“I remember my first kiss,” Junhui told them all. They’d been discussing the topic for a few seconds, just because Jeonghan and Jisoo had ditched them to kiss (because apparently it was too romantic not to). And then Mingyu, looking at Wonwoo like he wanted to do the same, had told them the story of his first kiss.

Jihoon groaned, and got up to grab a drink. He hadn’t been happy with the conversation from the beginning. Seungcheol had begun to explain why, but had got a slap on the back of the head before he got his point across.

“Me too,” Minghao piped in. Junhui looked at him in surprise. Minghao rolled his eyes.

“Did you think I was completely innocent?” Minghao asked, raising an eyebrow.

“No,” Junhui denied furiously. Minghao smiled at him teasingly, and Junhui’s breath caught in his throat.

Xu Minghao just so happened to be the most perfect person in the entire universe. His eyes held the universe, and his laugh was the sound of a million fairies. Or at least Junhui thought so (in a best friend, and totally platonic, way). The two had been best friends for as long as anyone could remember.

“One of you tell us,” Mingyu demanded, throwing popcorn at them. Junhui thought about it.

His first kiss had been in the dark. It was at a party he had dragged Minghao to, and then immediately lost him. He regretted it a little, but he’d had some alcohol, and found himself in a darkened room with someone else who’d probably had a little as well.

It hadn’t been the perfect first kiss, it was sloppy and awkward, with teeth hitting against each other. But Junhui had thrown himself into it, and he still wondered who it had been with, he didn’t even remember whether they were a boy or a girl. But it had ended with the host’s family coming home and their father telling everyone to “get out his ing house before he called the police”. He’d got up and left, but not before he walked into the door in his alcohol induced state, making the person he’d just kissed laugh under their breath. Junhui had flipped them off and gone to find Minghao.

“Well it was at this party someone had dragged me too,” Minghao said, gesturing at Junhui with a raised eyebrow. Junhui shrugged. He had taken Minghao to a lot of parties, insisting that he didn’t want to go alone, and anyway Minghao always enjoyed it when he got there.

“And there was alcohol. So I had some, being the rebellious fifteen year old I obviously was,” Minghao continued, with a little bit of regret. Junhui remembered nights where he and Minghao had gone back to his house after parties, and just sat outside in his garden, pointing at the stars and complaining. Most of these times they had had a bit of alcohol. They were never quite drunk, but sometimes they were closer to it than others.

Those were the nights Junhui would openly stare at his best friend, memorising his profile in the dark, noting his half smile whenever he talked about something Junhui had done. Sometimes Minghao would stare back, and the conversation would trail off until one of them looked away.

“Somehow I ended up in a dark room, with someone, god knows who. Then I think someone said something, I don’t remember, and then we started kissing,” Minghao ended. Junhui frowned. That sounded familiar, but he had dragged Minghao to a lot of parties.

Then Minghao laughed. “But when he left he walked into this massive lamp.” Junhui froze. Xu Minghao had been his first kiss? His best friend? He swore a little under his breath as he remembered how bad he’d been, he’d definitely improved since then.

He felt people looking at him and Minghao cleared his throat. He looked up to see Minghao smirking at him. “Got something to add?” he asked.
Junhui laughed a little. “He flipped you off when he heard you laughing.” He regretted it immediately (but kind of didn’t because Minghao’s eyes hardened a little, and damn if that expression didn’t make him feel a little weak).

“Yeah he did,” Minghao said, frowning.

“I’m bored,” Seungkwan announced, not seeming to feel the suddenly tense atmosphere, and Hansol started putting the marshmallow he was melting into Seungkwan’s hair.
Everyone turned their attention to Seungkwan hitting Hansol and Hansol laughing through it. But Minghao kept looking at Junhui with narrowed eyes.

When Chan started yawning about twenty minutes later, they all got into the tents to go to sleep.

It was bizarrely awkward between Junhui and Minghao. They didn’t mention the kiss, but it hung in the air, causing a tension between them. Junhui stole glances at his best friend, who looked a little shellshocked, out the corner of his eye. They were silent as they got into their sleeping bags, and the silence continued until Junhui couldn’t stand it anymore.

“I’ve improved,” he said. If possible the tension thickened.

Minghao was silent for a few seconds. “I have too,” he muttered.

They didn’t talk again that night. But in the morning Junhui woke up, and the first thing he saw was Xu Minghao, cuddled in right under his nose. One of them had apparently been cold during the night, and they were in quite a small tent.

Junhui had been uncomfortable the night before, but he didn’t want to move, so he just stared at Minghao. The younger had a peaceful expression on his face, his lips together in a slight pout. They were slightly chapped, the light pink sometimes going darker where he had bitten them. Thinking about Minghao biting his lips took Junhui’s mind in a slightly different direction, but he dragged it back so he could continue to stare at Minghao (in a one hundred percent platonic way, with absolutely no wish to kiss those lightly chapped lips). His cheeks had a hint of a blush on the smooth skin, a colour Junhui could find nowhere else (he’d never looked to see it in the world around it, best friends don’t do that).
His eyelashes were fluttering slightly, and Junhui watched in fascination as the boy’s eyes slowly opened, revealing his eyes.

