When Lines are Blurred and Boundaries are Ignored

Looking at You

Luhan wakes up to the sound of his phone alarm. He blindly reaches out for his phone and shuts the alarm off before stretching his limbs. The feel of the hard floor is familiar to him since high school. Whenever he sleeps over at Minseok’s house, he takes the futon laid out on the floor because the elder’s not that comfortable with the idea of sharing his bed with anyone. As much as Luhan would want to, he respects Minseok’s choices of course. 

Right now he’s on Minseok’s dorm room’s floor which might as well be his dorm. If only the Housing and Dormitories officials let him be roommates with Minseok then he does not have to settle on the floor thrice a week. Not to mention he would get to spend a lot more time with the elder that way.

He looks to his right and sees Minseok’s face, still asleep as if the loud blaring sound of his alarm did not happen. He chuckles as he sees dried drool on the male’s face. He sits up then brings his face closer to Minseok’s, observing his features. Luhan’s really amused at how peaceful Minseok looks like when he’s asleep. The furrowed eyebrows which are a constant whenever Minseok tries to work on some class requirements or he’s confused on some of the lessons are absent. Instead, a calm expression fills Minseok's face.

He traces his index finger on the male’s forehead, careful not to touch too hard else Minseok wakes up. He smiles as Minseok’s long lashes create a shadow on his lids, awed at how beautiful and handsome and cute and overall wonderful Minseok looks like. Though Minseok always feel insecure of his lack of double eyelids, Luhan cherishes that one feature the most because it makes Minseok’s eyes look much prettier. But he never says that out loud, afraid Minseok would freak out. His finger goes to the male’s nose down to his philtrum. He lets his finger linger on the male’s upper lip then makes its way down to the chin. Luhan heaves a sigh as he thinks of all the possible outcomes if he confesses.

Luhan would admit. It’s so hard to be so close to that special person but not close enough as you would want to be. Sometimes he would have these thoughts of confessing but backs out at the last minute. The words “I love you, and not just as a friend,” at the tip of his tongue swallowed. This would be the case especially if Minseok meets new people. Luhan would be on full defensive mode but thrives not to be too obvious in case Minseok notices. It’s hard, Luhan thinks, but for Minseok, it’s all worth it.

There is that best possible outcome which would be Minseok reciprocating his feelings. But for the past years, no matter how Luhan pushed their friendship’s boundaries, Minseok just let it be and treats Luhan the way Luhan treats him. This leads to confusion on Luhan’s part. He’s far from sure on where he stands in Minseok’s heart. The other outcome, of course, would be Minseok not reciprocating his feelings. And when worse comes to worst, Minseok would avoid him and get angry at him. Because of this, Luhan is still afraid of the risk. It’s already hard to imagine without an interaction with Minseok. How much more if he knows that the elder resents him. 

It takes at least about ten minutes before Minseok wakes up. He’s not surprised anymore when he sees Luhan staring at his face when he opens his eyes. He freaked out when it happened the first time sometime during their junior year in high school but years of knowing Luhan made him get used to it.

“Creep,” Minseok says as he flicks Luhan’s forehead, voice croaking from dryness.

“Yah, I’m not,” Luhan defends as he pulls Minseok’s upper body towards him for a hug. “Good morning Seok-ah,” he says directly near the elder’s ear. He feels that satisfaction when he notices the slight shivering of the other male. 

“Good morning. Now let me go, I have to take a shower, we only have half an hour. Go back to your room,” Minseok shrugs Luhan’s arms away and makes his way to the bathroom.

“Yeah, yeah. What’s for today?” 

“Just plain black,” Minseok answers.

“Alright, see you,” Luhan says, tapping Minseok’s before the elder disappears behind the bathroom door. He smiles as he hears a small yelp.


***

Their class is done for the day. It’s not a coincidence that they almost have the same schedule despite having different majors. Luhan may or may not have peeked at Minseok’s tentative timetable plan before arranging his own.

“Coffee?” Luhan asks as they walk towards their university’s gate.

