Daiyu who was dressed in full school uniform looked at me with wide eyes.

"Why are you not dressed? We have school in twenty minutes!" 

I sat up in my bed, "I'm not going, I'm sick."

"Is this because of yesterday?" she asked sitting at the end of my bed. 

I shifted awkwardly suddenly feeling my cousin's gaze on me. 

"You do look a bit peaky and lifeless. But come on, all you need is some fresh air."

"I'm not going" I repeated. 

"What if Jackson shows up at school ready to apologise?" 

"So what? Give him a thumbs up from me," I said sarcastically. 

Daiyu rolled her eyes and shook me lightly, "Maya, stop playing around and get ready!"

"I told you I'm not going to school and that's final," I said adamantly, burying myself underneath the covers. 

I heard my cousin sigh before leaving my room. 

 

When I woke up what seemed like a couple of hours later, light was streaming fully through the curtains. 

I got up and had a shower. After I had done my hair, put on simple clothes I left the house to get some air. 

I wasn't planning on going to the park this time. I didn't want to go back to such a sweet place with all the memories that were slowly turning sour.

Just as I closed the door behind me, I turned to see Daiyu, Jb and Bambam on the other side of the road. I wasn't aware that it was so late in the day, and I only realised that they must be coming home from school. 

Daiyu had one hand in Jb's and she used her other to wave at me, Bambam also copied my cousin's greeting. Just a few paces behind her was Jr, Yugyeom and Jackson. They never go home this way. 

Ignoring Daiyu and Bambam, I turned abruptly and walked on down the road. 

"Yah! Maya!" I heard my cousin call, but I was too mortified to turn back. As soon as I got to the bottom of the road, I turned the corner and ran when I knew I was out of sight. 

I wasn't in the mood to see any of them. Not my cousin, not Bambam and certainly not Jackson. 

I was so embarrassed by Jinhee's comments in front of the entire class yesterday. They may have been said in the heat of the moment, but they hurt me deep down. Maybe I was ruining everything after being introduced to their friendship group last. I'm sure there was little to no drama before I came along.

 

I quickly entered the local convenience store which was situated on the next road. Not only would it be a good place to hide, but I was now thirsty from running from my friends.

When I saw who it was, I stood up abruptly and placed the rest of the drinks in their original places.

"Thanks," I said bluntly, before turning down another isle and going to the counter. 

"That'll be 1500 won, please," the cashier said. 

Before I took my purse out to pay, Jackson came behind me and put the money into the cashier's hand. 

The tall man looked surprised at the sudden gesture from the assumed stranger. 

"Annyeong," I said, leaving both Jackson and the cashier in the shop. 

I took one gulp of juice before I was interrupted by Jackson. 

"How's your drink?" he asked, lowering his mask to expose his face fully. He looked a mixture of tired and sombre. His lips were also a lot redder than usual. Maybe he felt as sad as I did.

"Good, thank you," I said walking back towards my house. I tried to sound composed, but inside I was a mess.

Jackson pulled at my arm, "Maya, I want to say sorry. I'm really sorry."

I turned around to face him. His eyebrows were knitted with worry and his whole face frowned in an almost pleading manner. Jackson's brown eyes also seemed redder and more watery than usual. On any other day this sight would have broke my heart, it was breaking my heart now. But I couldn't let Jackson know that he'd hurt me, because I'd seem like the fool. 

"And you think buying me a bottle of juice is going to make up for it?" I asked furiously.

Jackson looked at the ground, "No, of course not," he said quietly. 

"See this is what I don't understand about you Jackson. If I had told everyone that I liked you, and we started dating, when would you have told me the truth about you and Jinhee?" 

Jackson scratched his cheek with his forefinger. 

"I would have. I was thinking of the right words to say."

"Or would we even start dating? What if I became part of another one of your secret relationships, like your previous one with Jinhee?" I asked. 

"Let me explain," Jackson reasoned.
I looked at him seriously, "You've really hurt Jinhee." I swallowed the lump in my throat. I didn't want to admit to him that I was hurting as much as Jinhee probably was right now. 

"I'm not going to lie and say it was a one-time thing. But it started when I heard rumours of you liking Mark. So I watched you guys doing that dare at Mun's...well I wasn't in the room, but everyone knew you both liked each other from that. It hurt, and Jinhee was there to comfort me."

"So you've been using Jinhee? That's low Jackson," I said. 

"I tried to like her, I convinced myself that I did at one point. But the more I thought about it, the more I knew that you were the only one I had feelings for."
I couldn't meet Jackson's eyes. His sudden confessions were making me feel uncomfortable, and I didn't like how my feelings of anger were slowly dissolving. 

"Do you know how embarrassed I was yesterday? Jinhee went crazy in front of the whole class. Acting like I'm some foreigner that you'll just want to use, that Mark will want to use. That you won't take me seriously. That maybe I should go back home, do you know what that feels like Jackson?" I asked.

