"Walking 'round with my head down,

But I can't hide with these high heels on.

Downtown in a thick crowd,

But it's just you that my mind is on."

November in the streets of London were colder than I expected them to be. I like cold anyways, since I live in a place where this season is exactly or worse than this one. Why am I here and so far away from home, you might ask? I'm taking a nice vacation with my best friend Jina before the big day. It has always been my dream to come to this side of the world. A dream of mine that I shared long ago with someone very dear to me...he has been here before me, one too many times before. So many dreams we shared thinking we would be able to make them come true together...but all of that was gone once I made my choice of leaving him for his well-being. Everyday I see that he is doing okay. I check his Instagram whenever I can but I don't dare myself to follow him...I can't make him lose his focus in his career. He has worked so much to get to where he is right now. It was good enough and daring enough to go that one time at the signing event in Gangnam, when I told myself I shouldn't see him, there I was. I just couldn't restrain myself from watching him at least for the last time before I decided to finally move on and let go of him. Let go of the life I once had with him. Let go of the love I can never have again. 

One really funny fact he still doesn't know is that his dog Bugsy...he is the son of my parents' Frenchies and I got his little sister to take the last remaining pup for her. Little did I know, she was actually going to give the puppy to him. It was very surprising to me once I saw pictures of the dog on his Twitter. Good ol' Jiwon, always giving me surprises. We still keep in touch, call each other every now and then, but I make her swear everytime we talk not to tell her brother. Now that I've moved on, I had found someone special to me. He treats me kindly and I am very happy with him...and in three months we are to be married. But before I did this, my best friend begged me to come with her to London. Take it as an early wedding present she said. Since I knew the main reason why she was doing this exactly, I obliged. "Look! Look! Isn't it beautiful?!" she pointed at the Big Ben that we were able to see from afar. She had a weird thing for ancient clocks. "Yes, is pretty...now can we go somewhere and have dinner? We've been walking for hours and I'm starving to death here!" I told her. "Oh, alright! Alright! What do you want to eat? Where do you want to go?" Jina stopped walking and turned to face me, rolling her eyes and smiling.

"Hmm..." I gave her my thinking face. "Tonight, I feel in the mood for some steak!" I finally decided. "Then steak it is!"

"Really?! Are we really having steak?! Yay! Steak! Steak! Wouh!" I cheered, making lots of noise which made all of those who walked by, stare at me. "Stop, stop it you! You're embarassing me..." my best friend came to calm me down. "So I make you feel embarass? You don't wuf me anymore?!" I pouted cutely at  her, making Jina burst into a loud laugh. "You are so expressive, seriously! It's no wonder you and Si--" she cut herself off before she could finish saying the name. My pouty face slowly turned to a serious one, I always tried to hide my sadness whenever she would mention him by mistake. "It's alright, woman!" I slowly smiled at her. "Ah! I ruined it! Didn't I?! I promised you that I wasn't going to say his name on this trip. But here I am breaking that promise. God, I'm so dumb!" she slapped her forehead. "Don't be too hard on yourself. I already said it was okay. It's no big deal..." I reassured her. "You sure?" she wrapped an arm around my shoulder. "Yeah, I'm good!" she and I have being best friends since...uff, pre-school? So, of course she got to meet Siwon when he was still not part of Super Junior or famous.

She was there, the time he and I met at the auditions. She was there, to cheer for me. Jina went with me to keep me company since none of my parents could since they were working. She also knows the whole story...but of course, why wouldn't she if she is my bestest friend?! "Let's go then! Let's get you some steak!" she grinned at me and intertwined her hand with mine as she pulled me, making me walk with her . "Okie dokie!" I followed her to whatever the restaurant she was taking me was 'cause she was my personal tour guide. My best friend had been living in London for the past three years, so of course she knew of places we could go eat. Ten minutes later, it looked like we were walking around in circles. "Do you really know where is that restaurant you've been talking about for the past eight minutes is?" I glared at her suspiciously. "Of course I know! I know it's over here somewhere..." she replied nervously as she knew what  was coming  for her if she didn't find that restaurant quick. You don't want to mess with me when I'm really hungry and I was about 98% there. "I know is around here! Maybe a few blocks away..."

"A few blocks away?! Do you really want me to k--"

"Ah, there! Is there!" I turned to look at the place she was pointing at. It was at the other side of the sidewalk, so we needed to cross the street. "You are lucky we found it, or else you know what would have happened to you, do you?"

"Yes, mam!"

"Let's go then!" we took each other's hands and crossed the street cautiously like two high school girls. When we crossed to the other sidewalk, I heard her phone making a sound. "Oh, wait! Let me look at this!" she dropped the hand th