Myungsoo was the second youngest in Infinite, and that automatically gave him some privileges. It meant that he wasn’t the maknae, and hence didn’t have to deal with the compulsory teasing that followed the title. But he still received the same special treatment that the maknae received; extra helpings at foodtime, able to go straight to bed without being briefed by the manager and a tendency to escape their leader’s harsher scolding.

Not that Sunggyu got angry very often - only a handful of times actually. Myungsoo remembered the interview where they’d all pointed at Sunggyu as the scariest when angry. It was true. Sunggyu’s eyes full of disappointment and icy rage, armed with words that cut straight to Myungsoo’s heart...Myungsoo always hid behind Sungyeol when Sunggyu got like that. Truly, Myungsoo had never seen anyone scarier.

He didn’t expect to change his mind in the middle of the backstage of a variety show.

Woohyun charged straight at Tayson, his mouth set in a snarl and his eyes looking like those of a wild beast hunting a prey. Myungsoo could barely recognise his hyung who usually smiled so dorkily at the fans, who had never showed him an angry face, who had the warmest hugs in Infinite. Myungsoo watched Woohyun powerpunched Tayson, sending the taller boy flying back, and couldn’t help his gasp of horror.

“Hyung!” Myungsoo screamed so loudly that his throat burned. “Stop it!”

But Tayson was already up, swinging a blow at Woohyun which caught at his side and sent both of them to the ground. They started wrestling viciously, aiming blows that caught at each other’s faces, stomachs – wherever they could reach.  Woohyun was at a disadvantage with his smaller size but he fought with a fierceness that made up for it.

“You shut your mouth, you monster!” Woohyun roared, blood streaming from his cut lip.

“The only monster here is that on your team,” Tayson screamed back and flipped them so that Woohyun was on the bottom.

“You bastard!”

On Woohyun’s other side, Hoya was grabbling with Junho – though Junho was clearly winning. Hoya doubled over as he was punched in the stomach before being slammed into the nearby wall. He seemed to be refusing to fight back, probably regretting his punch at Junho the moment he actually did it. Hoya had never been violent in nature.

“Hyung!” Myungsoo’s voice cracked as he rushed forward with Sungyeol, trying to separate Hoya from Junho. Sungyeol grunted as he was elbowed by Junho but they managed to get between the two boys. Hoya panted painfully, clutching at his abdomen.

“What’s going on?” Sunggyu’s voice made Myungsoo’s head jerk up. He and Dongwoo were staring at the ruckus with pure horror on their faces. “Woohyun!”

Sunggyu and Dongwoo leapt forward to grab Woohyun, their paths prevented by the idols clustered around, doing absolutely nothing. Sunggyu had just reached Woohyun when the main vocal managed to get on top of Tayson and land another sound punch onto the side of his head.

It was just that moment that all the managers and staff decided to come.

Myungsoo felt as though he was going to throw up and tremors flitted through his body. Drowsiness filled his head to see blood dripping down Woohyun and Hoya’s faces. His vision seemed to grow brighter and brighter by each passing second. His eyelids grew heavy and closed.

 In the one second it took for him to close his eyes, he saw Sunggyu pull Woohyun off Tayson and deliver a hard slap across Woohyun’s face before yelling in a tone of absolute fear and anger “Pull yourself together!”. He saw Beast’s and Hunter’s managers pull their idols closer to them, screaming bloody murder about the blood crusting their faces. He saw Tayson and Junho, and their teammates pointing fingers at Woohyun and Hoya, more and more fingers until it looked like all the fingers pointed towards Infinite.

Myungsoo closed his eyes and the darkness was a welcome.

He woke up to Sungjong’s face hovering above his, and Sungjong’s hands gently patting his hair. The maknae had been crying again – going by the blotchy face and red eyes - and really Myungsoo thought, it felt like Sungjong had cried more the past week than the past seven years he’s known him.

“Jongie?” he whispered.

Sungjong tried to smile. “You fainted for a few minutes.”

