Sunday. The day in which we’re caught in between being lazy and completing our works. On a day like this, Chanyeol would usually sit leisurely on his couch. He’d play the PS3 that he just bought using the birthday allowance from his dad. However, life decided to curse on him.

The clouds were dark, as if it was mourning over something. Minutes later it started crying. The tears of rain flooded the asphalt and the grounds, streaming down to the drains. Then thunders followed after. It sounded furious, it roars and rumbles through the place like an angry beast searching for its prey. The lightning came with so much force it crackled the ears of the citizens. It was 3 in the afternoon and it looked like twilight already.

Albeit his liking towards moist rainy days, the weather had resultant the entire whole building to have a power outage. That means a total blackout and a farewell to PS3.

Chanyeol laid down on his bed despite being in a dark room with a hot temperature. Contemplating whether or not to call his friends and loiter anywhere that actually have their electric working, he decided to not to.

He thought that maybe majority of them were probably out of the country considering the fact that they were on their semester break. Chanyeol is a 22 years old bachelor studying to gain his degree in Economics. He strives to be a successful businessman particularly in the commerce and trading fields.

It’s a surprise to those around him actually. For a person who has so many sense of humour and generally sense, he sure is very ambitious. He’s the type of person that will annoy you. Plenty of times; and you’d hit him. Plenty of times. But somehow, you will choose him to be inside your circle because you need amusement in your life, don’t deny it.

After the endless thoughts, Chanyeol finally chose to drive… To nowhere.

He thought that maybe if he continue driving for hours around the city, he will stumble upon something that will make him park his car and walk around aimlessly doing nothing. That was his plan for that day. “An aimless adventure” he thought to himself as he started to drive.

30 minutes passed by, and still, Chanyeol was wandering around the central city without any purpose. His stomach started growling, pleading to be fed. His throat was dry, asking him to drink. Chanyeol took a left turn heading towards the isolated side of the town. The wipers moved from left to right, clearing the windshield. It suddenly somehow became a bore to him.

A sign caught his attention. It was a vintage plaque with the word ‘BEAN & GONE’ on it, in some way the sign screamed to him, asking him to visit the place. So he did. Chanyeol parked his car in front the vintage looking shop and turned off the car’s engine.

He opened the door and ran towards the front entrance to avoid getting himself wet.

As he strode his ways and stopped at the front door, he read the sign hanging on the door, “OPENED”. Slowly, Chanyeol opened the entrance door. The bell chimes followed, surprising him. “Welcome to Bean & Gone” the baristas yelled happily, welcoming him inside. Chanyeol smiled at no one in particular and nodded as a reply to the greeting.

He registered the coffee shop. What greets him first was the smell of brewed coffee beans, the aroma of the bitterness yet invitingly warm smell filled the atmosphere, making his taste buds ache for the smooth warm coffee he longed for.

The coffee shop was cosy. If Chanyeol had to describe it in any other way, he’d say the place feels as though it hugs people. He could feel the comfortable embrace of affection and friendliness vibe from it.

“Having here sir?” the worker asked with a huge smile on his face. Chanyeol smiled back and nodded.

“What would you like to have for today?” Chanyeol looked at the menu that hung above the counter top behind the worker.

“I would like to have one hot Americano and two chocolate muffins please” he ordered.

“That would be 6000won. Please take a sit first, it will be send in a short while” the worker said.

Chanyeol paid for it before taking a sit at the corner end of the coffee shop. He put his wallet and phone down on the table and released a sigh. “Finally…” Chanyeol muttered under his breath as he felt comfortable and relaxed with his position. While waiting for his orders, Chanyeol deliberately analysed the people that were in the shop. It’s not that he was judging them or anything, it was just intentional because he didn’t know what else is there to do then… look.

From left to right, the boy turned his head ever so slowly until something caught his sight. It made him stopped. Sitting comfortably at the other end of the shop was a girl. A girl that wore a simple blouse with skinny jeans sat there with crossing leg, leaning on the sofa as if she was at home. She had long wavy hair that was tied loosely into a bun.