“I think I had too much this morning,” Minseok shakes his head as he tries to come up with anything other than hanging out at a cafe to do. It’s Friday and despite the nagging thoughts that there are still things needed to be completed, they both agree that some unwinding is good to release some stress.

“Movies? Guardians of the Galaxy just started showing yesterday,” Luhan suggests, crossing his fingers. He definitely checked the cinema’s online site last night just to be sure.

Minseok contemplates for a second before nodding. Luhan mentally rejoices.

***


Minseok and Luhan settle on their seats just as the theater light dims. 

“Do not fall asleep,” Luhan warns in a playful tone. He gets elbowed in the ribs in return.

“I won’t,” Minseok replies.

“Yeah, yeah,” Luhan says as he raises the arm rest between them. He puts his left arm on Minseok’s shoulders, the action like a reflex whenever he’s beside the male. Minseok does not shrug it off but scoots a bit closer towards Luhan and rests his head on his shoulder.

Luhan is not exaggerating when he says that he’s definitely melting inside.

They remain in that position for the whole duration of the movie. Luhan feeds Minseok some popcorn occasionally and brings the soda’s straw near the elder boy’s lips, assuming that he's thirsty. Luhan being attentive to Minseok’s wants and need is a routine. Luhan dislikes routine but if it concerns Minseok then he does not really mind.

Luhan would lie if he says he knows what happened in the movie. He just stares as Minseok spurts his rants and comments about the movie but because Luhan did not really watch it, he just nods and smiles whenever he thinks it’s good timing. Minseok, on the other hand, is not really offended. He’s used to Luhan’s silence whenever he speaks his opinions especially about a movie they just saw. 

Luhan links his arms with Minseok as he continues to listen to the older boy.


***

They still end up at a cafe and was surprised to spot their friends Kyungsoo, Chanyeol and Yixing there.

Chanyeol raises his hand and gestures for them to join their table.

“Where were you?” Kyungsoo asks as they both take their seats. Chanyeol automatically changes seats as the two vacant ones were the two on his both sides. He knows he’ll be shoved out anyway. He’s just saving his arm from any minor bruises considering that Luhan always finds a way to sit beside Minseok.

“Movies,” Minseok answers just as Luhan stands up after setting his bag down and looks at Minseok.

“Just hot choco,” Minseok says at Luhan with a small smile.

“Okay, be right back,” Luhan goes to the counter to place their orders.

Luhan and Minseok going to the movies with just the two of them is old news to their friends. They pretty much do it at least once or twice a month.

Kyungsoo and Chanyeol are their friends since high school. Yixing, on the other hand, became their friend at the start of their freshman year in the university as Luhan and him have the same majors. That, and Yixing is also Minseok's roommate. Call it small world or what but sometimes, some things are just meant to happen. Whether Yixing feels weird or whatever about them, he never raised his thoughts about it.

“Guardians?” Yixing asks as he takes a sip of his coffee.

“Yep,” Minseok says as he swings his feet slowly, back fully rested on the chair. No one would argue if someone says Minseok looks way younger than his age. Sometimes, he even acts like it. But because of his cute features, he never gets weird looks from strangers. They probably assume that he's the youngest among their group of friends. If only they knew.

“Oh! You should have said so! I was wondering who to go with,” Chanyeol says as he puts both his hands on each of Minseok’s shoulders and shakes the older boy a bit.

“Yah!” comes Luhan’s voice as he balances the tray on his hands. Chanyeol drops his hands immediately and makes a fake pout.

“It was just sudden though. Don’t worry, I’m sure Jongin would watch with you later. He’s been talking about it since last month,” Minseok says, getting his hot chocolate from Luhan.

Luhan retrieves the cup from Minseok and starts blowing on it to cool it off a bit before giving it back to Minseok. The elder smiles at him in return and Luhan beams back.

“Really? I must text him then,” Chanyeol starts typing on his phone to message Jongin.

The four remain quiet as they indulge on their hot drinks when Yixing’s phone vibrates.

“Oh?” he says with a smile then taps the screen to receive the call.

“Yifan-ge!” Yixing says, voice laced with excitement from talking to his long-time friend who’s currently in China.