That explained why he was lying on the hard bench in the middle of the corridor, Myungsoo supposed. He sat up shakily, the snakes in his stomach twisting more to hear raised voices coming from nearby.

“You’re scum!” It was Jungsu’s voice, Myungsoo realised. The manager who had led Sunggyu to the SM CEO must be managing Hunter as well as EXO. “How dare you hit a new group’s leader?”

The corridor had emptied except for a group of people nearby. Jungsu and a few other SM managers stood at one side, with 2PM’s managers standing beside them. Tayson and Junho also stood with them, new makeup covering their bruises. Opposite the gang, were Sunggyu, Woohyun and Hoya, with Geonam and Youngjun standing behind them with their heads bowed.

Myungsoo’s fingers curled into fists to see the plaster on Woohyun’s lip and Hoya’s eyebrow. He had no doubt that his hyungs were far more injured that Tayson and Junho but new makeup already covered their bruises too.

“Throwing punches like school bullies,” 2PM’s manager had his lip curled in disgust. “You brats. We should report you to the police.”

Woohyun raised his head and Myungsoo saw that his eyes had still not lost its wild edge. “He said – “

“I don’t care what Junho said!” 2PM’s manager roared. “You still behave like an idol!”

Woohyun glared. “Then tell him to behave like an idol first!”

“You dare talk back?” Jungsu cried out and stalked forward. “You just assaulted two innocent boys!” He gestured at the rest of Infinite, “And the rest of you did nothing to help.”

Woohyun’s face twisted into a terrible anger that caused Myungsoo to shrink back. Even Hoya raised his head to glare daggers at the SM manager. And Myungsoo knew they were all remembering when Jungsu had stood by as SM’s CEO assaulted Sunggyu.

“We full heartedly apologise,” Sunggyu said hurriedly, pulling Woohyun and Hoya behind him. He bowed 90 degrees fully and repeatedly. “Please forgive their actions. Let us move on from this situation.”

Jungsu snorted disdainfully. “What’s to stop us from going to the police?”

Myungsoo stiffened, his heart hammering in his chest. No...they couldn’t...

Sunggyu raised himself to his full height. “Both sides participated fully in the fight, Woohyun and Hoya’s injuries prove that. You can’t convict them alone if you went to the police...hyungnim.”

“We were just defending ourselves,” said Junho.

“Yes! Those animals attacked us first!” Tayson cried out, moving forward past Jungsu. He glared straight at Woohyun.

Woohyun started forward, a growl escaping his lips, “How dare you use banmal towards a sunbaenim, you brat – “

Sunggyu gripped Woohyun’s hand and Woohyun visibly held himself back. Sunggyu looked at Junho and Tayson, and bowed his head.

“I beg of you. Let us forget about this and move on. Lessons can be learned today.”

Junho raised an eyebrow. “Apologise to us, then. Fully.” He received mutterings of approval from his manager and Jungsu.

Sunggyu bent his knees and Myungsoo realised with dawning horror that his oldest hyung was about to beg on his knees. He jerked forward, as did Sungjong, Dongwoo and Sungyeol, but Woohyun and Hoya had already grabbed Sunggyu’s arms and pulled him back.

“Hyung, what are you doing?” Woohyun asked in a thick voice suddenly full of tears. He and Hoya simultaneously got on their knees instead and laid the top halves of their bodies prostrate on the ground.

“We apologise for our wrongdoings,” Woohyun said clearly. “Please forgive us.”

Myungsoo didn’t hear the exchange that followed the apology. All he could see was how close Junho and Tayson’s feet were to Woohyun and Hoya’s heads, and little sobs took over him. He curled up on the bench with only Sungjong beside him, patting him on the back gently. Through the haze of his tears, he saw the angry idols’ managers leave.

The problem was over then.

But why did Myungsoo feel as though his heart was breaking?

The variety show’s stage was similar “Quiz to change the world” with Kim Gura, Hyungdon and Park Myungsoo sat on the panel while each idol group had their own space to sit. Myungsoo gritted his teeth to see that three of Infinite would need to stand seeing as they’d only been allocated four chairs. Myungsoo, Sungyeol and Sungjong chose to stand behind the other members. A huge screen was behind the panel, allowing the crowd to see close ups of the idols’ faces if the camera zooms in.

