It was like being enfolded into his mother’s warm embrace and being promised complete protection from any kind of harm. That was what it felt like, standing in front of Mama’s life tree. He’d been away from her for only a few shorts days, but upon being returned, it felt more like years. Decades, even.

“Happy to be back?” Xiumin asked from near Luhan’s elbow.

“Xiumin,” Luhan breathed out, turning to look at him. “I am very happy to be back.” Happy to feel Mama thrumming under his skin, soothing over him with silent power, causing the tiny hairs on his arms and legs to vibrate. Happy to simply feel her.

It was only now he was realizing how terribly being parted from her had been. It had been agony, upon reflection. Agony to live even a second without feeling her in his heart, through only the faint vibrations of the ground and sky.

He had never, not for a second, ever considered blaming Kai for what had happened. If anything, Kai had been the innocent party and Luhan had almost gotten them both killed. Kai had saved him, even if he’d torn Luhan away from Mama and away from her guiding hand.

Only the knowledge that he had friends who would do their best to help him had comforted him and given him hope during the worst moments. But it was possible some part of him had never really believed he’d see home again. Mama was … indescribably powerful, but not even she was in full control of everything.

Sehun took a deliberate step forward jarring Luhan from his thoughts, gushing, “It’s so big!” He looked young, innocent and full of amazement. Luhan had to remind himself this was Sehun’s first time seeing Mama’s life tree. It was probably his first time really connecting with her, too.

It made Luhan wonder if Kai felt a connection to Mama. He’d certainly been around the life tree enough as of late. Of course it seemed unlikely that he’d feel Mama in the same way that Luhan did. It seemed as if no one felt Mama the way Luhan did.

Kai.

The first time Luhan had dreamed of Kai he’d woken flushed, sweaty and sticky. Filled with sudden humiliation over the kind of reaction a dream could evoke from his body, he’d tried to put Kai from his mind completely. Dreaming about a lover he’d have in the future wasn’t something he planned to share with anyone, ever. But the dreams hadn’t stopped. They’d gotten more intense, instead, and years before he’d met Kai, he’d learned the most intimate things about him.

Dreaming about Sehun had been different. He’d woken from those dreams comforted by a phantom friendship, excited to share experiences with Sehun that they hadn’t actually had yet. Luhan had had his suspicions very recently that Mama had forged that kind of relationship between them for the very moment when it was necessary for Sehun to find him amidst the teleportation accident. Things worked out oddly when Mama was involved.

But it was a hard sell sometimes, even Luhan to had to admit, to believe that Mama was orchestrating certain events. She was there, surrounding them at all times, and it was an undisputable fact, but few thought she was something sentient. Still, there was simply no other explanation that Luhan could come up with for the things he’d seen through his visions and dreams over the years.

Why would he dream about the very people who’d end up saving him and loving him and making all the difference in the world, if not due to meticulous planning? He never dreamed about unimportant people. He never had visions about events in the future that weren’t crucial in some way.

“The life tree is big,” Luhan agreed, crossing to stand near Sehun. The taller boy’s head was tipped completely back and his mouth was open in awe. “When you look up like that, it kind of makes you feel small, right? But in a good way.”

Sehun nodded. “Luhan. You didn’t tell me I’d feel this way seeing the life tree. Standing in front of it.”

Luhan questioned, “Can you feel her now?”

“Huh?” Sehun clarified, “No. I mean, well, I just feel like I’m part of something important for the first time in my life. I have one of Mama’s gifts. She must have given it to me for some reason. She must have seen something special in me.”

Luhan let his arm link through Sehun’s. “You are very special, Sehun. Mama’s gifts are rare. You should be comforted by the idea that she doesn’t just give them to anyone.”

“Well,” Chanyeol said, moving to Luhan’s other side. “I absolutely can feel Mama, and I don’t mean in that metaphoric way that Sehun does. I think my body is vibrating--my bones. This is crazy.”

A smile stretched out across Luhan’s face. “I told you, Chanyeol. Just wait until you actually touch the life tree.”

Sehun’s eyebrows shot up. “We can touch it?”

“Luhan.”

Luhan turned, trying not to mirror the frown on Xiumin’s face automatically. His friend had been full of smiles and laughter when they’d been younger. The change to a more mature, stoic Xiumin had been slow going, but Luhan hated it most days. He wanted to run through the halls of the palace with Xiumin just once more, and go swimming in the nearby lake with him and just be free.