The mention of an unfamiliar name somehow gets the attention of the other people in the table.

Yixing starts talking in Chinese and since majority of them cannot really understand (they can’t even eavesdrop even if they want to, except Luhan of course), they just settle for small talk. Minseok teases Chanyeol by trying to reveal some spoilers about the movie. Chanyeol protests by covering his ears and chanting “blah blah blah” in his deep voice nonstop.

They stop their bickering when Yixing claps his hand, a bright smile evident on his face. All of them looks at him expectantly, waiting for whatever his news is.

“Yifan-ge’s half brother will be going to our university next semester,” Yixing says excitedly. Not minding the puzzled looks of his friends.

“It’s Shixun! The one I’ve been talking about who wants to get to our university’s dance program?”

Looks of recognition fill their faces. They have heard Yixing say that name for the past months and it does not take a genius to see that Yixing adored the boy.

“Oh! Right! Then he’ll be in the same college as ours?” Luhan says and Yixing nods his head.

“When will he be arriving?” Kyungsoo asks as he slices a bit from his cinnamon bread.

“Yifan-ge says Shixun will be here a week before next semester,” Yixing shrugs as he starts to drift off in his own mind. Yixing has the tendency to be like this even if they are in the middle of a conversation. They thought of it as rude at first but now they only find it so adorable.


***

Since it’s Friday, Yixing’s not surprised anymore when Luhan trails after them to their dorm. A Friday means Luhan would definitely sleep over. No ifs and buts there. 

“Seok-ah, help me with our Humanities paper please?” Luhan whines as he goes straight to Minseok’s bed, flopping down the mattress as if it is his.

“Have you started with anything yet?” Minseok asks, shoving Luhan lightly to drop his things.

“Mmmm...not yet,” Luhan grins at him.

Minseok shakes his head, muttering “Seriously, you always wait for the last minute to do things.”

“Not last minute! There’s still a few days before it’s due! You just do everything in advance. I’m the normal one here,” Luhan shrugs as he pulls Minseok to sit across him on the bed. He crosses his legs and starts fishing out his materials and references out of his bag.

Minseok pushes him off the bed with his feet. “Get on the floor instead. I don’t want too much clutter on my bed.”

Luhan pouts but still complies, choosing to roll off the bed then snatching his things to start working on the floor. He hears Yixing let out a small chuckle.

It’s almost an hour after they started working on their papers when Minseok notices that the sound of keyboard typing is now gone. Looking on the floor, he chuckles as he sees Luhan on his stomach, sound asleep in front of his laptop. Minseok gathers Luhan’s things and gets the extra futon.

“Need some help?” Yixing offers when he notices the sleeping Luhan.

“Yes, please,” Minseok groans as he tries to roll Luhan a bit to the side so he can lay out the futon. Yixing clambers off his bed then helps him arrange everything before carrying Luhan, careful not to wake him up.

Minseok gets his extra blanket, the one Luhan uses every time he sleeps over and lays it on Luhan.

“Tch, not even an hour and you’re already sleeping,” Minseok comments, shaking his head then starts preparing for bed. It’s not even 10PM but he’s really tired. This week’s been pretty stressful and the most sleep he got was five hours. It’s definitely time to get extra Z's tonight.

Minseok settles on his bed and readies for sleep. But his breathing did not get even until an hour later.


***

Minseok wakes up to Luhan’s face like usual. Luhan’s looking at him as if he’s an interesting display on a museum.

He flicks Luhan’s forehead and gets hugged in return. “Good morning Seok-ah,” Luhan says and the automatic shivering of his body occurs. 

Call it a routine, a habit or a reflex. Anything actually goes.

***

It is the start of the new semester and Luhan feels energized. He spent their two-week vacation the way he wants to. 

He spent one whole week with his family in Beijing (Minseok even stayed for two days) and afterwards went back to Korea to stay with Minseok’s family.  His ideal vacation indeed.

His whole family used to stay in Korea until his high school senior year but chose to go back to China when he started university. Luhan, of course, chose to stay in Korea.