Some jeers came from the crowd in front of the panel. Myungsoo ignored it, choosing to try and catch his favourite Weekly Idol’s MC’s eye. But Hyungdon seemed to be purposefully looking away from Infinite.

The show started off with some banter as usual but almost instantly, the questions were directed towards Infinite.

“So, Infinite,” Gura said in a carefully nonchalant voice, “there was some news released recently about your maknae.”

“Honestly, I’ve got something to say about this,” Sunggyu said, raising his hand.

“Please do.” Gura’s grin resembled a shark and Myungsoo could only wonder how Sunggyu could remain looking as he normally did on variety shows - with his eyes purposefully wide and childlike.

“Honestly,” Sunggyu started, “I don’t see why everyone is getting so upset about this.”

“Ehhh – what do you mean you don’t understand?” Park Myungsoo said incredulously. “Your team member’s been proven to be gay. He’s brought shame to your group, and not just your group, but to all who represent Korea’s entertainment industry.”

Myungsoo sensed rather than felt all the members stiffen. Next to him, Sungjong stood still, his face eerily blank but Myungsoo could see the fear and internalised disgust in his eyes. Subtly, he slipped his hand into Sungjong’s and gave it a comforting squeeze.

Sunggyu laughed. “Hyung, this isn’t a Mulan movie. Sungjong hasn’t brought dishonour to anyone. He’s just been himself, and complying with the idol rules, he hasn’t been dating anyone since he joined Woolim.”

An incredulous silence greeted his statement. Many on the panel, including Hyungdon and Park Myungsoo, looked perplexed at Sunggyu’s frankness. But Myungsoo could sense the rising hostility emitting from the other idols and felt his stomach turn to see Gura’s clenched fists as he stared at Sunggyu with narrowed eyes.

Zico almost timidly raised his hand. “If we’re all being honest, can I join in?”

“Of course,” Gura switched to a warm smile as he faced the Block B member.

“I feel like I speak on behalf of a lot of my fellow idols,” said Zico morosely. “We all genuinely feel uncomfortable with Sungjong being around us now. As male idols especially, we usually exposed a lot to each other because we feel safe in each other’s company. You know, we show each other things that we’d never show the female idols. Now, I’ve shared changing rooms with Sungjong before, and...you know...”

“Ah, you feel as though he might have been looking at you?” Gura interjected, exaggerating his face to look sympathetic towards Zico.

Myungsoo wondered if the anger virus had infected Infinite, because ire rose within him so sharply, he opened his mouth without thinking.

“Zico, you’re really not his type.” He smirked at Zico, trying to pass it off as a light-hearted comment. “After all, our maknae only goes for the best.”

No one laughed, everyone looking shocked at what he’d said. Even Sungyeol was staring at him with his mouth open. Zico looked completely taken aback. Myungsoo had always been the one to keep his mouth shut in variety shows. But he was Sungjong’s hyung too. And that meant that it was also up to him to protect Sungjong.

Too late Myungsoo remembered Sunggyu’s instructions “Don’t speak at all. Just let me speak”. He gulped as he saw Gura’s eyebrows come together into a stern scowl.

“Are you trying to imply that Zico-goon is less than the best, Myungsoo-goon?”

Myungsoo swallowed nervously, feeling his hands start to clam up. His honest answer was “yes, Sungjong absolutely deserved someone who was 100% perfect”, but how was he supposed to phrase that without offending. Even Sunggyu was opening and closing his mouth, a look of alarm flashing across his features.

“Aigooo,” Dongwoo’s laugh didn’t reach anywhere near his usual brightness, “of course Zico is one of the best! But what to do – our maknae is always so picky! Right Sungyeol-ah?”

Sungyeol rolled his eyes exaggeratedly. “Of course. It seriously drives me crazy! I ask him if he’d like some oranges and he refuses, saying they’re not the best type! I ask him if he’d like to borrow my jumper but he says the material is not good enough for his skin! See how picky he is!”

