chapter eight: viii. hope & hospital visits

“Jongdae oppa!” I grinned as I hobbled over on my crutches and hugged him lightly. “How are your ribs? And your legs?”

Jongdae was practically beaming in happiness. He was in a sitting position; sitting against the frame of the head of the bed.

“My ribs are okay. But my legs… I’m on painkillers now-for them,” Jongdae grinned.

“Wait what? Painkillers? Does that mean…” I trailed off, eyes wide.

“Yes, it means that I have a chance of walking again! I woke up in pain because I could feel my legs, which means that I’m not paralyzed, completely, at least!” Jongdae beamed.

My hand dropped to my mouth. “Oh my god, oppa! OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!!!”

“Where are the others, I want to tell them!” Jongdae practically shone with happiness.

“Well last time I saw them, they were arguing over what to buy at the vending machine…” I trailed off, chuckling, still unable to process what Jongdae had just told me.

They trailed through the door, laughing and pushing each other, and then realized that both of us were grinning like idiots.

“What happened?” Junmyeon asked, the first to catch on that something amazing had happened.

“OPPA CAN FEEL HIS LEGS!!” I screamed in excitement, waving my arms up and down and resisting the urge of jumping up and down.

There was total silence. Some of them blinked a few times, and some of them looked at each other and back to us to make sure it was true. Then all of a sudden everyone started cheering, jumping up and down, hugging each other tightly, and for some, crying in happiness.

I turned to Jongdae and smiled. There was hope. There was hope left in this twisted, terrible and morbid world. There was hope.

He smiled back. Then I got a brilliant idea.

I got up on one leg and carefully dragged Jongdae over to one side of the bed, so that there was enough space for me to sit beside him. I hopped on one leg to the other side and lifted myself onto the bed, beside him, leaning against the frame of the head of the bed.

“It’s okay for me to do this, right?” I asked him.

He nodded happily. He looked like even if a rocket came and blew up half the world, he’d still be happy. Actually, probably not. Actually, definitely not. But none of that mattered, because a rocket hadn’t come and blown up half the world.

I leaned my head against his shoulder, giving him a glance to make sure it was okay. He nodded.

“How are your ribs doing?” I asked him.

“Healing. Baekhyun texted to me about how you forgot that you had a fractured rib and a broken leg… you need to be more careful, you know. At this rate, you’ll heal slower than me,” he teased.

“I know, I know,” I laughed.

I realized that the others had finally settled down and were bursting with questions.

“Does that mean… does that mean that you might be able to walk again?” Sehun asked, eyes shining with happiness.

“Well, the percentage is certainly higher, as I won’t be completely paralyzed waist below, right?” Jongdae grinned.

They nodded eagerly.

Tao, and surprisingly, Kai, were the ones who were crying.

“Hyung, I thought that you’d never be able to walk again,” Tao blubbered.

Junmyeon hugged him, comforting him. I smiled. Umma Suho protecting Baby Tao. Quite fitting for his nickname, Suho. Suho meaning protect. I wondered what Junmyeon’s power was. Nothing destructive for sure, Junmyeon was anything but destructive. Well… when he was angry…

Kai on the other hand, was crying in awful gasps of air, and I couldn’t help but feel like I was seeing another part of him, one that he didn’t really like anyone see. Everyone else was too busy cheering and chattering away with each other; he was all alone.

“Come here, Kai,” I said.

He came over, almost tripping on my deserted crutches that were laid carelessly on the ground from where I had left them. I winced, taking a note to self to put my crutches to the side properly next time so no one would get hurt by tripping over them.

I held my arms out, towards him. He looked at me questioningly, still gasping little gasps of air with tears rolling down his cheeks, but seemed to realize that I wanted to give him a hug.

I got up from the bed, balancing on one leg.

He rushed forward, clutching at me, and letting those ugly sobs and gasps of air stop as he just started crying full on. I put my arms around him, and in that moment, I felt almost like a mother. Although Kai always tried to act tough, he was still a young boy, just like the rest.

After his sobs died down, he pulled away, looking a little bit ashamed.

“Sorry,” he croaked out, looking away.

I pulled his chin down so that he was looking at me. “Why are you saying sorry? There’s nothing to be sorry about, Kim Jongin. Nothing. A man shouldn’t be ashamed to cry. Be proud. Be proud, Kim Jongin.”

