“Night.” 

“Good night Minho. Good night Key.” 

“Bye, loser.” 

Minho rolls his eyes and sets the walkie down next to his pillow. He’s just got himself comfortable when the thing crackles to life again, though, Taeyeon’s voice cutting through a layer of static and background music--“You’re out of ti-ime, cause this is Thriller!”

“Taeyeon, shut up,” Eunsook comes through, but Minho can picture the exasperated smile on her face. 

The walkie-talkie crackles again, and now Jonghyun’s joining in, off-beat because he can’t hear the music. “There ain’t no second chance against the thing with forty eyes--”

“Guys,” Minho says, but Taeyeon comes in over him, and she’s moved closer to the speaker now so they can all hear the backtrack. 

“You’re fighting for your life inside a killer--”

Jonghyun cuts her off, still not on the beat. “Inside a killer! Thriller! Tonii--”

“I’m turning this off if you two don’t stop,” Eunsook warns, and there’s a full thirty seconds of silence before Taeyeon’s answering “Fine.” 

“Good night. For real this time.” Minho sighs into the walkie-talkie, dropping it again and smothering his face in the pillow without waiting for a response. He hears Key shift from somewhere underneath him, and he wouldn’t bet on it but he’s pretty sure he heard them giggling. 

•

(no. not here. not now. not when minhos here, he doesnt deserve this just for taking you in, not now, no, no, no no no no no no no no nonono nono nonono nonon nononono nonon nono no no nono no no nononononono-)

•

Minho sits bolt upright in bed, and it takes him a few seconds to realize that what woke him up was Key screaming. They’re backed into the corner behind the bed, clutching at the front of their sweater like their heart’s going to beat out of their chest. 

“Key, what…” Minho s for the light switch, trying to see whatever it is that’s worked Key up so badly. “What’s wrong?” he yawns, finally flicking the switch. 

The light bulb flares to life and shorts out, bursting so suddenly Minho’s pretty sure he heard the glass break. “What the hell…?” 

Still too asleep to register what’s happening, he flicks the switch a few more times. When that proves useless, he reaches further over the bed to the window, yanking the blinds open and letting the streetlights flood the room. 

Key screams again, a small, aborted sound that they muffle in the sleeves of their sweater. They duck their head down into their hands, and Minho notices that the streetlight is flickering abnormally fast, and when he turns toward it he understands. 

There’s something standing in the street. Something too tall and too thin to be human. Long hands like trees and thin, sharp fingers. Something with eyes that glitter up at him, more eyes than Minho can count in the second he has to stare before Key’s yanking him away from the window. 

“What--” he tries, but Key slaps a hand over his mouth, dragging the both of them back into the darkness of the corner. Key’s pressed up against Minho, and he’s not sure if it’s for his protection or Key’s own, but they’re shaking so hard he can’t help but shift to put an arm around them too. 

There’s a noise from somewhere outside and Key jolts. It’s like the sound of a TV that’s been left on, Minho thinks--a distant, steady whining that won’t stop ringing in the back of his mind. He tries to shift away, see if it’s that thing causing it, but Key pulls him back. 

“Don’t move,” they whisper, urgently enough that Minho complies without question. The almost-there sound slowly gets more and more present, and Key’s squeezing him so tight Minho can hear his own heartbeat over it, he’s starting to imagine that thing drawing its long, long fingers over the window, reaching inside--

And then it stops. Key looks up, uncertain, then slowly disentangles themself from Minho. The second they let go it’s like all the adrenaline of the situation hits him at once, like he’d been trying to stay calmer for their sake, but now he collapses back against the blankets as Key slowly moves to the curtain and peers underneath. 

“Is it gone?” Minho asks. He wants to move closer to Key again, wants to protect them because their hands are still shaking on the curtain, but his legs feel weak and useless. 

After a moment, Key nods and lets the curtain fall, plunging them both back into darkness. “Gone,” they say quietly. 

“Okay,” Minho says, still trying to get his bearings. “Okay. Do you...what was that?” 

He hears Key shuffling around in the dark, but no response. One of their hands lands dangerously close to Minho’s own, and he’s not sure if Key’s still alright with being this close, but he’s not exactly ready to venture back out beyond the curtain yet. 