It didn’t draw any laughs but it cleared the tense atmosphere Myungsoo had set. Myungsoo cursed himself for talking but felt better at the reassuring smile Sungyeol flashed him.

Hyungdon touched his earpiece briefly. He hesitated before asking, “And what exactly is your ideal type, Sungjong?”

Myungsoo scowled at the man, feeling oddly betrayed. Hyungdon knew that Sungjong couldn’t answer the question without turning more people against him.

“Hyung why do you ask?” Sunggyu said teasingly, though there was a hint of steel in his voice. “Hyung you’re far too old for Jongie!”

The crowd found it funny, even if no one on the stage did, and the laughter it drew seemed to spur Infinite on.

“Anyway, Jongie can’t date anyone!” Woohyun declared, jokingly raising his fist. “Not with his six hyungs here!”

“Yeah!” Sungyeol looked directly at the camera and did a mock kung fu move with his fists. “Whoever’s interested will have to go through me first.”

“And an interview in a dark room with only a hanging light,” Hoya added.

The crowd roared with laughter, and Myungsoo thought he could see a slightly, shy smile playing around Sungjong’s lips.From Super Junior’s corner, Myungsoo caught Heechul’s eye and startled to see the older idol’s sly thumbs up.

Gura looked faintly disgusted while Hyungdon was staring at Sunggyu with wounded eyes - though Myungsoo couldn’t understand how he managed to feel as though he’d the one who’d been betrayed.

“Back to Zico’s concern, which I think we can all agree – is a valid one,” Gura spoke. “Do any other idols have something to say about it?”

Tayson raised his hand. “Yes, hyungnim. It’s just...I’m actually worried for Infinite sunbaenim. If Sungjong’s been gay all this time...the number of times he must have admired their bodies without their consent...”

Sungjong gripped Myungsoo’s hand back so tightly that it hurt, but Myungsoo clenched his teeth and bore it. It was questions like these which he knew were ripping Sungjong up from the inside. He glared at Tayson, biting the side of his cheek to keep from speaking.

“Tayson-ah,” Sunggyu smiled but his voice had gone dangerously soft, “do you sometimes admire your sister’s body without her consent?”

 “You go too far, Kim Sunggyu.” Gura slammed his hand down on the table and stood up before stalking forward.

Sunggyu flinched, causing Myungsoo’s breath to hitch. He hunched forward slightly over the older boy, noting the other members had automatically leaned closer to Sunggyu too. Myungsoo caught a glimpse of themselves in the tv screen hanging overhead and the fear and wariness ingrained on their faces shocked him.

But there was no way they were letting anyone touch their leader again. The fingermarks around Sunggyu’s neck still hadn’t faded.

Gura slowly sat back down urged by Hyungdon’s hand at his elbow.

“No hyungnim,” Sunggyu said with a respectful incline of his head. “It’s not me who’s gone too far. Sungjong is a brother to us – we’ve always said this – and implying that he’s nothing but a ert in the group – that is what’s gone too far.”

“He’s gay – “ Park Myungsoo tried to interrupt.

 “He’s gay. But he has never carelessly raised his hand to a woman,” Sunggyu replied smoothly, and Park Myungsoo coloured at the reminder of his previous scandal. “ – or indeed a man. He has never made someone to cry. He has never used cruel words. He has never drank alcohol and driven past his limits. He has never had to apologise at all for his misbehaviour because he’s simply never misbehaved. He’s remained just as he always has. Kind. Hardworking. Talented.”

Each word seemed to cut into everyone on the stage but even as glares of daggers were aimed in Infinite’s direction, Myungsoo saw certain people guilty of the crimes Sunggyu stated stir uncomfortably in their seats. And the crowd seemed less sure of Sungjong’s guilt, confused frowns marring their faces instead.

Gura pretended to busy himself with his placards and turned to Super Junior instead, before questioning them on their latest album. Myungsoo clenched his hands, realising that Gura had subtly done nothing to promote their album. He was confused about the looks of relief and satisfaction on his own members’ faces but when he tried to furrow his eyebrows at Hoya, he received only a small smile in reply.

