[Jiyong]

  "Don't fall in love with me."

  I could feel her stiffen in my arms. 

  Have you ever said something that seems to freeze your own whole body up from the inside, rendering you numb and cold, and the next moment the ice breaks, sending the splinters into every single part of you? 

  "I got it." Dara says softly and I shut my eyes. I can feel the satin smooth silky material of her dress, rendering my grip on her slippery, and I tightened my arms around her. It seems like she could disappear as suddenly as she came. 'She-has-the-freedom-to-do-whatever-she wants' became like a mantra. I recited it again and again when I'm confronted with the thought of how she may just return to her world one day; or when I see her with another man. 

  I can't shake off the subconscious thought of how Dara's small frame fits so nicely into my arms. But no matter how I liked it, no matter how much I wanted this to stay, she must not be fitted into my life. 

  Still, I want her to stay.

  I'm that selfish. 

  They say when you spent enough time with someone, love blossoms. But even flowers wither too. For once since Seunghyun hyung died, I felt fear. The void in me is never fixable, and she shouldn't be wasting her life trying to fill it up.

  Maybe in truth, I'm just scared for myself. She's hurting because this bastard couldn't even open himself up.

  I'm that gutless.

  "I know you- I mean," Dara began, "You said I'm like a sister and-" She mumbled towards the end of the sentence before I cut her off.

  "It's not that." I said tiredly.

  Whatever complicated reasons she comes up for me isn't important—none of it is true. The truth is simple.

  The people I love die.

  They all do. My mother, Seunghyun hyung. And for that reason, I tried not to love Seungri too, the only one I trusts, the one closest to a family I never had. But I failed, and for that I almost watches over him everyday in paranoia.  Whatever I touches decay. Wherever I go pain follows.

  Not you too, Dara.

  It's this simple.

  It's this selfish.

[Dara]

  4 and a half day has since passed.

  For the past few days, I've been enthusiastically avoiding Jiyong. As compared to dejection, I'm more embarrassed with myself. How can I just tell him I'm in love with him without even being sure of my feelings myself? I mean, even if that was meant for me to realise it, it should not have occurred in front of the subject of my feelings himself!

  My life is such a makjang drama.

  I'm not expecting anything from my (busted?) confession, being too horrified at myself to even take note of his reaction. But he held me and told me not to fall in love with him. In my hazy memory then that is mainly filled my my incoherent hiccoughing, he seemed to have hugged me tight, but that might be an illusion. I don't even remember how I fell asleep that night. 

  He said not to fall in love with him.

  I know that. I thought sadly. If I could help it, if only I could, I would never have. 

  We're from two different worlds. Literally. 

  I sighed, gazing out at the garden a the maidens went about doing their chores. I don't think I have the courage to face Jiyong. (My perspective: who on earth burst into ugly tears after confessing?!) 

  I want to go home. 

  But then, do I really want to? I've been yapping about how I wanted to go back, but I couldn't bring myself to really try out the possibility. What's keeping me here? Kwon Jiyong? 

  To be honest, despite being the sappy romance drama guru I am, I have never fallen in love before. I just didn't feel that kind of stirring inside me. No sparks, no butterfly, no racing heartbeat. Am I really going to have my first love under such a bizarre circumstance?

  I sighed out loud in frustration, cupping my cheeks in my palms. Oh look, through the gates come the younger package of my source of trouble. Seungri strutted into the yard, his guard stopping outside the gates, presumedly waiting for him. He didn't used to have a bodyguard with him. Who would want to harm him?

  "Yah, Park Dara!" 

  Oh god. That voice. I groaned inwardly. What does this little imp wants again?

  "So? Have you thought about what I said?" He grinned, folding his arms across his chest. 

  Eh? What did he said? I took a moment to flip through my dusty memory. Oh. Oh oh oh. He's not going to go on about that-

  "Palace ball!" He cheerfully confirmed my inner fears.

  There's no way I'm going to walk into the palace full of beautiful people looking like the haystack I am.

  I forced out a grimace. "Nope." 

  Seungri's face fell dramatically as he blinked in disbelief. Hah, this must be the first time anyone rejects this pampered lil prince. I have left my mark in history.