“Xiumin,” Luhan echoed back. “Let me have a moment with Mama’s life tree. Tao’s already gone ahead to the palace. He’ll tell Kris before he does anything else, and Kris will come directly here, probably with half the palace guard to drag me back. I just want a couple of minutes here.”

Xiumin pursed his lips. “The color is coming back to your face, but you still don’t look good. I think we should come back later, and you should go to the palace right away to see a doctor. Lay’s probably sleeping and he can see you in the morning, but it would make me feel better if I knew you were okay.”

Slowly Luhan stretched his arms up, his fingers reaching towards the brilliant night sky. “I feel great, Xiumin. I promise you. I can feel Mama again like I’m supposed to.”

He could feel the vibrations in him like Chanyeol claimed, but it was even stronger when he breathed in deeply and simply felt her presence around him. He was feeling more solid than ever, and not incapable of standing firm on his feet without any help from Xiumin. Sometimes it felt like Luhan needed Mama’s spirit surrounding him more than he needed the oxygen he breathed in. This was one of them.

“I still think we should go back now.”

Luhan knew Xiumin meant well, but Luhan didn’t think he could afford to be parted from Mama’s life tree at the moment. Not even for the short distance to the palace. Over the past few months, but especially recently, Mama had been attempting to tell him something important. She was sentient, of that Luhan had no doubt, but she couldn’t speak to him. She couldn’t use words. She could only send him images and impressions and feelings. And everything she’d been trying to get across to him was bad.

It was worse than bad. It was the kind of stuff made of nightmares, and it was the content of the visions, not the visions themselves, that often left Luhan incapacitated. Mama was in trouble. She was scared and there was something just out of sight that was the kind of threat unlike anything they’d ever seen. He had to figure out what it was, and quickly.

Xiumin remarked, “I could just drag you back to the palace without your consent.”

Luhan tried to force a smile at his friend’s empty threat, but he was stuck now thinking about the darkness in Mama’s visions. And it was darkness. That was the best Luhan could come up with. It was a shadowy force of something evil creeping up on Mama, and she was split, trying to fight it off, and also protect her children from each other.

The war between M and K had clearly left Mama vulnerable.

“Xiumin. Please.”

Luhan turned back to Sehun, telling him encouraging, “Of course you can touch Mama’s life tree. You have more a right than most people who come to see her. Sometimes I come out here and take my shoes off and just lay down next to her roots. My visions are stronger when I’m in contact with her.”

He needed more visions. That was for sure. They were draining and dangerous, and he knew both Kai and Kris protested them fiercely, but if he could unravel the mystery of what was speeding towards them shrouded in darkness and evil, then Luhan thought they had a real shot at fighting it off. The visions, no matter their toll on him, were worth it. Mama had clearly been trying to reach him when he’d been so far away in K. Maybe she’d send him a vision if he touched her life tree just now.

Chanyeol reminded, “You said you have fits when you have those visions. Seizures sometimes. I can feel Mama right now. I don’t want any visions, Luhan. Am I going to run the risk of that if I touch her roots?”

That was an interesting idea and Luhan answered honestly, “I’m not sure. I only know one other person who’s had visions from Mama before, but they didn’t receive them after touching her life tree. If you can feel her strongly right now, you might want to avoid touching the roots. I don’t think we’d have visions in the same way, but Mama has been trying to communicate with you through your dreams. Best to be safe and not risk it.”

Sehun bent forward to pull at the laces on his shoes. He declared, “I don’t feel anything, remember? I’m going to touch the life tree. I might not get the chance again.”

“Go on,” Luhan laughed, giving him a playful push.

“Come with me.” Sehun reached back for him, lacing his fingers through Luhan’s. “I want you with me, Luhan.”

Luhan squeezed Sehun’s fingers back and tried not to think about the feelings that Sehun seemed to be developing for him. They were written all over the young man’s face. It was a harmless crush, he told himself. The last twinge of boyhood.

“Luhan! Luhan!”

Luhan let his hand drop from Sehun’s and he spun, recognizing Kai’s voice immediately.

“Kai?” Were his eyes deceiving him? He didn’t think so, but it was also a little unbelievable to think that Kai was here in M. However a moment later Luhan spotted him. Kai was a short distance away, appearing out of nowhere to dash forward in a blur. The teleporter was shouting his name almost frantically, waving his arms.

“Stop, Luhan!” Kai shouted again, vanishing from sight only to take Luhan shortly off balance by appearing in front of him. He crushed Luhan into his embrace, spinning him off his feet and away from the life tree.