The segment seemed to take forever to finish and Myungsoo found himself gritting his teeth as the no further attention was paid to Infinite. It was a live show so no amount of editing would be helping to contribute to their screentime. Myungsoo sighed slightly as Hunters showed off their new dance, Shinee played games with Super Junior, and Block B and BTOB bantered with each other. He couldn’t help the twist of jealousy in his stomach as he watched the other idols do their y dances, aegyo battles...Infinite could do all of these. They could bring more laughter than any of the other groups with the variety skills, Myungsoo was sure. How could they not be given the chance?

There’s still Weekly Idol, Myungsoo told himself, still Weekly Idol...

The show finally came to an end and no one walked close to Infinite as they made their way out of the show’s stage. Myungsoo could hear Gura talking loudly with the show’s PD, gesturing towards their backs angrily, but thankfully, Gura didn’t approach them.

Sungjong looked completely crestfallen at the turn of events. His shoulders were hunched and though he had his head held high, there was no mistaking the pain in his eyes each time he saw Woohyun’s bloodied mouth or Hoya’s darkening eye.

Sunggyu ordered for all of them to go to the car immediately and Myungsoo hastened to follow. He didn’t want to be in the backstage corridor when the other idols came out after getting changed. The disgust in their eyes would drive him crazy. They packed all their bags and the managers began guiding them out.

“Myungsoo-ah.” Sunggyu took hold of his elbow, preventing him from following the rest of the group. “Not you. You’re coming with me.”

Myungsoo’s heart sank as thoughts of why Sunggyu wanted to be alone with him flew through his head. Was he going to get scolded for speaking out of turn? Did he do something that made things worse for the group.

Sunggyu patted his cheek. “I’m not going to scold you – though you do deserve it, you impulsive kid. It’s just that I need to meet with Hyungdon hyung and I want someone to keep me company in case Gura’s or Park Myungsoo’s there.”

Myungsoo recoiled internally. He didn’t like conflict, and conflict is certainly what he’ll get if they bump into Gura or Park Myungsoo. But how could he refuse his leader? Especially since it seemed like Sunggyu still bore the mental scars from his encounter with SM’s CEO.

“Of course, hyung,” Myungsoo forced a smile.

They walked through the corridors together, Myungsoo trying not to look at another human being at all. He couldn’t stand the looks he was being given anymore. It made him sick.

“Hyung,” Myungsoo asked, “why me? Why not one of the others to follow you?”

“Woohyun and Hoya shouldn’t hang around after their fight today,” said Sunggyu with a small shrug, “and Sungjong needs to stay away from people like Gura as much as possible. Dongwoo and Sungyeol are too emotionally orientated and I want to avoid another commotion. Which leaves you. My trusty dongsaeng.”

Sunggyu smiled at him, but as was increasingly common these days, it was a fake smile that didn’t hide the stress in the leader’s face.

Myungsoo changed the topic. “Hyung why do you all look quite happy with the show today? We barely got any screentime!”

“It’s a live show, Myungsoo. Gura and his panel were hoping to rip into us so that all the people watching could see us degrade ourselves terribly. But we stood firm, we held up, and we sent an important message. That Sungjong hasn’t done anything wrong and that Infinite stands together.”

Sunggyu’s smile this time was genuine and Myungsoo found it hard not to smile back with the warmth in our chest.

“We might just get back some of our fans by doing that,” said Myungsoo. Sunggyu hummed in reply before pausing in front of the dressing room door of the talkshow’s hosts. He knocked before entering, pulling Myungsoo in with him.

To Myungsoo’s dismay, Gura and Park Myungsoo were already there with Hyungdon, who hurriedly came to greet them at the door.

“Hyung,” Sunggyu bowed his full 90 degrees bow and Myungsoo followed suit, despite his annoyance at the man still simmering.

“Sunggyu –ah,” Hyungdon said in a lowered voice. “Why are there marks around your neck?”

