Okay, so as I have said, like a broken record, I have a personality disorder. I am bipolar, and being bipolar I tend to have a really distorted view of social interactions and people in general. I just don't get it. I am actually pretty pissed at someone here. Not mentioning names, because I am not trying to ostracize you or . I am just trying to understand how talking to you genuinely about my mental health and suicidal tendencies would end up blowing up on my face when I genuinely, genuinely just wanted you to stop sending me random ing love notes because you are a ing stranger who only tells me this weird like you love me, and to keep going, and all this help you nonsense, people tell you on some suicide hotline.

As someone suffering from my mental illness, I immediately know this has something to do with you and your experience with a person in your life suffering from depression, and I didn't even ask, because frankly, I don't really give a , because I don't know you. You are just a bunch of ing letters who keep pushing your "good intentions" on me like you are some ing Jehovah's witness offering salvation. Now, I didn't even get mad at your salvation drive and if you think your some sort of hero saving lives with your random, insincere , I say do it if it helps you. If you save someone's life then good for you.

I'll leave you alone because you are obviously not looking at friendship, but some gratification from doing "good" and I am fine with that. But randomly again, you sent me a thank you and I am just baffled as to how much you will send me with your random acts of kindness that are frankly intrusive and insincere. You don't even know. You don't even try to get to know me. Your just spewing love and thanks and peace and just trying to feel good about yourself because you are so nice and kind. So I just wanted you to stop sending me these crap. I looked through your blog to know your situation, and that might have been stepping over boundaries, but jeez, kid, if you didn't want to publicize your cousin committing suicide, then I don't know, maybe don't make it public.

So I tell you, you can't help people with random kindness because it comes of as insincere and I tell you you should befriend people if you really wanted to help. I mention that you might be having a hard time with someone in your life who has committed suicide, but I just don't need or want your random love notes as you call them. That was it.

And then you tell me to back off, and that I'm offensive, and you don't care about me trying to kill myself. Holy , kid. I am not trying to make you care about me! I just really wanted you to shut up with your bull. OF COURSE YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT ME YOU'RE A ING STRANGER. OH GOD. WHY DO I HAVE TO DEAL WITH THESE PEOPLE JUST ING WHY.

Maybe I shouldn't have mentioned it, suicide and , because you obviously find it touchy and offensive, but you know what I don't care about you either. Why do you expect me to care about your feelings when you just barge in with your kindness crusade and not care about mine?

Oh this .

I am just not going to talk to random people anymore. Good ing grief.