“Kai!” Luhan threw his arms around Kai’s neck and squeezed hard, ignoring the people watching and the spectacle they were probably making of themselves.

He loved Kai very much. It was a love so intense and passionate that he’d needed ages to come to grips with, but he couldn’t imagine his life without it now. Kai was the kind of companion he’d always dreamed of having, caring and considerate, but with more than enough combative opinions to keep Luhan engrossed in him. Sometimes they worked perfectly together, and sometimes they clashed horribly, but they always gravitated back together.

It made Luhan agreeing to marry his cousin all the more difficult. Kai was the man Luhan wanted to marry. Kai was the person that Luhan wanted to spend all his days with, and have a family with, and grow old with. In that respect, despite how much Luhan loved his cousin, Kris was a poor substitute.

“You can’t,” Kai breathed out, setting Luhan down on his feet, “touch that stupid tree.”

“Are you sick?” Luhan asked right away, bring his hand up to push at Kai’s bangs. “You look ill.”

Kai’s muscles seemed to lock up for a second, and then he was pulling Luhan into an even tighter hug, breathing out some kind of relief, saying, “I’m so sorry for what happened. I had the lock in my mind. It was safe to teleport. But then I lost it. I let myself get distracted and I lost you. I could have lost you forever.”

“I startled you,” Luhan argued back. “I made you break your concentration. You know it isn’t your fault. I would never blame you. I love you.”

It didn’t matter that they’d prepared to part with each other for good the last time they’d been together. It didn’t matter that Luhan was supposed to marry someone else and Kai shouldn’t have been there in the heart of M with a million people poised to try for the bounty currently on Kai’s head. All that mattered was that they were together again, and Luhan felt complete. With Mama and Kai, he felt whole.

“Xiumin,” Luhan called over his shoulder, catching the gaze of his wide eyed friend on the brink of attacking. “This is Kai. I know you’re confused, but please don’t attack him again. I don’t want to end up in K after just getting back here. Also, I love him very much.”

Then, ignoring Xiumin completely, and the look of disbelief on his face, Luhan captured Kai’s face in his hands and leaned in to kiss him deeply.

Nearby, Chanyeol said, “Is it always like this in M? If it’s this exciting on a daily basis I might consider relocating.”

Kai kissed him back fiercely, wrapping strong hands around Luhan’s waist.

“What are you doing here?” Luhan asked confused when he’d kissed Kai enough to make his lips ache. “It’s too dangerous.”

Xiumin came up darkly to crowd into their personal space. “Luhan,” he said slowly and darkly, “You need to explain to me right now why you’re kissing the person who kidnapped you. He’s a known soldier in K’s army and he is the enemy. You don’t want me to attack him again, but I’m finding that a difficult request to respect.”

“Never mind that,” Kai said, and Luhan sent a pleading look to Xiumin. “You have to stay away from that tree. Your prince said it’s dangerous. He sent me to stop you.”

Xiumin rolled is eyes and said in disbelief, “You and his highness were just having a friendly talk then? I highly doubt the prince would send you to do anything. He doesn’t associate with the likes of you.”

Kai asked Luhan, “This is your best friend? Really? Not as charming as you said he was.”

Kai and Xiumin would get along well in due time. Of that Luhan was certain. They had complimenting personality types when they weren’t busy growling at each other and cutting sarcastic comments. They would come to an eventual understanding that would lead to a friendship. Luhan has seen it. He knew it.

“Xiumin,” Luhan said, “I’m begging you to just hold on for a second. Kai is … very important to me. I love him.” He dropped his voice low. He was speaking treason now, or something at the very least that would destroy the love the people had for him. But he was so tired of hiding who he was and who he loved. He was tried of hiding Kai. “I love him very much. I’m in love with him, boazi.”

“In love with him,” Xiumin echoed back. There was serious look etched into his face. “Are you … being completely truthful to me?”

Luhan gave him a firm nod, then asked Kai, “Why would Kris send you to keep me away from Mama’s life tree? Kris knows better than anyone that I spend a great deal of time here, and I’m always touching her life tree.”

“No.” Kai shook his head fiercely. “You can’t touch the tree. Something is wrong with it. Someone else touched it and it almost killed them.”

“Killed?” Luhan repeated, unable to believe it. “Mama’s life tree is life, Kai. Not death.”