Myungsoo felt a flicker of surprise but realised the marks must have shown when Sunggyu bowed.

“Ah hyung, never mind that,” Sunggyu smiled playfully, “what did you want to talk about?”

Hyungdon raked a hand through his hair. “It’s just that, Sunggyu –ah. This is a bad situation we’re in. And there’s not much I can do. Not much Deffcon can do either. Our hands are tied and actually, I can completely understand where the show’s producer is coming from...”

Sunggyu had completely stiffened. “Hyung...what do you mean?”

Hyungdon refused to meet Sunggyu’s eyes. “Sunggyu-yah...maybe it’s for the best right now...but we’re going to have to cancel your Weekly Idol appearance.”

Myungsoo felt as though he’d been slapped in the face and it took him a few seconds to realised why. Weekly Idol had always been their home. It was where they felt completely comfortable to be themselves, and it was where the fans loved seeing them too. It was almost like a tradition – each time Infinite comes back, they go on Weekly Idol.

And Myungsoo knew the show’s PD, the show’s staff – everyone! And they’d always treated Infinite with so much warmth and affections. For the show not to want Infinite to guest on...

“Why hyung?” Sunggyu asked shakily. “If this is about Sungjong – “

“Of course it’s about Sungjong!” Hyungdon yelled. “Sunggyu-ah, why is he still on the team? Can’t you see he’s pulling you down?”

Sunggyu swallowed hard and he said in a wavering voice. “Hyung, I really thought you’d be different.”

Hyungdon sighed again and stepped forward with his arms outstretched. He seemed to be attempting a hug but Sunggyu moved back and when he lifted his head again, his face had hardened.

“Sungjong is part of Infinite, and if your homophobia stops you from accepting that, then that’s your problem.”

Myungsoo thought that it might have been the first time he’d ever heard Sunggyu speak informally to a senior, especially to Hyungdon who Sunggyu had always liked. Concern flared through Myungsoo. Sunggyu hadn’t wanted Dongwoo and Sungyeol because they were too emotional, but it looked like Hyungdon’s news had stretched Sunggyu past his limits.

Gura laughed mockingly from the back of the dressing room. “Yah! See how he reveals his true colours when you don’t give him what you want! All that politeness was just an act. What else do you expect from someone still supporting a in the team?”

Sunggyu’s face was slowly turning red and his mouth twisted as he said, “I am polite to those who deserve my respect! And don’t you refer to Sungjong with that word!”

Park Myungsoo spat on the ground before striding forward towards Sunggyu. “How dare you speak to your hyungnim like that, you brat?”

He raised his arm to strike but Myungsoo found his feet moving before his brain processed what was going on. And when the slap landed squarely on Myungsoo’s own cheek, he found that the sharp pain only slightly tempered his relief at making sure his leader didn’t get hurt.

Hyungdon looked to be in complete shock that Park Myungsoo had struck out, while the man himself was staring at Myungsoo with something close to puzzlement in his eyes.

“Myungsoo ah,” Sunggyu whispered, horrified.

Myungsoo knew that it was only a matter of time before Sunggyu exploded at Park Myungsoo. He had to act quickly before things got worse.

“I’m fine, hyung,” Myungsoo replied quietly before flashing the full effect of his trademark glare at the three men in front of him. “Please forgive my hyung. He’s been under a lot of stress recently. But if you try to hit any of my hyungs or Sungjong in the future, I’ll report you to the police for abuse.”

And with that, Myungsoo encircled Sunggyu’s hand and led his dazed leader out of the room, making their way back to the car parked at the back. He could feel Sunggyu growing more upset and anxious with each step, probably blaming himself for his outburst and for the red mark on Myungsoo’s cheek.

But despite the stinging, Myungsoo felt good. He had protected his leader and was doing his best to protect their team too. Let life throw its challenges, Myungsoo vowed, as long as they were together, Infinite could overcome anything.

Comments are my life's blood so please comment!!! =) Truly thank you to all sharing their thoughts so far!

Next chapter: Dongwoo ~ what to do when the sun is always hidden by the clouds?