“Are you serious? You’re kicking me out of the apartment again?” I asked, slightly raising my voice as I clenched my cell phone tighter in my hand. I’ve noticed that I received a couple of stares from the customers that were in the bookstore. I gave a sheepish smile to them, hoping that I didn’t disrupt their reading and continued on, “Jonghyun, this is the third time this week that you’ve brought a girl over… and each time it’s a different one!” I said quietly, but I made sure that he heard that I was clearly upset about the situation.

I sighed as I listened to my roommate, (and best friend) Jonghyun’s shallow apologies and how he’ll promise to introduce me to beautiful women as well, blah blah, “Okay okay fine. You’re lucky I have closing for tonight though. But when I come back around 11, I better not walk in during your freak fest.”  

I hung up the phone, returning back to my dead end job of organizing books at the local book store. Okay, well it’s not exactly a dead end job because I love being surrounded by books. I love reading new things, and I usually have a great memory, so whatever I read or whatever I see, it usually gets embedded into my brain.

Sighing again for the thousandth time that night, I pondered about what Jonghyun promised me. He said that he would introduce me to women, but then again, I’ve heard those excuses plenty of times before, and besides, I can talk to any women… it’s just that I don’t have the capabilities like him to actually be with a women in that type of way.

I’ve always had a way with words when it comes to them because I’ve learn from the best, my mother, herself. She taught me how to treat them right, how to talk to them, everything! And every single time all the women I’ve encountered fell for my tricks, but they never see me in that kind of way. It’s like they can never take me seriously and every time I would ask to go on a date, it would only be a “friend” date. They would always coo at me saying, “Awee you’re so cute!” But I don’t want to be considered cute… I can be y too!

Yeah, I’m only best friend material. Not anything close to boyfriend or husband material (but I’m thinking way ahead of myself if it’s about marriage).

I ordered the books alphabetically on the shelf, but it was at that moment I’ve realized what section I was at: the motherly/maternity section of the book store. I picked up the book titled, “100 Steps to Dealing Caring for Pregnant Woman”. I assumed that this book was supposed to be a comedy, but informative book in which the husband knows how to deal with the long nine stressful months of their wife’s pregnancy. I scanned through the pages and stopped at a random part, chuckling at the topic when it comes to woman’s mood swings and bizarre craving for strange food.

I thought to myself, women love it if you know how to take care of children… Too bad I’m so awkward around kids- especially after what happened to that cute puppy I had years ago when I was younger; should have never picked him up, especially when my childhood nick name was “butterfingers”.

I then proceeded to the next pages, which ranges from topics of the right materials to buy for your child, what you should not do while your wife is pissed off, but all of a sudden, from my right, I felt someone tapping my shoulder, jumping a bit, I turned towards the person.

It turned out to be quite a pretty boy actually. He had platinum blond hair, a pretty feminine face, with only a tinge of masculinity present, and a slim figure- it was pretty shocking of how similar it was to a woman’s.

I stared at him like an idiot, which caused him to a brow at me, staring at me as if I was crazy, “Um…” He spoke up.

I finally snapped out of my day dream, “Ah, yes, m-may I help you?”

He pointed to the book I was reading earlier, “Do you think I can take a look at that for a moment?”

I stared at the book in my hands dumbfounded, but took too long until I heard an impatient “Well?” coming out of his lips. I handed it to him slowly, curious as to why he would want to look at a book like that. He looked fairly young, but does that mean he’s some sort of father? I became upset at that, even though it’s just an assumption, the fact that I thought that even this pretty boy could get with women over me was just pathetic- on my behalf.

The boy flipped through the pages slowly, scanning the pages with concentrated eyes. It was as if he was trying to retain the details of the pages, but I noticed a hint of confusion on his face. It was like he was forcing himself to know the material. I decided to stop staring at him in order to stop looking like a creeper and picked up another book, opening to a random page, I read:

“.... Okay buddy, In order to prepare for your wife, if she is giving birth early, is to first, stop screaming and calm down. I know you’re not a doctor, and you can’t help, but be nervous and scared during this type of situation, but panicking is not going to do anything. First you have to call the hospital, so that as you’re preparing for birth, they’ll be able to arrive there earlier. Then, you must place her on a bed, or lay out a number of sheets and towels underneath her so that she could give birth. Have a bucket of water and towels ready beside you. Make sure to tell her to breath regularly, in order for her to relax to prevent any further pain as the newborn comes out. When she’s ready, tell her to push, having your hands ready in order to catch the newborn when they come out. If the doctors arrive by then, let them handle it from there. Once you hear the cries of your child, you are now considered a proud father! Congratulations!”

