SoulMate

Soulmate

Shin Hyesung knows he has a soulmate out there, somewhere. He's sure of it, but how will he ever find her?...or him for all he knew.
He didn't care either way, as long as he would find his soulmate and would finally be able to hold that person in his arms.
It has been 37 years now...no of course not, not since birth, let's say since he was 16 (probably earlier though) he has felt like there was 'The one' for him out there somewhere, so he has been looking for her for 21 years now...and still no sign of her. He often had thought it was just his imagination, his dreams that had gotten out of control, making him think that there was just one specific person for him in this big world. He had listened to other people's thought on "soulmates", without telling them his own true feelings of course, most people didn't believe in it was his final conclusion. But no matter how he tried, he just couldn't get rid of his ideas, his feeling that he should be searching for one person in this whole world. He had tried, definitely tried to love, he had dated and sincerely cared about the girls...but in the end he reached the same point every time, he just didn't really love them, not like he loved this unknown person who was in his heart but not in his world.
He had been thinking about it for 21 years now; maybe it was that only a few people had soulmates, and that most people could just love freely, a person of their own choice, to put it bluntly. That should be it, otherwise more people should feel the same as he did.

After he joined Shinhwa and his life had been like a rollercoaster for a few years, he had at one point realized that being famous would maybe also help him in finding his soulmate. It also made things more difficult maybe, but the upside seemed more important. The thing was, he didn't know where to even start looking for her, the hope that he would just bump into her in the grocery store at the end of the street was long gone. Lady Fortuna wasn't that good to him, otherwise he would've found her by now, so it seemed he had to try to find her himself, maybe faith would be able to help a little, but he didn't count on it anymore.
But now that he became famous and his face was all over Asia and even a little bit in the rest of the world, maybe...just maybe faith could just help out a little bit. Maybe his soulmate would find out about Shinhwa and then maybe she would recognize him as her soulmate, or not as her soulmate yet, but at least fall for him a bit and then come to see them and they would be able to meet. He was sure that the minute they would look at each other that they would know!
He knew there where allot of maybe's in his reasoning, but it was all he had left...; maybe's and hope.
So he worked even harder to become known to more people and to reach more places on this big earth. Like that many years had gone by and lately he started to feel he was getting too old, he had hoped to be able to have children with his soulmate, to start a family with the one he loved. But the older he got the less chance there was left for that...he didn't want to be greedy though, even if he wouldn't find her in time to start a family, he just wanted to find her, he missed her terribly!

The other members had noticed he was getting more restless and depressed lately, they had carefully tried to ask what was bothering him. But what could he do? He could hardly tell them he felt so lonely while they where with him, or that he missed being loved by someone while he was surrounded by people who loved him true thick and thin. He didn't want them to worry, he was immeasurably grateful for them, they had made his life worth living and had filled it with so many happy and fun moments. He felt horribly guilty for feeling like he was alone in this world while these wonderful people where always there for him. But he couldn't help it...he just needed his soulmate more and more each day that went by.

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Then one day the unthinkable happened..., he saw her!
He almost tripped because of it, startling the bodyguards and members around him. He quickly assured them he was fine and looked back at the crowd of Shinhwa Changjo where he had seen her, but she was gone...he couldn't find her anymore. He couldn't believe it! She had been taller than most of the others and really stood out from the crowd, that's why his eyes had noticed her in the first place. He had only looked at her for 2 seconds, she seemed quite startled as well, and then he had tripped... making him look away and now unable to find her again.
He kept scanning the crowd until the bodyguards pushed him inside the building, he cursed under his breath, making the bodyguards quickly retreat a step and the members closest to him jump in surprise at his unexpected outburst. They knew better than to ask questions when he was suddenly so annoyed.
He let out a deep sigh, on one hand his heart was about to burst because he finally had seen her and she was so close by, and on the other hand he felt like going totally berserk because she was gone again. He knew it was no option to go out there and search for her, even if he could manage to get out there before they could stop him, there was an army of fans standing there who would definitely make it impossible. He could only hope, once more that damned "hope", that she would appear in front of him again now that she was this close...there was nothing else he could do.
After that he could hardly concentrate, he couldn't get her out of his mind. Not only had he seen his soulmate for the first time, but she had been very pretty as well, that thought made him grin. "SHIN HYESUNG!!" the sudden outburst from their forever patient leader made him jump out of his chair.
"I don't know what your problem is since we arrived here," Eric continued on a more normal volume "and i don't need to know either. But please get out, then get over it, and when you are able to concentrate again please come back. Now you're only distracting and we can't afford that right now.". Knowing that when Eric gave such a long speech he had reached the limits of his patience Hyesung walked towards the door while softly mumbling "Geez Eric...", he felt like having a smoke anyway.

