"Hey, Nai Nai."

"Baekhyun dear, come in!" she ushered him inside, before wrapping her arms around him in a warm hug which he happily returned.

"He's in his room," she said, face dropping. It was times like this where Baekhyun could see the truth of her age. Of course, Baekhyun had known to expect this- it was a yearly occurrence on this day.

He didn't bother to knock on the door, and found Yixing on his bed exactly how he'd expected, looking at him with a solemn expression and piece of paper in his hand- something which was also a yearly occurrence.

"Hey, Xing."

Yixing forced a smile, before standing up.

"You ready to go?"

Yixing nodded.

No words were exchanged in the car. It was like this every year, and Baekhyun, despite being best friends with someone who was mute, always found the silence deafening.

They arrived at a small graveyard, hidden behind trees and grass, where they took the same path for the eighth time, both their usual childish demeanours and antics gone with the wind as they walked. They stopped when they arrived to two closely placed together gravestones, written in Mandarin. Scripted on them were the only words Baekhyun could read and write, just because he'd seen them so often.

The two sat down side by side, and Yixing timidly handed the paper over to Baekhyun that he'd been holding.

Next year. Maybe next year.

It always made Baekhyun’s heart drop when his eyes skimmed down the paper, but, like the seven years previous to this, he read on.

“Mum, dad, it’s been a while, right? I try to visit you when I can, but school is frustrating and I always remember you telling me to try my hardest. You wouldn’t want me here, right? But I have to come today. Of course I would, and even knowing that you wouldn’t want me to come, I still will. I was stubborn as a kid and that has not changed.

Nai Nai is doing well, she received a promotion a few weeks ago so she’s very happy. She won’t let me get a job at the facility for deaf children to help because of school, so she’s glad she’s getting paid more now. She wouldn’t use the money you’d left me, she says it’s for me for university. I feel bad, she works very hard for me. She misses you a lot, says she even misses the mess and the noise, and the complaining.”

Yixing let his head rest on Baekhyun’s shoulder as he spoke, fully awake, but eyes closed.          

“Baekhyun is doing really well- he has a boyfriend now and I swear they are attached at the hip. He misses you, too. He still helps me out a lot. I don’t know what I’m going to do when I reach university, I guess I’ll have to look at alternatives until I-” Baekhyun cut himself off, looking at the words on the page and shaking his head as he purposely changed what they said.

Man up.

“- figure out what to do.”

Yixing punched Baekhyun’s shoulder, but Baekhyun paid it no mind.

“And me, I’m doing very well. I’m… dating someone. He’s called Joonmyun, we’ve been going out for almost a month, now? He’s lovely, you’d really like him. He treats me so well, I don’t know how I can deserve someone like him. Maybe I’ll bring him to visit in the future, if he’d like to. It’s nice to have someone else to deal with me, that isn’t Baekhyun.”

Baekhyun cut out the next bit.

He must get tired.        

Yixing noticed, and smiled softly.

“I miss you, not a day goes through without me thinking of you. I hope I’m making you proud. I love you so much.”

They stayed there for a while longer, Baekhyun being the one to speak. He spoke about everything, though mainly Yixing. Stupid things he’d done in the past year, not so embarrassing things he’d done in the past year. It managed to bring somewhat a smile to Yixing’s face, but as they left the mood was solemn as usual, the car ride silent as it had been on the way.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to stay?” Baekhyun asked as he parked out the front of Yixing’s house. It was something he asked every year, and every year received the same response.

“No, I’m okay.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, you have plans, anyway.”

“I don’t have to…”

Yixing winked as he tapped his nose, and Baekhyun let out a light chuckle.

“Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said, leaning across the gearstick to give Yixing a hug before he got out of the car.

Yixing walked inside, and the first thing Nai Nai did was wrap her arms around him.

It was also like this every year.

“Are you okay?”

Nod.

“I’m going out shopping. Do you need anything?”

She also asked this every year. Yixing guessed it was her way of giving him privacy, and he was thankful for that.

“No, it’s okay.”

“Alright, message me if you think of anything,” she smiled warmly, and Yixing gave her a weak one in return, whilst going to his room.

Yixing liked being alone. He liked the silence that came with it.  Hell, with seven years of living in it, it’d grown to be a comfort to him. But he hated feeling lonely, and whilst he could vividly remember the last time he’d felt like this, it was so long ago that he’d disregarded the thought of ever feeling like it again.

