That was the only word the two boys could think of to describe their relationship status. 

 

It was almost like a paradox within their two lives. Both knew what happened last night but didn't tell the other believing the other didn't know. 

 

But they did.

 

Jonghyun would laugh nervously and chew on his lip idly whenever Kibum would speak to him.

 

Kibum would smile politely and nod whenever Jonghyun made a general comment about today's chores. It was killing Kibum inside because he knew the elder felt guilty. He just didn't know how to go about it. Wouldn't it be weird if you forgave your boyfriend for cheating on you so easily with yourself? 

 

It was a tangled web of lies and secrets that piled into one massive bomb, slowly ticking away until it would all explode in Kibum's face. One day Jonghyun will find out and Kibum could do nothing about its ultimate outcome. He was sure the elder would feel all sorts of rage and betrayal. So he stood and wondered in the middle of the field, was creating the Zorro even worth it? 

 

The more he thought about it the more absurd the idea grew. It was for revenge for his parents, but was it really accomplishing anything at all? Kibum's parents weren't magically back from the dead or anything like that. 

 

But then he thought of the things he got out of being the Zorro. 

 

He had helped a great deal of people. Taemin is alive and well thanks to Kibum's rescue and although Jonghyun's relationship with the taller boy was a bit complex it blossomed from it. There were pros and cons to every decision he had made thus far, but how he would keep up with every little lie was beyond him. 

 

Jonghyun slowly stopped showing up where the Zorro was. That alone raised a red flag that something was terribly wrong. It seems everyone knew something was wrong, but Kibum. 

 

Jonghyun stopped smiling.

 

He stopped blabbing away.

 

He stopped waking up early.

 

He stopped caring about the Zorro.

 

Yet Kibum never asked why and he hated himself for it. The radiant boy was decaying to a dull grey and loosing himself yet Kibum idly watched for a reason unknown to himself. They talked like nothing was wrong which killed the younger boy the most. There's something beyond what happened days ago in the train cart. Something way more. 

 

A few days ago on the last day Jonghyun came to look for him in his black disguise. He had said: I bet you're tired of seeing me.

 

When Kibum blandly said he enjoyed his company Jonghyun smiled sadly. He felt like Kibum was lying to him so he wouldn't feel bad. In his mind, he was a barrier, almost a magnet, made of pity. That was the last thing Jonghyun wanted. 

 

I just wanted to let you know I won't be bothering you anymore. I really admire you, but I'm only burden to you. I hope we cross paths again, he said with an empty voice.

 

Kibum stood by the shed of farming tools, hand resting on the door. He sighed deeply and hung his head, muttering a string of cursed under his breath. He started moving the woven baskets inside the shed so Mr. Lee could sort them out into crates later. 

 

"Kibum..." A familiar voice uttered his name as he was organizing the baskets of fluffy white cotton.

 

Jonghyun looked visibly tired. His eyes had darkened and his lips forming a permanent, neutral expression. He had cut his hair recently and suited him nicely. 

 

"Yes?"

 

"I'm leaving."

 

Kibum felt his whole world crash down on him in an instant.

 

His eyes nearly bulged out of his head, "What? Leaving where?!"

 

"Dunno...somewhere I guess. I just wanted to let you know since... Well, you know." the older boy shrugged unaffected by the younger boy's horrified expression.

 

 

Leaving? How could he just decide to randomly go and leave Kibum behind?! The level of his calmness irritated him. How does one randomly decide to leave and their boyfriend nonetheless!

 

"But, why? Did I do something wrong? Do you not want to be near me anymore do you not like me--?!"

 

Jonghyun raised his hand and cut him off, "No no, you have nothing to do with it. Kibum, you're amazing. I'm just not good for you. I'm not good for anyone here really so... I'm leaving. I...I wanna find my dad."

 

"Your dad?! Excuse me, the same one who left you without notice? Jonghyun are you insane?! You nearly got killed the last time you went out on your own! Do you really want to spend your time looking for a man who abandoned you? What if something happens to you on the way? You're lucky that the Zorro brought you and Taemin back that night you were kidnapped or you've surely would've gotten lost again!" Kibums words tumbled out like word vomit, once started it can't be stopped. Jonghyun didn't flinch.

 

Oh no, he laughed.

 

He uttered such a dark chuckle that it made Kibum's skin crawl. 

 

"What's so funny?" Kibum demanded.

 

"I never told you the Zorro walked me home." Jonghyun smiled for the first time in days. 

 

Thus began Kibum's fatal mistake.

 

Jonghyun continued, "Somehow you both have the same scar on your eyebrow when you first moved in and crashed into the flower pot."

 

Kibum's heart collapsed into his stomach and suddenly felt like he was going to throw up. Jonghyun knew. The bomb had finally trickled down to zero and exploded right in his face.

 

"H-How long...?"

 

"Two days after the train cart. I tell ya, when I figured out that it was you I had with I felt so dumb. It was eating me alive, Kibum. I thought I had cheated on you deliberately, but I didn't have to worry. Still, I feel extremely stupid and naive to have gone through all the trouble. The man I admired and loved so much was sleeping in the same bed as me every night and I had no idea." Jonghyun paused and studied Kibum's face. He appeared as though he might break down and minute. 

 

"Are you still leaving then?" Kibum asked in a hushed voice, fighting the swelling of his throat as tears built up in his eyes. 

 

"No, I'm not leaving. I got what I wanted out of you. It's a little method Minho taught me that they use down at the sheriff's station. Reverse psychology I think it's called?"

 

"So you lied about leaving so I would admit I'm the Zorro?"

 

"Bingo."

 

A single tear rolled down Kibum's cheek as he let out a pathetic whimper. His fists tightened till his knuckles were ghastly white and trembled. 

 

Kibum took a step forward and punched Jonghyun in the chest. He was well aware it didn't hurt considering he had cement for a chest, but it felt good to strike the older boy. So he did it again and again, beating on his chest babbling incoherent things as he sobbed. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jonghyun grabbed Kibum's wrists to stop him. For the first time in days he saw a spark of color in his droopy eyes. It was small, but still there. 

 

"I'm not mad at you, 'Bum. I was at first, but I realized I got involved in something I shouldn't have to begin with. I made a mess of things yet you still sheltered me from the truth like it was your fault for wanting to be the Zorro. In the end it was my curiosity and persistence that ruined everything. So, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for making your life one crazy train ride as if you life didn't enough." Jonghyun pulled Kibum into a tight embrace, holding him like a fragile child. His arms were like a shield from the outside world to Kibum.

 

He found comfort and security in the warmth of Jonghyun's chest. That's when Kibum realized why he fell so hard for that boy and why he tried so hard to protect him from his real identity. He loved him way more than he had let himself recognize. Jonghyun was no child and certainly much older than him, but he couldn't shake the urge to keep him protected like a mother with her child. 

 

"Do you still love me then?" Kibum mumbled into Jonghyun's chest. 

 

"Kibum I always have. Zorro or not you're still Kibum. Just because you have a mask on doesn't make you a different person." He lifted Kibum's chin and looked into his eyes. He mentally placed a black mask over his eyes.

 

Undoubtably, his beloved Zorro and Kibum were the same person. Same pouty lips, sharp eyes, scarred eyebrows, and defined jaw. Of course he kissed him then. Hell, they already went all the way together wether they realized it right away or not. Jonghyun didn't picture his first relationship this way, but he's glad it happened despite all the bumps in the road along the way. 

 

"We're no better than Jinki and Minho are we?"

 

"No... No we're not."