“Key?” he asks again, trying to keep his voice steady and only failing slightly. “Do you know what that was?” 

An even longer silence. For a second Minho wants to be annoyed--he’s pretty sure he could have died just now, he deserves an explanation at least--but then he hears a tiny, muffled sound and he realizes Key is crying. 

“Key,” Minho says again, softer this time. He reaches out in the near darkness, fingers fumbling forward until they connect with one of Key’s arms. “Hey.” Key sniffles, louder this time, and Minho feels them lean into his touch a little, and all at once Minho’s wondering if anyone’s ever reached out to them like this, if human experiments get afforded this kind of comfort, and his heart aches. 

“Key, come here,” he whispers, and in the next instant Key’s leaning into Minho’s shoulder heavily and sobbing, hitching sobs that rattle through Minho’s bones. Carefully, so he doesn’t accidentally knock Key in the head in the dark, Minho gets one arm around Key’s shoulders, pulling them in closer. 

“It’s okay,” he says, chin resting on the top of Key’s head. “It’s okay. It’s gone now, whatever it was.” 

But he can already feel Key shaking their head against him, and what can Minho say to that? How can he convince Key that it’s going to be okay when he doesn’t know that, when he has no ing clue what’s going on anymore? 

Key shifts against his shoulder, and between shuddering breaths Minho makes out the words, “I’m sorry.” 

“What?” Minho lifts his head, tilting so he can at least see the outline of Key’s face in the dark. “Sorry for what?” he asks. 

•

(you should never have left. you should never have left. you should never have inflicted that thing on anyone but yourself. this is all your fault, your fault, your fault. 

hed be safe if it wasn’t for you. he wouldnt even know this kind of danger existed. hed be asleep, or hed be with eunsook and taeyeon and jonghyun, and none of this would matter, you wouldnt matter, because thats how it was supposed to be. 

so yes, youre sorry. youre sorry that youre so desperate for some affection, for someone to hold on to, that youre putting minhos life at risk. youre sorry that you cant just walk out now, that the thought of going back under those lights, under the anonymous stares of all those men, makes you feel like your skin is peeling. youre sorry that youre ruining everything.

but minhos not listening, or else hes decided youre wrong, because hes still there, holding you, whispering into your hair that its going to be okay, that you have nothing to be sorry for. and its something youve only read about--being close to someone, crying on someone, letting someone care for you in this sudden, wrenchingly genuine way, and still hes telling you that you have nothing to be sorry for. 

but you do, you do, you do. 

he asked you, before, what that thing was, but how do you tell him? how do you explain the monster your mind spat out without giving yourself away completely, without seeming as horrible as you are on the inside and forcing him away from you, and you cant stand the thought of that, either, of losing this thing you never thought you could have before. 

but he has to know. he asked, and he has to know. 

its me, you say, hating the way your voice splits into another sob because still you cant stop crying. its me. 

he doesnt understand. what do you mean? whats you?

how do you tell him? how do you make him understand this? so rarely have you had to communicate outside of your own mind before, and the words dont come to you like they seem to for minho and the others. how do you explain something your own mind has done?

its hard to pull yourself away from the circle of minhos arms, but you have to tell him, and this is the only way you can think of. when you lift up the blanket curtaining the two of you, the light from the open window startles you, and it takes a minute to remember theres nothing there now, that your own monster has decided to toy with you for a little while longer. 

you cross the room to minhos desk. youre not sure if hes watching you, but he doesnt protest as you rifle through it for a few sheets of paper and something to write with, and he doesnt protest when you lift the curtain completely, exposing him to the light as well so he can see what youre doing. 

you may not know how to talk to him, but you can at least try to draw. and minho is nothing if not attentive, more attentive than you deserve, hovering just behind your shoulder as you try to show him everything you cant put words to. 

the lab isnt too hard to draw, youre sure hes seen that before. and the scientists, theyre easy enough. easy enough, too, to gesture at the things they made you do, the blood pooled across the floor, the bodies buried out in the woods. and then you escaping, you finding minho, that part he already knows. 

