“Taehyung, you’re so slow hurry up before we get caught!” I rushed my best friend as we were nearing the end of our secret mission to steal some extra desserts from the kitchen. I was already partly out the door, but my dongsaeng persisted on dilly-dallying while stuffing more small cakes in his mouth than would even fit. I whined a little and pouted when he didn’t even listen and still stood there. Master Nani would be up in a few minutes to ensure all of us were still in bed before starting to prepare breakfast. If Tae Tae and I got caught, we’d suffer the orphanage master’s angry wrath for misbehaving, and no one ever wants to be met with an angry Nani. Even if the both of us were only seven years old, she’d still be unreasonably ruthless. She hardly took care of us as it is. The desserts we were stealing now weren’t even for us; they were for the potential adopters that would be arriving in the morning. I looked at all the cakes Taehyung was beginning to shove in his pockets. We wouldn’t have to sneak if we were allowed even the smallest pleasures…

I quickly dashed over and snatched Taehyung away from the table by his arm before he took enough that Nani would notice. “Yah, hyung I wasn’t done!” He complained loudly and got him completely out of the room and into the corridor where our bedroom was before scolding him. I hit him once upside the head and he hissed in slight pain.

“Ssshh!! Don’t be loud or Nani will catch us! Do you want to be punished?!” I whispered. He pouted and shook his head. Suddenly, he perked up.

“Oh, I grabbed some more cake for you!” he said, producing a smushed cake from his pocket. I blinked at the sweet gesture and took his offer. It was delicious. I looked up at my friend’s grinning face and sighed. Who am I kidding? There’s no way I could ever be mad at my best friend for too long. I opened our bedroom door—well our bedroom that we shared with a ton of other kids. Somehow, Nani managed to store all the orphans into just two small rooms.

I held Taehyung’s hand as I maneuvered us through the dark maze of beds full of snoring children. Finally we arrived at our bed and hopped straight into it, just as Nani opened the room’s door from the hallway. I shifted under the covers and Taehyung did the same, trying to hide ourselves as much as possible to avoid suspicion. We heard Nani’s heels clicking as she slowly walked past every bed; right now she was all the way at the other side of the long room. The only light coming in was that from the hallway when she opened the door and from a few faint street lamps that shone through the windows. So really, Master Nani couldn’t see us all that well.

I looked up at Taehyung to make sure his eyes were shut and he was pretending to be asleep when I noticed he had a cake crumb stuck to the corner of his lips. Oh no! If Nani sees that we’re busted for sure! I quickly swiped it away with my finger, causing Taehyung to start. To stop him from making any noise that would alert Nani that we were awake, I suddenly hugged him around his waist and buried my face in his chest. My stunt worked as he was unhesitant to keep quiet and hug me back instead of making any noise. We had just stopped moving when Nani’s heels stopped clacking and she stood right over our bed. I held my breath. Please don’t catch us! I felt Taehyung softly rubbing my back in reassurance under the covers. Thankfully the movement was small enough that Nani didn’t see it. I finally exhaled as she walked away and out the door. I pulled my face out of my friend’s chest.

“Geez, Tae Tae, that was too close!” I said, my eyes wide. He only chuckled and agreed with me. A moment later, we both finally realized we were still hugging each other. I slightly loosened my grip and spoke up softly, “Tae Tae, you can let go now, Nani’s gone…” I said. I really didn’t want him to, though; he’s really warm. Taehyung pouted.

“But Jiminnie, I don’t wanna, you’re so snuggly!” He said as he pulled me closer again. I smiled to myself and nuzzled back into his chest again.

“Okay then, g’night, Tae Tae.”

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Morning came and with it, the possibility of getting out of this dump.

“Alright you runts, listen up! I want you all on your best behavior, or else! Smile big so these dopes will adopt you and get you out of my hair!” Master Nani yelled at us as she did every morning. I hated being yelled at, I never even did anything to deserve it! All 38 of us stood in a line and saluted as Nani kept pacing back and forth and reprimanding us like a military officer. I could feel myself tearing up whenever she got close to me and yelled extra loudly. I cringed and was about to whimper out loud when I felt Taehyung lightly clasp my hand in his from where he stood by my side. He let go a second after, but it comforted me enough to not cry. I’m glad, because Nani would have screamed at me for that, too.

