They arrived back at the apartment but while Micha was happy, Himchan was struggling with a decision. As he watched her examine her new toy, he knew fighting was one of those things that parents should address. Yet here he was, again, at a loss as to how. Especially since it involved her mother.
"Hey Micha," he said as he sat on the couch next to her. "Can we talk about what happened?"
The smile instantly left her face, making him feel guilty for bringing it up.
"You're not in trouble." he hurriedly assured her. "I just... I mean... You know fighting is bad right?"
"Yeah." she replied and looked up at him. "So I'm not in trouble?"
"No." he assured her again. "You did the right thing but don't think that you can just punch anyone you want."
She gave him a curious look. "So it's good that I punched him?"
"Uh... Well... No..." he stuttered in surprise at her question. "I... I meant..." He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. "I just mean... Sometimes it's okay to fight but that doesn't make it good."
Now she looked confused as she raised an eyebrow at him. "I don't understand."
"Maybe I shouldn't have said anything." he thought with a lot of regret.
"Most of the time fighting is bad." he tried to explain. "There are just some very rare times that it's okay to fight. The important thing is, don't go around and punch people just cause you want to. That is very, very bad."
She thoughtfully nodded her head for a few seconds before looking at him again. "So only when they say bad stuff about mommy?"
He stared at her in disbelief for a moment before a chuckle rose out of him. "Okay, we'll go with that." he agreed with a smile.
She turned away and frowned. "Stupid boy. He says bad stuff about mommy and I'll punch him again."
"Please let her never see that kid at the park again." he silently begged.

Then he steered the conversation away from the boy. "You like your new toy?" he asked her.
"Yes!" She declared, smiling again. She bounced the stuff animal on her lap happily.
"This is going to act as your new pillow. That way you can take it everywhere for you." he told him.
She blinked at him and then looked at the animal curiously.
"Go ahead. Try it." he encouraged.
She pressed her lips together before holding the toy up. She buried her face in its belly and let out a muffled scream. Then she held it out and grinned before hugging it. "Thank you." she said.
"You're welcome." he replied, pleased that it would work for her to release stress. "What are you going to name them?" he inquired. Then he playfully nudged her. "You're not going to name them Micha are you?"
She giggled and shook her head. "No."
"That's good." he said teasingly. "What kind of name is Micha anyways?"
"It's your name." she answered without hesitation.
That startled him and he stared at her in surprise. "What?"
"That's what mommy says." she told him nonchalantly.
He eyed her as he debated with himself again. Then he swallowed, hoping the question wouldn't cause her any distress. "What... What did she say?"
"She says..." She trailed off while scrunching up her face. It was obvious that she was concentrating really hard. "You have the... 'h' and the 'n'. Cause you're the..." She tilted her head thoughtfully. "You're the... The start and the end!" she finished with a little yell, happy that she remembered it.
"Oh. Okay." he uttered before turning away, thinking about that revelation. He had the 'h' and the 'n' because he was the start and the end.
"Well the first part is easy enough." he thought. 'Himchan' without the 'h' and the 'n' made 'Imcha'. Rearrange the letters and you get 'Micha'. But what did the second part mean?
He swallowed and forced a smile on his face. "Why don't you clean up and I'll make you a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch?"
"Okay." she said and hopped off the couch to go to the bathroom.
He went to the kitchen and quickly made lunch for her before setting it on the table. Then she sat on the chair and ate, oblivious to everything else.
Instead of making himself something to eat, he went back to the living room and over to the bookshelf. He checked to make sure she was still occupied before sitting on the floor and pulling out an old photo album. He flipped a few pages and found the section he wanted.
Smiling up at him from the photo was his ex-girlfriend from all those years ago. Micha's mother. He couldn't help but smile as well at her expression.
Below the photo was a postcard with the image of the school she was studying at. He slipped it out of the sleeve and turned it over, reading the little scribbled note.
"Hey Beauty!" He suppressed a chuckle at his old nickname that he got from her, despite her teasing him about wanting to be a model. "I thought you might be worried about me so here is this. I made it safely! And I promise to study hard. Can't wait to see your pictures in magazines. I'll buy all of them."
He remembered the day he received this in the mail. It was only a couple of weeks after they had ended their relationship, promising to part as friends. He had sent her a postcard back but after that, he never heard from her again. Then life happened and he never thought to send her any more.
