Word Count: 3862

The holidays are that time of year when people are expected to celebrate it surrounded with happiness and love. Christmas is that time of year when the sounds of Christmas carols, giving of gifts, parties left and right, and a heartwarming atmosphere around. New Years is equally the same with the much awaited fireworks, the reckless making of sounds or any other beliefs practiced to ward of bad luck and welcome good luck for the coming New Year. However, growing up in a small shanty in a messy shantytown with barely any money to spend on, the holidays for Byun Baekhyun was just like any other ordinary uneventful day.

Of course, there were a few little changes; curtesy of his lovely grandmother that made sure her grandson enjoyed it at least with a little feast on the night of Christmas Eve. She would spend a little more on these days, buying foods that were a little pricier than their usual. She would by a whole chicken – frying them as the main dish; a set of pasta ingredients – Baekhyun’s favorite, and a few varieties of fruits – few meaning two apples, two oranges, and a hand of bananas; the only foods they can afford more than the usual. That was Baekhyun’s delicious Christmas feast. He never complained too; not only is his grand mamma’s company enough for him already, but that was how he grew up celebrating Christmas and therefore believed that was exactly how it was celebrated – by not only him, but other people as well. He never stayed up late during these days either. There was not much to do anyway so sleep was the only other option; unless he wanted to go out the streets and spend it with strangers which were unlikely.

When his mother was still around, it was also during these days when Baekhyun wouldn’t see a glimpse of her for a long period of time. She would either come home very late or leave very early in the morning or not at all come home for days. He never questioned it even though he had always wondered. He did ask his grandmother a few times but the answer he was always given was ‘she’s just working very hard dear Baekhyunnie.’ So in the end, he just brushes it all off – mama is working hard even in the holidays just for me.

It was only after she left that he learned the real reason behind it. It was true, that she was indeed working very hard. But it wasn’t necessarily true that it was for the benefit of her son, more for the benefit of herself. She would leave to spend Christmases with her friends or a man she was together with at that time – mingling with the rich and wealthy to hopefully snag one one day. A sort of ‘hero’ to get her out of the filthy dirty small shanty they live in; completely forgetting the importance of her family.. of Baekhyun, her son.

It left a bitter taste in his mouth; the memory was both painful and regretful. Painful because his mother would choose anyone but him, and regretful because it was times he wanted to spend most with her.

At the sentimental memory of the past, Baekhyun shakes his head and sighs in sadness. Trying to shoo away all sad thoughts and replace with happy ones – like the much awaited Christmas party with Team E.B., something he looked forward to ever since he received the invitation. Imagining and fantasizing scenarios of what it will be like to spend Christmas with people he adores.

The invitation currently on his hand was a simple but pretty looking hard paper decorated with a watercolor like drawing of a Christmas tree. Their envelopes seal that of a shiny gold with a seeming family crescent of symbols he does not understand in melted wax; tracing it with a finger. He eyes the drawing with proudness as it was his own very design. Junmyeon having asked him a favor of making one and to his surprise was printed on eight papers – a special invitation solely for the group themselves.

The faint sounds of voices singing a Christmas carol distract him. And as he looks out his window below, he is greeted by the sight of a group of children singing happily in front of a neighboring apartment. They don’t notice him as he watches silently as they sing lively in front of an old couple, who later gives them something in thanks and bids with a Merry Christmas greeting of their own.

It brought a smile on his face, Christmas is definitely here. He then suddenly remembers that he hasn’t decorated his apartment yet, not a hint of the Christmas spirit. At this, he rushes to his cupboard and takes out a medium sized box he had always kept. Upon opening it, he carefully pulls out a pretty golden star decoration and hangs it by the window.

As the star sways lightly through the gentle wind, Baekhyun watches it with nostalgia, an aching pain in his chest. It was the last gift his grandmother gave him before she passed away three months later. He only takes it out once a year, the only decoration he has ever had in this home of his.