Minghao was awake, he suddenly realised. And he was still curled into Junhui. And Junhui was still staring at his best friend (in a totally best friend and no more way). And he was blinking sleepily trying to work out where he was. Then Junhui saw him remember what had happened the night before, and shrink away a little, frowning.

Junhui frowned too. He couldn’t believe his first kiss had been Minghao. He’d sworn to himself never to kiss Minghao, because if he kissed him, Junhui wasn’t sure he would ever kiss anyone else. And that was something he didn’t want to face, because Minghao was straight (and so was Junhui….. most of the time, when Minghao wasn’t around), and Junhui didn’t think that Minghao would want to stay kissing Junhui and no one else, because Minghao had an advantage over everyone else in the world, due to the masterpiece of colour and shape that was his face.

Minghao cleared his throat. “Um, good morning.” His morning voice was gruffer than normal.

Junhui realised he hadn’t stopped staring. “Good morning,” he replied, trying to pretend like he hadn’t tried to memorise what Minghao looked like in his sleep.

Seungkwan burst into their tent. “Time to get up!” he yelled, before immediately leaving again.

Minghao looked around them, but Junhui stayed sitting there thinking. How could Minghao have improved? He’d never told Junhui about any potential kissing partners. Junhui told him everything (and had on more than one occasion sobbed in the other’s arms over a particularly shattering ex). Did Minghao not trust him?

“Hey,” Junhui started, without thinking. Minghao turned to look at him questioningly. Junhui regretted saying anything, but he had to know, and he thought suddenly of his old cat Mimei, who curiosity really did kill (she tried to chase a car to find out where it would go. It turned out it was reversing into a parking space).

“You mentioned improving last night?” Junhui continued.

Minghao looked away quickly. “Jun please don’t.”

But he kept talking. “No but, who have you kissed?”

Minghao raised his eyebrow. “I’m not as innocent as you seem to think Jun.”

Junhui shook his head. “I’m serious Hao. You never told me about even liking anyone before and now you've improved in kissing?”

Minghao scoffed. “I hope you have too, that was a first kiss,” he said, annoyed.

“It wasn’t a great first kiss for me either!” Junhui argued.

“It’s a good thing I’ve improved then,” Minghao said, half focusing on something else. (What he could be focussing on was beyond Junhui, they were in a very small tent.)

Junhui groaned. “Seriously Hao.”

Minghao looked at him right in the eye. “Do you think I won't have improved?” he asked. Junhui gulped. Something in Minghao’s voice told him not to push it, but he had to know.

“Just tell me, Ha-”

He was cut off by Minghao, but not by speech. Instead Junhui found Minghao kissing him.

The boy hadn’t been lying. He’d improved. But Junhui wasn’t focussing on that. He was focussing on the fact that Xu Minghao had kissed him for the second time, and this time he was fully conscious.

But just as Junhui had relaxed into it, Minghao pulled away. He was smirking slightly.

“Still don’t think I’ve improved?” Minghao asked. Junhui didn’t move. “Jun?” Minghao asked. A worried tone entered his voice, as Junhui continued to just stare blankly. “Junhui,” Minghao said sharply, hitting Junhui a little. The shock of the hit and Minghao calling him by his full name brought Junhui out of his trance.

He turned to stare at the younger boy, who was beginning to look like he regretted kissing him.

“I’m sorry, Jun. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I won’t kiss you again, I promise,” Minghao said, but Junhui still didn’t speak. Minghao frowned. “I know I’m not that bad, come on actually say something.”

“Did you just kiss me?” Junhui asked, but he seemed more surprised than horrified. Minghao nodded slowly.

“If it makes you feel any better, I didn’t wake up this morning and think ‘better kiss Jun again’,” Minghao tried to assure him.

Maybe Minghao didn’t think that that morning, but Junhui thought that he was definitely going to be thinking about kissing Minghao every morning.

“You definitely improved,” Junhui told him. Minghao smiled slightly, and moved as if to move away from sitting in front of his best friend, when Junhui grabbed his arm and pulled him back to face him.

“What?” Minghao asked.

“Why did you do that?” Junhui asked him. Minghao looked nervous.

“I was trying to prove a point,” he said, his voice shaking slightly.

“I think you proved a point,” Junhui said, not thinking about how Minghao had improved.

Minghao laughed. “You were beginning to scare me a little, Jun,” he confessed. Junhui smiled at him (definitely not thinking about pulling Minghao a little closer and kissing him again). They sat like that for a few minutes before Jihoon stuck his head into their tent this time.

“Hurry the up, s,” he said. Jihoon wasn’t exactly a morning person. Minghao and Junhui left the tent, and their conversation behind, but Junhui couldn’t quite forget about how much he wanted to kiss his best friend.

And how maybe he did love Minghao in a way that wasn’t totally platonic.