Minseok/Hayoung, g, slice of life

set around growl & nonono promotion

Minseok wipes a hand over his face, feeling the cold droplets of water dripping down to his chin and he frowns a little when he realizes they drip onto his stage outfit. With his right hand he reaches out to grab a tissue and dabs it carefully across his sweatshirt. When he’s done he throws the wet tissue to the bin, and he’s about to walk away, but then his eyes catches his own reflection on the mirror.

He’s changed – lost a lot of weight and in result now his face is slimmer, sharp on the chin, accentuating his features even more. His mom said he’s too skinny and she’s worried, but his manager told him he looks so much better this way.

It was months of dieting, a long process Minseok despises so much and one he doesn’t want to go over ever again.

Jongdae always tried to feed him behind the managers’ back while Yixing whined when he refused. Kris squeezed his shoulder without a word and Zitao never ate in front of him. Luhan swore he would do the diet with him, accompanying him to the gym and all, but Luhan needed to eat – Minseok was the one who’s fat and ugly, Luhan had always been pretty.

Minseok doesn’t know if it’s all worth it, though. Despite the screams for him that are louder now during their first comeback, despite the increase of his fansites, despite everything, wouldn’t he still be a backdrop for the other members? Surviving in a group of 12 is a real struggle when you have no presence.

He sighs and rubs his face once again. He needs to go back to the waiting room, Junmyeon gets extra antsy when they’re not together. The company pressures him since he’s the leader, and they need to nail this comeback, or else.

Minseok is walking out of the toilet – he purposefully chose the one that’s far away from their waiting room, wanting to take a break from s as long as possible because even though he loves them sometimes it’s suffocating – when he hears quiet sobbing from the corner. He turns his head, trying to make sure whether he heard it right.

And then he hears again, a sniff you take when you try not to cry. It’s a girl.

When he approaches the sound – to a blind spot in the corner, covered by the stage props on the corridor – Minseok sees a girl sitting on a low chair, using a napkin to wipe her tears. She’s wearing a blue dress over a white lace shirt and a hat, stage outfit, Minseok thinks, so she’s also an idol who’s recording today. He thinks he saw the outfit before on a girl group, was it APink—

She looks up, startled by his appearance there, and yes, she’s an APink’s member.

Minseok recognizes her as Hayoung, the youngest of the group. He remembers, because, it’s hard not to be bitter at younger idols who get to debut before him. She debuted a year before him, when she’s only 15, a junior high school student, while Minseok still struggled to secure his position in SM’s next group.

Hayoung wipes her tears and starts to get up to greet him, but Minseok waves his hand.

“Just sit down—Are you alright?” he asks. His mind tells him that it’s not his problem, that it’s best if he just go, but his consciousness won’t let him be. Maybe because she’s so young, younger than Sehun, maybe because he remembers his own sister and maybe because he’s an older brother, his first instinct is to solve troubles.

For a very brief moment Hayoung looks lost, but like something she’s already practiced and mastered, she smiles widely. “Ah, no. It’s nothing. Just… dust. In my eyes.”

Company’s training.

Minseok stares at the girl, and she’s still smiling like everything’s okay even though her eyes are red.

He takes a seat next to her, inhales, and says quietly. “… You know… Sometimes it’s better to let it go. Telling someone else can help to make it better.”

How awkward it must be, hearing that for a stranger – does she even know who he is? He hasn’t promoting in the country, he doesn’t think they’ve ever meet before, and she’s a sunbae. She probably knows EXO, yeah, probably EXO-K too, but EXO-M? Moreover, EXO-M’s Xiumin?

Minseok half expects Hayoung to brush him off for the second time, but what he sees is a smile that’s fading after his words.

Hayoung looks back down to her lap – she’s holding the napkin tightly on her fists.

“… We…,” she starts to talk, voice soft, trembling a little, “… We comeback after more than a year…”

Minseok nods to encourage her talking.

“Our members… One of our members. She left. During our hiatus. The boss…” Hayoung takes a pause to swallow, holding back her tears and doesn’t continue her sentence. Minseok doesn’t know about it, but he can conclude it from Hayoung’s reaction. Seems like their company let one of the members go.

“We’re getting good reaction this comeback… And I don’t know if it’s a good thing or not.” Hayoung chokes on her word and she starts to sob again, quickly wiping the tears away before they fall down on her cheeks.

Seeing the girl in front of him cries, the thought just comes to Minseok – would he feel the same if one of the members leave? Would he feel sad? Or would he think of it as an opportunity to get the spotlight? … Is it petty of him to think like that?

He only debuted a year ago – when did he start to feel so… jaded?

While this girl...

Minseok feels like a sinner compared to her; so pure, so kind.

“… You’re a good girl,” Minseok says, hand automatically goes up to pat her on the head. She glances, surprised with his action. Minseok forgot that they’re strangers, that she’s not his dongsaeng, not his little sister. He takes his hand back. “Anyway… If you get good response, I think you’re deserved to be happy. You work hard for it, don’t you? You’re allowed to be happy. And you can be sad about your member at the same time. This and that… They’re two different things, don’t link them together. … Alright?”

Hayoung is quiet, but she finally nods. Whether Minseok’s words comfort her or not, he’s not sure.

“… Come on, your song is a cheerful one, isn’t it? You’re supposed to be smiling.”

That cracks a smile on her face. Minseok smiles too – a sincere one, not the one he gave to s when he told them he’s okay. There’s something about the innocent smile that makes him want to smile along while protecting it.

“I think… I better go back,” Hayoung says, standing up and fixing her skirt at the same time. Minseok follows suit, staring as Hayoung brushes her hair away from her shoulder. Her eyes are still red, but at least it’s not clouded with thoughts anymore. Standing up, Minseok realizes that she’s tall, almost as tall as him. His pride hurts a little. What do they give to kids now days?

“Um,” Hayoung’s voice takes Minseok back to the present. “Thank you so much for listening to me, I’m really sorry for bothering you. Ah… Thank you again, Xiumin-ssi.” She bows 90 degree at him and smiles again before walks passed him, out to the corridor.

She knows him. She knows his name. She knows who he is.

It stuns Minseok so much – until he can’t muster a reply.

When he’s back to his consciousness Minseok tries to catch up with the girl, yet all he can see is her back, turning in the corner and disappearing from his sight.

Minseok almost takes a step forward to follow her steps, but he stops himself with a shake of his head. What for? To thank her for recognizing him?

He returns to his own waiting room – Junmyeon exhales when he’s walking through the door – and sits on the couch next to Luhan who’s reading over the lyrics of their song.

Luhan glances at him. “… Something good happened?” he asks.

“Hm? What’s that?”

He shrugs. “You’re smiling.”

Minseok doesn’t even realize that he does. He shrugs back. “Probably?”

And he doesn’t tell a soul, but Minseok knows that he will always remember that day – the day he remembers his dreams and his innocence, all thanks to a certain girl named Oh Hayoung.  

Something I wrote in one-go without too much thoughts. Now back to procrastinating...