What made Chanyeol stopped was not that he fell in love at the first sight with her. He did not have any butterflies in his stomach. He did not feel nervous and his eyes did not dilate. The reason he stopped at the sight of her was curiosity.

The girl was sitting there alone. She was reading a book ever so passionately that he could see her furrowed eyebrows and scrunched up nose. ‘Cute’. He thought. On top of that, her coffee was left there on the table, untouched.

Curious isn’t it?

“Why is she, a beautiful girl, alone in an isolated coffee shop reading a book like her life was dependant on it that her drink is still full and untouched?” he thought to himself.

The worker came later and put the tray on the coffee table, interrupting Chanyeol’s trail of thoughts. “Enjoy your meal” she said as she left before Chanyeol could even thank her. Without further or do, the tall lad ate the muffins and enjoyed looking at the crying sky from the glass window. He stole some glances at the girl from time to time, just to check if she drink the coffee on the table. But even as he was done with all his foods and drink, she was still in the same position as she was from before.

Chanyeol did not even realise it himself that he was staring at her. “Such a strange girl” he thought. He brushed it off and took his phone to check the notifications that he received. For the next hour Chanyeol sat there, playing with his phone as he waited for the rain to stop.

He stopped playing the game on his phone as his ringtone played, with the caller ID ‘Unicorn Mummy’ on the screen.

“Yeap Mom?” he said right after he answered the call.

“Honey can you come home and help me with this broken door knob please?” she pleaded. Chanyeol looked outside the window and saw that the rain stopped.

“Sure, I’ll be there in 10minutes” he replied. They ended the call and Chanyeol took the liberty to buy some pastries for his mother before leaving. As he was walking along the paths in between the alignments of the sofas to the door, he heard the sound of a book being slam on the table. Chanyeol turned his head to the sound and found the girl drinking her coffee gently as she finished it off in one go. She had a soft warming smile on her lips as she put the mug down on the table.

He didn’t know what it was that made him stopped, again. But this time though, there it was… he felt the butterflies present in his stomach. He suddenly felt as though he stopped breathing although his heart beats accelerated faster. How was that even possible? That smile made him feel like the two of them were the only one there. As though the whole world shut down and there was a big spotlight on her.

“Wow…” he muttered under his breath.

The first Sunday… and he fell into the pit of love.

The next day, Chanyeol woke up early and purposely ditched his PS3. He sat inside his car from eight in the morning and waited for the girl but she never came. This became his daily routine until the next Sunday came.

She drove a white Beetle and parked it beside his car. Chanyeol who was jamming to Bob Marley’s song playfully was caught off guard when she came out of her car. Quickly, he turned off the engine and went outside.

He followed behind her into the shop and he matched his steps with her. As they were in front of the counter, he could smell her scent that brushed his nose. “Lavender…” he thought.

“Hanna! You came early today. So would you like the usual?” the worker greeted her. ‘So her name is Hanna…” Chanyeol thought again.

“Yeah the usual” she said with a smile plastered on her face. For the first time, he heard her voice and it made his heart pounded faster. It was so… calming.

He realized it was his chance to start something between them so he took a step ahead and smiled at her before saying, “Make that two please” and gave out some cash to pay. He didn’t even know what ‘the usual’ was but that’s what you do when your attention is at the one you’re attracted to.

Hana was caught off guard. She was surprised with the man beside her. All her life, never had she ever experience any guy buying anything for her. “Urm…” she hummed as they sat at her usual place.

“I’m sorry if I surprised you. I’m Chanyeol” he said offering his hand. The girl shook it and smiled softly, “Hanna”. The start of it all and they didn’t even realise their eyes dilated.

Their drinks came later, two mugs of black coffee was placed on the table and Chanyeol grinned. “So your ‘usual’ is my favourite. Do you always hang around here every Sunday?” he asked.

Hana chuckled and nodded her head. “How did you know I come here every Sunday?” she asked taking a sip from her coffee.

“Well I actually came here for the very first time last week, on a Sunday. I saw you sitting right here and you read a book without a care in the world. Like literally! The world could be invaded by unicorns and you’d still be here reading your book” he said and it made her laugh. Chanyeol stopped speaking as he heard it, it was like music to his ears. So it is true. They say in order to make a girl fall for you is by making her laugh. But when she laughed he’s the one that fall deeper.