When Nani was done, she directed us all back to our rooms and told us to get dressed in our best clothes in case any of the ‘dopes’ request to see us. I pulled my shirt over my head and tied up my shoes as Taehyung waited for me to get done.

“C’mon, Jiminnie, let’s go see the new adopters!” Is he nuts?! There’s no way we were allowed out of this room unless Nani calls for us. We’ll get in so much trouble! Before I could object, though, Taehyung had snatched my hand and yanked me out the room, much to the dismay of the other kids who were nowhere near as reckless.

We walked down the hall and down the stairs. The big group was in the living room, all the adults were seated on the many sofas, and the now less-full tray of cakes was on the coffee table. Nani spoke to them all with an artificial smile as they looked over all of our profiles. Taehyung and I peeped at the action from around the corner. I turned for a second and whispered to him.

“Tae Tae, which ones do you want to be our new parents?” I know I spoke like it was guaranteed that we’d be adopted today at all, even less likely that we’d be adopted by the same people. However, we always spoke like this with each other, putting out unbelievable and unrealistic hopes that our time in this jail would be over.

“I dunno, maybe the guy with the mustache and the lady with the short hair. They seem like fun, don’t they?” He offered quietly. I thought about it and nodded.

“I guess, but what about the lady with the blonde hair? She seems cool.”

“Yeah, but look at her husband,” he told me. I did so and couldn’t hold back a laugh as I did. He was really tubby and dressed like a teenager. Taehyung laughed with me, but we tried to keep our giggles as hushed as possible. However, our efforts were fruitless as one couple suddenly looked up.

And right at us.

Whoops.

We scrambled over each other trying to get out of the room before Nani noticed. I made it all the way down to hall, knowing Taehyung was right on my trail. I turned a corner and waited for him to appear next to me.

 But he didn’t.

“What?” I whispered to myself. I looked back around the corner to see my best friend being coddled by the wife that had spotted us. Why?! Tae Tae, why didn’t you run?! And then, my worst fear happened as I heard the father’s words as he spoke to the orphanage master.

“We’d love to take this little champ home to be a part of our family,” he crouched down to Taehyung who had huge, glossy eyes, “Would you like that, Taehyung-ah?”  I know he’d wanted to leave here as much as I did, and he’d definitely say that there was no way he’s going without me. However, I didn’t expect my friend to not even look back at me before he agreed and wrapped the mother in a big hug. Next thing I knew the parents were signing adoption papers right there in the hallway, and they took a laughing, jumping Taehyung right out the door with them.

I stood there, wordless and shocked in the worst possible way. My best friend had just left me all by myself. He didn’t even say goodbye. Tears welled up in my eyes and I felt one thing:

Betrayed.

That night I cried my eyes out, alone for the first time in Taehyung’s and my bed. There was no Taehyung here to wipe the tears away and tell me it would be all better. I continued bawling as I lied there motionless, missing the warmth of my friend next to me. I reached out to hug him and the tears came out even faster when I realized again that he wasn’t there. I managed to finally cry myself to sleep without Taehyung’s comforting embrace, and I felt incredibly empty.

I have no one now.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

~Fifteen Years Later~

I turned over in my bed, stirred from my sleep by the rude sun flooding in through the window. I heard a grunt from the other side and then faintly realized that my boyfriend, Hoseok, had slept over at my apartment last night. He’s always in and out of my life, being my boyfriend whenever he feels like it. We haven’t even been together very long—about a month or so to be exact—but I could already tell he didn’t really like me. He seemed pretty fond of my body, though, hence why neither of us were clothed.

I sighed and looked at the sleeping form next to me. His mouth was hung open and his arm and leg were both flopped over the other side of the bed. In other words, he was about as far away from me as he could get in my queen-sized bed. Just for the sake of trying it, I scooched over to him and experimentally curled into his side, resting my head on his chest. I tried to go back to sleep, but it just wouldn’t come. I ended up just lying there, blinking awkwardly at the wall in front of the bed. Suddenly, the body under me shifted. Hoseok was awake.