Right now he’s walking the elder to his first class (needless to say, he accidentally saw the elder’s timetable yet again), coffee in right hand and Minseok’s books in his left.

They say goodbye once they reach the right room and Luhan dashes to his first class which is located at the opposite building of Minseok’s. The things he do for Kim Minseok. 

He makes it on time for his class, or to be more specific, a "rehearsal" type of class. They all sit on the dance studio floor as their instructor distributes their tentative rehearsal and events calendar for the semester. He notices Yixing on his side who is practically bouncing with nervousness.

“Yah, stop vibrating will you,” Luhan chides as he elbows the younger.

“I can’t. Shixun’s here Luhan and he’s probably lost in the hallways or something right now,” Yixing whispers as they feign interest on what their instructor is saying.

“Shixun? Your friend’s brother?” 

“Half-brother,” Yixing points out, “And yes, that’s him,” he adds.

“Why would he be lost? Didn’t you give him a tour or something? He arrived a few days ago right?” Luhan asks.

“I did give him a tour...of Seoul but not our university,” Yixing pouts at his failure.

Luhan snickers. “Eyy, don’t worry about him too much. He’s a big kid. He could handle himself,” he convinces as he tries to focus and keep up with whatever is going on.

“I hope so,” Yixing says as he tries to do the same.


***

Luhan is surprised when Yixing suddenly runs towards someone once they get out of the dance studio.

“Shixun!” Yixing hugs the taller male. Luhan feels it’s very safe to assume this is the infamous Shixun Yixing never shuts up about.

“Lu-ge! Come here,” Yixing motions for him to come closer and he complies.

“Lu-ge, this is Shixun. Shixun, this is Lu-ge,” Yixing introduces.

“Hello, I’m Shixun. But you can also call me Sehun,” the taller male says in straight (and unaccented) Korean as he bows.

“Oh, hello Shixun! I’m Luhan, it’s nice to finally meet you. Yixing would not shut up about you,” Luhan says as he gives a bow in return. He notices Yixing slightly redden at his statement and an amused expression on Sehun’s face.

“I figured. He also won’t shut up about his friends here,” Sehun replies and shares a laugh with Luhan. Yixing huffs in protest and pouts.

“Yah, let’s go. The cafeteria might get too crowded,” the pouting male says as he holds Sehun and Luhan in their wrists and pulls them to the direction of the cafeteria.


***

Luhan bounces on his steps once he spots Minseok already seated on a table with Chanyeol and Kyungsoo.

“Minseok-ah~” he singsongs as he drops his bag on the seat beside Minseok and proceeds to give a one-arm hug to the other male.

Minseok hums and touches his arm for a second in recognition of his presence. The elder then drops the book he is holding and is about to stand up when he comes face to face with Yixing and an unfamiliar male.

“Everyone! This is Shixun!” Yixing announces.

“Hello, I’m Shixun,” he says as he gives a 90-degree bow.

“Hello Su- Saw, Sau.. Uh hello,” Chanyeol says, stuttering on how to pronounce the other’s name.

“You can just call me Sehun. That’s my real name actually,” Sehun says as he beams at them.

“You’re Korean?!” Luhan blurts. That explains his unaccented Korean.

“Do I not look like one?” Sehun replies, amused at the older male’s shocked expression.

“He is, Lu-ge. His mom’s Korean and he stayed here in Korea ‘till he was 13 before migrating to Changsha,” Yixing explains as he motions for Sehun to take one of the vacant seats. A collective “Oh~” is heard in their table upon the explanation.

They exchange further greetings and afterwards Luhan grabs Minseok’s hand and proceeds to file in line for one of the food stalls. He stays at Minseok's back, hands wrapped around Minseok’s shoulders as if he’s giving the elder a back hug. Minseok does not shrug it off. He never does.

***

“Will you just finish your work first before drifting in to your own world?” Minseok points out as he frowns at Luhan who has been staring at him for the past five minutes.

It’s only been three days since the start of the semester but Minseok’s professors are already ruthless in giving them reading assignments. On the other hand, Luhan’s practically free since rehearsals do not officially start next week. He needs to do some reading in his other subjects but he knows he can do that later. His load is definitely lighter than Minseok who majors in Economics.