“I’m sorry but how old are you?” she asked as she realised he was in a trance.

“Huh? Oh I’m 22, studying my degree in Economics. How about you?” Chanyeol said as he leaned closer to her.

“I’m 20 this year” she answered back and smiled. “Are you still studying or…?” he questioned further. “Yeah I’m studying Journalism” “I can see you’ve got a thing for books” he said jokingly.

“Yeap, I love them! Like if I could choose a secret world to live, I’d choose the fantasy realms in books” she said in glee. Chanyeol let out a laugh and asked what the book that she read the other day was.

“Oh it’s The Timekeeper by Mitch Albom. That was actually the first ever book that I finished in 3 hours” Hanna answered. Something triggered Chanyeol to try and read this book, the book that made her travel away from reality. The book that made her choose to stay outside the sanity of reality. “Mind if I try and read it?” “Oh yeah sure! I have it here with me” she said and took the book from her bag.

Hanna thought that Chanyeol was very friendly. Their conversations went from their introduction of each other to their favourite Disney princesses. He was easy to talk to, and it made her at ease that their flow was going well. Hanna had always been an awkward person. She’d rather spend her time in her world of fantasies than dwell with the corrupted norm of the society. It was not that she’s an introvert, she just choose to be quiet around some people.

They had promised to meet each other again the next Sunday at the same time and the same place. Not that Chanyeol intentionally plan to, it was because he had to give the book back to her. Hanna being the kind-hearted person she was lend it to him for a week and they exchanged numbers to keep in contact.

Monday came and Hanna had woken up early to leave for her volunteering work. She would usually visit the hospital every Saturday, but she was in her semester break and she thought it would be nice to drop in on the kids.

It was noon when she got there with homemade cookies and pretzels. The nurse was glad that she came and appointed her to the kids’ playroom. “Kids, look who came to surprise you today” the nurse said that made the playing, running and jumping kids turned their heads towards the door.

“HANNA!” they yelled and ran to the girl. “You came today!” one of them stated and they hugged her tightly. They are kids diagnosed with cancer and it had always been an amazing experience for Hanna to witness their bravery and courage. She gave them the bag of cookies and pretzels to enjoy as she sat in one of the small colourful stool at the corner.

“So what book shall we read today?” she asked them. Mark, a seven years old kid fighting lung cancer stood up and screamed “THE LITTLE PRINCE!” and the others cheered after him, clearly supporting his preference. Hanna shook her head at their enthusiasm as she took the book and read it.

On the same day, Chanyeol was busy playing guitar along with his charmingly idiotic best friend, Baekhyun. They had been friends since kindergarten and it amazes both of them how they have not killed each other due to their extreme annoyance yet. But that is what love do. Flaws become funny sarcasms and beauties are highlighted.

He was sitting crossed legs on his favourite couch, feeling inspired after he finished reading the book he borrowed. Chanyeol had literally spent his whole night reading a book, something that happens once in a million year. Baekhyun was sprawled on the floor getting snugly with the beam bags. He was playing his phone as he hummed to the rhythms of Chanyeol’s talented strumming fingers.

“Dude I’m bored” Baekhyun cried, kicking his legs childishly. Chanyeol who was focusing ignored the later completely. Baekhyun glanced at his friends and found him concentrating on his left finger on the fret board. He found this strange as Chanyeol had never been so… out of place. At least not when he’s studying.

“Chanyeol!” he yelled, still laying on the floor. However Chanyeol did not even move a bit, yet alone reply to him. Annoyed and irritated that he was being ignored, Baekhyun stood up and went to the kitchen to get some candy treats for himself. As he was walking back into the living room with a bag of marshmallows and a mug of tea, Chanyeol’s phone rang.

On reflex, the tall lad took his phone that was on the coffee table as quick as a lightning bolt, “Ouch” Baekhyun muttered under his breath.