Chanyeol said, “I’m even more on board with the idea of not touching it now.”

“Who was hurt?” Xiumin cut in. “And I agree with you, Luhan. It’s ludicrous that the life tree would hurt someone.”

A little helplessly, Kai said, “Someone named Lay. That’s all I know.”

“Lay?” Luhan demanded, panicked. “Mama hurt Lay? How? Why?”

“I don’t know.” Kai put his hands forcefully on Luhan’s shoulders. “All I know is that he’s hurt, really bad, and it’s because he touched Mama’s life tree. The prince let me come here to try and get to you before you touched it. You can’t. The life tree could hurt you too. I am not going to let that happen.”

That just didn’t make any sense. Mama’s life tree was proof of her presence and of her love for them. It was a tree that brought them together, gave them a sense of purpose, and offered up a miracle or two from time to time. When Luhan touched the life tree’s massive roots he was always overcome with both a sense of power and that of reverence. Mama channeled herself through the tree in many ways, and Mama loved them all dearly. She wouldn’t hurt them. Even when they hurt each other, she still wouldn’t hurt them.

“Mama wouldn’t,” Luhan denied. Then dread filled him and he turned sharply, shouting, “Sehun!”

A little distance away Sehun was up near one of the life tree’s roots, a hand outstretched to touch.

Sehun had been so impressed by the life tree. He’d been awed and practically swooning. And all Luhan could think was that he’d told Sehun that it was safe to touch the life tree. He’d pushed Sehun towards the action.

If there was even a chance that Mama’s life tree had hurt Lay, and that she could hurt Sehun because of Luhan’s encouragement, Luhan was certain his heart would break. Because it would be his fault.

How could he live with himself if he let Sehun, who was so precious to him now, get hurt?

“Don’t!”

Luhan lunged forward, already devastated.

“What?” Sehun asked, confounded.

“Wait.” Luhan breathed out, at his side a second later, unsure what to think of the situation. He looked back to Kai who was next to him suddenly. “Kai. I thought you said it was dangerous.”

“What’s going on?” Chanyeol asked, pushing his glasses up on his nose. The disguise he wore was convincing, but he clearly lacked the confidence to pull it off completely. “I thought you said it was dangerous.”

“What’s dangerous?” Sehun inquired.

Luhan looked back to where Sehun was touching the life tree’s root. “That’s what Kai just said.”

Kai held up his hands defensively. “That’s what I was told, okay? I really don’t think your prince would let me come out here without more than a full unit of soldiers to pass along that kind of message if it wasn’t true. Someone was hurt by touching the life tree. Someone named Lay.”

Sehun patted the big, exposed root. “I’m not hurt right now.”

“Do you feel anything?” Luhan asked.

“Just hungry,” Sehun laughed out.

A little out of breath from the dash to Sehun’s side, Xiumin offered, “Maybe there was already something wrong with Lay. He spends all his time healing others, and taking care of them. He could have caught a cold and left it untreated. Maybe he was just in the wrong palace at the wrong time.”

Luhan felt a twinge of regret and guilt. Lay was seemingly always on call with him. He’d taken to sleeping in Luhan’s room once or twice a week and it shouldn’t have had to be that way.

Xiumin reached out tentatively, putting his own hand down on the root. “I feel fine, too.”

With a firm tone, Chanyeol declared, “I’m still not touching it.”

Kai’s head cocked and for the first time he took a real look at Chanyeol. He blinked a few times, then asked, “Chanyeol? Is that you? What the hell are you doing here?”

“Long story,” Chanyeol said simply. “I’ll tell you later. Does Commander Suho know you’re sleeping with the enemy?”

Xiumin groaned and Kai had the decency to duck his head before admitting, “He knows now.”

“This,” Sehun said, looking from face to face, “is about to get very interesting, I think.” He raised a finger and pointed, alerting them all that the prince had arrived with a full squad of soldiers and was jogging the distance over to him with Tao hot on his heels.

“Luhan!” Kris called out to him.

Sehun had said interesting, but Luhan rather thought he meant complicated. It would probably take hours just to get everything straightened out. And there was still Chanyeol and Sehun’s safety to think about. Luhan had thought he’d have enough time to present Chanyeol to Mama and receive some kind of answer in relation to him, then smuggle him out to K long before his cousin arrived.

Mama, he thought silently, reaching out to put his hand next to where Sehun’s had been, was a little patience from everyone too much to ask for in the coming minutes?

