“Yah! Why are you smiling?!” Junmyeon waved his hands in the air with a ridiculous expression on his face.

I schooled my smile into a look of indifference. “What do you mean?”

He sighed. “Never mind. My point is, that was a very stupid decision of you to make. And I’d like to emphasize the fact that you never told me or consulted me throughout the whole deal.”

“Yeah, but-”

“But what? It takes two to tango. Admit it, Hyejin. It was a selfish choice. She was my daughter too.”

I frowned, looking up at him. His eyebrows were furrowed while his lips were pressed into a thin line, showing his displeasure. He was right, but I wasn’t in the mood for backing down.

“Yeah, it was selfish. So what? Look at yourself. You’re making millions, you’re living your dream. It’s what you’ve wanted since you were a child, Junmyeon. I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you. But I can only tell you over and over again that it was for your own good.”

“My own good?!” he barked, features twisting into a sarcastic smile. “Darling, you didn’t even ask me. You wouldn’t have known what I wanted.”

I scoffed. “A daughter would have killed your dreams.”

“She’d be our new dream! I’d love her, I’d-”

“I hated her.”

“What?” his voice dropped to a softer tone. His eyes searched mine to why I could have possibly answered in that way. Mothers were supposed to love and cherish their children. Back then, we had talked about having a nice big family. It was more than shocking for him to her me say those hurtful words.

“I hated her, Junmyeon. I hated her so, so much,” I whispered, dropping my gaze. I didn’t dare to look at him. “She chose to enter my life at such a horrible time. We were just nineteen and too young to do anything. I had to kill her before she killed your future. She was going to ruin everything.”

“You… don’t really mean that, do you?” he asked gently, approaching me slowly.

“I do.” I insisted stubbornly.

He crouched down so that he was lower than me from where I was sitting and placed a hand on my knee. “Then why do you cry over her every single year? Why do you look like you regret getting the abortion?”

“I cry because I became a murderer that night. I don’t regret it.”

He sighed. “Hyejin, you don’t hate our daughter.”

“Yes, I do! Stop telling me otherwise!” I exclaimed, making his eyes go wide. “She made me have that horrible morning sickness and weird food cravings. I put on so much weight at the time and it took me months to lose weight again.”

“The morning sickness…” Junmyeon muttered, as if recalling an old memory. “I remember. It was since then?”

I nodded. “I know, it sounds selfish. Like I only care for my physical appearance. But you have to know, I hate our daughter the most because she took me away from you. I had to go to China for five freaking years to save your career all because of her. And don’t tell me that I should’ve consulted you first.”

“If you describe her that way, I’d hate her too. You’re looking at things from the wrong point of view. She was our daughter. We both created her, and she was family. I would’ve loved her even if I didn’t get to be a singer, and I bet you would’ve too. I don’t see anything wrong in pursuing a regular job with the love of my life and my lovely daughter. It would actually look like the perfect picture.”

At his words, tears escaped my eyes and started rolling down my cheeks. Junmyeon’s hands reached up to wipe the tears hurriedly before I could even do so. What he said was 100% true, and I hated him for pointing that out.

He swept me up from my seat and swiftly brought the both of us to the sofa. I was positioned on his lap as he brought me closer to his chest. I could feel his shirt soaking up the tears as I sobbed into him.

“Shh, don’t cry. Don’t cry.” He murmured into my hair, my back.

I couldn’t stop. The tears from yesterday weren’t enough for me it seemed, and I was sure I looked like a huge mess again.

“It’s okay, Hyejin. These past years haven’t been easy on you, hmm?” he whispered. “Actually, the least I can do is thank you for thinking that your decision would help me.”

I was confused. He was thanking me? I croaked out an unsure mumble.

“Honestly speaking, it’s not right for me to keep blaming you for doing this. You thought it was the best choice, so you did for our own good, specifically mine. So I should be thanking you for this, and not constantly pinning the blame on you.”

At that, my body wracked with sobs. “I don’t deserve you. I really don’t deserve you.”

He tightened his hold around me. “Stop spouting nonsense. If anything, it’s me who doesn’t deserve you. I still can’t believe you went through all that by yourself.”

I pulled away from him and wiped my face with a sleeve. “I’m sorry, Junmyeon,” I conceded tiredly. “For everything. I didn’t tell you, I left, I killed her and I’m came back so suddenly. Plus, I probably look like a ridiculous mess right now.”

“It’ll take some time, but I’m sure I’ll forgive you. And don’t worry. Even after crying, you look like an angel.”

A blush spread across my cheeks. “I missed you, Junmyeon.”

“I missed you too, Hyejin.”

With a sudden tug, I ended up pressed close to him once more with his lips on the crown of my head. I s my arms around his torso as well, and indulged the silence for what I hoped would be a long time. I then spent the next five minutes staring at his face shamelessly. He, on the other hand, had his eyes closed as he held me.

Observing the dark circles under his eyes, I concluded that the life of a celebrity didn’t reward much sleep.

“Why are you staring at me.” He murmured, coming out more of a statement than a question.

I narrowed my eyes at him even though he couldn’t see me. “What are you talking about?”

“I can feel your eyes burning holes into my face,” he chuckled, opening an eye. “It has been a while since you’ve seen someone as handsome as me, right?”

I huffed under my breath. “Take a look at your dark circles before you say anything. They’re a nightmare to look at. Didn’t you get any sleep, huh? This is so like you, to stay up for practices. I totally remember how you were like in school back then.”

He chuckled. “I like how you manage to insult and compliment me in the same sentence.”

Suddenly, my phone buzzed, the screen lighting up with a notification. I unlocked my phone only to be greeted by a text message from Seungwan. There was a lot of exclamation points and emoticons, with a link attached to the bottom.

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