Taeyeon’s

            I went to my apartment on Monday morning. She already went to work as usual like nothing happened, huh? I scoffed, so she didn’t even care that I didn’t come home for two nights, did she?

            I took a shower and got ready for work. I prepared an overnight bag and packed up my pajamas, toiletries, and clothes. 

            “Taeng, lunch!” Sooyung went to my desk right when it’s lunchtime.

            “Just a minute.” I saved my work on my laptop.

            “What’s that?” I put my laptop to sleep and followed her line of sight, which was to my overnight bag.

            “Um... that’s my overnight bag.”

            “You’re sleeping at my apartment again?” she raised her eyebrows.

            “Can I?”

            She let out a sigh, “Of course you can.”

            “Does Oppa mind?” I referred to her roommate.

            “No, he doesn’t mind, Taeyeon-ah. It’s just................”

            “What?” I started to gather my stuff and stood up.

            “Don’t you want to settle this with Tiffany? Talk to her?”

            “She didn’t even look for me, Sooyoung-ah.”

            I started to walk towards the elevator and Sooyoung followed closely behind.

            “She did! She asked me and Hyomin. I told you that she’s worried over you.”

            I sneered, “She went to work like nothing happen.”

            “Well what do you want her to do? Skipped work just because you guys had a huge fight?”

            The elevator came and we went inside. I didn’t answer Sooyoung’s question since there were other people inside the elevator.

            Once we got out on our destination floor, she stopped me and looked at me sternly, “Don’t be childish, Taeng.”

            “I’m not! I just want her to care.”

            “She does!”

            “Whose side are you on?!”

            “Nobody’s!”

            People started to look at us and I resumed walking to the cafeteria. I went straight to queue for buying meals and Sooyung still followed suit.

            “Tae, listen. You need to talk it out with her. You can sleep at my place as long as you want, but you can’t avoid her like this.”

            I looked back at her and let out a sigh, “I just need more time, Soo.”

            “Okay, but don’t take too long. She’s hurting too, you know.”

            I wanted to scoff at that but she nudged me to move up the line. I turned around and dismissed what Sooyoung just said.      

Tiffany’s

            Tuesday. I went to work not as early as before. I couldn’t sleep last night. I just lied down on my bed, listening to every sound, hoping like a fool to hear Taeyeon coming home. Therefore, I got up a little bit late but thankfully there’s no morning meeting today.

             I knew she had her cellphone with her and I wanted to at least send her a text. But I didn’t know what to say to her. I was guilty but then again, I was also mad at her for leaving and not giving me any news in the last two days.

            “Unnie? Unnie?” Juhyun’s voice interrupted my train of thoughts and I saw her confused look.

            “Are you okay, Unnie? You seem distracted lately.”

            I dismissed her by waving my hand and continued eating, “I’m fine, Juhyun-ah.”

            “But you’re very quiet. You didn’t even respond the first time I call you.”

            “Sorry, I spaced out for a little bit.”

            “Is there something wrong, Unnie? You can tell me.” She said worriedly.

            I wanted to tell her. But... but... I couldn’t tell her without revealing my relationship with a girl.

            Actually, before lunch I asked Hyomin to eat with me, but unfortunately she had a lunch meeting today.

            I gave Juhyun a smile, “Thanks, Juhyun-ah. But there’s nothing wrong. I’m fine.”

            I tried to talk about something else to divert the topic, but my mind couldn’t seem to be diverted to anything else than Kim Taeyeon.

            When I came home to still an empty and dark apartment, I almost broke down in tears. She didn’t come home again.

            I took a long warm bath but even after that I didn’t feel refreshed or relax. I picked my cellphone and went to her room.

            I got inside the cover and her scent filled my nose instantly.

            I miss her.

            I picked up my cellphone. I wanted to hear her voice. Should I call her? But what if she rejected my call? Maybe a text was better. I started to type. I wanted to say I’m sorry and ask her to come home. But...... it didn’t seem right to say it over text. So in the end I typed:

Where are you?