Jackson only shook his head in response. 

"Where were you yesterday? Did you just not want to show your face after hearing the news?" I questioned rhetorically, attempting to laugh. It felt as though the air could no longer get into my lungs properly.

"I'm sorry," Jackson said, as he proceeded to take my hands in his, but I grabbed my own away. 

"Let's stop pretending you're doing all this now for me. You're doing this for your own selfish reasons. I really thought Mark was the one to watch out for out of the pair of you, I was so wrong," I said finally before turning away from Jackson and walking home. My legs were shaking, my hands were shaking and my heart was beating rapidly. Only once I got outside of my house did I turn around to view the bottom of the road. Jackson wasn't there. 

 

Me and Daiyu were eating dinner silently. There was an awkward quietness in the air after I had ignored her earlier. We hadn't spoke about the incident either. 

I was thankful that Daiyu's parents would be returning from Busan soon. I missed having the parental figures around. 

"What do you think of the beef?" my cousin asked into the silence. 

"It's good."

"Why are you acting so moody?" Daiyu asked. 

I put my spoon down, "Why do you think, Daiyu? Ever since I've been introduced to your friends everything has gone wrong. I can't even talk to Bambam normally any more without getting the idea that he's going to report back to you. And Jackson, don't get me started on him, you should never have introduced me to Jackson." I mentally scolded myself for bringing the conversation back to Jackson. 

My cousin chewed silently, looking at me in confusion.

Luckily there was a knock at the front door to save us from any more conversation. 

"I'll get it," I said standing up to answer the door. 

I opened it, to see Jb. A figure was quite a distance behind him, it was Mark. 

"Hi Jb, what are you doing here?" I asked in confusion. 

Jb held up a navy blue scarf, "Daiyu left this at my house, I came to return it to her. Do you mind if I go in?" 

He walked passed me and through the hall, leaving Mark and I awkwardly staring at each other from a distance away. 

"Did you sort things out with Jackson?" he asked walking up to me. 

I smiled at him weakly, "Sort of."
"What do you mean?" he asked, rubbing his hands together. I assumed that the cold was getting to him.

"He said sorry. But I didn't accept the apology," I said. 

There was a silence between us for a few moments, and I could just hear the sound of a distant siren and the evening air. 

Mark nodded momentarily, "You know his feelings for you aren't going to go away any time soon, right?"

I looked down at my folded hands, "I don't care any more. You saw what state I was in yesterday. And feelings aren't always deep-rooted, maybe he'll lose them quickly," I explained, hoping that all my feelings for Jackson would disappear soon.

"You're right. That reminds me, are you feeling any better today?" he asked. 

"Kind of. I'm just annoyed and angry, and when I'm angry I end up crying," I explained. 

Mark sighed, "Me too."

"You cry?" I asked, surprised. 

I wasn't shocked because he was a guy, I was shocked because it was Mark and I just couldn't imagine him crying. 

"Only when I'm angry about a situation," he said looking at me seriously. 

I nodded. 

"I'm glad you and...you guys haven't fallen out over this," I admitted.

Mark looked at his hands, "We haven't spoke. He didn't tell me about him and Jinhee so he must feel slightly awkward."

"I understand that. Thanks for being understanding about all of this."
"I thought we got all the apologies and thank you's out of the way yesterday," Mark said laughing lightly. 

"Well apart from um...the apology today..." he stuttered. 

"Can we not talk about him? I'd feel better that way for now at least. Until I get over the whole thing," I asked. Get over what?

"Okay," he agreed. 

I turned to grab my slippers and shuffled outside towards Mark. 

"Thank you," I smiled.

"No more thank you's!" he grinned and hugged me, before I had time to react. 

Mark's arms were wrapped around me lightly. He was cold which was a strange contrast from how comforting the hug was.

"You're freezing," I said quietly, wriggling a little. 

"I'm not going to say sorry for that," Mark laughed. 

The only sound I could hear was Mark breathing and my own heart. 

We carried on hugging for a minute or so before I heard someone clearing their throat behind us. 

Once I let go of Mark, I observed Jb who was stood at the doorstep, with my cousin huddled next to him. Daiyu was smiling faintly and Jb had his eyebrows raised in surprise. 

Daiyu and I said goodbye to Mark and Jb before returning to the front room. 

"You're feeling better aren't you?" my cousin asked.

"Why?" 

"You don't look peaky any more. Either that or you're blushing," Daiyu said sneakily. 

I shrugged, "Must be the fresh air."

 

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Hi everyone! So this is a little update. I feel like I'm dividing a lot of you with this story haha- Jackson or Mark is the question. Thank you to all those who have recently commented/subscribed/upvoted, I thoroughly appreciate it! I also love reading your comments so please tell me what you think of this chapter.