I closed the book slowly and placed it back on the shelf… weird. When I faced my right, I noticed the pretty boy still there, looking at me, “Ah, yes?”

“Do you think I can buy this?” He asked.

I nodded my head, “Sure, let me ring you up at the cashier,” and made my way to the front, taking one of the cash registers. I took the book, scanning it, “Okay sir, it’ll be 13,500 won.”

He took out this, what it looked like, handmade cat wallet, opening it, and took out wrinkled bills. He counted the exact change carefully, looking over the money in his hands over and over again before finally handing it to me.

“So, you’re going to be a father soon?” I asked, smiling, making room for small talk.

He ended up glaring at me, “It’s not any of your concern,” he bluntly replied and handed me the money before he snatched the bag away and trudged out of the store.

I frowned, was that a bad thing to say? Then again, mama never taught me how to talk to guys- which explains my lack of guy friends.

After my long shift at work, it was finally closing time, saying my goodbyes to my co-workers, I took off, first heading towards my favorite late night local sandwich shop. I walked in, hearing the familiar ring whenever a customer walks in. The owners of the store happily greeted me, “Jinki! Hello my favorite customer, just the usual today?”

I nodded taking my seat on the counter. As I waited, I fiddled with my fingers, looking around the store, it was pretty empty and I looked at my watch. 11:10pm. Hm… Jonghyun should be done getting his freak on by now, then again he does last quite some time.

My food finally arrived, delicious- a chicken sandwich accompanied with dill pickles marinated in teriyaki sauce. Does that sound strange? Well it’s good you should try it! Anyway, I destroyed that sandwich in less than ten bites, but I took my time eating the pickles. It was a great way to finish off the meal.

 I heard the ring to the door, and casually turned my head behind me and spotted, what it looks like to be a foreigner. I couldn’t see the face because she quickly took her seat on one of the tables, but she had beautiful blond shining hair, curves of an angel, slim legs- she almost resembles a Barbie doll! Not only that, but she wore a lot of pink, like Barbie.

 I- I think I’m in love guys.

Oh, you think it’s too soon?

Well, yeah, screw you, mama says that if you think that you’ve found the one, then you should never let her get away, which I don’t intend for her to slip away from me. I watched one of the waitress walk up to her, taking her order and then walking away. When the waitress left, the Barbie girl took out a cat wallet, how familiar, and began counting the money, and from the looks of it, she seems pretty loaded. Besides I think foreigners are pretty rich to begin with since she could afford to travel here.

The waitress later returned with a milkshake, laying it on her table before my love I mean, the beautiful woman started to leave after she paid. I almost chocked my last pickle seeing how she was leaving already. I quickly ran out after her, forgetting to pay for my meal.

Boy, was she quick, I only figured that she was still near the store, but she’s already a block ahead of me. As soon as I caught up with her, I felt my heart beating fast, I was getting so nervous and my palms were sweaty. But I tapped on her shoulder, putting on my best smile that I was known for, “Why, hello miss-“

Right when she turned around, I finally saw her face.

There was a sense of familiarity- there was a tinge of masculinity on her face. She only glared at me, but her eyes widen as soon as she saw me.

The beautiful woman I fell in love with at first sight, actually turned out to be the pretty boy earlier from the shop.

“—ter?!”

He suddenly pushed me away, running passed me and making a turn on the corner of the street.

He disappeared.

I sighed, standing there at that same spot thinking of how stupid I was. I don’t know what’s stranger: the fact that the pretty boy I saw earlier was cross-dressing, or the fact that even when I saw his face, he still completely blew me away. My heart’s still beating guys and I don’t know if that’s a good or bad thing.

I finally came to my senses and suddenly remembered that I didn’t pay, so I quickly made my way back to the store, “Sorry for running out like that,” I said to the owner.

He only smiled, “It’s okay.”

I reached in for my back pocket to feel for my wallet, but I noticed something strange.

My wallet disappeared.

I looked in my front pocket, my jacket, even my shoe, but my wallet was gone. I swore I had it when I first walked into the store because I always placed my wallet in my left back pocket. It only disappeared when-

When that I went after that Barbie boy.

I smiled sheepishly at the owner, “Um…” I gulped, “Hyung, do you take any I.O.U.’s?” 

----------

Haha omg. This is totally a crackfic, but I assure you that this DOES have a story line. Most of the things in the first chapter aren't completely random. And no, I don't suggest for you to try pickles marinated in teriyaki. I am not technically fond of pickels myself, so bleh-- Anyway, yeah I hope you enjoy! Thank you for reading/subscribing/commenting! I love you all~!