The second that his hand made contact with the bark of the tree trunk the was assaulted with the most violent, rough and devastating vision he’d ever had in his life. It knocked him clear off his feet and he lost his senses immediately. His world went black, his body became weightless and there was a loud rush of sound in his ears before everything muted completely.

He looked desperately around him, but everything was hazy. He couldn’t see, he couldn’t hear, and the second he made to move forward, his body was immediately battered. He felt himself thrown roughly from side to side, pain ripping through him, making him cry out. He’d never felt anything like this from one of Mama’s visions before. It had never been like this before … like hell.

Then he could see. He could see everything.

Mama wasn’t dying. She wasn’t crumbling away piece by piece, day by day. No. she was already dead. She was a hollowed out, remnant of the past, and as time flew past Luhan, everything distorting in a static way, he saw the oceans boil over. The sun blotted out, the earth cracked, then crumbled, and finally turned to ash.

Everyone was dying. They were screaming and burning and no one was safe.

And the darkness, the thing that had been lurking just out of sight, was suddenly all too clear to Luhan.

Vile and twisted, the darkness struck out indiscriminately, killing everything in sight, wiping out life and hope, and leaving nothing behind. It was a monster, an ancient relic of something so long past it had been forgotten. And Luhan watched it kill everyone.

Kris was dead. Xiumin was dead. Kai was dead.

Luhan himself was dead.

Everyone was gone and Exo was a dead rock in space before the shadow moved on.

In the aftermath of the vision, as it began to wind down and Luhan felt his body ache with coherent thought, light started to come back.

Something hot blew into Luhan’s chest.

Pressure pushed on it, more hot air followed, and then Luhan was choking.

He could hear, “Please, Luhan. Please don’t do this. Please. I’m begging you.”

Everything hurt. And it hurt more than on just a physical level. To Luhan, as his senses rebounded, his heart felt heavy. It felt broken, even.

“Luhan.” The voice begging turned to sobs. “I can’t keep this up forever. I can’t … you have to … please. Just fight for me.”

He’d seen years into the future before, to times that made no sense without context, but always came to fruition. He’d seen minutes ahead as well, surprised at the shortness of time. But the vision he’d jut had felt like neither. It was neither far into the future, nor moments away. It had, however, felt absolute.

Mama would die. She would die and so would everyone else. Their future was set.

Luhan felt the rush of air again.

And then, more unexpected than the first vision, a second came to him.

This one wasn’t violent. It wasn’t painful like the first, either. It was short, gentle, and filled simply with the feeling of hope. It was a last push from Mama, a last ditch effort to tell him how to prevent what he’d seen. To give them a fighting chance.

He knew what he had to do. He knew who he had to talk to. It was time to start uncovering the secrets that he and another had buried so well years ago.

Mama was telling him to do it.

“Do something!” another voice shouted.

Then, “Get out of the way!” followed, and Luhan arched up.

“Luhan?” Lay’s face looked down at him. He was pale, breathing heavily and obviously in no state to be putting his hands on Luhan in an obvious move to heal him. “Can you hear me?”

He wanted to tell Lay not to. Wasn’t Lay supposed to be hurt? How was he there, then? How was he leaning over Luhan, trying to help him?”

“I’m here,” Lay managed, bowing over to press their foreheads. “Mama said.”

She’d said what? What was Lay talking about?

Luhan was so tired.

“I’m going to help you,” Lay said, and Luhan could feel Lay’s ability work through him, already making a difference. “Mama said to come. She said you needed me.”

Mama. Luhan mulled her over in his mind. She was alive now. Even as he clung to consciousness, he could feel her all around him. She wasn’t dead yet. She was still there.

Kai’s face slid into view next to Lay’s. “Luhan? Don’t fight him. Let him help you.”

He wanted to tell them all that he’d be okay. He’d felt bad before after visions, and though this was considerably worse, but he had faith he’d recover. He had to. Mama had shown him those things for a reason. He was strong enough to hold on until he could tell the others.

“Sleep,” Kris urged, pushing fingers through his hair. “Sleep and rest.”

He could hardly believe the faces above him, Lay and Kai and Kris, all hovering there, not hurting each other, not attacking each other, calm and supportive.

It was the easiest request he’d ever followed.

He woke up in his bedroom. He knew it was his bedroom by the mosaic of red and yellow tiles rippling across his ceiling. He’d spent ages just staring up at it in the past, memorizing ever pattern, every detail, and finding comfort in the color scheme. As far as he knew his ceiling was unique to his room.