I didn’t let him onto any sign that I was actually not sleeping. I just wanted to see, I only hoped that he actually cared a bit about me enough to maybe just cuddle me a little. Just enough to show me that I wasn’t just the plaything I felt like I was to him.

Needless to say, that small hope was immediately crushed as he harshly shoved my head off his chest and pushed my body back over. I acted limp and asleep still. I watched from single cracked eye as Hoseok simply got up to search for all his clothes, dress in them, and walk out the room, closing the door behind him. I waited another second longer and heard the front door to my apartment close. Strangely enough, I felt like I had just had a one night stand with a guy who name just happened to be “my boyfriend.” A warm tear traced its way over my nose as I lay on the pillow, simply contemplating our relationship.

I didn’t have to for long, though. A loud car horn blared through the window. I got up, ignoring the pain in my rear, and looked out my window to see a bright, smiley Hoseok meeting a cute, pale girl by her car. The view was kind of blurred thanks to the snowy sky, but I could still see what was happening. Hoseok trudged through the deep snow and held his arms out to the girl who jumped into them, letting him spin her around once before meeting together in a kiss. I bit my lips but couldn’t even cry any more. I shook my head and left the window. I guess Hoseok wasn’t pleased with his real partner in bed, hence why he was even with me to start with. I bet their relationship wouldn’t last long either once the girl found out Hoseok was gay.

There was that empty feeling again, not that it was ever fully gone anyway. I dug through my top dresser drawer and finally found what I was looking for. I walked back to my bed with the stuffed bear and buried my face in its unnaturally bright orange fur. Tae Tae always provided me with a sort of warmth that only one other human being was ever able to make me feel.

~flashback~

“Happy tenth birthday, Jimin!” I looked up at my adopted umma and appa. There was a big party banner hung behind them with my name on it, balloons, and a few streamers in places. My appa had a small cake in his hands that was decorated with my favorite color frosting.

“Thanks umma and appa!” It wasn’t just my birthday. Today is also the same day they adopted me last year from the orphanage. I tried not to think about that place too much anymore since any happy memory I had there was overpowered by the loneliness I felt once Taehyung left. All the happy memories involved him anyway.

“Jimin, do you want to blow out your candles?” My appa crouched down so that the cake was right in front of me. I took in a deep breath and blew out all ten of the waxy sticks. My umma cheered and clapped. Shortly after, we dug into the cake and after the first bite I took I couldn’t finish it. I couldn’t suppress the memory of that time Taehyung shared his stolen cake with me in the hallway. I dropped my fork and frowned, missing my friend again. My appa seemed to notice my mood change.

“Hey, sport, why don’t you open your present now?” he said and set a prettily-wrapped box atop the table. Curious, I hopped off my chair and walked around to pick it up. It was pretty light. I plopped down on the floor, putting the box in front of me as I ripped the paper off. After removing the lid, I stuck my hand inside and it reemerged holding a bright orange bear.

“Omo! He’s so cute, I love him!” I squealed as I cuddled the bear. I kissed the top of his head and then got up to kiss my umma and appa on the cheek before returning to my new toy. My umma chuckled and bent over, placing a hand on my shoulder and look me in the eye.

“Glad you like him, honey. Do you want to give him a name?” I thought about it for a minute. There was only one name that came to mind, though.

“His name is now… Tae Tae.”

~flashback end~

I sniffled. When had the tears even started up again? I clutched Tae Tae closer as I sat up and wiped my face. Holding the bear in front of me at arm’s length, I forced myself to smile a little. Taehyung wouldn’t want me to be sad, I thought to myself. Giving the bear one last cuddle, I placed him on my bed and got ready to leave out for the day to take my mind off Hoseok.

