Hee Chul's POV

He kissed me... I can't believe he did that! But... What does that mean? He called me a --no... HIS . Does that mean he's just using me? Is Kang In right?

"You're so quiet, Chullie..." Han Geng said softly as he hugged me from behind.

We were in his house right now. Usually when I come over I rant on about my grades or beating out Cho or something menial, but today I was silent, contemplating what he'd said to me earlier. I shook my head. "I'm fine," I muttered.

Han Geng suddenly pulled me up to stand as he sat in my chair and then set me on his lap. His strong arms trapped me from escape. "Tell me what's wrong, Hee Chul," he said. "I know you're worried."

"A-Anii..." I said softly.

"Hee Chul... Just because I called you a doesn't mean anything. You're not! I will assure you of that. I was teasing you earlier."

My eyes widened and I turned to face him. "Wha-- How did you know I was... Thinking of that?"

Han Geng grinned softly, swiping some of my hair behind my ear. "Because I know you very well... I know a lot about you now... Things that no one else knows. I like you the way you are. You don't need to cover it up when you're with me. You don't need to hide anything. I will help and protect you always, just tell me."

My heart pounded with... Well... I'm not sure. I guess it was relief and hope. I finally had someone I could trust! Han Geng made my days worth it. Even if he was my only friend, that was more than I could ask for. Han Geng was an angel.

"Hee Chul, let's eat now, neh?" Han Geng suggested, grinning, prying me off of his lap to go get the food.

I smiled back and suddenly... A surprising question popped into my mind... Was I falling in love with Han Geng?

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I laid in my bed, worried. WAS I falling in love with Geng? Aish~~ I pulled at my hair as HeeBum jumped onto my bed.

"I'm not crazy... Right?" I asked him as I picked him up into my lap.

HeeBum just gazed at me with those giant blue-green eyes. They were so soft, so loving. I think HeeBum was telling me to follow my heart. He was always an understanding cat.

I sighed. Just less than a year ago, I had no Han Geng to vent to. If I was pissed, I'd go scream at whoever was around. If I was sad... I also yelled at people. I hated doing schoolwork because no one motivated me. I did enough to pass the class, but that was it. I rebelled against school rules by dyeing my hair. Maybe the only thing I didn't do was disrespect the teachers. It was never something I could avoid. I was naturally polite to them and disrespecting them was against my morales.

But then Han Geng came... Slowly, he opened me. I don't how, but he did. I started studying again. I was laughing, smiling. I began to follow school rules. I didn't snap at people as much. But all of that had caused the students to hate me... To hate Han Geng. They liked me as the school bad boy for some reason. Maybe because every school needed rebels and I was suited as one for the beginning. But it wasn't me. With Han Geng, I am me.

Around Han Geng I'm weak, yet strong. I'm fragile yet firm. I'm broken yet whole. I always felt like a girl in his arms, so strong yet comforting, gentle. Han Geng gives me purpose. I've always been independent, maybe a little too independent, never asking for help. But Han Geng didn't even need to be told if something was wrong. It's like he could read my mind. But I know he can't. He may be able to figure out what I want, but not what I'm exactly thinking. Han Geng was sharp and alert, but only with me...

Which also led me to wonder... What was I to Han Geng?

Was I a toy? A pet? A helpless person? A sad case? Or simply a friend? Or maybe more? A brother? A nuisance? What was I to him? Why did he care so much for me? Did he find me worthless or worthy? Am I fit enough to even receive his graciousness? He's an angel, perfect! Me? I'm an empty shell. I'm nothing. I'm so made up... There's nothing substantial about me! I told everyone that my parents were high class and rich. They were poor and hated me. To them, I was a waste of space and money. I told everyone I'd been popular in elementary. Yes... I was... I was very popular with small lockers and giant fists. I said I'd had my first time already. I was . Three times I was . Twice in middle school and once more at the beginning of high school. My innocence was taken from me, ripped away roughly, completely destroyed.

It was all lies. Everything I told them. All lies, with more lies piled on top. Who was I to have Han Geng when he should be friends with someone who can bring him up instead of down? My reputation was crushed, demented. It'd have to be remade, but until then, I was at the very bottom, worst than dirt. And Han Geng was there with me. He was going to get bullied and beat like I did and will be again. The world is a cruel place, and bottom is even worst... I just dragged Han Geng to hell... And I will not forgive myself for that...