“So here’s the plan.” Himchan folds his arms. The four of us are sitting in the Galmegi, glasses of whiskey in front of us (Yongguk looked like he was about to rip my head off when he saw me downing my first glass in one go. I had to remind him that no, I was not 14 anymore, and yes, I drank.) “We contact the rest of the BAP members and explain what’s going on. If they decide to cool, fine. If they don’t...,”

“Wait.” Yongguk furrows his eyebrows. “Why’re we limiting this to BAP members? Why don’t we contact all of our old allies?”

Himchan, Zelo, and I exchange hesitant glances.

“Well... would they be willing to help us?” Zelo asks hesitantly. “We didn’t want to involve all those people, I guess.”

“I mean, we have their CRP files,” I say. “But even if we told them the truth about why the CRP was created, would they want to leave their new lives? Even you didn’t want to at first.”

“It’s worth a shot,” Yongguk shrugs.

“We need to be careful of who we ask, though,” Himchan says warily. “What if someone tips off Suho that we’re gathering everyone from the CRP?”

I bristle. “What if he already knows?”

“,” Zelo swears. “Is there a way for us to find out?”

“If they knew, they would’ve probably sent BTS after our asses already,” Himchan snorts.

“Who’s BTS?” Yongguk asks.

Himchan, Zelo, and I burst out raucous into laughter.

“Oh, boy, do we have a story to tell you,” Zelo chortles.

“Well, I hope I can listen to it over milkshakes and fries at the Caramel Cafe.” Yongguk gets up, stretches out his arms. “Damn, I’ve missed this place. I wonder how Jandi’s doing.”

“She’s so tall now!” I exclaim as we head on down the street. “And she’s so pretty.”

“She didn’t even know who you were at first,” Zelo snorts. “What if she does that to you, Yongguk?”

“Then I’ll have no choice but to give her an old-fashioned noogie,” Yongguk replies solemnly.

“Stop!” I laugh, opening the door to the Caramel Cafe. “You can’t-,”

I stiffen.

Jandi is perched on a tall chair behind the counter, rolling her eyes as Jimin- Jimin- chatters away to her, his eyes bright.

When he sees me with Himchan, Zelo, and Yongguk, he freezes.

It takes a few moments for Zelo and Himchan to register who he is.

The next thing I know, they have whipped out their guns and are shouting, “Don’t move!” at Jimin.

“Stop it, guys!” I shout, batting their arms away, as Yongguk confusedly stares at Jimin and Jandi shrieks, “What the hell?” and Jimin just sits there, a half-baked expression on his face.

“Are you kidding me?” Himchan says. “That’s Jimin! From BTS! Get away from Jandi, you bastard!”

“Can you calm down?!” Jandi yells, angrily stomping from her seat to the four of us. She looks mad. “Don’t bring your beef into this place! Just put your weapons down or I’m-,”

And then she spots Yongguk standing next to me.

“Yongguk?” she breathes, clapping her hands over .

Despite the tense situation we are in, I can’t resist snorting with derision. “Of course,” I mutter. “She recognizes you but she doesn’t recognize me.”

“Who could forget this handsome face?” Yongguk chuckles, giving Jandi a wide smile. “It’s been a while.”

“Oh my god!” Jandi throws her arms around him in an enormous hug. “Yongguk, I- oh my god, I’ve missed you so much!”

Her voice is thick with emotion. Yongguk’s eyes soften as he reciprocates her hug, gently patting her hair.

“I missed you, too, peanut butter.”

“Peanut- I don’t even like peanut butter anymore,” Jandi laughs, her voice muffled by the fact that her head is currently buried in Yongguk’s coat.

“What?! The infamous Han Jandi doesn’t like peanut butter? What universe are we living in?”

There’s something about this touching scene that causes Himchan and Zelo to lower their guns, my shoulders to slacken, the uneasy look on Jimin’s face to relax into a small smile.

“Jimin.” Jandi turns back. “I’m assuming you already know who Himchan, Zelo, and Lia are, but meet Yongguk. He was like my big brother way back in the day, before he decided to split and leave town.”

“I gave him plenty of for that already,” Himchan smirks. “I got you covered, Jandi.”

“Nice to know.”

“Wait, so...,” Yongguk narrows his eyes at Jimin. “You’re a member of BTS?”

Jimin shrugs. “I guess so.”

“But he’s cool,” I pipe up, meeting the quizzical looks Himchan and Zelo are giving me. “No, really. Jimin’s nice. Unlike some... other individuals in BTS.”

“See!” Jandi throws her hands up in the air in exasperation. “Why do you two have to be so quick to fight people?”

“Well, excuse me for trying to protect us all from someone who’s supposed to be our enemy,” Zelo snarks. “I didn’t know Lia was BFFs with him.”

I sigh. “I’ll explain later. But... Jimin’s fine.”

I still don’t trust him. But there’s no reason to fight him.

“So how do you two know each other?” Himchan asks Jandi, nodding toward Jimin.