He made his way to a backdoor of the building while avoiding the bodyguards in the waiting area, he wanted to be alone and if there where still fans around they would be at the front door. When he stepped outside he let out a deep breath, he had felt stuffy and cooped up inside, it felt like his spirit lifted..maybe the sunshine just made him feel better. Suddenly he heard some rustling and someone mumbling on the other side of the bushes, he carefully peeked around the corner to see what or who it was.
It was her!!! The girl he had recognized as his soulmate when their eyes briefly met before. She was mumbling to herself, he couldn't hear what she was saying, and just took out what seemed like a map from her bag and trying to carefully open it. She was so busy that she didn't notice Hyesung staring at her, he grinned while observing her and thinking it was so cute how she was talking to herself. He cleared his throat while he stepped out from behind the bushes, "Hi" was all he could think of to say. She looked up from the map and it seemed like she at least jumped a meter up in the air, in turn also startling Hyesung. She made a quick bow and stammered "H-Hii", it seemed like she was going to turn and leave immediately, but when she looked up their eyes met and they both just stared at each other.
Carefully Hyesung took a step forward, it seemed like she was quite scared, he finally managed to find his voice again "You!" he said. She flinched "Ah...sorry, sorry to disturb you, i'll go now.", she grabbed her bag and turned to leave. Hyesung panicked; she could leave, not again! "No! Wait! Don't leave!" he almost screamed while he jumped forward and grabbed her arm. She turned back towards him surprised and he quickly let go of her arm "Ah sorry, sorry about that" he quickly said "but please don't leave.", he didn't understand...didn't she know? Didn't she recognized him as her soulmate?
She was staring at the ground in front of her feet like it was the most interesting thing she had ever seen. "Don't you recognize me?" Hyesung carefully tried, his heart jumped when she nodded "Yes...Shin Hyesung...-si", and his heart dropped again. He let out a breath he didn't even notice he was holding "No, that's not...not what i mean. uhm..." he had to think about how to put this so that she wouldn't think he was crazy or something, "Earlier...we looked at each other as well. No..., wait..." he let out a frustrated sigh. An idea popped up in his mind "Haven't you been looking for someone for a long time? A specific person i mean." he bluntly said. Her eyes shot up and she looked at him in utter surprise and confusion, he thought he saw tears b in her eyes, but she quickly blinked them away. He had to use this momentum and not loose it he realized, again he tried with a soft voice "Don't you recognize me?", again she nodded, this time slowly like she wasn't sure herself. Hyesung took a careful step towards her and gave her a smile, he wanted to hold her in his arms desperately, but he couldn't yet, she didn't seem to be quite sure yet, though now she just kept gazing at him just as he was gazing at her.
"Where have you been?" his desperate voice suddenly said, it just came out, he hadn't wanted to actually say it, though it had been in his thoughts the whole time. "I didn't know where you were." she answered softly, she was obviously now talking to him as her soulmate and not to him being Shin Hyesung, it astonished him that she would actually answer like that. It seemed she never had realized that Shin Hyesung was actually her soulmate, but she had just been attracted to him true an unseen force...it was just as he had wished for. "Me neither." he answered back smiling ruefully, she smiled back at him and it was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. 
He lifted his hand a bit towards her face "May i?" he asked, she nodded while her cheeks turned slightly pinkish "I just want to make sure i'm not imagining things." he explained. He took another step towards her so he was now standing right in front of her, he softly brushed her cheek with his finger tips. "You're really real." he mumbled more to himself than to her, a small smile grazed her lips and she gave a slight nod. He placed his hand carefully against the side of her face, like she was made of porcelain, while they just kept staring into each others eyes the whole time.