“Yeap sis” he said excitingly. Hearing this, Baekhyun could’ve guess it was Yura─ Chanyeol’s elder sister who was calling him. She had always been there to pick them up from their usual hang-out spots in their high school days. Baekhyun found it sweet that she treated him equally as her own brother, and he liked that as he was the only child in his family.

“…what…? What happened? Yeah sure I’ll be there… I’m going now” Chanyeol said, his voice sounded worried. As he ended the call, Baekhyun jumped in front of him, “What happened?” he asked.

“My nephew is in the hospital” he answered and stood up taking his keys on the table. “Be a good bodyguard and follow me” Chanyeol said jokingly to Baekhyun who was so pissed off he made faces as he ran up to his friend.

“Why is he in the hospital?” Baekhyun questioned as he buckled up the seatbelts.

“I don’t really know the full story but he got an asthma attack again, and he’s coughing badly” Chanyeol answered and drove to the hospital.

His nephew was ecstatic when his favourite uncles arrived. It was a given fact, they could spend their whole day playing PS3 together without food or even sleep and they’d still live. “How are you feeling buddy?” Chanyeol asked as he ruffled his nephew’s hair. His sister was standing beside him. A satisfied smile was plastered on her face, she was glad that his brother could make his son happy by just being there.

Hours after playing games together, Chanyeol excused himself to buy some drinks at the cafeteria as his throat felt extremely dry. “Want me to come with you?” Baekhyun offered but Chanyeol refused it and asked him to stay with his nephew instead. Yura had went back home to get some clothes for herself to stay overnight so they had to look out for her son.

Walking along in the hallway to the elevator, Chanyeol passed by the kids’ playroom carelessly and went to the elevator. One glimpse to his right and he could’ve seen her inside, playing with the children. If only he turned his head…if only.

By the time Hanna finished off her volunteering work, it was nearly 10 in the evening and the sky was dark with breezy winds blowing off moderately. She walked out of the entrance door and let out a heavy sigh. She felt it again, the sentiment crawling underneath her skin. The uncomfortable feeling as if she was displaced.

She closed her eyes and tried to control it. “Focus Hanna, you can fight it… you’re better than this… but what if..? No! You can fight it!” her thoughts were interrupted when Chanyeol touched her right shoulder gently. “Hanna?”

He had a worried expression on his face. Truthfully, Chanyeol was actually surprised to find her as he walked out of the hospital. But she was breathing heavily and her eyes were closed. Chanyeol didn’t know how to greet her, the whole situation could’ve been really awkward if he does a little mistake.

Hanna turned around, shocked and flabbergasted. She stood there with teary eyes and heaving breathing, speechless as if there was a block in . “Are you okay? What are you doing here?” Chanyeol asked again, leaning his head sideways. His eyes were looking directly at her, it was not ‘just’ looking─ he was trying to look underneath her façades, searching for her soul. For her truths.

“Huh…? Yeah, yeah I’m okay, I’m fine” Hanna answered, finally awoken from her trance of thoughts. She was aware of Chanyeol’s curiosity so she put on a grin on her face sheepishly and turned her body towards him.

“Sorry, I was just really tired. I came for my volunteering work here at the child’s health centre… and you?” she asked him, trying to act calm.

“Oh my nephew got admitted, he had an asthma attack” Chanyeol answered her question and nodded at the thought of her kind work. “So you work here?” he asked and pointed towards the building behind him.

“Mmhmm… sometimes, when I’m free. It’s very fun though!” she replied jubilantly. Chanyeol smiled in admiration. Pretty, smart and kind. The perfect combination.

“So if I ask you if I could come along, would you bring me?” he asked with a playful grin on his face. The sound of the bus’ arrival made her turned around and walked towards it. She stopped at the bus door and spun towards Chanyeol.

Hanna let out a sarcastic scoff and smirked mischievously, “Well if you ask me that is… try asking first Chanyeol” she said and winked at him. “But… wait” Chanyeol’s word were cut off when Hanna replied to him, “Meet me here this Sunday at ten in the morning, we’ll go to the café after” she added and the bus moved, leaving a confused Chanyeol behind.