Disoriented, he turned to the side, feeling a heavy weight across his hand. Lay was on the bed next to him, curled onto his side facing Luhan, their fingers threaded. That was normal. And even more normal was Xiuimin’s form curled up on the chair next to the bed. Everything seemed like it was exactly where it was supposed to be.

At least until he inched is head the other direction, and saw for the first time Sehun snoring in his bed, Kris across the room sleeping on the settee by the window, and Chanyeol just visible from where he was sitting cross-legged on the floor, engrossed in one of Luhan’s many books. He didn’t seem to be aware that he wasn’t the only one awake.

Then the door to his bedroom cracked open and Chen slipped through silently, followed by Tao.

It was easy to close his eyes and pretend to be asleep once more. It didn’t dull the pain in his body any, but it bought him a little extra time to hide from the reality of what he’d experienced.

“Your highness?” Luhan could hear Tao whisper, probably shaking Kris’ shoulder. “You asked me to wake you when it’s time to get ready for your speech. “You’ve got about an hour before you’re expected.”

The rustling of clothing reached Luhan’s ears as Kris asked, “Is Luhan still out?”

Luhan held perfectly still, controlling his breathing.

“Looks like it. And he’ll probably be asleep for a while longer. Come on. I’ll help you dress. Do you know what you’re going to do yet?”

After that Tao and Kris were talking too quietly to be heard, and Luhan thought it probably had something to do with Chanyeol being awake and alert in the room.

“Should I stay here?” Luhan heard Chanyeol asked. “With Sehun?” It was probably a miracle that they were alright and no one was fighting. There was no way their cover had held until this long.

With a weary sigh, Kris said, “Luhan’s gone ahead and granted you diplomatic immunity. I’m going to honor that, no matter how much I don’t want to. But I expect you to keep out of sight. Who knows how people will react to knowing I have you here, in this very palace.”

Kris was too tired to fight. Luhan could tell from the way he spoke, and how slowly he was moving. On a better day he might have been more combative, or at the least had an issue with keeping Chanyeol in the same room as Lay or himself. But after all that had happened, there didn’t seem to be much fight left in Kris.

“I don’t think you have to worry about me setting the place on fire,” Chanyeol remarked. “I’m wearing one of your fancy bracelets. And I wouldn’t risk hurting Luhan or Sehun.”

“Luhan,” Kris eased out, and then Luhan could feel dry lips pressing against his forehead. “Forgive me.”

“What’s going on?” Xiumin asked, which meant he was awake and Luhan’s time to hide was dwindling by the second. Xiumin could always spot when he was faking it.

“I’m taking his highness to prepare for his speech,” Tao said. “I want you to bring Chanyeol to our guest suite and keep him hidden there. We don’t want it getting out here’s here. People won’t understand the reason behind it. The kid can stay. He’s less of a threat than the rest of them, not to mention he isn’t military. And he’s about as stubborn about Luhan as Xiumin is.”

“The suite with the other two from K?”

Luhan’s heart picked up. Kai. He had to be talking about Kai. And a suite was a far cry from the holding cell Luhan had feared Kris had put Kai into. But who was the second person if Kai was the first?

Tao made a sound of agreement. “Chen will stay here, to look over Luhan, and you’ll be responsible for the others.”

“I’d rather stay here,” Xiumin responded immediately.

“I would too, actually,” Chanyeol added.

“Enough,” Kris said, voice authoritative in the room. “This isn’t the time to squabble or fight over who goes where. Xiumin, just do as you’re told. I don’t have time for this.”

A few second more and the room was quiet again, with only the sounds of breathing and feet pacing the floor to occupy Luhan’s ears.

He had to get up. That’s what he told himself, but even opening his eyes seemed a chore now. His body ached, his head was pounding, and he felt beyond lethargic, but he had to act on what Mama had shown him. He had to tell the other and he had to be quick about it.

“Chen.” Luhan opened his eyes, shook Lay’s hand free, and sat up.

Chen was pale with relief. “Are you okay?”

With a gasp next to him Lay shot up in bed, fumbling for Luhan’s hand almost instinctively.

“It’s okay,” Luhan breathed out to him, enfolding him in a hug. “Lay. It’s okay.”

Lay took in deep breaths, eyes a little wild. “Sorry.”

“Are you feeling okay?” Luhan asked, looking him over. “I was scared when Kai said you’d been hurt. By Mama’s life tree? Badly? Tell me everything.”