drawing your mind is still hard. its a lot of arrows and hand gestures and dark, -out sections of the paper that dont really do the darkness of the other side justice. and its hard to explain the fear you felt the first time you found the monster there, the first time it turned to you with those eyes and eyes and eyes, staring through you, saying i know what you did i know who you are and you and i are the same. 

but as you draw, minho doesnt say anything. he just shuffles in closer to you, bumps his shoulder against yours. and when youre done he takes the papers from you and studies them hard, tracing over the drawings with his fingers, brow knit together. and then he takes your hand, pulls you back to the bed and urges you to climb up onto the mattress with him, and tells you that right now what you deserve to do is get some sleep.

he doesnt hate you, not yet, so maybe he didnt understand the gravity of it, the darkness of those spaces in your mind that you couldnt draw. but maybe, you think, leaned against his shoulder, maybe he understands.)

•

Minho finds himself jolting awake for the second time. He doesn’t remember falling asleep last night, doesn’t remember much, in fact, after trying to calm Key down after--

With a pang he realizes Key’s not in bed next to him, remembers falling asleep with them resting on his shoulder. He jumps out of bed, landing with a soft thump on the bed he’d set out for them, and is out of the bedroom door before he hears the knocking again. 

Some residual adrenaline from last night reminds him of the creature staring in through the window, but logic tells him that someone knocking at the door must have woken him up. The sun is already high, flooding the picture windows in the living room as he passes; it must be past noon already. The rest of the house is quiet; his parents must have left for work already. 

He pauses at the front door--he’s still not sure where Key is, and if anyone else is looking for them too, they might not be the kind of people Minho wants in his house while he’s still in his pajamas. But a glance through the peephole reveals that it’s just Jonghyun. 

“You could have called first--” Minho starts, but Jonghyun pushes past him. He’s dressed hastily, hoodie pulled on over his pajama bottoms, and now that he’s inside Minho can see the fear in his eyes. “What’s going on?” 

“Taeyeon’s missing,” Jonghyun says, and Minho doesn’t miss the way his voice wavers on the second word. “She wasn’t answering on the walkie this morning, and Eunsook called over to her house but Taesun said she hadn’t leave the house today, and he doesn’t know why she isn’t there, so of course he’s freaking out too, and we’ve been looking for her but she’s not at the school or at the library or the diner so I thought maybe she’d be here, but…” he trails off, and Minho figures his expression gives Jonghyun the answer he was hoping he wouldn’t get. 

“,” Jonghyun whispers. “Minho, what if--what if someone--”

But Minho’s not really listening anymore. No, his mind’s already running to the creature from the night before, to the spindly fingers reaching in through the window. And then he thinks about Taeyeon, all alone in her room just a few houses down the street, no one to warn her or help her or pull her away from all the eyes at the window, and what he says instead of answering Jonghyun is, “We need to find Key.” 

Jonghyun’s worried face actually falls flat for a moment at that. “What?” 

“Listen,” Minho says, already racing off to the stairs again, talking to Jonghyun over his shoulder. “Last night there was...there was this thing, some kind of monster thing that’s after Key, I think. And it was here. On this street.” 

“Minho, what the hell are you talking about?” Jonghyun asks, racing up the stairs after him. “A monster”

“A monster,” Minho repeats, not bothering to knock before yanking open the bathroom door. “It was. God, I don’t know what it was, Jonghyun. But it didn’t get us, me and Key I mean, for whatever reason, but that means it was still out there, so maybe it--”

“...got Taeyeon?” Jonghyun says, and the waver in his voice is back. “Minho, do you know how crazy that sounds?” 

Minho does, in fact, know how crazy that sounds. But everything about the last day has been more than crazy, and if Key has any idea where Taeyeon might be, then it’s Key that he needs to talk to right now, not Jonghyun. He can’t think about what those long, sharp fingers could do to someone’s body, can’t think about Taeyeon out there somewhere, trapped in something like those horrifying pictures Key drew last night, scared and alone or worse--

There’s a coat closet at the end of the hallway, beside Minho’s bedroom, and it’s there that he finds Key with their face pressed against the wall, eyes closed. It’s almost as if they’re meditating, but Minho barely hesitates before reaching out and touching their shoulder. If they know anything about Taeyeon, that’s what’s most important right now. 

