*Flashback, October 2014*
There’s nothing like the scent of Seungri’s warm body after a shower. He smells like strawberries, the girly shampoo we both use, and soap. His skin is softer than silk and I just love the way it feels when it brushes gently against mine. So I wrap my arms around Seungri’s waist and pull him closer, burying my face in the crook of his neck in order to breath in his sweet scent. He struggles a little before leaning against me. Young Bae just rolls his eyes at our intimacy and sticks a piece of spicy pork in his mouth. 

‘Aishhhh… you couldn’t wait?’ Dae walks into our favorite restaurant and tosses himself on the seat across me, leaving the oldest hyung behind. His messy hair is a little damp because of the rain and I can tell he fought with Seunghyun for space under the umbrella, like they always do.

‘My baby was hungry~’ I nuzzle Seungri’s cheek and he giggles, offering Daesung some of his rice

Seunghyun join us and he’s completely wet from head to toe. Dae smiles proudly as we all chuckle. Just looking at his soaking clothes mads me shiver and I press even closer against Seungri. The guys continue talking but I can’t hear a word from what they’re saying. I’m in a different world. Population: Me , Seungri’s warmness, softness and scent.
  
***
I was sitting in that very same spot but the seat next to me was empty. My fingers weren’t laced with Seungri’s small ones and I felt cold, out of my place. It felt like I never visited this restaurant with the other guys, as if it never was 'our’ place for meeting up. I was playing nervously with my hands while waiting. It’s obvious I wasn’t excited about meeting Youngbae, it was all because of Seungri. It’s always because of him… Something made me think that I may have a chance with him and the thought of him holding me again made my heart skip a beat. It felt as if I was waiting for my date to arrive back when I was 14.

'A penny for your thoughts,’ I looked up and I saw Bae smiling brightly in his brand new T-shirt, making me feel like a total idiot for not changing the suit I wore today at work

I was having a panic attack. “Why the f am I wearing a suit? I probably look like a complete idiot. Oh god no. He’ll think I look stupid. I do look stupid. Look at me in my fancy suit at a damn resto. God, kill me right now.”

'Jiyong?,’ 

'I need some whiskey,’ I was already nervously taking off my cardigan when Seungri entered the restaurant 

He headed towards “our table” by instinct and, fortunately, I noticed he was wearing the suit from earlier this morning. I got déjà vu, seeing him walk towards us for the 1000th time but it ended as soon as he sat opposite of me, on Daesung’s favorite seat.

'Did you order?,’ he forced a light smile on his face and, although it was fake, it melt my heart

'I just got here a few seconds before you,’ Bae chuckled, 'Did you order, Ji?’

And, oh my, he was pure perfection. From his jawline to the curve of his chapped lips, there wasn’t a thing I would change about Seungri. The way his bright blond hair fell over his eyes and his fingers brushed trough it left me breathless. 

'Ji?’

I shook my head awkwardly, light blush spreading all over my face. I’m such an idiot. They both saw me staring just like a teenage boy checks his hot teacher out.

'3 burgers with extra cheese and mustard?,’ Young Bae asked and we all chuckled

Seungri’s laughter surprised me but it was sweeter than honey.

'Two large cokes and a tonic with no ice.,’ the youngest one added, my heart skipping a beat as a response, 'How do you d-…’

He covered his mouth and looked down, causing all my happiness to disappear. Was it that bad? He didn’t want to talk to me? Was I