It hurt. It hurt so much. All he could do was curl up, back against the wall on his bed as he cried.

From: Joonmyun
Where are you? Are you okay? >.<

From: Joonmyun
Baekhyun isn’t here either, is everything alright?

From: Joonmyun
Chanyeol said Baekhyun told him that you both weren’t going to be here today?
If you need anything, let me know alright xx

From: Joonmyun
I miss you :(
Chanyeol won’t stop poking me ;-;

Yixing looked at the messages Joonmyun had sent him from the morning. He wasn’t entirely sure whether he’d forgotten to tell him he wasn’t going to school today, or if he’d simply avoided it. There were questions involved he didn’t quite want to answer to yet. However, he couldn’t help feel bad for not responding to Joonmyun for what was now hours.

To: Joonmyun
Yeah, I’m fine.

Whilst Yixing knew he was fine, he couldn’t say he particularly felt it.

He missed a lot of people- people he couldn’t ever see or hear again.

To: Joonmyun
Can you call me?

Joonmyun’s response was immediate.

Are you okay? What’s wrong?

To: Joonmyun
I just want to hear your voice.

To: Joonmyun
Please. Just talk about anything.

He didn’t care if he was coming off as desperate, and when Joonmyun called Yixing answered in a heartbeat, placing the phone on loudspeaker and placing it next to his head on the bed. Joonmyun’s voice was calming, comforting, and it filled Yixing with a sense of… something. He didn’t know what it was, but it was something he’d grown to almost need.

Joonmyun wasn’t surprised at the lack of response, and whilst he couldn’t see Yixing it didn’t mean he couldn’t hear the sniffling coming from the other end. Yixing wasn’t fine.

He didn’t let Yixing know he knew- he knew him well enough to know he’d prefer it this way. However, It didn’t stop him from hanging up as Yixing’s breathing evened out and he fell asleep after the few hours of Joonmyun’s soothing voice talking about nothing, but at the same time so much, before leaving his house and arriving at the doorstep of his boyfriend’s.

“Ms Zhang, I’m sorry I didn’t give you any notice.”

She gathered Joonmyun in a warm hug, giving him a knowing look.

“He’s in his room,” she said, softly. “He’s asleep.”

“I know,” he said, “May I come in?”

Nai Nai stepped aside, letting him enter.

“Thank you,” she said, smiling with her eyes, just the way her grandson did.

The first thing Joonmyun saw when he entered Yixing’s room was the boy curled up on the bed, back against the wall. His eyes were puffy and red, his cheeks tearstained, yet his expression didn’t match the discoloration on his face. He looked peaceful, and Joonmyun thought it was kind of beautiful. As quietly as he could, Joonmyun shut the door before approaching Yixing and laying down on his side on the bed, head resting on his hand as he used the other to softly brush Yixing’s fringe out of his face. Like a magnet, Yixing was attracted to the warmth and shifted closer, curling into Joonmyun’s body.

“Hey, baby.”

Yixing quite liked waking up to Joonmyun’s face, though he didn’t know why he was there. He opened and closed his eyes slowly to adjust to the light, though the radiance coming from Joonmyun’s smile had never been easy to concede to.

“Why’re you here?”

“I wanted to be.”

It took Yixing a few more seconds to remember what’d happened before he’d fallen asleep. Unconsciously, he snuggled closer.

“You didn’t have to come. I said I was fine.”

“You didn’t sound fine.”

“I’m alright.”

And it scared Yixing how comforting Joonmyun’s presence was. From the moment he’d heard his voice through the phone, the sense of loneliness he’d felt had dissolved. He was developing a dependency on the other which he didn’t think was safe for a person like him, but he didn’t think he could stop it, either.

“You don’t have to tell me what it is,” Joonmyun kissed the top of Yixing’s head, “I just don’t want you to be sad alone.”  

Yixing mustered a weak smile- he really did appreciate everything Joonmyun did for him. “Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me.” Joonmyun responded, linking their fingers together as Yixing’s eyes closed once more. He hoped he was helping take the pain away, no matter what it was.

“Why are you like this?”

“What do you mean?”

The two sat cross-legged on Yixing’s bed. It was a few hours since Joonmyun had come over, and Yixing had told him why he hadn’t been in the best mood. However, he hadn’t told him that this was the first time in years it’d been so bad.