His thoughts were interrupted when Baekhyun continuously honked the car and screamed to him, “CHANYEOL! CHANYEOL! EARTH TO CHANYEOL! GET IN THE CAR YOU EXTREMELY TALL STINKING CHEESEHEAD!”

Dreadful days passed by longer than Chanyeol thought it would until it was Saturday. He had stood by the hospital’s entrance door and waited for Hanna with a bag of fruits for the patients. Chanyeol couldn’t ignore his beating heart and sweating palms, it was more irritating yet satisfying at the same time. Is this what they all call “nervous for love”?

“Chanyeol!” Hanna yelled excitedly and stride away from the bus. Chanyeol looked up and smiled as she arrived. In his eyes, beautiful does not even define her beauty. It was as if he was lost at words. Funny, Hanna was only wearing a simple black jeans with a sweet casual blouse. Does love really seduce our mind and blind our eyes?

Hanna introduced the kids to Chanyeol and their day was spend productively with a bunch of children seeking for life. Amazing how they felt alive instead. They walked to the café side by side, their hands were brushing towards each other and they can’t help but to scream inwardly. It would be easier if human could read minds but then again wouldn’t that be less adventurous.

As they arrived, Chanyeol took the liberty to open the doors for her and Hanna was shy to admit it to herself that she had goosebumps at his gentle behaviour. She found it lovely how he made sure she walked by the inside instead of the outer side of the pavements, or how he glanced at her once in a while to make sure she’s by his side. As well as how he pulls her closer ever so gently whenever there’s a passer-by. She likes it how he puts himself second after her.

They ordered their usual and sat at the same spot, it somehow became a habit. They always sit there. They tend to sit there. They would sit there. They keep sitting there.

To them, it felt as though it was no longer something that they like. It is something that both love and will do. In other words, the feeling was similar to when you’re returning back to your house after a long day at work. Even if it’s a broken home, you’d still go back there. Because that is the only place close to the word home. Though home is never a place, it’s a feeling.

Maybe that was the reason as to why they would sit there. Because they feel at home.

“Soo…” Chanyeol said, trying to start a conversation. Hanna who was drinking her coffee put the mug down and raised her eyebrows at him.

“What are you doing this week?” he asked nervously. Pondering to himself if his question was obvious that he was asking her out.

Hanna’s eyes moved to her left, recalling back her schedule for the week. “Well other than going to the hospital, I will probably spend my time alone in bed… why?” she asked as she looked at him with a questioning gaze.

Chanyeol bit his lips as he rubbed his nape─ a habit of his whenever he’s nervous. “Let’s… let’s go out…” he said, his eyes grew bigger.

“…together” the boy added in whisper. Hanna thought Chanyeol’s behaviour was undeniably odd and strange. ‘Is he courting me?’ she thought to herself. She brushed off her assumptions, thinking that it was impossible to happen. ‘I mean, who would want to date me…’

“I guess, yeah sure…” she answered half-heartedly.

They had promised each other to meet at the famous shopping mall for lunch on Friday. Though Chanyeol did want to fetch her, Hanna insisted not to. The girl thought that it would be too troublesome for Chanyeol.

Those four days were incredibly exhausting for Hanna. Why? Because she did nothing but stay at home, locked in her own trance of thoughts. Well the monsters are not underneath the bed, but instead, inside her mind.

Friday came and it took Hanna almost all of her courage and self-motivation to get herself together and put on the best of the best act to finally step inside reality. To push away all of those loathsome thoughts and keep it behind her head, in the deepest part of her brain. Nonetheless, the girl is witty enough to know that it will come back forth in an uglier form.

But still, she had to take the risk. She need to meet Chanyeol. She promised. And breaking promises is the most despicable thing in her opinion.

Chanyeol stood in front of the restaurant’s entrance like a soldier waiting for his command. However, only god knows that the lad was actually fidgeting inside. ‘Is she ditching me? Should I call? Nahh, it’ll make me look desperate. But I am desperate… But why is she so late…’ he pondered, heaving a sigh as he checked his wrist watch for the umpteenth time.

Hanna arrived and walked behind him in guilt. Not because she was late. Well a bit, but the reason was more to the fact that she herself was battling a civil war inside. A battle between herself… and herself. She was both winning and losing.

