Online Dating #5 - Yoongi
Group: BTS
Pairing: YoonSeok
Chapter Rating: G
Word Count: 2,574

“Jimin, there’s something I need to tell you.” Yoongi says, poking his head into the illustrator’s office early Monday morning. He had been thinking about this all weekend, and he just can’t hold it in. It hurts him to know that Seokjin, the one person to have ever treated Jimin like a prince in their relationship, is actually not as perfect as he seems on the surface. It hurts him even more to keep it from Jimin, knowing that the kid has to find out sooner or later. “Come to my office when you’re free?”

He walks away once Jimin sends him a nod of confirmation, and he heads to his own office. He fixes himself a cup of coffee and sits at his desk where a new manuscript lies. Yoongi sighs. He has still has two other manuscripts to finish editing before the end of the week, and he’s assigned another one without notice. Just as he starts to put that aside, his door comes open and Jimin plops down in the chair in front of his desk. “What’s up?” He asks simply, leaning back in his chair.

Yoongi swallows. Jimin obviously isn’t even expecting any bad news, so Yoongi almost backs out and doesn’t tell him. The only thing is, if he doesn’t tell Jimin, he has no reason for having called the kid to his office. “Do you know where Seokjin was Friday night?” Yoongi asks slowly. He just needs to know how much Jimin knows.

“Yeah,” Jimin says. “He got called to the hospital for an emergency, so he wasn’t home until late.” The answer comes easily, but he falters on the last few words, as if he’s wondering why Yoongi would ask such a thing. “Why?”

“Wow,” Yoongi leans back in his chair. “His job sure gives him a perfect excuse to leave the house, doesn’t it?”

“Y-Yoongi, is there something you’re not telling me?” Jimin’s voice is hesitant now, and Yoongi’s heart hurts so much.

Yoongi sighs, turning back and forth in his chair. He has to bring himself to say this. Jimin is his best friend. He has to be honest with him. “I think Seokjin lied to you about having an emergency call in to work,” He explains. “I was on a date with Hoseok, and I saw him out with Hyosang. Jimin, he wasn’t at the hospital.”

Jimin shakes his head, and Yoongi almost cries because he can see a thin layer of tears forming in Jimin’s eyes. “He sometimes goes out with Hyosang after his work,” Jimin tells Yoongi. “I’m not worried about it. They’re just really good friends.”

Jimin doesn’t believe that. He doesn’t even sound like he believes that. He sounds like he’s trying to convince him self that his boyfriend is as loyal as he is. “Jimin, I know what I saw, and Seokjin even confirmed it himself when I confronted him about it.” Yoongi tries to be more direct about this. He can’t let his best friend live a lie. He can’t let Jimin convince himself that everything is perfect. Yoongi knows what that’s like. To be cheated on by someone he trusts. It’s happened to him before. “I’m really sorry, Jims. I just…I thought I should tell you. As your best friend.”

Jimin is now avoiding eye contact, and his nostrils flair a little as he tries to hold back his tears. He nods his head and slowly rises from the chair. “Thank you,” Jimin says before turning to leave the office. “I’ll…uh…talk to him about it later. And…” Yoongi can’t see Jimin’s face now that he’s facing away from him, but he can tell that the kid is crying now. Yoongi feels awful. He feels guilty. Like he’s the one who hurt his friend somehow. “Well…just…thank you.” Yoongi hears him sniffle. “You really are a good friend.”

Hoseok pays for the two coffees, and he and Yoongi find a spot to sit at in the somewhat crowded cafe. Hoseok hands Yoongi his cafe drink, and takes a sip from his own. “I know you want to protect him,” Hoseok says. “But I really think you did the right thing by telling him.”

Yoongi mixes his drink with the thin straw. He can’t stop thinking about Jimin and how much pain the kids must be in, but somehow Hoseok has a way of making him feel better about the situation. Like he did do the right thing by telling Jimin what he knows. It makes him feel less guilty about telling his friend. “Thanks,” He says, and he takes a sip of his iced coffee. “Anyway, I’m thinking about going back to school and choosing a different career path.” Yoongi changes subjects. The talk of Jimin and his crumbling relationship is not helping his already depressed mood. “I thought I’d like to be an editor because it sounded easy, but it’s actually boring and stressful.” Now that he and Hoseok have been seeing each other for a while, he’s beginning to open up to the other more. He’s beginning to talk more about his life and dreams and such.