Jandi laughs. “Are you kidding? Jimin’s been coming here for years.”

“What?” Zelo’s eyes shoot up. “Then how have we not seen him?”

Jimin and Jandi exchange an oddly mysterious smile, which causes my eyebrows to shoot up in surprise.

“I guess you’ve never looked hard enough,” Jimin says in a lilting tone.

“What the- what is that supposed to mean-,”

“Chill out!” I say, holding back Zelo. “Oh, man. Maybe we should come back another time.”

“Wait, Hyo. While you’re here.” Jimin stands up. “Have you heard anything about, uh, where Sora is?”

Himchan goes rigid next to me. A lump wells up in my throat.

“No, we haven’t,” I say softly. “We’re still looking. How about you guys?”

“Nope.” Jimin gives Jandi an unreadable look. “I don’t know where she could be. Her dad doesn’t know- even Suho doesn’t know.”

The mention of his name immediately causes me to bristle. “We’ll find her soon,” I say quietly.

Jimin nods. “Sora will be okay.”

“Jandi, can we get the usual?” Himchan asks, striding over to an empty table far away from Jimin.

“You got it.”

“So what now?” I say.

“We need to split up,” Himchan responds in a quiet voice, ensuring that Jimin does not hear us. “Yongguk, Zelo- you two work on contacting everyone from the CRP files. I’ll continue searching for Sora.”

“What about me?” I question.

“Okay, so I’ve been thinking. What if we went the traditional route and tried to collect evidence on current gang members, so we could report them and they could be arrested?”

I blink. “Whoa. Get the cops involved?”

“Yongguk is a cop,” Zelo points out.

“We would have to get the Seoul Police Department involved in this, though,” Yongguk says. “I’m part of the Daegu force. I’d definitely help, though, but I don’t know if I’d have the jurisdiction to make arrests.”

“But I do know people in the Seoul force,” I say, an idea blossoming in my mind. “Officer Hwang, my CRP caseworker- she’s trustworthy. I’m sure of it. If I tell her what’s going on, then she’ll be willing to fight for us.”

Himchan, Zelo, and Yongguk exchange uneasy glances.

“Are you sure?” Yongguk says.

“I... I think so. We’ll contact her tomorrow. For now, let’s rest. It’s been a long day.”

We spend the rest of the night chowing down on Caramel Cafe’s world-class burgers and fries. I finally break it to the boys that I don’t drink milkshakes (or eat ice cream, for that matter) anymore, and they almost have an aneurysm.

“See? People change,” Jandi remarks pointedly to Yongguk after hearing him shout, “Kim Lia doesn’t drink milkshakes?”

“Yeah, but this is like you and peanut butter!” Yongguk sputters. “This- that can’t be possible!”

“Poor Papa Yongguk,” Himchan’s lips curve up into a wide smile. “His kids are all grown up.”

It’s a fun night. Even Jimin ends up joining our conversation. Zelo and Himchan have formed a tentative tolerance of him.

They understandably do not like him.

But they simply accept his presence.

The six of us- me, Jandi, Jimin, Zelo, Yongguk, and Himchan- reminisce, recount hilarious stories of each other, revel in the warmth and pleasant atmosphere in the cafe. By the time I leave, I feel a lot better about the dangers I am facing.

Because I’ll have all these people to push through them with.

Unfortunately, the moment I arrive back at my dorm, the grin slides off my face.

Time to face the night.

I procrastinate sleeping. I clean my room, twice. I rearrange Sora’s things. I browse the Internet, attempting to search for articles that discuss KCC or Kim Sangyoon in a negative light. All I can find are articles heralding both of their achievements. My lip curls. Disgusting.

My body is getting wearier and wearier. But I can’t sleep. I don’t want to sleep.

I don’t want to face my dreams.

For the slightest moment- despite how hard I am fighting to keep him away from my mind- his face flickers into my vision.

    The way he gently tucked me under his chin, wrapped me in his blankets, lulled me to sleep.

    The sensation of his lips on the nape of my neck.

    The way he whispered comforting nothings into my ear until I drifted off into a peaceful slumber.

    Then a harsh voice rings out at me.

    Let’s make a bet, Hyo. Let’s see which one of us comes to the other first. When you’re at my door again, we’ll see which one of us needs the other more.

    A shudder runs through my body.

    I am pathetic. I cannot believe I am actually considering giving up and going to him. If I do that, I’ll lose all my pride. I can’t.

But I need him.

.

The thing about sleeping pills is that they simply force your body to shut down.

They don’t prevent nightmares.

Or let you wake up from them.

Officer Hwang is in her office, poring over a thick sheaf of papers, when I walk in.

“I figured you’d be coming sooner or later,” she utters.

My eyebrows quirk up in surprise. “Why?”

She looks up at me. “To explain why exactly you attached a keylogging software to that email you sent me?”

“Wait- you knew?”

