“rain”

A lot of things change once a girl experience a failed relationship. Bomi would like to elaborate, but she’s too busy practicing and getting her head in the practice for this year’s KTMF in Los Angeles.

One thing’s for sure though, she changed to a stronger, funnier, and dorkier Bomi. She had already moved on from her past bitter relationship months ago. She stopped holding on to something that will never have a chance of happening the way she needs it to.

Unfortunately for her members, she never got the chance to continue her story after that April night. She reasoned that she wasn’t ready or excused herself whenever they would start the conversation, telling them to just focus on their Japan promotions for Luv instead. They didn’t go further than that and did just what Bomi said. In truth, she just didn’t need sympathizing looks and worried faces from her members because that is what they’ll exactly do if they ever found out in the near future. Even when it’s in the past.

During break time, Bomi sat on the far side corner of the room with a water bottle in hand. Chorong wasn’t in sight, and she knew right then what she was doing. Eunji and Hayoung had been busy playing games on their phones. While Naeun –

A phone suddenly rang.

“Unnie, this is your phone, right?” Naeun asked, her eyes on the screen of the phone on the table. She grabbed it then looked at Bomi with confusion in her eyes.

“Unknown number?”

A flash of hesitation crossed Bomi’s face which Naeun saw before Bomi’s face lightened.

“End it.”

“Should I give you your phone? It might call again,” Naeun walked to where Bomi’s sitting.

She thought to herself, ‘Something’s odd.’ After the group found out Bomi’s past relationship, they made her promise to never keep something from them again. That goes with the other members, too. Seconds ago, Naeun had doubted her promise. Instinct noticed her unnie’s unusual reaction so she tucked a small reminder in her head to keep an eye on her.

Bomi shrugged, instead of answering, she lied down on the cold concrete floor. A peculiar habit she learned after the break up. It felt similar and at first her bare shoulders (she’s wearing a muscle tee) recoiled at the sudden cool sensation, which turned to familiarity. Before closing her eyes, Naeun looked over her, one eyebrow raised. The phone in Naeun’s right hand rang again.

“Unnie?”

She struggled at that moment in keeping her eyes closed. Her body relaxed once again when the ringtone stopped but that was short-lived too.

“Hello? Who is this?” Naeun’s voice was not that loud to make Eunji and Hayoung put away their attention from their fun though her sharp tone formed a mind filled with uneasiness.

Still, determined to keep her eyes shut, she pretended not to be affected at all.

“She’s not here,” Naeun spoke, her eyes observing Bomi’s face and her every move. She’s not that great of an actress, but she knew the basics. If she couldn’t even tell her member’s terrible façade, then it wouldn’t be right to call herself one.

“You didn’t answer, who are you?”

Bomi shot up from lying down, motionless. She looked at Naeun once, stood up, and then motioned her to give her the phone. Naeun didn’t complain though it was clear in her eyes that she didn’t want to. What could she do? It was Bomi’s phone. She couldn’t just take it away from the owner and say no.

“Hello?” Bomi spoke.

An agitated voice filled the line. “Finally, it’s you.”

She sighed which meant entirely different of what she’s going to tell Naeun.

“I’m sorry but I think you called the wrong number. Please delete this.”

Once she ended the phone call, she gave the person in front of her a fake smile.

“A fan,” she said, chuckling.

Guilty as she felt for lying, Bomi hadn’t gathered enough courage to tell her, or the others, the truth. She knew Naeun didn’t believe one word she had said - the smile plastered on her face proved so – but if she learned who the person on the other line was, she’ll definiely tell Chorong and Chorong will not approve of what she’s doing.

“Everyone, let’s continue!”

Chorong entered the room, bright and merry, that Namjoo couldn’t help pointing that out.

“Somebody just got off the love train.” She didn’t look at Chorong, she didn’t giggle, but Hayoung did.

“Hayoungie!” Chorong scolded, without being mean.

“Saranghae Sunday Monday~” Eunji started singing while continuously nodding her head and looking at Bomi, expecting her to follow along like she always do.

The member didn’t. She wasn’t even looking anywhere else except stealing short glances at Naeun.

Rain poured outside in the middle of the night, waking Bomi up from her tent bed. Very carefully, she climbed down the ladder of the bunk bed. She put her favorite jacket on and took Eunji’s umbrella before closing the door of their room. It was quiet and dark but the light from the moon helped her get to the front foor and took whatever shoes she immediately touched. Outside the building, the rain drizzled from gray clouds above.

She muttered, “Ah, I should’ve brought my earphones with me.”

“What a waste.”

She hopped down the small steps and ventured on the sidewalk. Walking while it rained reminded her of an adorable story Chorong once told her – she couldn’t remember when. A smile crept in her face and she didn’t even notice.

Thinking about rain reminded her of something – or someone – which instantly replaced her smile with a frown. Not because of annoyance or contempt, maybe a little.

SMA 2014.

Bomi’s phone vibrated in her hand. Apink was inside their van headed to the location of Seoul Music Awards.

It’s raining.

At the sight of the odd message, she instantly looked outside for any sign of rain. ‘He’s really whacked in the head,’ she thought.

No, it isn’t.

She replied back. She put her phone on her lap, not having the energy of looking at any messages again if it vibrates.

She fixed her attention outside. Inside, she hoped it’d rain. She wanted the sky to grow dark, and she wanted to forget everything. The sky was still blue, the pavements still dry, like the distress in her chest still remaining until the she stepped on the ground. She blamed the rain for not cooperating, for not accompanying her in torment, for not washing down the tight feeling in her chest.

She gripped her phone and when it vibrated, she had the feeling that if she opened the message she’d be herself again – even for a second.

Rain, go rain, it’s raining, it’s raining ~

She scoffed right then, a smile tugging on her lips.

“Who are you texting, Bbom?” Eunji curiously asked and peeped behind her.

She hurriedly covered the screen of her phone with her free hand.

“Uh, Eunkwang?” She said. “Yes! Eunkwang!”

“Huh?”

“He sent me a joke!” She forced a laugh. “He – he told me he’d text it to you too! So don’t look!”

Eunji raised both her arms as if surrendering. “Okay, okay. I didn’t even see anything.”

Bomi sighed.

During Apink’s performance, Exo didn’t give that much of a reaction. If the fans only knew how hard it was for the other members to restrain themselves from singing along and acting out a few moves, like Luhan for example. Chanyeol would sometimes glance at Chen to see his expression only to find him nonchalant. Chen noticed eyes were on him but his eyes didn’t bother looking around. Acting like he didn’t care was making him tired, and seeing Bomi on stage added a heavy feeling on his shoulders.

During EXO’s performace, specifically Growl, Apink couldn’t hold themselves to the beat of the music and so they danced on their seats. The leader was genuinely very giddy for personal reasons and the rest were being their usual selves – goofing around and all – except one person who was giving laughs to the members. She was laughing but she hadn’t been herself all night.

The awards had ended. Idols and artists alike retreated towards the exit. Some of the members almost couldn’t supress their giggles when they noticed Suho lurking behind their leader. Inside their van, the teasing began. Bomi’s attention was somewhere else – specifically her phone.

Who is this?

The message read. With one brow slightly raised, she swiftly typed on the screen without garnering the attention of the others.

Uh… did you lose a screw or something? I think you’re miss