Seriously, if Hoseok doesn’t stop smiling like an idiot all the time, it’s probably going to be the death of Yoongi. As the days go by, Yoongi can’t help but feel like that smile is meant only for him, but he convinces himself that it’s just his hopes speaking. “You don’t have to go back to school to find a new job,” Hoseok assures him. “You can just quit everything and play games with me. You’re really cute, and my fans would love you. In fact, they’d probably ship us together.”

I know I do, Yoongi thinks to himself. “I’ll think about it,” Yoongi says. Playing games for a living does sound fun, but it’d mean leaving Jimin alone at the publishing company. The kid would forever hate him if he were to do anything like that.

Yoongi returns to his apartment with a crying Jimin on the couch, and Taehyung sitting next to him, trying to comfort him. “You’re going to need a bigger place,” Taehyung says, and he gets up from the couch to let Yoongi take a seat next to his best friend.

He’s a mess. His eyes are incredibly red and puffy, and his nose is read as well. He has tears trailing down his already tear-stained cheeks, and his breathing is completely uneven as he continues crying. “What is wrong with me?” Jimin cries, leaning on Yoongi for comfort. “Why can’t I have something perfect for once?”

“Jims, you’re still young,” Yoongi assures him, rubbing his shoulder. “You have plenty of time to find perfection.” Yoongi used to believe that it wasn’t possible, either, but that was only weeks ago. He’s almost certain he’s found that now with Hoseok, and he’s not going to give up until Hoseok is his. Again, he feels guilty for having these thoughts while his best friend is sitting on the couch next to him.

“I know it’s already crowded because Taehyung is staying here…” Jimin begins, and he doesn’t even have to finish that sentence. Yoongi already knows what he wants.

“Taehyung took over the living room,” Yoongi informs him. “So you can put a matt down on my bedroom floor if you want. At least until you figure out what else you can do.”

That Saturday, Yoongi has plans with Hoseok to meet at a cafe, and Taehyung decides to come along this time, really wanting to meet Hoseok for himself. Besides, Hoseok is also bringing a friend that Yoongi hadn’t met yet, so it’s only fair. This friend of Hoseok’s is really tall. A little taller than Seokjin, and he’s really handsome too. Taehyung makes a comment about that before they order their coffees. Hoseok introduces his friend as Namjoon, the one who does the editing of all of his let’s play videos. Yoongi introduces Taehyung as the person who goes to school for film study and surfs around on Yoongi’s couch.

“So my roommate is moving out in two weeks to move into his new place with his girlfriend,” Namjoon starts just after they choose a booth at which to sit. “So now I’m going to need a new roommate, or I’ll have to move out as well.”

Yoongi catches the glisten in his roommate’s eyes. Taehyung lights up at the opportunity. “Right now, there are three people living in Yoongi’s one bedroom apartment,” Taehyung informs the other. “So, I mean, if you’re looking for a roommate, I’m sure either Jimin or I could take up that spot.”

It would be great to get the two of them out of his apartment so that he could have his place to himself again. It’s so crowded with three people living in an apartment meant for one, small, person with minimal belongings such as himself. “I think it’d be really good for you,” Yoongi says, nudging his roommate in the rib. “I mean, Namjoon studied at film school, too, right? So maybe he can help you with your projects.”

The smile that Namjoon flashes Taehyung makes Yoongi’s heart flutter in his chest, hoping that maybe something great can come of it for them. Maybe Yoongi meeting Hoseok isn’t only good for him, but for his friends as well. Taehyung can finally move out and get his own room, and maybe…in time, Yoongi can introduce Jimin to Jungkook, and something great could come of that, too.

Namjoon and Taehyung fall into conversation after that. It’s a conversation that has a lot of lighting and filming vocabulary that Yoongi doesn’t really understand a lot, so his attention is brought to Hoseok. “I think these two are doing fine on their own,” Hoseok says. “Do you want to go somewhere else?”

Yoongi has to be falling for Hoseok deeply because of how y he finds it to be that Hoseok suggests it. “And just leave them here?” He questions. Just leaving his friends in the middle of a group outing is something that Yoongi’s never done before, but he’s really excited about it.

Hoseok turns to Namjoon and Taehyung. “Hey, Yoongi and I are going for a walk. You two can stay here, if you want.”

“All right. Have fun, man.” Namjoon says, hardly skipping a beat of his own conversation with Taehyung.

