These Walls That Separate Us

Hold Me Closer

Disclaimer: I know almost nothing about the criminal system in either Korea or in the US. Therefore I will be making my own system (with a mix of them both, plus other stuff to fill in for what I don't know)

I also don't know the meanings of flowers beyond google, so things might not be totally accurate.

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The clicking of the guard’s heels against the smooth tile echoed against the narrow hallway as Soonyoung followed closely behind. Soonyoung walked in silence, his sneakers only giving off a slight squeak every once in a while, but otherwise quiet. The small bouquet of flowers he bought not long ago brushed against his thigh, and his grip on it tightened. He felt anxious, as he always did on official grounds, but also felt a sense of relief that he was finally going to see him again. That he was going to see his love again.

 

The guard stopped in front of a small room and gestured for Soonyoung to enter. The blond bowed his head as he passed the guard to enter. When he straightened his position he looked in the room, halved by a wall of glass. On the other side of it were two people. One was another guard, and the other was the one Soonyoung came for. The one he longed to see again. Lee Seokmin.

 

There was a soft click as the door closed behind him, but Soonyoung didn’t take note of it. In front of him was the one he held so dear. He could see Seokmin on the other side of the glass, and the guard off to the side of the room. The bouquet nearly slipped from his fingers when his fingers lost tension, but he managed to firmly grip it before he let it go. He could feel his insides shake slightly from excitement and anxiety. It had been a while since they had spoken, after all.

 

Seokmin was sitting, dressed in the usual dull blue jumpsuit with his name clearly written on his left chest pocket. The room he was in wasn’t brightly lit, but that didn’t stop him from being radiant himself. He showed his loving and dazzling smile as always, and Soonyoung had to swallow hard to prevent tears from forming. It was hard seeing Seokmin on the other side of that wall. He wasn’t supposed to be there. He didn’t belong there… yet there he was. He was there in plain view, but Soonyoung couldn’t hold him no matter how much he wanted to. It seemed like they were so far away from each other because of the obstacle between them.

 

It’s only a glass wall that is separating us. Nothing more. A thin glass wall.

 

Soonyoung bit his bottom lip to calm himself down, and then walked up to the glass and sat down on the chair provided. It was rusted, and the seat cushion was tearing, but it wasn’t as bad as the chairs he had at home. He settled into the cushy seat and held out the bouquet of purple flowers. He let out a smile, hiding any sign of sorrow.

 

“Happy anniversary, Seokmin.”

 

Seokmin clapped his hands lightly after letting an exaggerated sigh escape.

 

“Oh, you remembered!”

 

That was enough to give Soonyoung a huge sense of relief. He chuckled away the nervousness. It was almost magical how just hearing Seokmin’s voice was enough to make him feel at ease. Enough to make him feel safe. Enough to make him feel at home. He immediately felt relaxed and like himself again.

 

“Of course I did! It’s the only thing marked on my calendar. That and your birthday. Those are the only important days in my life, really.”

 

Seokmin blushed slightly, giggling at the comment, holding the back of his hand against his mouth as he did so. He then glanced at the vibrant flowers again.

 

“Anemones,” he said softly. “Anticipation.”

 

“Because I was anticipating this visit. I wanted to see you, you know. I’ve been waiting for the day they accepted visitors. And also... I’m anticipating the day your appeal is successful. That they’ll finally declare you innocent. They have to.”

 

Seokmin’s smile showed a hint of pain for a second.

 

“Yeah.”

 

Soonyoung noticed the momentary change of the air, and decided to change the subject. He placed the bouquet on his lap and tried lifting the mood with some good news.

 

“I enrolled in a university.”

 

Seokmin raised his eyebrows as a smile tugged at his lips.

 

“Really? That’s great! That means you got your GED? When did that happen?”

 

Soonyoung looked down at the bouquet and played with a leaf. The sound of the plastic crinkling filled the temporary pause. With his chin pointed down, he looked up bashfully at Seokmin.

 

“Not that long ago. I didn’t tell you about it in case I didn’t end up passing the entrance exam. It would have been for nothing if I didn’t get into a university” he said quietly.

 

Seokmin chuckled at Soonyoung’s shyness. “Congratulations! This is a big deal! Our Soonyoungie is going to go to college! Have you told anyone else yet? Your tutor?”

 

“You mean Jihoon? It sounds so weird when you call him my tutor…”

 

Seokmin laughed again. “Anyways, have you told him?”

 

“Of course not. I wanted you to be the first to know.”

 

“Aww, I’m touched.”

 

“What do you expect? You’re the most important to me… don’t tell me you forgot…”

 

Soonyoung sulked a bit. He was half joking, but also half serious. When Seokmin realized his sincerity, he reached forward, but his fingers stopped at the glass. He couldn’t reach out any further because of the thin, yet burdensome barrier. He flattened his hand so that his palm pressed against it.

 

“Of course not,” he replied gently. “You’re the most important to me, too”

 

Seeing Seokmin’s loving expression caused Soonyoung’s chest to tighten. He reached for the glass, mirroring Seokmin until their hands were pressed against each other with only the glass in between them.

 

“I… I’ll wait for you… even if they give you an unfair verdict...”

 

“You don’t have to. If you find happiness somewhere else, I don’t want to hold you back.”

 

“There’s no way that will happen. I can promise you that.”
 

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”

 

Soonyoung furrowed his eyebrows, and his voice gained a hint of sternness when he responded. He glared harshly at the boy across from him.


“Don’t underestimate how much I care about you. I’ll wait for you, no matter how long it takes.”

 

“And what if it takes forever?”