  As he stood like a block, recovering from his first ever downfall, I took the chance to sneak back to my room. 

  "Wait-" He protested

  "Nope, not interested!" I called back.

  "I overheard you and hyung's romance that night!" 

  I froze. What did that little git just- 

  "I left something behind and returned to take it so I happened to overhear you little stories. Anyway, it was tear-moving, but I already expected this." Seungri said smugly, lazily flicking his fingers as he leaned against the oak pillars. Shuck, he knows that he had hit the target.

  I could literally feel myself disintegrating into a pool of embarrassment. Of all the people that could have witness my first (and failed) confession, it had to be HIM.

  "Expected what?" I asked through my gritted teeth.

  "That you both are, you know, in love with each other." He almost yawned in boredom, but I could see a gleam of smugness in his eyes, as if witnessing an event that he could, (and most likely would) use as extortion towards me is the luckiest thing that ever happened. 

  "Don't you dare-" I began, but hold on, you both are in love with each other?

  "What do you mean that-" I blurted out, and Seungri raised his brow in amusement. This kid really enjoys this, isn't he?

  "Oh I'll tell you," he waved his hand mindlessly, "if you agree to go to the ball with me." 

  I snarled. Maybe that's why he needs a bodyguard. His talent of annoying would eventually catch up with him one day.

  "I can even be your personalised romance tutor." He offered.

  As much as I hate this kid, I find me hating myself more for feeling tempted. 

  "You have your deal, now spit it." I sighed in defeat as my pride gave way to curiosity. It's not like I'll be staying here forever, who cares how embarrassing I'll be at that ball. Nothing can be more degrading than that failure of a confession. Seungri would, however be humiliated for bringing over a human stack of hay for a long time. Muhahahah, no loss for me, right?

  "Why do girls always look like such a sad, affected, love stricken damsel when they're in love?" Seungri said loudly, throwing me a dirty look. "It seems like they expect the men to do all the job, to pacify and reassure them. Doesn't anyone ever realise that if it's the other way round, it might've worked too?"
 
  My my, is this little kid subtly insulting me now? But then again, he made sense. The melodramas with fluttery and pure innocent girls in beautiful love epics always ended up with the couples not being able to be together. On the other hand, couples in hilarious romance-comedy nearly always have happy endings.

  "Hyung haven't had an easy life, you know?" 

  I tore my attention from the mini drama throwbacks in my head to find Seungri, who's still leaned against the pillar, mindlessly fiddling with a small grass between his fingers. 

  "His mother died before he got to grow up and we-" Seungri paused, the playful tone from his voice gone now. "We lost a brother. His name was Seunghyun and he taught us everything. Jiyong hyung was the closest to him and he wasn't the same after he died."

  The brother Jiyong hated to talk about.

  The youngest prince was lost in his own world, unable to hide the sad look in his eyes. For the first time, he didn't look like that ignorant, pampered heir that he seems to be, as if his image of a young idling Casanova was painstakingly built up by himself to hide the horrible pasts that I would never know. I felt an inch of pity for him. No matter how much he irritates me, he seems to have a good heart beneath that mischievous surface.
 

  "THATTS WHYY," Seungri resumed, sounding all lazy and okay again, "I expected him to give you a reply like that. After all what else can you expect from a zombie that has been tough all his life? To play your masculine, suave prince in a shining suit?"

  "Are you suggesting that he may actually-" I started, surprised to find, can it be, hope?

  "I'm not suggesting anything about him." Seungri said, throwing me a look of disgust as if I can't even understand the simplest word there is. "I'm suggesting what YOU can do." 

  "And that is?" 

  "Be like me," he winks, kicking himself off the pillar, "fight for what'ya want." 
 

  Fight for.. what I want?

  What is it that I really want? 

  To try.

  I want to try.

  I want to go for it, for once.

  "Fight for what you want!" I repeated loudly, feeling more refreshed and recharged than I have ever felt in a longgg time. I've gained enlightenment. He's right. Why should I be mopping around all day? I can be the own heroine for my story! ASSA!!!

