Chapter IV

Yonghwa thanked all the hosts of the show and went directly to their waiting room. He just finished recording a guesting on Radio Star, together with his band member, Jonghyun. It was already past midnight. He was tired and all he wanted was go home and rest. Having finished a concert in Japan just last night, he didn’t have enough sleep for the past few days. They flew in this afternoon to Korea and attended some fan meetings before they came for the show. He didn’t even have the chance to go home yet.

     “What was that?” Jonghyun asked behind Yonghwa when they entered their waiting room.

     He turned and faced his band member. “What?” he asked, although he already knew what he was talking about.

     “‘I had to develop feelings for her for the show?’ Are you ing serious?” asked, anger visible in his face.

    “Jonghyun-”

     “It wasn’t not enough that you voluntary brought up Shinhye’s name when you were talking about Hyunnie, you just had to go down really low and tell the world she was only just a job for you.”

     Jonghyun was obviously angry about how he handled the situation about Seohyun during the show and he knew why. Jonghyun and the other two members of CNBlue were very protective of Seohyun. After their break up, they always tried to protect her from him, always making sure he didn't do anything that can hurt their friend. Somehow, Yonghwa understood how they felt. He was the one who broke her heart after all. Something his band members always reminded her not to do but he did it anyway.

     “Imagine what she'll feel if she watches that ing interview. Not to mention the anti-fans who will surely have a field day with it. Making sure to use it against her,” Jonghyun continued with his rant. “But you never really cared, right?” he asked, clearly disgusted with him.

     Both of them know the topic of Shinhye was off limits when it comes to Seohyun. His name, Seohyun’s and Shinhye’s name together in an article will surely catch anyone’s attention. It has been the case for the past six years. Park Shinhye, being his close friend and has been his co-star on two dramas, and Seohyun, being his wife in a virtual marriage show. Both have been rumored to be his girlfriend. He was aware of how Seohyun has always been getting hate when news of both of them dating are published.

     “Stop that, you two,” said Bruce, their manager. “Yonghwa, I hope your statement will not give us problems in the future. He gave him a pointed look and turned to Jonghyun. “Calm down before you punch him.”

     Jonghyun looked at him with blazing eyes. “He deserves it.”

     “Stop.” Their manager’s voice was stern, clearly having enough. “Jonghyun, get ready to go. Yonghwa, you too.”

     “You just can’t stop yourself, can you? You just have to sink the knife deeper every time.” He passed by him, intentionally bumping his shoulders in the process, to pick up his bag. “I’ll find my way home.”

     Jonghyun walked out of the room without another word, shutting the door loudly. Their manager shook his head and went after him after telling Yonghwa to get ready to go. He was left alone with their stylist and at the same time, make-up artist, Eunji, who was busy arranging her things.

     Yonghwa sat down the couch and sighed. He knew he handled the situation regarding Seohyun during the show the wrong way. Super Junior member Kyuhyun, also one of the hosts of the show, who happened to be a close sunbae and friend and friend of Seohyun, was also looking like he wanted to throw him out of his show earlier. He couldn’t blame him if he did. Seohyun was like a sister to his bandmates, a sister they were very protective off after everything that happened between them. Because of the news that him and Seohyun have been secretly dating for the past few years, he had to do something to divert and clear the news. He did it in an impulse, without thinking. Somehow, Yonghwa felt that he just made things worse.

     “What do you think, Noona?” he asked the stylist who has just finished packing her tings. “Do you think I made a mistake?”

     Eunji looked at him with understanding on her eyes and a kind smile, but didn't answer his question.

     Her silence meant he did. Yonghwa sighed and rubbed his face. What a mess he just made. Instead of protecting Seohyun, he did something that will bring more hate to her.

     “You’ll be fine,” Eunji said when he sighed again.

     Somehow, he doubted that.

     Jonghyun wasn’t on their service van when he entered, like he expected. Although he hated fighting with , it was best to not be together at the moment. Jonghyun was angry at him. It would do them no good sitting in the car together and not speaking.

     “I know you’re trying you’re best not to be linked to her again but that was just a low blow. You could have just avoided the question if you were going to give some thoughtless answer like that.” It was clear their manager also didn’t like what he did, like everyone else. “This can bring us more problems,” Bruce continued, frustration clear his voice.

     As much as Bruce didn’t want him involved in any scandal, he knew Bruce was more worried for Seohyun than the scandal itself. Like the rest of s, their manager was also very fond of Seohyun. As much as possible, he tried his best so that Seohyun won’t be harmed by him. Sometimes, he felt that s and his manager, even his parents, prefer him to be harmed instead of Seohyun. It wasn’t exactly true. But when it comes to Seohyun and him, they will always choose her over him.

     Yonghwa leaned on the headrest and closed his eyes, not feeling the need to say anything. He didn’t have any valid reason for doing what he did. He knew what he did was wrong. He thought of what might Seohyun think. Although Yonghwa was sure she won’t be reading the news or will be watching his interview, he was sure that a lot of fans will mention it on her own social media account. Her Eonnis will also surely hear it. She will be hurt. That he was sure. The thought just made feel like an even more.

     This was the first time he bluntly denied their dating rumors. In the past, when they were still dating and even when haven’t started dating yet, Yonghwa always avoided the question and just answered that they were friends. The blunt denial and his harsh words will surely make headlines. A lot will twist his words, if it can hurt more than that.

‘I should really throw these away’

     Seohyun has just finished changing her clothes and was now staring at a shirt hanging in her closet. It was just one of the couple shirts they owned. She ran her hand on the shirt and smiled sadly. After a moment, Seohyun shook her head and mentally reminded herself to clean her closet when she gets home from China. The couple shirts were just part of the memories she needed to finally throw away.  

     She was about to get out when something in her closet caught her attention. It was a small box that was tucked away under the hanged clothes. Frowning, she went to reach for it and walked over to her bed.

     ‘What is this?’

     She was reminded of what was it when she opened and saw what was in the box. It was the story book she was making. She remembered how she was very excited to finish it but then there was no need to finish it so she put it aside until she forgot about it. It was supposed to be a gift for Yonghwa.

     Seohyun picked the story book and opened it to the last set of picture she was able to add. It was when they had one of their dates at Namsam Tower. They looked so happy and contented watching the city lights. Yonghwa was his usual playful but sweet self. She remembered feeling lucky and thankful for having moments like that despite the kind of life they were living. Looking at the pictures, she thought that maybe they were so happy that time because when they came back down, it would all be over. It was like life gave her one last chance to experience that kind of happines. Again, she smiled bitterly. She had been doing that a lot lately. And she hated herself for it. she wished she could just forget all the things and start over. Without all the bitterness inside of her.

     You’re doing better Seohyun. Just keep moving forward. You'll be completely okay without you even realizing it.

     “Joohyun?” Sunny, one of her member, called out outside her room.

     Startled, she dropped the book. “Ne Eonni?”

     “We’re going to be late for our flight,” Sunny reminded her.

     She almost forgot they were supposed to be at the airport in an hour. “Ne Eonni. I’ll be there in a second.”

     Looking at the box, she took a deep breath. Seohyun realized she really had a lot throw away. Again, she mentally added to her to do list when she gets back. She picked up the book and put it again in the box then put it under her bed.

     All of her members seemed to be busy doing something when Soehyun got out from her room. It was a little suspicious. She was expecting them to tell be ready to go and tell her to hurry up.

     “What?” she asked, eyeing al