Hyerin

Dr Nam retells me what he sees. I've had this feeling lingering in my mind so when he finally announces it I find it no surprise. I guess fate doesn't want us apart, despite my heart breaking decisions.

The first time I knew was 2 weeks ago. Dr. Nam told me that Jin had been hospitalised for drinking too much wine, resulting to him falling into a short coma. I felt my heart stop pumping, my mind clash within and my world falling into a black pit when I assumed he might never wake up again. Turns out it wasn't as bad as I thought and he woke up within two days. What a lucky man.

But those 16 hours I stayed with him pulled my strings. It made me rethink my decisions while I had held his hand, unable to see his face. I don't think I would have appreciated his pained face if I could see, though. I would have liked to be there when he woke up but Dr. Nam forced me back into my room so I could have some rest. He told me that if I were to stay awake any longer I might risk my life and end up never seeing Jin again, even if I have changed my mind over my decisions. So I did. I followed his instructions and fell back into a land of the unknown.

When I woke up, I knew my choice. I regretted my previous preposition between Jin and I so I want to change this. I wanted him to know that I still need him by my side, even if it was too late. But no matter how long I wait, he never visited me. This adds up to 4 weeks without Jin seeing me. Or at least without coming into my room.

Dr. Nam tells me that Jin sits outside my room every day since he had been here in the hospital, explaining it with a tint of annoyance in his throat. I could understand him though. I wouldn't want a gloom mushroom by my front door any day.

I listen attentively to every word he says as he describes Jin's state. 'He's so dam miserable and depressed that his aura is crawling onto my skin,' he would repeatedly complain and this makes me giggle because I am reminded of the time he failed a health test. He ended up retaking it and passing it with flying marks after a few chants of motivation from me.

The nurses also stopped visiting me to talk about Jin. I thought that maybe they slowly got over him but later I heard them talking outside my room about 'the handsome man coming back.'

Truthfully, Jungkook mentioned this to me before on the day Jin woke up from his very short coma. My attention wasn't exactly fully on him because my mind was preoccupied with relief that Jin was alive. What I do remember is him saying something along the lines of, 'I predict that man will mope around your room during his stay here.'  He's definitely going to be a good policeman with predictions like those. He and Taehyung would probably make the best team in town.

There was also this one time when this strangers entered my room. I could hear his odd walking pattern which alerted my attention. He had a deep, manly voice and smelt unfamiliar. It was the one and only time someone I didn't know had visited me and it scared me. I remember shaking in fear and asking who he was. He replied with a 'I'm Jin's friend. Your stalker's friend. Just came to tell you, in case you didn't know there was a coward outside your room.' I was utterly confused but when I did realise, I remind myself every day that if I were to see that stranger again, I would show my appreciation.

It wasn't just Jungkook  or that mysterious person that gave me an idea of what Jin was doing but it was also quite distinct. While I rest in the bed, I can hear his sobs and smell his familiar scent. I would listen to him mumble my name and that made my heart pinch. I wanted to cry too but sadly I couldn't.

I had the urge to call out his name but I never seem to. I guess I'm waiting until the moment he decides to stroll in confidently.

There was this one time when Dr. Nam made a decision that I was too cramped in the room and that I needed fresh air for once so he took me out to the cafeteria. A nurse then called him for an emergency and he left me alone. It was one of the scariest times of my life the moment he disappeared. I felt trapped and lonely, like no one else was there for me. There were screaming and squealing from all over the place, rebounding the walls and forcing itself into my ears. I was scared it was overwhelming. I felt like I needed Jin beside me like before when he would always be there.

He saved me again that day. His words weren't directed to me but hearing his melodic voice made me feel as if someone had reached a hand towards me, guiding me out of the dark pit. He was always there when I needed him.

Ever since that particular day, I listen to Jin speak through the other side of the door as if he were talking face to face with me. Sometimes I would faintly reply with an 'I miss you' or an 'I love you' but I know he can't hear me because he continues to go on.

Also since that day, Dr. Nam had been taking me out, pushing me in my wheelchair. He says my health had accelerated when he took me out the other day thus he continues to do it as my new medicine instead of the pills and daily dosages.

"Ah, it's Jin," he told me the other day while we were strolling through the patient's park. It was quite a chilly day so I was wrapped in a woolen blanket to shield me from the incoming wind.

Hearing his name alerted my attention. I asked him where Jin was and he called out with his booming voice, "Hey Jin!" But I heard no reply. Dr. Nam became deflated and told me that Jin ran away.

We continued seeing him at the park, well, at least my doctor did, and proceeding to call him but every time, I only get told that he runs away.

"Hyerin, you call him out. He's gonna ditch if I call him," Dr. Nam instructed me. I was nervous. I hadn't said his name since I made that wrong decision. I wonder if it will slide out like it use to, almost like I was born to say it.

"There he is," I could feel Dr. Nam's breath next to my ear. I gulped and prepared myself.

"J-Jin," I stuttered. It was as bad as it was the first time I spoke.

"Hyerin, he can't hear you! Louder!" He chanted, so loud the birds napping on the trees flew away. Coincidentally, Jin ran away when he recognised Dr. Man's voice. I failed to catch him.

Today, like 5 weeks ago, I have decided that this is the day. I would tell him today.

It is as cold as the other day so I have the same blanket placed on my lap. The cool air brushes against my skin making me shiver.

Dr. Nam describes the scenery to me. He does this every day so it might sound boring but to me, it's my way of sight. It's the only way I can see.

"Actually, strangely enough despite the cold temperature, the sun is shining as bright as it does in summer." Maybe this is a sign. A good sign saying that I am doing to right thing.

The wheel chair comes to a stop and I know what's happening.

"It's Jin again," he mutters under his breath and I hold mine. There is a tingling feeling in my body, as usual when I am agitated.

", he saw us. He's moving away again," Dr. Nam reports to me with a curse. This can't happen. I need to tell him. Today.

My heart skips a beat as I deeply exhale. I can do this.

"Jin, you idiot! Stop running away from me!" I shout the loudest I have ever since I was blinded.

There's a silence. Dr. Nam doesn't say a word and the only sound present is the blowing wind. I then here a faint crackling noise that gradually grew, like a section in music in crescendo. This sound is of the leaves crunching under ones feet. I can recall it from a particular piano lesson when my teacher, a world famous professor, brought me out into a field to examine noises so we could resemble expressions. Back then I was learning a piece of Autumn. I remember the earth's breath, the singing wind, flying leaves but most of all, the crackling.

"Dr. Nam, what's going on?" I ask him. I am sick and tired of this quietness and needed some updating on the world around me.

"Hey Jin." Jin?

"Hey Hyerin, hey Dr. Nam."

My Jin, he came back to me.

 It's a pretty stupid title name, right? Couldn't think of anything else but anyways,  HYERIN AND JIN ARE TOGETHER! 

Sorry for not updating for quite a while but I'm pretty sure my readers of Jeon Jungkook Online would kill me more ._.

This is actually my last chapter that I have pre-written so please don't blame me for slower updates >.<

Xoxo, Exoinspire