She closed the gap between them and put her soft delicate hands on Chanyeol’s left shoulder, surprising him. He turned around and his once frowning lips curved upwards, smiling in glee at her appearance.

“I’m... I’m sorry… I really am” she said but before she could give her reasons, Chanyeol beat her to it. He said that she don’t have to explain herself to him and that it was an honour to wait for her.

They went inside the restaurant and took their lunch. It was different for them though they tried to hide it. It had become a norm to them to eat at their usual spot in the café and now that they were in a totally different place with a different environment, it was an odd feeling.

As they finished their foods, both of them walked side by side in the shopping mall. Chanyeol felt that the atmosphere was slowly turning gloomy and that’s the last thing he would want to happen. He took her hand and grinned playfully as he pulled her into the shop. ‘Girls like shopping… right?’ he thought, scheming an idea in his head.

“Chanyeol, where are going?” Hanna grumbled as they passed by the clothing racks. “Just follow me… I saw something” he said and dragged her to the side of the store. It was a thrift shop that sells literally everything from head to toe. On the wall in front of her was costumes and tiaras hanged accordingly. Hanna smiled in surrender and looked at Chanyeol, giving him the ‘Seriously…’ look.

“Come on! It’s cute” Chanyeol said and took a diadem with pink fake diamonds, placing it on her head. He then took a crown and placed it on his head, grinning mischievously. Hanna looked at him, trying to restrain herself from laughing as that will give Chanyeol the satisfaction of success.

He let out a chuckle as he shoved her body to the side. They stood in front of the mirror looking at their reflection. Hanna turned her head to Chanyeol, he was looking at her from the mirror and she was looking at him in reality. She was in awe. He gave out so much happiness and smiles towards everyone around him. How was that even possible? To bring bliss and contentment in a world of frauds, deceits and cruelty. They say to be jovial in a ruthless world is courage, not weakness.

Chanyeol continued looking at her from the mirror. The fact that she was looking at him made his heart flutter. She was so fragile and passionate that he felt the needs to protect her. To hug her and shield her from everything that comes. To bring the best in her and stare into her eyes because he liked her soft gazes.

“You look beautiful” he whispered as he turned his head, looking directly at her. She blinked once, twice, thrice… and looked down in embarrassment. Her cheeks shows a gradient of red, she was blushing madly and Chanyeol couldn’t help but to let out a soft chuckle. He brought his right hand to her chin, making her look at him again. Her eyes were full of hesitation, it was obvious that he was making her nervous and she bit her lower lips waiting for the next second to happen.

“I’m going to buy this” Chanyeol said and took a step behind. He grabbed the tiara on her head and hold her hand with the other. It felt nice in her opinion. She felt safe. She felt like home when their hands were together.

Hanna thought that it was a waste of money but Chanyeol had her convinced that the crowns commemorate the start of their relationship. He’s the prince and she’s the princess. It’s adorable how Hanna thought he meant it as friends. He sure meant more than that.

As they pass by a famous known fast food restaurant, Chanyeol decided to try one of his pick-up lines. “Hey Hanna…” he said.

Hanna glanced at him once and hummed in response.

“Are you McDonald?” he asked out of a sudden and grinned at her sheepishly.

“Uhh… obviously no…” she answered, wondering what has gotten to the boy.

“Really? Because I’m lovin’ it” he said and winked at her boldly. Finally realizing the situation of his failed attempt, Hanna exploded laughing in the middle of the shopping mall. It made Chanyeol grinned wider at her joyful face, glad that he could bring unicorns in her fairy-tale.

“Oh god, that was really bad!” she stated as she tried to regain her composure. Chanyeol let out chuckle and asked, “Really?” They continued walking side by side, only closer this time with her hands in his. “I need to learn more pick-up lines” he added after.

The both of them went out together often after that. Maybe it was because they had finally realize how they had affected each other’s presence. Their usual date on Sunday had never been betrayed, they will meet there for their weekly dose.

On that one particular chilly night, Chanyeol offered to walk Hanna back home as it was the appropriate thing to do. He was raised by a queen, he wouldn’t treat any girl lesser than a princess.