Chen inched forward as Lay said, “I went to Mama’s life tree to pray. I wanted to pray for your safe return. And when I touched the roots I felt something … horrible, I guess. Mama felt like she was in pain, and I reacted. I tried to heal her instinctively. That’s all I remember. That and the pain. Then I woke up here, in the palace, because I knew you needed me.”

“How?”

“Mama,” Lay offered with a shrug. “I felt better, too. Sort of like I’d been healed. And all I knew was that Mama had woken me, and she was pushing me towards her life tree because you needed me. I knew to come, without knowing how I knew. Does that make sense?”

Luhan mustered up a smile. “Oddly enough, yes. I know things all the time from Mama, and I can’t explain how I know them.”

Sehun shifted on the bed, still sleeping heavily.

“Luhan,” Lay asked gently. “What did you see in your vision?”

There was something weird about the way Lay was looking at him. And both he and Chen were being far more careful with their actions and words than they usually were. It made him ask bluntly, “What’s wrong?”

Chen grimaced. “Your visions usually send you into some weird catatonic state that mostly just freaks us all out, I mean, after you’re done seizing. But this time …”

Lay cut in smoothly, “You were screaming. A lot. This was different.”

“You stopped breathing,” Chen said. “That guy, Kai, he was breathing for you until Lay got there to jumpstart you. You can’t sit there and tell either one of us that this vision wasn’t different. Your screams … I’ve never heard anything like it before. You were screaming like you were dying. Maybe you were.”

Lay smoothed a hand over Luhan’s bangs affectionately. “That man, Kai, he knew basic first aid and he performed it without heasitation. Chen wasn’t lying when he said that Kai kept you alive for several minutes. He kept you breathing.”

“Kai,” Luhan mumbled. “Where’s Kai?”

Dismissively, Chen said, “He’s technically our prisoner, but not even his highness can discredit the fact that he saved your life with his quick actions. And he could have taken off with you again if he wanted to. He stayed, and he didn’t fight. So I repeat, technically he’s a prisoner of war, and unofficially he’s hanging out with his friend, in one of our suites until his highness makes his speech and decides what to do with him.”

Luhan pushed at Lay, demanding, “Let me up. I need to go see him.”

“I hardly think you’re in any condition--”

“Let me up,” Luhan thundered, not caring at all if he woke Sehun. “I need to see him. I need to …”

Slowly, Chen said, “You need to stay away from him. Ah, Luhan, don’t give me that look, please. I know the two of you are having this big love affair, but you need to think about your cousin. That speech he’s about to make? None of us know for sure, but he might call for the withdrawal of troops in K. He might propose the end of the push for unification. He’s got you back now, and he never wanted to go to war in the first place. You have to put on a convincing show to support him, and win the people over to his thinking if that’s what he goes for. You can’t be seen with anyone else. You need to protect his highness right now. Not hurt him.”

Luhan thought those words over. Kris was considering ending the war? Luhan had always known how little Kris favored the war, but ending it? It was almost too good to believe.

“What about his father?” Luhan asked. “What about the king?”

Lay shook his head. “He’s a day away from death. Maybe less. There might be just enough time for his highness to propose ending the war, marry you, and secure his power. That’s if you support him and do what he’s hoping you will. It’s what he’s trusting you’ll do.”

Luhan was at peace with the idea of marrying Kris. He didn’t want to, and Kai held his heart without question, but he’d always known his place. In fact, he’d known for quite some time that his parents, and Kris’ parents, had deliberately planned their births with the hopes that a match could be made. He was going to marry Kris. Of that Luhan was sure.

Luhan repeated one more time, “Let me up,” and then surged to his feet as Chen pulled him up strongly.

“What’re you doing?” Lay asked.

It was hard to get his balance, and he swayed more than a couple of times, but Lay had apparently worked wonders with his gift. Luhan thought at least he could manage the walk to the guest suites.

“I’m going to see Kai firstly, and neither of you are going to stop me.” He had to explain things. He had to … apologize.

“Then?” Chen asked.

Luhan readied himself. “I’m going to come back here, and you two are going to help me look … better than how I look now. I’ll get dressed, I’ll calm myself down, and then I’ll go and I’ll stand by my cousin’s side as he makes his speech. We’ll tell the people that in light of the war, and the risk it poses, we were married in secret. We’ll give them the wedding they want afterwards.”

Sehun grunted suddenly, sitting up with glazed over sleep eyes.