  Seungri waved two fingers in the air as his guard bowed to him—the same thing Jiyong did when I told him I'll find a way back to my own world that day where he cornered him between him and the wall. They're really brothers huh. I chuckled to myself.

  "Don't forget our deal! The ball is next week!" Seungri called back.

  Oh the ball can wait.

[-]  

  Jiyong stashed his sword back into its case as he looked beyond the river with furrowed eyes. The Taeyangs had been silent for days now. They used to fire arrows into the river as a form of military aggresion every once in a while, but they had stopped, and the silence does not necessarily means good. He couldn't figure them out.

  "Still no signs?" Jiyong asked calmly as his right hand man returned. Together they gaze towards the neighbouring territory with perplexed thoughts.

  "No, my lord. They have withdrew all soldiers and warriors usually stationed there too."

  Jiyong exhaled loudly. What on earth is it that they are planning? He needs to raise their guards up. Any wrong move he makes may be unforgivable. It concerns the thousands of lives of those in the Fire City.

  "Get reinforcements. Keep a close track of any subtle movement they make." Jiyong ordered, and his commando nodded in adherence.

  Jiyong comtemplated his strategies, but before he had a proper time to formulate them, a loud,bubbly voice broke his chain of thoughts, startling both of the warriors.

  "ICE LORDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!"

  There's no mistakening about that voice, and the first bubble that popped up inside Jiyong's head was, why on earth is Dara here? This is so close to the frontline! If her voice had'nt sound that excited, the first reaction Jiyong would have would be alarm. Dara is always prone to danger.

  "HEY!" Dara stopped infront of them, her hands on her waist as she bent over, huffing from running all the way there. Jiyong blinked at her in surprise. It had been days since that night and she has been keenly avoiding his attempts to apologise or even to simply speak with her. Why the change of attitude?

  "Lets go." Dara grabbed Jiyong's wrist, ignoring his splutters of protest. "Is he busy now?" Dara asked the innocent commando beside them, who looked on in complete shock.

  "N-no." The commando stammered, flustered.

  "Great!" Dara grinned, pulling Jiyong into a run.

  "Where are we going?" Jiyong asked with a raised brow. He has no trouble keeping up with Dara.

  "To that hill, we've been there before, remember? I brought food. The maidens said you haven't got time to eat since yesterday."

  Jiyong smiled in amusement, which Dara did not see as she kept her eyes on the front. He hadn't realised that he missed the feeling of her skin and that hyped and curious tone in her voice that had been absent for a long while.

  As Jiyong ate, Dara sat a little away from him, still feeling awkward. This is a big step, but she hopes that he will know that she is alright now and he doesn't have to keep trying to apologise. 

  "Dara, you know I can't-" Jiyong said after a while, breaking the silence. 

  "Don't say anything!" Dara yelped, beating him to it and Jiyong closes his mouth again. "I know what you're going to say." She knows he's going to tell her how she can't go on having feeling for him. "But you don't have to feel sorry for whatever I do or feel. You won't be able to help it, because I can't help it myself." She smiled embarrased.

  "You won't like me for long." Jiyong said quietly. "You don't know what kind of a person I am."

  She's like a child in the candy store. She'll love the taste of him, the protection he makes her feels. But eventually the taste will fade and there will come a point where she doesn't need protection anymore. Then, like everyone else, she will leave him. She will leave and it will hurt. And he doesn't want to experience it again.

  Dara brooded over his words, but it seems to only complicate the situation. Can't it be simple? That she likes him and that's all that she needs to think or worry about?

  "Does it matter?" Dara asked.

  The thoughts that Jiyong had in his head dissolved away at her sincere question. He couldn't understand why isn't she scared of him like everyone else is. Why isn't she wary? Why is she so happy? How can she live so cheerfully? 
 

  Dara rubs her nose as the silence between them stretched again and fiddled with the bow and sachet of arrows that he had left on the ground beside them. Being easily distracted, Dara stood up and dragged the heavy bag of arrows with a hand while the other holds the bow to some distance away from a tree. Jiyong smiled inwardly at the sight. She reminded him of a rabbit that insist of stealing two carrots that it wouldn't be able to move instead of just one.