“I have no work to do though,” Luhan counters, standing up from his seat across Minseok and chooses to take a seat beside the elder instead. He snakes his arms to the elder’s waist, effectively encasing the male in his arms.

“Ah, so squishy. I really love hugging you Seok-ah,” Luhan says, eyes closed in bliss. He nuzzles his face to the other's neck and smiles as he smells the other male’s natural scent. “I really love you too,” he adds in his thought.

Minseok just hums, not giving any verbal reply.

They stay like that for a few minutes when Luhan’s phone vibrates in his pocket.

“Who the heck is this,” Luhan thinks as he taps his phone screen.

‘Lu-ge help please. I don’t really know where I am right now? >////<’
 
Luhan reads silently and he jolts in alarm. It’s from Sehun. 

Yixing has been busy for the past days since he’s one of the appointed choreographers for one of their productions. He told Luhan to keep an eye on Sehun since Sehun’s not been in Korea since he was thirteen. The younger got lost a few times the previous days and Luhan always came to the male’s rescue.

“I need to go Seok-ah,” Luhan reaches for his bag on the table and drops his things in it carelessly.

“Why? Is there a problem?” Minseok says in a worried tone. Luhan rarely leaves him alone unless it’s because of different class schedules or during the (very) rare times they do not hang out or study together.

“Nope, everything’s okay. It’s just Shixun,” Luhan says, tapping Minseok’s cheeks to comfort him.

“Lost again?” Minseok furrows his eyebrows in concern.

“Yep. Don’t worry I’ll be back, okay? Do not move from this spot. I’ll walk you back once I find him. Understand?” Luhan says as he slings his bag to his right shoulder.

“Yes Mr. Lu, now go. The poor kid must be waiting for you now,” Minseok smiles then waves him goodbye.

Hours later, Minseok is the last one to come out of the library with no Luhan in sight. 

He walks to his dorm room alone.

 

 

 

Hello! I just want to say thank you again for subscribing. I hope you like this chapter. Next update would be in two or three days I promise. Thank you! :)

 

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Comments

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Xiuhanisloveok #1
Chapter 7: I actually reread this fic a few times bc I LOVE THIS one so much ! Love your writing style,the characterizations and everything! Reading the same thing from both and luhan and minseok's pov was amazing, it helps to understand their feeling more and it's beautiful ! Also i just realized this had a school 2013 reference haha
adrabblemaker
#2
Hi, there. I might not know you and you might not know me either. But I know that once upon a time, this fic made me smile and brought me happiness. Thank you so much foe sharing this with us. This is one of the fics that stuck in my head because it's so memorable. The cuteness is just asdfghjkl. If I might say, this fic is so xiuhan, fluffy and naive in a good way. I wish to get to know you better tho. Happy Author Appreciation Day! ^^

Love,
adrabblemaker
icytoes
27 streak #3
Chapter 9: Definitely one of my favorite xiuhan stories.
London9Calling
#4
Gahhhh what a cute fic. Thank you for writing this ❤❤
sehunharu
#5
Chapter 8: this is so beautiful fic omg my xiuhan feeling all over in my heart..lol I love this so much!!!
venomboy17 #6
Chapter 9: You are always welcome. I'll be looking forward to the spin-off series. Hehehehe Fighting! :D
venomboy17 #7
Chapter 8: The bonus chap is awesome as always. hahaha. Fluffy in all the right places (whatever that means. hahaha) Thank you authornim for writing such a great fic :D
venomboy17 #8
Chapter 7: This is so good. Hahaha A very good Xiuhan fic. Off to read the spin off and the bonus chapter now. Its a good thing I found this hahaha
azeleepri
#9
Chapter 8: OMFG!! someone save me here. i'm basically melting! and i just can't stop squealing all over again with this fic. ohgawd~ i wish you can write more bonus chapters for this. i'd die happy. LOL :D
danigeo71727
#10
This was such a cute story! Minseok and Luhan were so oblivious but adorably so!