            My thumb hovered on the ‘send’ button for a quiet long time. Should I send it? Would she even reply?

            Wednesday morning. I was still on her bed and she didn’t even reply to my message last night.

            I didn’t have the desire to go to work. I didn’t have the desire to do anything actually. I sent a text my assistant, saying I was not feeling well so I couldn’t go to work today. The first time ever I didn’t want to go to work since I’m the head department. The first time ever I didn’t go to work and lied about being sick.

            By lunch, I was still sprawled on her bed. Juhyun sent me a text, worrying about me and I told her I was just a little bit under the weather. Hyomin sent me a text also, asking if I wanted to have lunch together since she couldn’t do it yesterday.

            I decided to call her.

            “Hello?”

            “Hey, want to have lunch together?”

            “Um... I didn’t go to work today actually.”

            “Oh? Are you sick?”

            “No. I just... don’t feel like going to work.”

            The line went quiet for a second before she spoke again, “Taeyeon hasn’t come home?”

            “How did you kno-”

            “Sooyoung told me she’s been staying at her place. What’s going on, Fany?”

            “Didn’t Sooyoung tell you why also?” I asked tiredly.    

            “No, she just said that you two got into a big fight.”

            I let out a sigh, “We did.”

            “How big was the fight that made her left?”

            “It’s a long story, Hyomin-ah.”

            “How about I drop by after work?”

            “You don’t have to do that.”

            “I want to! And clearly, you need someone to talk to. I’ll be there as soon work is done, okay?”

            She wouldn’t back down anyway, “Okay.”

            “Good. Don’t do anything stupid now.”

            I rolled my eyes, “I won’t.”

            “See you later then. Bye.”

            “Bye.”

            I hung up and put my cellphone under the pillow. Feeling a little bit better, at least I still had someone to talk to.

            “FANY-AH!”            

            I opened my eyes instantly when I heard the shout of my name. I blinked a couple of times to adjust to the sudden light.

            “Goodness God, did you just lay there all day?”

            I finally got my senses back and sat up slowly. I fell asleep once the call with Hyomin ended and now here she was, standing in front of me. I didn’t even know I fell asleep that long.

            I cleared my throat before I speak, “How did you get in?” my voice sounded hoarse because I hadn’t drunk or eaten anything today.

            “You guys didn’t change the passcode and the security downstairs still remember me. You really didn’t got up from the bed today, did you?”

            I shook my head.

            “No wonder the apartment’s all dark when I came in. You haven’t eaten either?”

            I shook my head again.

            She let out an exasperated sigh, “I know you’re sad and all, but you still need to take care of yourself. Go take a shower. I’ll see if there’s anything I can make for you to eat.”

            “You don’t have to, Hyomin-ah. I don’t feel like doing anything.” 

            I was about to lie back on the bed again when she caught my arms and pulled me to sit up again.

            “Oh hell no. That’s not how you solve a problem. You had all day to mope. It’s time to do something about it. Come on, Fany-ah”

            She’s right. Taeyeon wouldn’t come home just by me being a heap on her bed like this.

            I took a warm and quick shower since I didn’t want Hyomin to wait too long.

            I went out to the living room and saw her bag, but she’s somewhere else. I checked the kitchen and she was standing in front of the stove.

            “You’re cooking?”

            She gasped and turned around, “Geez, announce your presence, please!”

            “Sorry.” I gave out an apologetic smile.

            “You guys need to grocery shopping by the way. I could only find ramyun or cereal here.”

            I grabbed a glass to drink since I was getting thirsty.

            She finished cooking the ramyun, put the pot on the dining table, and handed me a pair of chopsticks with a spoon.

            “Eat.”

            I took the utensils and sat across from her. We ate in silence and once I put the noodle on my mouth, I just realized how hungry I was.

            After we ate, Hyomin finally asked me again, “So what exactly happened?”

            I told her everything and she shook her head after I finished.