As soon as Key opens their eyes, Minho’s crouching down beside them, ignoring Jonghyun’s pleas to tell him what the hell is going on. “Key,” Minho says, “Did you know about Taeyeon? Do you know what happened to her?” 

They pause for a moment, glancing over Minho at Jonghyun, and Minho finds himself holding his breath, but then they give him a tiny nod.

“Do you know if she’s okay?” Minho asks. 

A shrug. Key looks back down to the floor. 

“Is she alive?” Minho feels bad for raising his voice to Key, but he can’t help it--Taeyeon’s always been the baby of the friend group, the one who they all keep an eye on even when she swears she doesn’t need it, and if anything were to happen to her now…

Key nods again, and Minho sighs with relief. “Do you know where she is? Can we help her?” 

Key hesitates, shaking one sleeve of their sweater nervously. “Minho,” Jonghyun tries again, “How do we know that any of this is actually useful? I mean, if she was taken by some...thing, then what could they--”

“I can find her,” Key says, startling Jonghyun into silence. “I can.”

•

(this is all your fault. this is all your fault. everything is always your ing fault.

Eunsooks voice is echoing on the walkie-talkie resting between you, jonghyun? jonghyun, has key told you anything? do they know where she is?

you might know where she is if you had more room to think. youd thought maybe the closet would be dark enough to let you reach inside your mind and feel something, anything, about where she might be, but apparently all those years of being forced into confinement still weren’t enough to teach you a damn thing. 

you know if you had just given yourself up it never would have gone after taeyeon. and you know that if you dont stop it now it wont stop with her, either. itll go for eunsook instead, for jongyhun. for minho. youve written the villain to your own story. you cant unwrite that, not without destroying yourself.

but maybe you can try to fix it. youre sick of waiting and watching and never never doing anything to stop this, to stop yourself. 

minhos asking you something again, but youre not listening. the first quilt you grab is fairly thin, doesnt block out nearly as much light as you need, but you grab another, and another, until youre almost certain youll smother yourself in the coccoon of blankets. 

what are they doing? jonghyun asks minho. he sounds muffled, and its not the same as being underwater but its close enough. youve done this more than enough times now. you have to get it right now, the only time its ever really mattered. 

minhos answering I dont know to jonghyun is all but inaudible in your mind, youre already sinking down, into the darkness youve known for so long. and youre not dropping off completely, not this time--just deep enough to gague the dimensions, the space in which the monsters been traveling. just deep enough that even those eyes wont see you yet.

and its faint, at first, but you see her. or maybe you feel her; you feel something small and scared and its so strong that you almost cant equate it with the taeyeon you know, the taeyeon who’s all laughter and backhanded comments and hopeful glances towards eunsook, and for a moment you regret that you wont have time to really know who taeyeon is. 

but thats not important anymore. 

you pull your head up from the blankets, interrupting eunsook over the walkie-talkie. I know where she is, you say. 

eunsook is at the house quicker than seems possible. or maybe youve lost time. youre still a little dizzy from that last reach, but minho helps you down the stairs and into the driveway. 

we have to do this fast, minho says, rolling his bike out from the garage. I dont know exactly what it is that monster can do, but we dont want to give it time. jonghyun and eunsook just nod at him. 

eunsooks bike has spokes on the back for you to stand on, but in spite of everything you find yourself hesitating. and thats awful, this isnt about you, this shouldnt matter, but you glance back at minho and instantly hes there beside you, saying, eunsook, trade bikes with me. and she glances back to you and doesnt question anything, just hops off the bike and hands it off to minho, and youre so suddenly overwhelmed that you have to shut your eyes as you ride. 

the four of you travel in silence; each of them apparently knows the route to the high school so well theres no need to talk about it now. and a few minutes ago the silence would have been welcome, but now you just want something to distract you. you settle for unraveling more of the thread at the bottom of minhos sweater; it doesnt really matter if you destroy it now, does it?

the school is deserted, youre not even sure if its open, but eunsook jostles a back door near the pool and it clicks open. she ushers all of you through silently, and you file through the hallway. 