As he traced his thumb over the word 'Beauty', he felt his heart sink a little. Rearranging the letters in his name wasn't the only wordplay she had done. For all intents and purposes, the name 'Micha' meant beautiful girl. However, it was formed by combining the words 'beautiful' and 'daughter'. 'Beautiful daughter'. She named her 'Beauty's daughter'.
He looked at the picture of the woman again and sighed. "Why didn't you tell me?" he questioned in a hushed whisper.
"That's mommy."
He jumped, breaking out of his thoughts, and quickly looked at Micha. She was standing next to him and staring down at the photo album.
"Uh... yeah." he said and glanced at the picture. "I... Uh..."
"Do you love mommy?" she asked him.
His mouth opened and closed on its own as he stared at her. "Um... I... I uh..." He wasn't sure how to exactly answer that question. Their relationship never went that far. It didn't even last very long. He looked at the picture once more, trying to think of what to say. Of course, if they never had broken up, what would have happened? And even if they had, what would have happened if she told him about being pregnant? "I... I suppose I did." he finally answered. "In my own way."
She seemed satisfied with that answer as she nodded her head. "I love mommy lots." she stated while hugging her stuff animal tightly.
"I know." he sadly said. An idea came to him then and he pulled out the picture. "Do you want this?"
She bit her lip before shaking her head. "No, it's okay. You need it more." she said while smiling at him.
He chuckled and nodded while glancing at the photo. "Yeah. Thanks."
"You're welcome." she replied. "Can I watch cartoons."
At her ability to change the conversation so quickly, he chuckled again. He put the picture and postcard back in their sleeves before putting the album back on the shelf. Then he turned cartoons on for her.

As he carried her plate to the kitchen, his phone started ringing and he answered it. "Hello."
"Hello Kim Himchan? This is Park Eunkyung. The lawyer."
"Oh, yes. Hello." he said as he gently put the sink in the sink. "Micha is doing fine if that's what your worried about." He picked up the dish rag and went back to the table to wipe it.
"That's great to hear." she replied. "I was actually calling to let you know that her grandparents are here."
He stopped cleaning the table, feeling his heart skip a beat. "They... They are?" he questioned. He turned and looked at Micha. She was sitting on the couch and giggling at the cartoon on the television. "It hasn't been a week yet."
"They changed their schedule so they could fly in this morning." she explained to him. "They've finished handling the rest of their daughter's estate and now they're heading over there for Micha. They should be there shortly. Is it a bad time?"
"Oh." he mindlessly uttered, staring at the little girl. "Uh... No. It's.. okay. Th-thank you."
He hung up the phone and set it on the table. This was the moment he had been waiting for but now that it was here, he felt a bit numb about it. He turned back to Micha, taking in every detail about her. Her hair that was already tangled again. Her tiny arms that were hugging her stuff animal still. And her smile that seemed to brighten her face whenever she giggled.
She must have noticed him looking at her because she turned her head and met his gaze. "What?"
He wasn't prepared for the question and he stuttered a bit. Then he sighed heavily and forced himself to get it over with. "It's your grandparents." he told her. "They're on their way to get you."
"Oh." she said, surprise in her voice.
He swallowed and glanced around the apartment, seeing all the toys scattered everywhere. "We should see about gathering up your stuff." he said. "I'll even help you."
"Okay." she replied and carefully set her stuff animal aside.
Working as a team, they made sure all her toys and clothes ended up in their respective bags. Then he brushed her hair again after promising to be careful, trying to make her presentable.

When they heard the knock on the door, he felt his stomach drop. He didn't let it show on his face though as he smiled at her. Then he went and answered the door. The couple entered the apartment and looked around.
"Hello. I'm Kim Himchan." he told them and politely offered his hand.
"Yes." the woman said, eyeing him. "We know who you are." Then she turned and looked at the little girl on the couch, ignoring his hand shake. "And you must be Micha."
The coldness from her surprised him as he dropped his hand. With how vibrant and lively their daughter had been, he was expecting something different. Then he reflected on the words she had directed towards Micha. "You've never met her before?"
"No, this is our first time." the grandfather answered. He kept glancing between Himchan and Micha, as if he was trying to find a resemblance between the two.
"Look, let's drop the false pleasantries and get everything out in the open." the grandmother said, facing Himchan once more.
"What pleasantries?" he questioned but kept silent.
"As far as we are concerned, you're just the man who got out daughter pregnant and left her to raise the child by herself." she told him.