“But you’re not married,” Lay pointed out.

“We will be,” Luhan countered. “Right after, just before the king dies.”

“You think his highness is going to go for that?” Chen wondered.

Luhan was sure of it. “It’s what he’s wanted. And it doesn’t matter if he’s announcing the end to the war, or his full support of it. He needs me there. He needs our marriage. And I’ve always understood what my duties are. Don’t misunderstand, Lay.”

“What’s going on?” Sehun demanded, fear cracking his voice.

“Stay here, okay?” Luhan said, feeling a surge of protectiveness. “I have to go talk to Kai, but then I’ll come right back to you. You’ll be fine until then. I promise.”

Disgruntled, Sehun said, “I’m not a kid. You don’t have to talk to me like I’m one.”

Almost playfully, Chen offered, “Don’t take it personal. Luhan’s older than all of us, except for Xiumin, and even that doesn’t matter when it comes to him babying us.”

“Let’s go,” Lay said, looping an arm around Luhan. He could feel Lay’s power bleeding into him once more, making him stronger and keeping his legs steady.

It was a short distance from Luhan’s personal rooms to the guest suite Kai was currently confined to, but by the time he and Lay reached their destination Luhan was breathing hard.

“Will you tell us all about your vision after this?” Lay asked as they paused outside the door. “Luhan, I’m very serious when I say that you scared us all to death. Your screams … they were terrifying.”

“I will,” Luhan said, reaching for the door. “I promise, Lay. When everyone is together, and I only have to say it once, I’ll tell you all everything.” And then maybe, if they were very lucky, they’d be able to come up with some sort of plan.

“Luhan!”

Once more, as if Kai secretly knew how much he loved it, the second he was in sight Kai was pulling him off his feet, holding them tight and turning them in a circle without a care in the world.

“Calm down,” Luhan laughed out, letting himself get lost in the moment. “You’re making me dizzy.”

“No way,” Kai argued, laughing himself. “I’ve spun you way more than this before.”

Settling down, Luhan hugged him tightly, mumbling into his ear, “I’m so glad you’re okay. I wasn’t sure that Kris would … respect my wishes in that department.”

“I don’t like the guy,” Kai said bluntly, pepping a small kiss down onto the corner of Luhan’s mouth. “And I know he doesn’t like me. But I think we’re sort of starting to understand each other.”

From behind them a voice cleared, and a man said, “You must be Luhan, then. Considering the fact that my best friend is head over heels in love with you, this isn’t exactly the way I wanted to meet you.”

“Best friend?” Luhan questioned, looking around Kai at the shorter boy. “Oh! You must be D.O.. I’ve been dying to meet you. Kai talks a lot about you. I kind of feel like I already know you.”

D.O. looked surprised, and Luhan felt it was such a missed opportunity that they hadn’t been able to properly cultivate a friendship just yet.

Kai said, “Not that I’m not glad to see you, but you were in bad shape the last time we were together. Should you be up?”

Luhan gestured back to Lay who was waiting for him in the doorway. “I happen to have access to someone with a healing gift. Lay got me back on my feet, and that’s all that matters.”

“And your cousin just let you come waltzing down here?” Kai leaned close, his breath warm on Luhan’s ear. “You scared the life out of me. You stopped breathing and I have never felt so much fear and panic in my life.”

Here it was. The moment that Luhan knew had to happen, but dreaded.

Holding back words for a moment, he tilted his head up for a deep, longing kiss. His fingers curling around the material of Kai’s shirt and he closed his eyes, wanting to cherish every second.

“Wow,” Kai breathed out. “What was that for?”

He felt his eyes grow wet, and as Kai’s face turned concerned, Luhan said, “I’m so sorry, Kai. But there’s something I have to do very shortly, and it’s going to hurt the both of us.”

Later on, as Luhan stood in front of Kris, their hands clasped as they recited their marriage vows, all Luhan could think of was the look of devastation on Kai’s face when he told him he still planned to go through with his marriage. And when the ceremony was practically over, and Kris was leaning in for a kiss, Luhan was filled with the knowledge that Kai would never kiss him again, or hold him in his arms, or tell him how much he loved him.

“You’re crying,” Kris said, reaching out to rub away the wetness on Luhan’s cheeks. “What’s wrong?”

“It’s nothing,” Luhan promised, but his heart ached. No matter what happened with Mama, Luhan didn’t think his heart would ever be whole again. It couldn’t be.