its your first and only time in a school, but its about what youd expected from the books youve read. mottled white tiles, white walls, tall windows at either end of a hall of tall brown lockers. everything is silent. 

so how do we find taeyeon? jonghyun asks, voice tight as he turns to you. 

but thats an explanation you dont have in you, so you settle for telling them all simply, I will. 

its almost like this was set up perfectly for you. you cross to one of the lockers without a lock on it and lift the door open. its the perfect size, once youve slid in--cramped and pressing in on you, and so similar to the chamber youd been dropped into so many times you can already feel yourself drifitng. 

Ill bring her back, you say, to all of them but really to minho. you want him to understand, you hope so desperately that he knows what this is. that this could be your only chance to make up for anything youve ever done. this could be the only mistake you get to reverse.

the locker door clicks shut on you.)



(its always colder than you remember. nothing can prepare you for the sudden plunge into the cold, empty space where you were never meant to be. when you were younger, before youd discovered how simple it was to take somethings life, you used to wonder why you had something so cold in your own mind.

the landscape around you is as murky as ever, but its easier to move when you have something to focus on. shes much stronger here, so obviously doesnt belong in this world of bad memories. you move towards her quickly, because this is what you were trained for--seeking, pinpointing, finding targets. 

but when you come across her, huddled under the frozen remains of a desk with one of the creatures long, spindly fingers pierced through her arm, this is where you come up short. in any other situation you wouldnt be saving her. it would be you pinning her down, not the detatched body part of some monster you created to hunt her. it would be you who makes sure she never makes it out of here. 

she looks up at you, fear and recognition scrawled over her face, and you wonder how you ever let yourself become the villain. 

come on, you say, bending down towards her and gripping the end of the spike in your hands. it pulls away easily enough, and she barely flinches--this place slows everything down, including her, including you, and you know soon you wont be strong enough to pull her out. 

you help her to her feet unsteadily. you know the way back to the locker well enough, now its just a matter of getting her to--

a faint, whining roar shocks through you and your heart plummets. not yet, you think desperately. not yet, not here, you need to get taeyeon out first before you--

taeyeon whimpers, clutching harder at your shoulder, and you follow her eyes to your left, to where another and another and another set of eyes are watching you from the gloom. 

run, you shout, leaning taeyeons weight more fully on you, not caring anymore if the monster hears. as long as she can make it through, you can do this. you can still change this. you can still be a hero for once.

so you run.)

•

The locker door bangs open, and Jonghyun jumps back as Taeyeon and Key tumble out onto the floor. 

In an instant Key is hauling Taeyeon back onto her feet. She stumbles a little, like she hasn’t gotten her bearings back yet. Her hair is hanging over her face in tangles and her clothes look tattered and Minho can see a smear of blood across her lip and seeping through her sleeve, but she’s alive. 

Key urges her forward, towards Eunsook, who gratefully takes Taeyeon out of their arms and rests her against her shoulder. “Go,” Key says, voice urgent, and now Minho’s beginning to notice their wide eyes and stiff legs, like they’re an instant away from making a run for it. “Go, now. Run.” 

Eunsook takes one look at the locker Key just burst out of and apparently can’t find it in her to question them. “Help me,” she says to Jonghyun, who’s already moving to Taeyeon’s other side, getting an arm around his shoulders so the two of them can help her down the hallway as quickly as possible. 

“You too,” Key says, urging Minho after them with a frantic hand on his shoulder. “Go.” 

And there’s a part of Minho that wants to listen, to follow Taeyeon out and make sure she’s safe, that the thing with too many eyes didn’t take anything from her that they can’t get back. But there’s another part of him, maybe a more selfish part, that understands that if he leaves now Key will stay behind. 

“What about you?” Minho asks, turning to face Key instead. They just shake their head at him, pointing again to where Jonghyun and Eunsook are glancing back towards him in confusion, trying to understand why Minho isn’t following. 

And then the floor beneath their feet explodes. 

Maybe explodes isn’t quite right, though, Minho thinks as he’s blasted backwards with his ears ringing. Because nothing seems broken, really, but something burst from the floor all the same, something bent it and snapped it back into place as if it were made of cheap plastic. Something’s coming straight for him and Key. 