His mouth dropped open slightly at that proclamation. "I... I didn't know." he uttered in his defense.
"No but I'm sure you can imagine the shame it brought to our family." she continued. "Having an illegitimate child." She swallowed as if the very idea made her sick. "Even when we managed to find suitors willing to overlook..." She side-eyed Micha. "The problem... our daughter refused them all."
Himchan narrowed his eyes a little. "That's not Micha's fault." he declared, even more defensive.
She gave a small nod. "Yes, that is true. The blame for everything was the only thing we agreed on and that would be you."
"Me?" he questioned and raised an eyebrow.
"She said her life ended when she met you and I couldn't agree more." the woman elaborated.
That hit Himchan like a punch in the gut. He tried to imagine the girl he had dated saying those words but he couldn't. Or was he just thinking too much? As he turned his head to stare at Micha, he wondered even more about his ex-girlfriend. Did she harbor bad feelings for him because of this child? Was that want the second part of the riddle meant? How he was the start and the end... The end of her life?
"We've hired a moving service to pack up our daughter's belongings and ship them." the grandfather informed him. "They should be by in a few days for Micha's..." He looked at the bags in the corner. "Things. We've already hired people to set up a bedroom and a playroom for Micha, complete with new clothes and toys so she won't be without."
Himchan mindlessly nodded, too consumed with his own thoughts. "Okay."
"This is for the best." Micha's grandmother declared while giving him a harsh look.
He his lips and swallowed. "I agree." he said.
His agreement, seemed to please her and she softened her look. There was something else he still needed from her though. The one question that haunted him this whole time. "Do you... Did she... tell you... why she didn't tell me?"
The lady shrugged. "Isn't that obvious? It's the same reason we're here. You're not fit to be a parent."
His exact thought and fear. As he felt his shoulders droop, he also felt his heart ache. Even though he didn't like the answer, he knew it was true. All the times he snapped and yelled at Micha. The horrible things he had said to her. Not recognizing her outbursts as her way of trying to deal with her mom's death.
"This really is for the best." he grimly thought.
"The time dear." the man piped in.
"Right." she replied while nodding. "We have some more affairs to take care of and a plane to catch in a few of hours." Then she gestured towards the little girl. "Come Micha."
Micha hesitated while glancing between Himchan and her grandmother. Then she slowly got off the couch and walked over to them while carrying her stuff animal.
"Leave the toy." her grandfather instructed. "You don't need to bring that with you."
Instantly Himchan could see the fear in her eyes as her grip on the toy tightened. "She needs it." he hurriedly said, coming to her aid. "It helps her with the stress. She's not coping well over... everything... and it's the only thing that's helped."
The grandmother scrunched up her face but conceded. "Very well." Then she glanced down at Micha. "If you lose it during the trip, I don't want to hear any crying about it."
The little girl nodded her head and then looked at Himchan. "I promise I won't lose it."
He forced a smile on his face just for her. "I know you won't." He knelt down and moved a loose strand of hair from her face. "You're going to have your own bedroom soon. And a playroom too. An entire room for nothing but toys. Doesn't that sound fun?"
"Yeah." she agreed but with less enthusiasm.
His smile faltered as he pressed his lips together and swallowed. But he quickly smiled again to encourage her. "It's okay. We'll see each other again." He reached over and rubbed the stuff animal's head. "You still have to tell me what name you decided on."
This finally brought a smile to her face. "Okay."
Nodding, he stood up. Then he watched as the lady took Micha's hand and the man opened the front door. The three of them walked out with Micha stealing one last look behind her.
"Bye Micha." he said and waved at her.
"Bye Himchan." she replied before they were around the corner and out of sight.

Closing the door, he felt that same numb feeling wash over him. He turned and leaned against the door, surveying his reclaimed apartment. For some reason, it didn't look the same.
With heavy steps, he went over and sat on the couch. His foot hit something and he looked down at the floor. Peeking out from under the couch was a toy they had missed. He reached down and picked it up. He examined it in his hands for a moment before carefully placing it on the coffee table.
Then he looked around the living room, still searching for something familiar. The only thing he could think about though was that it was quiet. Too quiet. No sound effects while she played. No cartoons on the television. No screaming about cinnamon oatmeal. Just quiet.
He rubbed his hands on his pants and swallowed thickly. But then he placed his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands.
"." he cursed out loud and breaking the silence, knowing nobody was around to hear him.