After a while he again saw tears in her eyes "Why? What's wrong?" he asked, she tried to quickly blink them away again, but it didn't work, the tears started to come out. She stepped back and wiped her face with her hands "It's nothing, never mind." she said. But he didn't plan on letting this go, she was his soulmate and she was crying! "Please tell me." he said while taking a step towards her again so he was right in front of her once more. "Ah no...it's just...I realized that it must've been even more difficult for you. Even more hopeless and probably also longer." she gave in. It took a few second before Hyesung understood what she meant, while he felt tears starting to brim behind his own eyes as well he asked "You mean; knowing there was someone out there for me, my soulmate?". She nodded slightly, Hyesung couldn't hold back anymore, he took the last step towards her, closing the gap between them entirely as he put his arms around her shoulders pulling her into his embrace. He felt her flinch the moment he pulled her towards him, but even though his mind says he should let her go, his body refuses to respond. Soon enough he feels her slightly relaxing in his arms. "I don't know if it was harder for me, at least i had the hope you would see a picture or video of me somewhere and would somehow recognize or be attracted to me. What could you do, try to search the whole world by yourself?", he tightened the embrace a bit for a second, as to give her a slight extra hug. She sighed "I was following my feelings, hoping they would lead me towards you.". "Seems both have worked somehow together, finally" Hyesung said, "Yes, finally." she agreed.
"DAMNIT SHIN HYESUNG" came Eric's voice suddenly from the door behind the bushes. Both of them jump away from each other in panic, Eric came around the corner "I know i said not to come back before you had it all sorted, whatever it was, but you are really taking your sweet time aren't you?!". Eric only noticed the girl after he had finished his sentence, his cheeks flushing in embarrassment when she gave a deep bow to him. He cleared his throat "Hyesung, are you coming back inside? We need you to join in now.". "Oohh yeah, of course. I'll be right there." Hyesung realized he had totally forgotten about the meeting he was supposed to attend, what should he do now...? He didn't want to leave his soulmate already, but he couldn't bring her inside neither, there was no way he could explain that to the other guys. After Eric had gone back inside he turned to face her again, but before he could think of what to say or do she already spoke "It's ok, go finish what you are supposed to do." she said with a smile, "I'll just wait here, i'm not going anywhere!" she added firmly. Hyesung shrugged, not able to come up with any better ideas, "Alright... But promise me you will stay here! Don't go away! I will come and pick you up here after i'm finished.".
She nodded "I will be right here waiting for you, don't worry.".

 


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Wow, this was totally unexpected, it just popped into my mind, an unexpected one-shot about Shin Hyesung.
I hope you liked it, and that it wasn't too boring...~thinking back~...it probably is really boring...sorry about that,
but i spend...geez...4 hours, it's already 1:30 am i need to sleep! :o,
so i spend half of my night to write this...so, boring or not, i'm gonna post it ;P
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korasoul #1
Wow...I realy like it. Nice and sweet story..
DolphinWorld
2019 streak #2
Chapter 1: Hey there ^^ I just finished reading this oneshot and noticed that you haven't received any comment yet. So I thought I would leave you one ^^
btw I'm not a SJC and I'm not Hyesung's fan either. But don't ask me what I'm doing here then. hehe XD I'm a Cassiopeia who respects Shinhwa a lot and I kinda like them too. Just not a fan. But somehow happened to read this oneshot and then decided to leave a comment. haha I'm sorry, I have gone crazy I suppose. Anyway, fighting!!!