“Run!” Key shouts over the whine in Minho’s ears, grabbing him by the arm and tugging him backwards as he struggles to make his feet work again. And it’s the monster, the same monster from before, eyes and eyes and eyes all staring at Minho making him feel so small he has to struggle to remember how to run. 

It’s closing in on him by the time he can make his feet work, and he has a moment to see the vertical slit lined with teeth that runs up the length of its body before the fluorescent lights in the hall start to blow out.

Key’s still pulling him forward, faster now that Minho’s on his feet and the monster is at their heels, intensifying that steady whine in Minho’s ears that he’s not sure he’ll ever be rid of now. In the flash of another light bulb shorting out Minho sees Key wrenching open a door. In another flash he sees the monster fly back, a good twenty feet down the hallway, and in the next flash understands that it was Key who forced it back. 

And then Key’s throwing Minho through the door, slamming it shut and leaning against it as if their thin body can hold it shut. Blood is dripping from their nose and from their left ear, but there’s no time to point this out before the light bulb in the far corner of the room bursts. 

“Key,” Minho gasps. Another bulb bursts, raining sparks down onto the science lab they’re locked in. The door behind Key bangs violently, but they hold themself against it, blood now dripping steadily from their ear. “Key,” Minho tries again, over another burst of electricity. “What do we do?” 

Key fixes them with a stare, and their eyes are so similar to the monster’s, in an eerie way. But there’s no malice there, only conviction--and Minho understands. 

“I did this,” they say, so quietly Minho’s not sure how he can hear them over the roar of the power surging. “I have to fix it.” 

But there’s no way, there’s no way this is the only option. There’s no way Minho’s going to lose Key here, so soon, when he’s barely gotten a chance to learn anything about them. When they’ve barely gotten their own chance at life. 

“You can’t,” Minho says. “You can’t do that. We’ll figure something else out, you--”

But Key is shaking their head, reaching out to take one of Minho’s hands in their own. “It’s okay,” they say, giving his hand a squeeze, and Minho thinks frantically that this is the calmest he’s ever seen them before. For the first time, they seem sure of themself. 

“I’ll be the hero,” they whisper to him. 

And then they’re letting go of Minho’s hand, and before he can react they’re turning, running, throwing the door open and leaping headfirst into the claws of the monster as it roars, eyes swiveling to Minho--

The impact is so loud it knocks Minho back against the lab tables and so bright it whites out his vision, and it seems to stretch on and on so long he doesn’t know how much more he can take, doesn’t know how long he has to wait curled up on the ground before he can pull himself to his feet and go after Key and then--

Silence. 

•

(when you were younger you thought you could be a superhero. thats what theyd always lead you to believe, the scientists who were kind enough to speak to you and give you books to look at. you thought that was the whole point--to use your ability for good, to use it as a trump card against the bad guys they were always telling you about.

you stopped believing that when it became about more than that, more than just spying and sneaking around in the dark and pulling things to you. when it became about pain, about hurting other people, about the animals and then the people you killed because you were scared of what would happen if you didn’t.

pain isnt heroic, so you know youre not a hero. your abilities even hurt you, and maybe thats when you should have figured it out. when you should have guessed that the path you were destined for was something much darker, much worse. 

it wasnt until you first created the monster, though, till you first came face-to-face with the recesses of your own mind and saw what you were truly made of, that you realized you could never be anyone good. that no one good could have that inside of them. that no one who wasnt created just to harm people would inflict that on the world.

but.

that doesnt mean you stopped wanting to be good. that you stopped wishing you were that superhero. and if minho, eunsook, taeyeon, jonghyun--if they taught you anything in the brief time you got to pretend to be human, it was that there are people worth saving. there are people worth pretending to be good for. 

people worth dying for.

and part of you is still so, so scared of the monster, always has been, always has shied away from those probing eyes that always seemed so much like your own. but thats what being a hero is about, you think. its about being afraid--being afraid of your enemies, being afraid of monsters, being afraid to die--and doing it anyway.

so you do.)

•