With that, I climbed back onto the bed beside Jongdae, pulling the blanket over us so that it came all the way up to our shoulders, grinning at him. I leaned my head against his shoulder once more, and found his hand from underneath the blanket, squeezing it.

“I’m so glad,” I whispered to him.

He nodded, and I could see the tears welling in his eyes. The tears that he’d wanted to cry when he realized what a predicament he was in. The tears of fright when he realized he might never walk again. And now, the tears of happiness.

I turned away and looked at Kai, smiling at him softly.

Jongdae closed his eyes, leaning his head against the frame of the head of the bed. A tear rolled down his cheek, but no one said anything.

I closed my eyes too, before holding my other hand out for Kai. I heard him pulling a chair beside the bed, and felt him taking my hand.

I smiled. I was so grateful to have these boys by my side.

I felt someone shaking my shoulder. I wearily opened my eyes and winced at the bright light.

“We have to leave,” Baekhyun whispered.

I turned to see Jongdae. He was still asleep, sleeping like an angel, though someone had shifted the two of us so we were no longer leaning against the frame of the head of the bed, and instead lying on the bed. While his hand was still in mine, fingers interlocked tightly, my other hand was empty.

“Where did Kai go?” I asked.

“He left earlier, Taemin came and said that they needed to practice their dance choreography or something, and he left. He didn’t want to, though,” Baekhyun reassured. “The others left a bit earlier, but I wanted to let you sleep some more so I stayed and told them I’d wake you up and bring you back to school when the time was right.”

“Thanks, oppa.” I smiled at him.

I carefully let go of Jongdae’s hand, and got off the bed, careful not to disturb him in any way.

I grabbed my bag and got a sticky note and a pen from it. Uncapping the pen, I scribbled a message on it:

Had fun today. Glad you’re going to get better.

Get better. Your will is stronger than your body.

If you believe it, you will be able to do it.

If there was anyone in the world who could will themselves to heal, it’d be you.

Sleep well,

Jooeun

I stuck it onto the side of his face carefully, grinning at the look of it, and put the pen and other sticky notes back into my bag. Then, I hopped to get my crutches.

“Want a piggy back ride today?” Baekhyun asked, grinning.

“Why not? That is, if you’re strong enough to lift me.”

We’d discovered earlier that piggy back rides didn’t really affect my health, as long as they carried me carefully and properly, so the boys used this to their advantage and tried to piggy back me whenever they wanted to.

“I’M STRONG! Besides, you’re tiny, so you’re as light as a feather,” he teased.

“I am not tiny! You’re like 10cm taller than me, don’t talk!” I exclaimed.

“10cm is a lot, you know. And it’s not 10, its 15! Anyway, are you going to get on, or what?” Baekhyun crouched down for me, so that I could get on.

I got on, wrapping my legs around his torso, and looping my arms around his neck, holding the crutches horizontally as not to stab him and not to block his sight.

“Let’s go,” Baekhyun said, grinning.

We were lucky the hospital was a five minute walk from SM Academy.

He walked and walked and walked, and I could tell that he was getting tired. Boys and acting tough. I was reminded of the first time I had met Chanyeol, when I had first come to SM Academy. Him carrying my suitcase and saying that he could handle it, even though it was obvious that he was tired from the heavy weight. I smiled at the memory.

“Do you want me to walk now?” I asked.

“No, it’s fine! I’m strong!” he protested.

“It doesn’t matter! I can walk!” I complained.

He whipped his head around to stare at me. I swallowed. Our faces were literally centimetres away.

“I can do it,” he said with a firm expression.

His eyes flickered to my lips, and I saw his Adam’s apple bob up and down as he swallowed too. He turned away, facing the front again, and I could have sworn I saw him his lips.

“I’m a man. Besides, you’re light.”

I could see the school finally coming into view.

I rested my chin on his shoulder, smiling at him when he glanced at me out of the corner of his eyes. I could feel some of his hair rubbing against my cheek. I closed my eyes, and although I had slept for awhile just moments ago, I could feel slumber welcoming me once again.

After that, all I could remember was someone placing me gently onto my bed, taking the crutches out of my hands, and someone covering me with a blanket. And perhaps… was that a kiss on my forehead I felt?

A/N: Comment, upvote, do all the awesome things :)

Hope you liked this chapter (so much fluff) (so much feels) (asldkfjdklasjf)!!

~Jinny out