I wrapped my scarf up around my nose, put my hat on and was out the door. I made it all the way to the lobby and out of the apartment complex and began to walk down the salt-covered pavement to no particular destination. I tried my hardest to keep my mind blank and focus on the hustle and bustle of the city around me, but only one person occupied my thoughts the whole time I walked: Taehyung, of course. I’ve never missed anyone so much, not even my biological parents for crying out loud. I hated to admit it, but Taehyung had always been—and still is—my everything, my first and foremost. Even after he’d betrayed me, I couldn’t bring myself to hold a grudge. I guess I loved him enough to forgive him for even that.

“, where did he go?!” I was brought back into reality by the frustrated voice of a stranger. I looked closer through the snowy curtain and saw that he was digging through a heap of snow. I walked up to him and tapped him on the shoulder.

“Excuse me, did you lose something?” The man stood up, startled, or at least that’s what I could tell from his eyes. The rest of his face was covered by a snow mask.

“Oh, uhh, yeah…” he looked down and cleared his throat but didn’t continue.

“Well, maybe I can help you search for it,” I offered, “What is it?” he hesitated before responding in a quiet voice.

“It’s um, it’s my… stuffed bear…” he mumbled. I chuckled at his nervousness. He heard it though and was quick to fire back.

“YAH! I don’t need you judging me, I can look myself!” I put my hands up defensively as he shouted.

“It’s okay! I’m not judging you at all, I swear!” He backed down a little. I turned towards the snow-covered grass and gestured to the general area, “So you lost him somewhere around here?” He nodded and we sifted through the huge piles of snow in silence for a few minutes. Eventually, I came across a purple tuft of artificial fur, “Hey, I found him!”

The man immediately jumped up and ran over to me, snatching the toy from my hands, “OMO, thanks sooo much!” I was taken aback when he suddenly hugged me. I awkwardly patted his back a couple times and he got the idea and let go. He rubbed the back of his neck, “Ehh, thanks… sorry about that.” I shook my head.

“Nah, it’s okay. I totally understand. To be honest, I keep a stuffed bear, too. My parents gave him to me when I was little and he’s very special to me,” the stranger nodded and pointed with his thumb in the direction I’d been walking.

“Hey, I was just on my way to take him to get dry cleaned, wanna walk with me?” I shrugged. I have nothing better to do, so why not?

“Sure,” I said and we set off walking at a slow pace. The snow started blowing harder, I readjusted my scarf over my face, “So do they do stuffed animals at the dry cleaners?” I lightly questioned. He shrugged and laughed a little.

“I have no idea, but I hope so, otherwise I brought Minnie out of the house for nothing.”

“Yeah, you’re pretty brave to take Minnie outside, I’ve never even taken Tae Tae out of my bedroom,” I looked over to him when I noticed he’d stopped walking to stare into space. “Hey, what happened?” He shook his head and then jogged a few feet to catch up with me.

“Nothing, it’s just that my best friend used to call me Tae Tae, too. I just remembered him again is all,” I furrowed my brows.

“What a coincidence, I named my bear after my best friend.”

“I did, too. I still miss him every day, even all these years later, I can’t help it. There’s only one regret I’ve had my entire life, and that’s not saying goodbye to him when I had the chance,” I looked at him again and saw that his eyes had reddened. He quickly sopped up the tears from them with a gloved hand and spoke up before I could even respond, “Sorry, I have no idea why I’m pouring my life out to you when I’ve only just met you.” He laughed sadly at himself. Without thinking, I patted his shoulder in comfort.

“Hey, it’s getting pretty cold out here,” I pointed to a lit up building down our path, “Why don’t we stop in that café real quick to warm up?”

“Yeah, that sound’s good.” We arrived at the place and didn’t even go to the counter to order. We went straight to a table near the wall of the small eatery. I looked down to remove my coat and unwrap my scarf when the man across from me suddenly gasped. I looked up in confusion and his eyes were widened again. He slowly moved his hands up to undo his snow mask and I wondered why he was acting so stra—

“T-Taehyung?” I couldn’t be… there was no way this person was sitting in front of me right now. No possible way. Before I could stop myself I choked and let tears stream down my face. I’d started crying right in that café because sitting right in front of me was no other than Kim ing Taehyung.