“There’s nothing-” Yixing looked a bit lost for words. “Wrong with you. There’s everything wrong with me but nothing wrong with you.”

“That’s not true!” Joonmyun frowned. “Don’t say that about yourself.”

“I don’t talk when I can. Isn’t that enough wrong?”

“There’s nothing wrong with that.”

“Then what’s wrong with you?”

“For one, I’m terrible at sign language.”

“That’s bull, Joonmyun.”

“But I always speak to you! I’m too worried I’ll muck it up and half the time I have to ask you to spell the word out.”

“Well, one- you wouldn’t have to understand it if I would just open my mouth, and two- you’re worrying too much about screwing it up. I really don’t care, it means so much to me that you already try.”

“I’m short.”

Yixing laughed, “Well that is true!”

Joonmyun pouted.

“It doesn’t bother me, stupid. It’s not like I’m scared you’re a gremlin or something.”

“Are you saying I look like a gremlin!?!”

Yixing laughed even harder, hand covering his mouth, and soon Yixing joined him.

“Well me if I’m attracted to them. I think I have a bigger problem. That is scary.”

“Don’t even get me started on things that are scary.”

“What even is scary?”

“Lots of things!”

“What are you scared of, then?”

Joonmyun was hesitant to answer. “Thunderstorms,” he said slowly. “I hate them- can’t even sleep through them.”

“That’s so cute.”

“It’s not!” Joonmyun whined, “I’m nearly a fully grown man and I’m afraid of thunderstorms?”

“It’s okay to be afraid of thunder.”

“But I’m really afraid of thunder.”

“It can’t be that bad.”

“It can be.” he said embarrassedly.

“You remind me of thunderstorms, to be honest.”

“What? Why?” Joonmyun asked, clearly shocked. “I’m not that loud.”

Yixing laughed. “No, no. You just do.”

“Why?”

“I think… You were coming but I didn’t see until it was too late- then you struck.” Yixing began to blush. “You shocked me and swept me up in the storm.”

Joonmyun tilted his head, much like a puppy. “I think I get what you mean,” he said, softly. “Whenever I touch you I feel electricity run through me. Whenever I’m near you my heart beats so fast it blocks out all the noise in my head and it’s all I can hear- like the rain.”

Yixing’s face was a bright shade of pink, now, but the smile he was trying to hide gave away that he felt the same way. It was his turn to be embarrassed now- Joonmyun was the more frank and shameless side of their relationship, of course.

“What else are you afraid of?” he changed the subject, and Joonmyun didn’t fight it.

“Spiders.”

“Lame.”

“Clowns.”

“That’s normal.”

“Losing you.”

Yixing’s eyes softened, and he let out a soft sigh.

“Don’t think about that- I like you just as much as you like me.”

Joonmyun smiled, but it was weak. Yixing didn’t know what to do to convince him of this fact, something he’d been trying to do for weeks, now.

“What are you afraid of?”

Yixing froze, wondering whether or not he’d answer. He only had one real fear in this world, and guessed it was kind of obvious given his situation.

“Speaking.”  

Yixing was greeted by Baekhyun at school with a headlock.

“Hey, kiddo. You okay today?”

“Get off me, jeez. I am fine.”

“I’m glad.” Baekhyun grinned. He was in such a great mood that Yixing purposely stopped himself wondering what had happened- presumably with Chanyeol- the day before.

Baekhyun noticed Yixing was in a somewhat better mood than usual the day after the anniversary of his parent’s death, too. He couldn’t help but be curious.

”What happened after I left?”

Yixing looked down, smiling softly. “Joonmyun came over.”

“Oh,” was all Baekhyun could reply, trying to keep his smile what it had been previously, though he couldn’t deny the drop in his mood.

“Hey Baek, you okay?” his boyfriend sidled up to him, wrapping his arm around his torso, clearly in a mood as great as Baekhyun had been minutes previous.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” Baekhyun answered, a little too quickly for Chanyeol’s liking, though he decided not to question it.

 Authors Note 

It is chapter four. Drama has finally started. Maybe?'
Ohohohohoho.

Sorry this took a while, I wanted to focus on my exams but now I am done yes <3
If you read EXO Studios I plan on updating that soon but no promises orz.

Thank you as always for reading/upvoting/subscribing!
Please don't be afraid to comment, it really means a lot to me :)

'Til next time!

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