“Good work out, Yoona. I hope the doctor says good things about you.”, Nurse Bora said. It was the first time she ever congraulated me on something.   “Thanks. I hope you get a promotion.”, I laugh at the low chances of her having that.   She scoffs at me, but she knows that I was only kidding. I exit out of the gym, running into a tall guy. I fell, but he stood planted in his spot. He had one of the darkest eyes I had ever seen, but he didn’t seem too happy.  He frowned at me as he helped me up as if I was such a burden to lift myself up. Suddenly, he burst into a smile and walked away. What a precarious guy… I shake my head and walk to the cafeteria. Food. Again. But on my mind was Naeun.   I grabbed a tray and filled it with food. The cafeteria was more crowded now, but there were seats left. I went to my usual spot, but it was occupied for the first time. By who? By the guy that I ran into. He glared at me as I sat my tray down. Scoffing at me, He stood up quickly.   “Aren’t you eating a bit much for a girl?”, He muttered as he walked away.    I watch him for a second as he leaves the cafeteria. Was he a patient here as well? He’s not wearing the hospital gowns, but rather normal clothes for people outside of the hospital. I try to not pay attention to him, but he’s such a character. I finish my food in the cafeteria and out I go back to my room to take my medicine that Bora set for me everyday. Taking the long way, I pass Naeun’s room that is now deemed empty. She wasn’t there nor her were her parents. I didn’t know what to think or how to think so I moved on to my room a couple doors pass hers.    Opening the door, Bora sat in my bed with the pills on a tray for me to drink. They weren’t small pills, but rather the opposite. I don’t mind them much, but it’s abnormal to call it normal. I don’t greet her for a second, and I grab the pills off the tray. She stares at me stunned at my actions. I take the pills without water and whole. It was hard but I took it. Or I thought I did. Bora gives me a cup of water to down the pills since I was too crazy to think I could do it without water. I was.   “Yoona. Has something happen?”, Her voice asked me concerned for my well-being.   I shake my head, but my response was different.    “Naeun’s going through the procedure.”   Bora’s eyes dropped and she tried to remain composure, but she couldn’t. Naeun is a special kid to everyone. She makes everyone’s day brighter, but today everyone needed to hope for the best. I tried to smile to myself. Maybe It’s a good thing that she’s having surgery so she doesn’t feel pain anymore.   “I knew. Why am I so surprised?”, Bora asked me, her voice cracking.   “I don’t know.”, I said to myself, as if it was deja vu from the past.   “You knew? You knew? And you didn’t say anything?”, My dad yelled through the phone. He was talking to my mother, who was off and away. She knew about my disease, but was hesitant to say anything.   “I didn’t want it to become a reality.”, I hear her yelling as well.   “It is a reality. Snap out of it. This is not a dream that can be changed easily. Our daughter has an illness and her mother leaves her?”, He scoffed loudly.    I was hiding behind the wall, scared what they would cover up if I stood in front of my dad. He would tell me to go or change up the story. Or perhaps tell me the truth? So many things would go through my mind, but I was tired of hearing it. Everything was falling apart.   “Can you please comeback?”, He begged my mother. I could hear the sincerity in his voice.   “No.”, she was confident to say it without hesitation.   “She needs you.”, his voice quivered at the sound of her voice.   “No.”   “Why?”, He couldn’t understand her answers.   “I’m finally happy.”   Those three words broke my heart. For an eight year old, my mother was happy without me. What else could it mean? I went back inside of my room, closing the door behind me. And in the darkness, I broke. I grabbed every picture frame filled with her and I threw it on the ground. I threw it against the wall. Glass shattered, hands cut, fingers bleeding. My dad ran to my room, gasping at the mess.    “I’m sorry for being your daughter.”, I spoke gently staring at my cut hands.    My dad dropped the phone, and all I could hear from my mother was : I will visit her. Don’t you worry.   I wasn’t worried. I was afraid that she would come back and take me with her. Away from dad.   Several days later, I went back in the doctor after taking medication. His face was full of sadness and he looked uncomfortable as he laid his eyes on me. I stared right back defying him. He took a breath of air and told the news that broke my dad’s heart for a second time.   “She needs a liver transplant. She’s dying.”, He tried to be calm about the news.   Right then and there, my father’s world suddenly collapsed. He froze into place and I was left to face reality as well. If my mother didn’t care about me, if I was such a burden, why didn’t she just leave to die? I was a burden physically and financially. For the first time in my life, I wanted to die to deplete the pain I have caused because I was sick. Who was to take care of me?   I smile at Bora, trying to comfort her as best as I could. I wasn’t emotionally stable, but at least I could control it. I said my goodbyes to her, and off I went to the doctor’s office. I remember him as if it was just yesterday. But on my way there, I wanted to visit some kids and talk to them. I entered an open door, exposed and full of noisy yelling. One kid called my name, another held my hand, and many others stared at me. I smile at the attention that I wasn’t used to.   “Yoona!!!”, Taemin yelled for me. He was on the bed with his mother feeding him rice. I wave at him and he waves back with a smile full of rice.   Taemin is 6 years old. He was diagnosed with brain cancer at the age of three. His mother is a teacher and her father is a electrician. I visit them at times, but when Taemin started to have really bad problems, he relied on me. He is a cheery one  who loves the taste of purple grapes and watermelon. What he dislikes is medicine and pain. He likes a girl named Eunji.     Eunji is a year older. She’s blind, but she’s paralyzed from the waist down. Eunji is often jealous when she hears me talking to Taemin, but doesn’t admit it. I try to fix them together, but she’s too shy to admit liking him.    “Eunji.”, I said crouching next to her bed. She puts her hands on my face, feeling my facial features. She smiles and then frowns quickly.    “What’s wrong?”, Taemin yells from afar.   “Yeah.”, I agree with him.   “I like Taemin.”, She said aloud.   Taemin gasps quickly looking at his mom, me, and back at Eunji. He runs to her bed and takes her hand, smiling like a fool. Did i just….fix them up….kids style? I take a step back and watch the cute moment in front of me. Eunji touches Taemin’s nose and smiles. Then, suddenly I feel a tug on my shirt. I look down and it was only Wendy. Wendy is Eunji’s sister. She’s fine, but she likes being with her sister so she claims she’s sick as well. It’s the only way to suppress the pain she saids.   “Yoona.”, She stretches her arms so I would pick her up. She looks at her happy sister for a while and then looks at me. Pinching my cheek as if she was my grandma, she saids nothing and wanted to be set down. I laugh yo myself as I set her free from my grip.    “Thank you, Yoona,”, Taemin smiled at me only to be hit by Eunji, who immediately felt sorry afterwards.   “No problem. Cherish her.”   “I will. I want to marry her when I’m older.”, He proclaimed. His mother looked on, tearing up at his words. Truth is, doctor said he wasn’t going to live long. His time is dwindling by the second and his mother wanted him to see the world. If I was her mother, I would run away with him until he was happy. But he seemed happy where was at.   I decided that I had taken too much time for the kids and exited out the room to go to my dreading appointment. I was going to be deemed late as always if I didn’t arrive earlier than usual. Dr. Choi has grown and has now gotten slower in speed. It was only yesterday when he took me in the hospital and told me that everything was going to be fine. Right before entering his office, I entered that boy again. He was smiling this time, waving at everyone who passed by him. That was odd. Wasn’t he just….nevermind. I shake my head to get rid of the unneccessary thoughts and entered in the room.   Doctor Choi was busy at his computer when He saw me come into his office. He had a smile on his face as always. We have known each other for twelve years and he has watched me grow up.