I didn’t care how much attention I was drawing to myself as I was now openly sobbing. The only thing I registered was when Taehyung’s arms were around me, hugging me almost to the point of suffocation. I squeezed him right back and choked again when I heard him whisper to me as I buried my face in his neck.

“Jimin, you have no idea how much I’ve missed you.” Oh but I do. I laughed in disbelief and gripped him even tighter.

“Probably as much as I’ve missed you, you dope.”

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

I dragged Taehyung into my apartment and shut the door behind us. I hadn’t let his hand go since we’d left the café. There’s no way on Earth I’m letting him get away from me again. For a second I just stood there, not knowing what to do next. He caught onto my cluelessness I guess because he squeezed my hand then.

“Jiminnie,” oh how long it’s been since I’ve heard that name from those lips, “We have to let go to take our coats off.” Oh… right. Reluctantly, I removed all my stupidly layered clothes until I was finally left in my tee shirt, jeans, and socks. Taehyung did the same and immediately grabbed my hand again, intertwining our fingers.

“I… I don’t even know where to start,” we’d missed out on fifteen years of conversation. Taehyung smiled and released my hand. I internally panicked for a second as he did so but then calmed back down when I felt his warmth pressed up against my back and his arms around me. I exhaled and let my head fall back onto him. He chuckled and pressed his face into my neck. I shivered as his lips brushed my skin when he spoke.

“How have you been, Jiminnie?” And that’s how we ended up talking for hours. About our families (Taehyung’s adopted parents had adopted four other kids, too), our schools (Taehyung slept better in classes than he did in a bed), even our love lives (Taehyung had never even kissed anyone).  Over the span of time we were talking, we’d moved from standing in the hallway, to sitting on the sofa, and finally settling down in my bed. All the while our bodies were in contact with each other in one way or another. I still had to keep touching him to ensure that he was indeed really here. The bedroom gradually darkened as the sun set. We both lay in bed, hugged up similarly to the very first time we ever had: that day he and I stole Master Nani’s cake.

He kept talking as I nuzzled my face further into his chest, soaking in the familiar warmth I’ve been deprived of for much too long. I sighed in contentedness as his steady voice nearly lulled me to sleep. I would have fallen asleep, too had one thing not dawned on me.

“Yah, Tae Tae,” I stopped him from blabbering on any longer about his ‘awesome’ car.  He hummed in acknowledgement. “You never told me, why haven’t you ever wanted to date somebody?” I waited patiently for his response as I noticed his heart started to beat faster in his chest.

“Because…” he started in a whisper. I chuckled.

“Well that’s not an answer. Because what?” I pressed.

“Because… I was waiting for somebody in particular,” his voice was so quiet now that even within this proximity I could hardly hear him. I removed my face from his chest to look him in the eye. His gaze met mine and he simply stared, as if he was searching for something in my eyes.

“Do you know who?” he hurriedly nodded but didn’t say anything. I rolled my eyes and playfully smacked his back, “Well then tell me who it is. As my best friend, it is your sworn duty to…” I trailed off as suddenly Taehyung removed his arm from around me to let his hand rest gently on my cheek, caressing my face. I looked at him curiously and felt my cheeks warm. Taehyung smiled softly.

“Jiminnie, you grew up so beautifully,” he said. I blinked a couple times, unsure how to respond to that. He had begun my cheek with his thumb so I placed my hand over his to stop his ministrations.

“T-Taehyung, stop being strange and give me an answer!” I gently squeezed his hand so he’d get on with it already. I couldn’t help it, I was growing a bit impatient. Guess who was still playing the quiet game? “Taehyung, would you just—mmph!”

If there was ever an effective way to shut someone up, it’s with a kiss, of course. Kim Taehyung, my childhood friend, my first and foremost, my everything… had just given me his first kiss. It was gentle and quick, but I didn’t have to interpret what it meant.

Because then, he told me exactly what it meant.

“Park Jimin, I’ve always loved you.”

A/N: Suggested by the lovely jessie14 ^^ thanks so much for the prompt, I really enjoyed writing this!

P.S. HAPPY 2015 EVERYBODY~~~