“My computer’s ancient- this processor is nearly ten years old. A few days after I opened your email, my computer pretty much overheated and burnt out.” Officer Hwang crosses her arms. “When the IT guys came in to check out what happened, they suggested that there might’ve been a virus on my computer. Which led me to think back to your email- you’ve never emailed me before, and this timing was a little too suspicious.”

I grimace. “Look, I can explain. In fact, that’s pretty much why I’m here. There’s a lot I need to tell you about.”

“I see.” Officer Hwang crosses her arms. “Does this have anything to do with the notice all CRP caseworkers were sent?”

“What notice?”

“We were all called in to a meeting and alerted of an ‘unstable individual’ who had been a part of the CRP that was now ‘attempting to recruit former gang members to return to the criminal world once again’.”

. They already know?!

Officer Hwang takes my dumbfounded expression as confirmation.

“Hyo, what the hell are you doing?” she asks angrily. “We both worked so hard to get you a good life. And you’re just going to throw it all away?”

“Officer-,”

“I thought you were better! Everything was fine up until now. What are you doing?”

“It’s not-,”

“I don’t want to have to report you, Hyo, but-,”

“Listen!” I shout, shooting up. Officer Hwang’s eyes widen in surprise at my outburst.

“Look, everything’s been a lie!” I say. “I trust you because you actually care about this place, and getting rid of crime, and getting justice. So let me tell you what’s happening.”

And for the second time in 24 hours, I explain everything that has occurred. Officer Hwang’s face pales to a milky white color as I speak. She looks utterly stunned and wholly confused.

“You’re kidding me,” she breathes as I finish. “So this- the entire reason that this program was made was to open up space for new gangs?”

“Yeah. Look, don’t get me wrong.” I purse my lips. “The CRP has done a lot of good. Relocating all those gang members and giving them new lives was a blessing. The thing is, it was done for the wrong reasons. I don’t have a choice now. Joonmyeon- or Suho-,”

“Suho?” Officer Hwang’s jaw drops. “Wait, Joonmyeon is Suho?!”

I blink up at her. She has a shocked look on her face. “Yeah. Why, have you heard of him?”

She snorts. “Have I ever. Suho has been on our most wanted list for years.”

Her words send a tremor through me. “What? Is he that bad?”

“He’s probably the biggest gang lord in Seoul. If Suho goes down, half the gangs in this city fall with him.” Officer Hwang slowly shakes her head. “I can’t believe he was Kim Joonmyeon all along. The heir to one of our country’s largest companies. God.”

“Can you bring him in?” I ask eagerly. “Now that you know his real identity, couldn’t you-,”

“I have no evidence but your words,” Officer Hwang says reproachfully. “And besides, if he really has all these connections reaching into the government and police, he’ll be able to avoid arrest. We need something solid. And then we need to raise a public outcry about it.”

I lean across her. “That’s exactly why I came to you. I’m working with another officer from Daegu who was a part of the CRP, along with a few former gang members, to take them down. I’m not asking you to do anything, but when we do get evidence, please help us properly charge them. Since Jo- Suho does have all these police connections, they might try and sweep their crimes under the carpet. But we can’t let that happen.”

“Of course not.” Officer Hwang presses her lips together. “You got it, Hyo.”

“Thanks. I appreciate it, Officer.”

I rise, turn to the door, when her voice tentatively speaks again.

“Hyo... are you doing okay?”

My body stills.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” I ask nonchalantly.

Officer Hwang is eyeing me worriedly. “Are you kidding? Discovering that your best friend has been plotting against you the whole time-,”

“I have to go,” I abruptly say. “I’ll see you later.”

She rolls her eyes. “Alright, alright! I won’t talk about it. Just do me a favor, Hyo.”

“Yeah?”

“Have a good Christmas. Okay?”

My eyes widen. “Wait, what? What day is it today?”

“It’s Christmas Eve, silly. Why do you think I’m the only one in the station? Everyone else went home to be with their families or whatever.”

“Wha- why don’t you do that?”

“Please.” Officer Hwang throws me a knowing look. “The work never stops- even for Christmas. You should know that well.”

I give her a rueful smile. “True. Well, have a good Christmas. I’ll buy you food some day.”

“You’ve been saying that for the past 3 years!” she shouts after me.

A/N: ugh guys sry for no updates for the past two days.... un4tunately i have hit writers block or smthn i dont even know. plus im like vvv tired since ive been hella working out every day ( BODYPUMP MY WEAK STRUGGLED 2 LIFT 10 POUNDS WORTH OF WEIGHT FMLDFDF) BUT i feel super good!!! the only problemo is that somehow.... i have forgotten how to go to sleep. like i think im 2 stressed to sleep i dont even kno

ANYWAY GUYS radish fiction is out for android!!! so ya check my new story “flor.” @ PrincessVivi. i think someone said their mom’s named flor which is hella fresh.

ALSO! if you know any songs that go with this story/you listen to while reading this story, pls comment! the bootiful V0UZMEVOYEZ had a great idea of making a erpunch playlist hehe