            “You should’ve known better than to put your job ahead of her.”

            “I know. But I was caught up in everything and she didn’t really say anything about it either.”

            “I’m blaming her on this matter also. Both of you are guilty.”

            “Even though she shouldn’t leave, but this mostly my fault.”

            We stayed in silence before she spoke up again, “She really didn’t contact you at all?”

            “No.” I felt like crying, “She didn’t even reply to my message.”

            “You sent her a text?”

            I nodded and kept my gaze on the table. She stood up abruptly and went to the living room.

            I followed her with confusion.

            She sat down on the couch in the living room and rummaged through her bag. She took out her cellphone and started to dial.

            “What are you doing?” 

            “Calling that stubborn midget. 3 days are a long time to clear her mind already.”

            My eyes widen, “What the?! Don’t, Hyomin-ah!”

            She ignored me and put the receiver on her ear.

            “Hang up! Right now!” I hissed.

            She put down the cellphone, “Don’t you want her to come back?”

            “I do! But you scolding her won’t do any good.” I sat down beside her.

            “Then what will make her come back to you?”

            We looked at each other without exchanging words since I didn’t know how to answer that question.

            “I don’t know.” 

            Thursday morning. I woke up with bloodshot eyes. Hyomin went home after telling me not to skip work again. One day to mope and be miserable was enough. She also told me that Taeyeon wouldn’t leave me for real, that she’s stubborn to a vault, but she loves me too much to end our relationship over things like this.

            She loves me too much? I doubted that a little bit. If she loved me too much, would she leave for days and not contacting me at all like this?

            But then again, if I loved her that much, we wouldn’t be in this situation. I wouldn’t make her feel like she didn’t have a girlfriend anymore.

            I got up lazily and dragged my feet to my room. I slept on her bed again last night. I took a shower and got ready to work. I didn’t even bother to eat breakfast or drink coffee.

            I went through today like a robot. Everything was happening without my mind really there. I didn’t feel like eating so I told Juhyun I was skipping lunch. But she insisted that I should eat since I was ‘sick’ yesterday. In the end, she bought a sandwich for me and ate with me in my room.

            The CEO even came to my room on lunchtime to check up on me. He joked about how the office was definitely different yesterday when I wasn’t here. I guessed I did spend too much time at work.

            I went home just a little bit after office hour. Some of my subordinates were still there and they looked at me with astonishment when I stepped out from the office before them. Honestly, I couldn’t care less about my subordinates these past few days.

            I got home and the emptiness of it still made me feel abandoned. Somehow I thought of it as a punishment for me. Was this what she felt for months when I came home late at night?

            I changed my clothes, took my cellphone from my bag, and went straight to her bed. Smelling her scent around me was comforting.

            I looked at my cellphone and read my previous message that didn’t get a reply. I decided to sent her a text again:

Come home to me?

            Friday. Nearing office hour was over, the office was nearly empty. I was thinking of going home early too, but the CEO came and asked if he could discuss something with me.

            I tried to push everything Taeyeon related when the CEO told me what he wanted to discuss with me. The fact that she didn’t reply again to my text last night was hurting me but I couldn’t think about that right now. He already noticed something’s not right with me on Monday. I had to be professional.

            Thankfully it went not too long and I get to go home a little bit past office hour.

            I was standing on the subway and letting my mind wander. Should I just go to Sooyoung’s place and confronted her? But what if she hadn’t calmed down yet? What if we had another huge fight and worse, in front of Sooyung and her roommate?

            A giggling noise from in front of me broke my train of thoughts. The subway was silent as usual and everybody could hear the giggling noise. I looked at the sight in front of me. It was two girls in uniform, trying to suppress their laughter that turned into a fit of giggling over something on a cellphone.

            They could be lovers, or just best friends, but it brought more pain into my open wound.

            It reminded me of Taeyeon. Everything made me think of her.

            I took out my own cellphone and sent her yet another text I was not sure would get a reply:

When are you coming home?