Young Bae was waiting patiently, watching Ji Yong while he tried to come to a conclusion. He was still holding the closed bottle of shampoo, his other arm drawn up, held protectively close to his body. He really was going to need help. Averting his eyes, Ji Yong ed his shirt and slipped it off. He hesitated again, with his hands on the waist of his pants.

“It’s not weird?” he questioned with a hopeful voice.

“It was weirder when you suddenly stopped and I had to ask Dae Sungie to scrub my back.” He paused. “And he does it too roughly.”

“Sorry. I just thought…”

“Well, knock it off and come help me before the hot water runs out.”

Drawing up his courage, Ji Yong slid his pants off and approached Young Bae. He tried not to notice the beautiful caramel skin, the muscles, or…anything else. He told himself that this wasn’t the y man that he was in love with; this was just a friend who needed and extra hand. No big deal.

That was, until Young Bae tipped his head back as Ji Yong massaged the shampoo into his hair. He swallowed hard and tried not to let his eyes follow the uninterrupted view down the front of his friend’s body. It was an already difficult task, made impossible when Young Bae half turned so Ji Yong could rinse his hands. Without any consultation, his eyes zipped straight down his body, focusing first on his abs, then on his soft member. Realizing what he was doing, he tore his eyes away and watched the soap run off of his hands.

Finished, he grabbed the conditioner and stepped back so Young Bae could rinse his hair. He should have closed his eyes; instead they zoomed over, watching the suds slide down his toned body. Almost painfully, Ji Yong screwed up his face and forced his eyes to the ceiling. But the image was already replaying in his mind.

“Ji Yong-ah?”

“What?” His eyes snapped back to the shorter man, who was looking at him curiously.

“Conditioner?” he said, pointing at the bottle clenched in Ji Yong’s hand.

“Oh, right. Yes. T-turn around,” he instructed, voice shaking.

“If it’s too hard, I understand. I’m not trying to make things worse for you.”

“For me?” Ji Yong sighed. “I’m just worried that I’ll make things uncomfortable for you. And then-”

“Kwon Ji Yong,” Young Bae cut him off, seriously. “How long ago did you tell me how you felt?”

“When we were 22.”

“Have I said or done anything since that moment to make you believe that I’m freaked out by it?”

“No, but-”

“Have I treated you differently?”

“No. But-”

“Are you seriously under the assumption that the eight or nine years prior to that, I had no idea you were gay?”

“…What?”

“Do you think I never noticed, in all that time, where your eyes had a habit of looking at? That I was oblivious to the fact that it was always me you were watching? Although, I’m sure if Hyung showered with us, you would’ve had plenty to distract you.”

“What are you… I don’t… Even Hyung wouldn’t have distracted me long,” Ji Yong admitted. “You knew? All that time, you knew?”

“Of course I did. And I’m being completely honest with you when I say that it doesn’t bother me. It didn’t then and it doesn’t now. Are you going to suddenly assault me? me and pin me to a wall?”

Ji Yong snorted.

“Exactly. So why would your eyes bother me? How you feel, is how you feel. And how I feel, is that you mean the most to me out of everybody that I know. I know you, I trust you, and I’m more comfortable around you than anyone else in this world. Even my mom. So please, stop worrying about silly things.” He gripped Ji Yong’s shoulder loosely. “Now seriously, put the freaking conditioner in my hair so I can get to bed soon.”

Ji Yong laughed, wiping at the tears that were sitting in his eyes. “I got it,” he consented.

“Thank you.”

They were quiet while Ji Yong rubbed in the conditioner and squeezed soap onto the pad Young Bae held out to him. He started washing his body, but didn’t get far before he had to stop.

“My arm.” He looked down where his arm crossed his chest. “How do I…”

“I’ll hold it, you wash,” Ji Yong offered.

“Okay, be careful.” Almost as soon as Ji Yong touched it, he gasped. “Not there. Hold it under here. Ouch! Not there, not there.”

“Sorry, sorry.”

Ji Yong removed his hands entirely; it was upsetting to see Young Bae call out in pain. It had to be awful to make him vocalize it like that.

“Here. Take the sponge. I’ll hold it, you wash. Quickly though, okay?”

“I-but…”

“Please Ji Yongie, I can’t do it by myself.”

“Okay. I can do it.”

Gritting his teeth, Young Bae gently pulled his arm away from his body just enough to allow Ji Yong access. Rushing, he washed his chest, side, stomach, and then the arm itself.

“Done. I’m done.”

Young Bae tenderly moved his arm back to his body. Face tight, he leaned against Ji Yong’s shoulder for a minute. Ji Yong laid a hand on the back of his head.

“Didn’t they give you something for pain?” he asked softly, putting his other hand in the middle of Young Bae’s upper back.

“It’s wearing off. I’m supposed to take more in the morning.” Taking a deep breath he lifted his head. “Let’s finish.”

Silently, Ji Yong washed Young Bae’s good arm, then moved on to his back. After briefly pausing, he knelt down, cleaning his legs and bottom. He swallowed roughly as he scooted around to get the front of his legs. A hand touched his shoulder and he thought his friend meant to stop him, but instead their eyes met and he simply lifted a foot, using his shoulder for balance.

With only his groin left, Ji Yong once again looked up. Young Bae had his eyes closed and his face scrunched in pain, he was hugging his sore arm. Forcing himself not to react, he began to wash his friend. He used his free hand to maneuver everything, while scrubbing gently with the sponge.

“Let’s get you rinsed off,” he said gently, standing up.

“I thought there wasn’t going to be groping,” he tried to joke, his voice thick with pain.

“Hush.”

Ji Yong stepped close and moved him into the stream of water. Their faces inches apart, he started running his hands through Young Bae’s hair, rinsing the conditioner away. His tapped Young Bae’s belly, but he pretended not to notice, his hands gliding down his friend’s back, then turning him to reach the front. Gently, they worked together again to remove the soap with no more pain than absolutely necessary. Wiping his legs quickly, Ji Yong reached for the knob.

“Wait. It got on you, too.” Young Bae touched Ji Yong’s chest lightly, coming back with bubbles.

He looked down at himself and stepped into the water, washing the soap away from his front.

He helped him dry off and held open a pair of boxer briefs for him to step into.

“Do you want shorts?”

“No. This is good enough.”

“Sling?”

“Not to sleep in.”

He leaned against the wall, waiting while Ji Yong got dressed, eyelids half-closed.

“Let’s go to bed.”

“Doors-”

“And lights, I know. I already double checked before I came in here.”

Once in bed, he helped the tired man prop up his arm with pillows, then snuggled up to his other side. Every so often, Young Bae would let out a grunt of pain.

“Not sleeping?”

“Hurts.”

Frowning, Ji Yong readjusted so that he could run his fingers through Young Bae’s damp hair and started humming a melody that had been floating around his head for two to three days.

“Are you composing right now?”

Ji Yong smiled. “You want something more established? Fine, fine.” He sang That XX, even after his friend snorted.

“Sweet lullaby,” he murmured, turning his face into Ji Yong’s neck.

He continued to sing softly while his hair back, until long after he had fallen asleep. Eyes too heavy to stay open any longer, he rested his hand on Young Bae’s chest and fell asleep quickly.