Maybe it was the starry night sky. Maybe it was the fact that her wavy brunette hair was flowing softly as the wind blew. Maybe it was her adorable simple white dress that made her look so pure. Maybe it was her shining eyes that was full of wonders. Maybe it was Chanyeol himself. He didn’t know what came upon him. Was it because he watched Avengers before that made him so inspired? That made him so brave. That made him grow some balls.

As they arrived in front of her apartment’s building, Hanna turned to face Chanyeol. She smiled genuinely at him. Before she gave her gratitude, Chanyeol beat her to it. “Hanna…” he said abruptly.

Hanna lifted her forehead, a gesture that showed her curiosity.

Chanyeol cleared his throat and bit his lip anxiously. Before he spoke his thought, the tall boy rubbed his nape, his eyes wander around the asphalt ground. Somehow the sight became comforting to him rather than meeting her eyes. Because if he does, he might’ve just kissed her without any words.

“Chanyeol…?” Hanna said, trying to steal his attention. “What is it?” she asked the latter.

He mustered all of his courage and bravery. Chanyeol took a deep breath and looked up, meeting his eyes with hers. It was as though the world were pushing him at the edge of the building to fall into his death. Well in his opinion, at least if it really were to happen, at least he’d know he’ll fall into his death. But this, is another thing. He didn’t know the answer, he didn’t know what will come after.

“Hanna I like you” he confessed.

Chanyeol closed his eyes waiting for the answer. In hope she’d say yes. In hope she’ll accept his confession. In hope to finally experience what love really means. But it never came…

The boy opened his eyes only to find Hanna staring into space. Into nothing. It was as though her soul flew away from her body and wandered somewhere in a place he’d never come across. “Hanna…?” he said.

Hanna’s eyes dilated and looked at him. She had tears in her eyes, waiting for the call to fall unto her pale blushing cheeks. He couldn’t tell if she was scared or just extremely at awe. Because the truth was, she was at both. She was extremely at awe as the awaiting moment of her entire life is finally happening right in front of her eyes but then she was also scared because the awaiting moment of her entire life is happening right in front of her eyes. As complicated as it sounds, it does make sense.

Not knowing what to do, not knowing what to say, and not knowing what to reply... Hanna turned around and ran into her building, not looking back… at all.

Chanyeol stood there, both surprised and shocked at what just happened. He did not just fall into his death, he was resurrected back into a life more cruel than it already is. “Does she hate me that much…?” he asked himself, whispering into the silent thin air.

Brutal isn’t it? Life… human do not just feel pain, they deliver it to others too.

That night, Chanyeol walked back to his house feeling as if he had nothing left to breathe. As if he had nothing left to live his life as it used to be.

But a story is not a story if it doesn’t touch other’s perception.

Hanna was in her bed alone, all crawled up with pillows and blankets around her. She laid her head to the bed’s headboard and sighed for the umpteenth time. The thing about being alone is human tend to not feel lonely at all, because having a conversation with yourselves could either bring you to your dreamy imaginations or your terrible nightmares. Either one, both will definitely kill you because the reason as to why you were doing it in the first place, is because of your wish to run away from reality.                                       

‘It’s here… again’ Hanna thought to herself.

The girl was in a dilemma. After all, a battle with yourself is the worst of all. Because you do not know what should be done and what should be avoided to happen. After all this years, Hanna waited for this moment to happen. She dreamt about this, she anticipated and dreadfully waited for it to happen. It was her 4 a.m. thoughts, it was what she desired to happen. For someone to finally be there for her. For someone to hug her and be a reliever to her pains. For someone to sing her lullabies and make her sleep in comfort and peace. For someone to tell her that he’d protect her and that she doesn’t have to battle this war alone anymore. She desired it to happen.

But now that it is finally here, she doesn’t know what to do. She was stuck. Because what if this will end up badly like any other relationship. What if love is just a silly thing people made up to cover the masked lies. What if Chanyeol wanted to deceive her? What if…

Sitting in her bed all alone…

Hanna was both the murderer and the victim. And the weapon used to kill herself mentally was depression.

 

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