 

“Then I’ll wait forever.”

 

The two looked at each other, and it almost seemed as if the glass disappeared for a moment. In that short moment of time, the two really looked at each other, and nothing could break them apart. Until a hand appeared on Seokmin’s shoulder.

 

Both boys glanced up at the owner of the hand, and it was the guard that had been occupying Seokmin’s side of the room.

 

“Your time’s up. He can visit again tomorrow.”

 

Seokmin removed his hand from the glass first, sighing. It was hard for Soonyoung to see him with a dejected expression.

 

“Can I hope to see you again tomorrow?”

 

Soonyoung dropped his hand as well. “Yeah.”

 

“I’ll miss you.”

“I miss you already.”

 

“I love you, Soonyoung.”

 

“I love you more than anything.”

 

Seokmin smiled at the response and stood up from the chair. A harsh sound came from the legs of the chair scraping against the tile floor.

 

“Come on,” said the guard as he cuffed Seokmin’s hands together to the front.

 

The two headed toward the door, and just before Seokmin exited, he glanced back once more. He flashed his signature bright smile before disappearing around the corner, as if to reassure Soonyoung that he would be okay.

 

Soonyoung remained seated for a few minutes. He could hear the guard behind him tapping his foot in impatience, so he stood up to leave. Carrying the bouquet carefully against his chest, he walked up to the guard.

 

“Is there any way I can get these to him?”

 

The guard shook his head.

 

“I’m sorry, but no can do.”

 

It was the answer Soonyoung expected, but he was still disappointed in hearing it.

 

“Then I don’t have a reason for them anymore. Would you like them?”

 

The guard seemed surprised for a moment, but his expression soon returned to normal as he cleared his throat.

 

“Well, if you don’t want them, I suppose I can take them.”

 

Soonyoung showed a small smile and he handed the bouquet to the guard. He looked at the guard’s name tag.

 

“Hmm? Kwon? Your surname is Kwon, too?”

 

The guard looked down at his name tag, then back at Soonyoung, He pointed a finger at the name tag as a tiny smile became evident on his face.

 

“You’re a Kwon?”

 

Soonyoun extended his right hand toward the guard.

 

“Kwon Soonyoung. Nice to meet you.”

 

The guard accepted the gesture, reaching out his own hand to grasp Soonyoung’s.

 

“Kwon Geonwoo.”

 

They kept their introductions as short as that, and Geonwoo began to lead Soonyoung out to the entrance of the prison. This time, Soonyoung walked to his side instead of behind him. The halls could barely fit the two of them, but it seemed awkward to follow behind Geonwoo when they now knew each other’s names.

 

“So, Soonyoung.”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Lee Seokmin...”

 

“He’s my lover.”

 

“That much I figured. What I haven’t been able to figure out, is why he’s here in the first place. Seokmin, he… he doesn’t seem like a criminal.”

 

Soonyoung wasn’t sure how much he should tell him. His hand clenched around the bottom of his shirt, no doubt leaving wrinkles. He felt wronged when Geonwoo said “Seokmin” and “criminal” in the same sentence, but he knew it wasn’t his fault for not knowing anything.

 

“He’s not.”

 

“Then-”

“He’s not a criminal.”

 

He made it clear that he wasn’t going to explain more than that. Geonwoo sighed as he fumbled with the keys on his belt, trying to find the one to unlock the door in front of them.

 

“I understand. I won’t ask. Are you going to visit again tomorrow?”

 

“Of course.”

 

Geonwoo was able to find the right key and unlocked the door with ease. He opened the door wide for Soonyoung to pass.

 

“Then I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said with a smile.

 

Soonyoung bowed before he passed through the open doors.

 

“Oh,” said Geonwoo suddenly. Soonyoung turned around to look at him.

 

Geonwoo held up the bouquet of anemones.

 

“Thanks for these.”


Soonyoung bowed once again, then left without saying anything more.

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Note: There is another darker meaning to anemones, and that is "fading hope"

The next chapters will start explaining their past, and eventually, we will find out how things came to this. I hope this is interesting...

 

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Comments

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nayaka
#1
this is one of my favorite seoksoon fic ㅠㅠ i do really love this fic ㅠㅠ i hope you'll continue this story, authornim! it such a waste if you leave this story just like this huhuhu
Hoshua #2
Author nim please update I miss your story so much ㅠㅠ
iamautumn #3
Chapter 8: i wonder if this story will continue. i miss reading old soonseok fanfics anyway TT
iamautumn #4
Chapter 8: How I wish you could update fast but I know you're busy too so I feel really glad whenever you're updating this story. Thanks author-nim ^^
Uchimouchi #5
Chapter 8: Thank you for your update
Hoshua #6
Chapter 7: I miss your update TT_TT
iamautumn #7
Chapter 7: whoa i miss your update T.T sooo soonyoung and jihoon both live in loneliness i guess what about seokmin? :)
AHSILLY #8
Chapter 5: Little angsty and i cant help but wish for a happy ending for both of them :') beautiful story so far
iamautumn #9
Chapter 5: I really want to know why Seokmin was imprisoned. Hayyss this story gives different vibes on me. I always feel the dark aura wile reading every chapter but I kinda like this kind of story . Emotional.
Nightsstar
#10
Chapter 4: Dang, I always love the concept of using flowers to tell something, to convey emotions couldn't put up or say directly in words. I think it's a lovely way to confess ;A; Aww our Seokmin-ie is so whipped~ Very direct huh? I love it XD At least Soonyoung knows what exactly Seokmin wants from him, it looks innocent and genuine by the way. Love where this is going. :'))