How to Love Again

Note: Just for Context please watch this MV first: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERlf_9BW4iA

Chapter I: To See Her Familiar Face Again

It has been 5 years since her death. He was still in despair after not being able to find her on time. When he found the church where she was supposed to be staying he was already too late. He was only left with her death portrait, a scarf which she had made for him and a letter.  

That letter that he has always kept in his pocket a long with a picture of them together.  It’s her death anniversary and he’s once again standing on the same beach front where her ashes were spread.  Five years, he could not believe that her death had been that long ago and yet he remembers it like it had happened yesterday. He buried his face in his hands. He was getting by with his work in the motor shop as a mechanic and some random part time work given to him by friends but to say that he was living a normal life may sound too good to be true. If anyone would ask him he would rather be dead but Dara’s letter told him to specifically move on and try to find happiness. He laughed at himself. How can he be happy when she’s already gone?

The sun was almost setting and he would probably have to head back to the city.

 “Unnie! I’m finally here! I’m your dongseng, Sandy,”

His reverie was disturbed by some random yelling from a distance.

“I’m sorry I came here too late. I really wanted to meet you. I thought that if I came back here I would finally meet you. I’m sorry I was too late.”

Seung Hyun felt sorry for whoever that person was. She too was too late. He felt bad for her because he knew exactly how it feels like.

“Dara-unnie mianhe…”

The last thing he heard made him stop from walking away. He didn’t know if his mind was playing tricks on him but he clearly heard the girl crying from a distance mention Dara’s name.

It was almost dark only a few hints of sunlight lit the sky and made it look like a beautiful mix of orange and purple. He went to the direction of the voice. He was curious to say the least but wasn’t really expecting anything. It was probably pure coincidence.

He walked towards the direction of the sobbing.  The crying sounded so disturbingly familiar. It sounded so uncannily like Dara, his Dara.

 He moved closer and closer and saw a petite figure standing close to the shoreline.

“Excuse me miss are you okay?” Even to him it sounded like a stupid question because clearly she was crying and that meant she wasn’t okay but he didn’t exactly know what to say. He approached her and was almost at arm’s length when the girl suddenly turned to face him.

“Obviously I’m not okay. Who the hell are you anyway?”

He stood frozen as she stared at that familiar face. How could she be seeing her now? Alive and well. He run towards her and hugged her like his life depended on it.

“Hey! Let me go. Get off of me,” she screamed and tried to push him away.

“Dara it’s me, Seung Hyun. Don’t you remember,” he told her as he looked at her all so familiar face.

“I’m not Dara. My name is Sandy. Will you get off of me,” she retorted and finally pushed him away.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

He still could not believe his eyes. She looks exactly like Dara only she had light brown hair instead of Dara’s Jet black one.

“So are you saying you know my sister?” The girl who sat in front of him asked in between biting her skewered fishcake.

“Yes, she was my girlfriend,” he admitted. “I’m sorry about what happened at the beach. It’s just that…”

“I look exactly like Dara-unni,” she interrupted. “You’re not the first one to tell me that. Sister Agnes said I look exactly like my sister. But we’re identical twins thus the uncanny resemblance. She’s older by 10 minutes from what I was told. And don’t sweat it. I got over the initial shock after you told me who you are.”

“But she never told me she had a sister,” Seung Hyun muttered. Truth be told he was still confused.

“She probably didn’t know. I actually found out just recently when I found a letter from Sister Agnes that she sent to my adoptive parents. It was a letter about my sister being sick. I found it 6 years too late. I confronted my mom and dad of course and they finally told me that I have a sister. They told me early on that I was adopted and that I was the daughter of their good friend. They just didn’t think it was necessary for me to know about my twin sister.”

“So you came back here to meet her?” He took a shot of Soju while he waited for her reply. It felt weird staring at Dara only she wasn’t. Even her voice sounded similar.

“Of course I wanted to meet her. The funny thing is our real mom gave us the same name. My adoptive parents kept my original name as my real mom requested. It turns out that my older sister’s name was Sandara too. I guess she wanted to make it easy for us to find each other. I was actually given away because my sister was quite sickly when we were babies. My real mom was an unwed mother and was disowned by her parents. She died I few years after I was adopted and my sister practically grew up in the orphanage. I guess despite the fact that I was given away. I was actually the twin that has a better life. “

“Dara was a very happy person too. She smiled a lot and liked helping people. She wanted to be volunteer social worker,” he told her.

“Where did you meet my sister?”  It w