“Baekhyun dear, I got you something.” Grandma weakly takes out a pretty box wrapped in pretty wrapping paper and hands it to Baekhyun.

“Oh grandma, you shouldn’t have.” Curious at the sudden giving of a gift which was a first in a long time, Baekhyun accepts it with a furrow of eyebrows. “Don’t spend on unnecessary things grandmamma. Your presence is enough for me.”

“Ah, but dear grandson, this may be the last time I might be able to.” Grandma smiles as she pats his head affectionately.

“Please don’t say things like that. Not funny.” Baekhyun frowns while he begins opening the gift. “You still have a long life with me to go through.” He adds quietly.

Upon opening the gift, Baekhyun shrieks in happiness as he holds up high the star he eyes in awe. “Grandmamma!! This is so beautiful!”

With a big smile plastered on his face, he gives his grandmother a huge hug and an affectionate kiss on the cheek. To which is responded by a laughing grandma who equally hugs him back just as tight.

The next words Grandmamma utters – caressing his hair affectionately as she did so, Baekhyun simply brushes them off and ignores as he once again goes back to admiring the beauty of the golden star. Words he never thought would mean much more later on.

“When I leave, I will become a star and I will look after you. So Baekhyun dear, when that time comes, do not ever think you are lonely. I will continue watching you proudly and happily. May you find love that you deserve; someone is out there meant to make you happy… Gain friends who will love you truly.

My dear lovely grandson, do not ever lose your smile.”

Cold wind breezes through the air and inside his apartment; the golden star swaying and shining beautifully from the reflection of the bright moonlight. As if saying ‘Baekhyun dear, grandmamma misses you’.

Due to the cold breeze that entered his room, the sounds of a fluttering paper catches his attention – his Ideal Man list. Immediately, he takes a pen and sits in front of it; reading through it again after a long time and sees if he’s able to check out more words.

Bright smile? The image of Chanyeol’s full smile appears in his head, as well as the sound of his light laughter. Definitely.

Love me? The memory of Chanyeol’s confession; the three words plus his name being said by that deep voice. Oh yes. He giggles.

Park Chanyeol? The image of his giant holding his hand out for his to take, the kisses on his cheek, the warm hugs he receives… Yes, definitely Park Chanyeol.

He disregards the rest of the unchecked words in his list. Not today.

Ideal Man

For a while he blankly stares at it then turns back to the star that hangs by his window. Filled with happiness and excitement, he smiles all throughout the night. Ending his day with a faint smile on his lips and the memory of his friends from earlier as he waits for the next day to come; the gifts he had prepared weeks ago laying by the edge of his bed, all wrapped up and ready to be given.

Grandmamma, I miss you too.

♠♠♠

With the success of the ending of the university’s festival, despite all the mishaps, the misfortunes of a few, the last minute changes; everyone ends it with an A+ on their grade. However, while everyone else is thrilled to start their holiday break, Baekhyun is busy taking down the exhibit with a few other co-exhibitors.

Usually, Baekhyun would pout while doing so. It was a tiring job and a regretful one at that. Having to finally take down what you have worked for in weeks, some even in months to only throw them away because it is now all done. This time though, Baekhyun does everything in a breeze with a smile. His mind wandering around in excited thoughts of spending the holiday break with a special someone. Besides, he gets to keep his artworks so what’s there to complain.

Busy taking down his artworks and dismantling the installations Baekhyun is startled by a tap on his shoulder.

“Can I keep this Stranger?”

He is greeted by Stranger’s pretty eye smile, smile hiding behind a facemask, as she points to one of his paintings.

“Don’t let your past define, destroy, or defeat you.

Let your past strengthen you.” --

Surprised by the sudden wish and seeing the sadness in her eyes, Baekhyun meekly nods an okay.

He doesn’t go back straight to his work but stares oddly at Stranger, the sadness reflecting in her eyes concerning him.

“Are you oka