Hoseok gets up from the booth, pulling Yoongi along with him as they leave from the cafe. It’s still cold out, only going further into the winter season. It’s even colder than the night that Hoseok and Yoongi had met, so Yoongi’s not complaining when Hoseok pulls him closer and allows Yoongi to squeeze tightly onto his arm for warmth. The hot cafe drink in his hand hardly providing enough warmth to keep his fingers from freezing without gloves—because Yoongi’s an idiot and often forgets these things. “What do you have in mind, if not sitting inside the warm cafe like perfectly sane people?” Yoongi asks with interest.

“Oh, Yoongi, I think we’ve known each other long enough for you to know that I’m anything but sane,” Hoseok teases, poking Yoongi in the side.

Yoongi flinches and winces when his hot coffee spills out onto his fingers. “, I’m sorry,” Hoseok apologizes. He quickly grabs Yoongi’s hand and the coffee spills up. He places soft lips to the burning skin, and Yoongi’s pretty sure his face is almost as hot as his fingers are. He’s also pretty certain that it shows. “I should really be more careful. I’m sorry,” Hoseok says, kissing Yoongi’s hand once more.

“I-it’s fine, Hoseok,” Yoongi insists. He pulls his hand free from Hoseok’s grasp before the other has the chance to kiss him again.

Honestly, Yoongi’s starting to get a little annoyed with how sweet Hoseok is. He likes it. He loves that Hoseok is sweet to him. He’s not used to getting treated like this, but he wishes that Hoseok wouldn’t lead him on. Hoseok’s already made it fairly clear that he’s not interested in a relationship, but he keeps doing things that make Yoongi wonder how he really feels. It’s so frustrating. Yoongi wishes he’d just be clear about what he wants.

“You’re really cute when you get shy,” Hoseok says.

“Hoseok, what do you want?” Yoongi demands, suddenly. He just really needs to know what kind of potential this has. He needs to know what this, what they have, can become. “Because I really like you, but I feel like you’re just leading me on. You say you don’t want a relationship, but you keep being really sweet—”

Yoongi is silenced by Hoseok’s lips, and all thoughts of the cold seem to vanish as Yoongi feels his entire body heating up. The kiss seems to last for hours. Warm lips pressed together, moving in perfect synchronization, but Yoongi’s the first one to pull away as fear builds up in him. “I can’t,” Yoongi says, and he backs up from Hoseok. “I’m sorry…I can’t.”

He doesn’t give Hoseok anything more than that before he turns around and runs home, or, to the nearest sub station leading to his apartment at least. He feels like a jerk for just leaving like that, but it’s too late to turn around when he finally comes to his senses. Hoseok probably wouldn’t even be there by the time Yoongi made it back to that spot, so Yoongi just continues his way home.

“Yoongi?” Jimin’s soft voice rings in the bedroom as a depression sinks into the mattress where Jimin is probably taking a seat. Yoongi sniffles, not feeling the slightest bit better about his stupid mistake of running away earlier. Everything was going so perfect. So well. And he had to go and ruin it by just running away. “Yoongi, Hoseok wants to talk to you.”

“Tell him I’m not here,” Yoongi whines, not really ready to talk to Hoseok about this yet.

“Yoongi, I can see you,” He hears Hoseok’s voice from the door, and Yoongi buries his face in the pillow further.

“If I can’t see you, you can’t see me.” Yoongi says. “I’m not here.”

Jimin’s small hand rubs soothingly over Yoongi’s back. “I’ll let you two talk about this.” Jimin says, and Yoongi can feel him get up from the bed.

The room falls quiet until Yoongi can hear Hoseok shuffling around to make it to the bed. He feels a depression, much heavier than the one from Jimin, and somehow more comforting. “I never said I don’t want a relationship.” Hoseok says. “You sure are good at assuming things, you know.”

“I just don’t want to fall in love alone,” Yoongi whispers, not looking at Hoseok. He doesn’t want Hoseok to see him in the weak state he’s in right now.

“You didn’t,” Hoseok says. He rubs Yoongi’s back assuringly, and Yoongi sighs. He’s so much better at this than Jimin. Jimin is too soft. Hoseok’s hands are strong, but in a comforting and safe feeling way. “I said that I want to let it just happen, Yoongi. And sometime between you falling to the ground with ice cream in your hair and now, it did. It just happened.”

“I still don’t think I can do this.” Yoongi says. “I really like you, and I’d like for this to last forever, Hoseok. But nothing does. Nothing lasts forever.”

E/N: This isn't the conclusion. The next chapter is Hoseok's POV, and that will tell what happens after Yoongi's last statement here. I have to leave it at that because you have something to look forward to in the final chapter. :3