  Dara loaded an arrow in the bow sloopily, recalling how people in historical dramas like Jumong and Queen Seondeok would do it, and lifted it up, aimed right at the tree. 

  Before she could release the string, however, a pair of arms wrapped themselves around her, taking each of her palms. Dara stiffened, not daring to look back behind her. She could already feel his breath against her neck as she lost control of her raging heartbeat again. 

  "Your grip is wrong, move your hand downwards." Jiyong mumbled, shifting her small hand to the handle. "Hold your arm out and open your legs to your shoulder length. You'll end up shooting your own feet like this."

  Dara gulped. She didn't know which is worse, shooting her own feet, or dying of cardiac arrest.

  Jiyong grabbed her hand that had frozen on the string, shifting his fingers so that the tail of the arrow now rests between her index and middle knuckles. 

  "Shoot." Jiyong said, stepping away from her finally. Dara blinked as she recovered from her own vegetative state, and release the string.

  It landed not far away from her pathetically.

  Dara bits her lips in humiliation and shuts her eyes tightly. How did she forget to pull the string??? She opens an eye slightly to look at Jiyong, who was silently doubling over in laughter. 

  "It's my first time!" Dara protested. It's all because Jiyong had to step in and fluster her so much that she couldn't even think striaght. 

  The look on her face almost made Jiyong wants to wipe away a tear. Is this how his ancestors in the 21st century shoot arrows? Does the string launch the arrow automatically?

  "I'll teach you so that you can protect yourself." Jiyong said between laughters, although he really isn't very convinced that she can even hold a bow properly.

  
  They spent the afternoon shooting trees and fooling around. Jiyong realised the fact that he only manages to laugh when she is around her, and that he only manages to smile when she is smiling. He knew that this is a battle that he could never win.

  "I told you, hold it here! You'll snap your fingers!" Jiyong said loudly, again moving Dara's hand to the correct position as she stuck out her tongue at her forgetfulness. Well to her defence, she thought, archery is considered a sport and I am never good at sports. She wonders how Jiyong is able to hit every exact spot she challenged him to hit.

  "No that's not how you do it, Dara, give it here!" Jiyong laughed, snatching the bow over.

  "No!" Dara tugged at the young prince's armour that he hadn't removed, reaching for the bow that he's trying to aim. For once Jiyong feels what it would feels like to be a kid. The child in him died before he even got a chance to play.

  They fell over on the grass, dropping the bow as they laughed. The sky seems exceptionally blue tonight, and there weren't any clouds.

  Such a good day to be in love.

  But then again, a small part of Jiyong's head kept trying to get his attention, to remind him of who he really is and what he is living for as his chuckles gradually faded away.

  Jiyong turns his head to the side and glances at the girl, who had her eyes closed and a smile etched on her lips, enjoying the warm sunlight on her face. He remmebers how Seungri had once told him that she is kind of pretty, but he thinks that she is more than that.

  He wants to keep her safe and the only way is for himself to not be this attched to her. But recently his will seems to be fading. He just can't do it. 

  "It's dangerous." Jiyong says softly, "For us to be like this."

  "What's life without a little danger?" Dara replied, her eyes still shut.

  Jiyong smiled.

  "LORD KWON!" A series of heavy footsteps made Jiyong jumped onto his feet as he regained his usually emotionless face. "I finally found you!"

  The commando rushes up the hill, panting, as he steals a glance at Dara, who had fallen asleep on the comfortable grass under the warm sunlight. Jiyong realised how weird they must've looked to his soldier now, for them to be on a secluded hill and the girl asleep.

  "Princess Kiko is at your residence, and she's waiting for you." The commando informs. Jiyong looks back at the girl and sighs.

  "I get it. Take her back when she wakes up, be careful not to wake her." Jiyong said, slinging his bowover his arms as he gave Dara one last look.

  He unconsciously wishes that he could be here instead when she wakes up.

Wow, that's a long chapter.

On a side note:

I SURPASSED 100 SUSCRIPTIONS!!!!!

(Does the marinated crab dance)

Thank you all so much for everything, even though I don't update that quicky. 

I love all of you!

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