V

Sehun woke up and she was the first thing on his mind once again. Sora’s words echoed in his head; not letting him breathe for a second. It had been a while since anyone really considered that there was someone different behind the words he spat out. The last people who did were his friends; and that was at least 6 years ago. 

His hand patted the area around him, searching for his phone. After he grasped it with his hand, he pressed on the home button, checking the time: 6 AM on a Saturday morning. 

He lightly tossed his phone back on his bed and rubbed his eyes. He finally felt better after the incident and didn’t feel like going back to sleep. He had slept a lot anyways. His thoughts wandered to the riverside he used to go to with his mom before he hated her.

And honestly, he didn’t hate her; he was mad at her. 

Yes, it was immature and childish of him to be pulling this kind of tantrum at his age, but he was hurt and he let his feelings take over. Sehun wanted his mom to feel the same pain he felt when she chose work over him and he wouldn’t stop until his anger subsided. 

He lazily stepped out of bed and grabbed a winter coat before stepping out of the apartment and into the elevator, slightly ruffling his bed hair. It wasn’t far to reach the riverside and he soon arrived to find out he wasn’t alone. 

Sora was sitting with her feet in the water, laying flat on the ground with her eyes closed; she had this expression of pure bliss. 

He slightly smiled; he hadn’t seen her in a while since he was gone from school for a week due to his concussion and Sora sort of grew on him. She kept proving him wrong and left a memorable mark on him. It gave him hope that not all women were like his mom.

Sehun could feel a shiver crawl up his skin as he saw what she was wearing. A simple white dress with a gray cardigan. It looked as though she wanted to be alone, but he felt himself being pulled towards her. Closer and closer.

“Aren’t you cold?”

She smiled.

“Yeah.”

Her eyes opened and saw Sehun’s face hovering a few feet above hers. He was standing near her head, but Sora wasn’t surprised; she heard someone walk near her and she could recognize his voice anywhere.

“Why do you look so happy when you’re cold?” His face contorted in confusion. “What if you get sick?”

“I’ll be fine.” Angels don’t get sick. “I like feeling the water flow past my legs.”

“Even though it’s the middle of winter?”

“Even better.”

Sehun was surprised at her response. 

“You’re crazy.”

“Maybe I am.” 

He made his way and sat next to her, his arms resting on his knees. There was an itch in his throat ever since he last saw her.

“…I’m sorry.”

Sora turned her head towards Sehun. Her expression fell.

“You don’t need to be. I’m sure you have your reasons…” If you knew who I really was, you wouldn’t want to apologize. I could be the reason as to why you treated me and every other girl like that.

Sora slightly bit on her lips, feeling sad once more.

“There. You always make that face when you look at me. Why?” It bothered him so much. It looked like she committed some grave sin against him, but it was the other way around. He was the one who bullied her for no reason.

Sora was quiet. Her hands pushed on the ground so that she was sitting upright like Sehun. She swiped the dirt off her hands and ran her fingers through her long hair; a sigh escaping her lips. 

It felt a little early to tell him this, but somehow, she knew it had to be now. 

“Can I tell you a story? A story about a girl who had a broken heart…”

This girl kept confusing him more and more. “You didn’t answ-“

Sora’s hazel eyes gazed into his. “Just listen. Your answer is in my story.”

Sehun slowly nodded. From the look in her eyes, he knew this story was not what it sounded like.

“I knew this girl…and she was born with a dysfunctional heart. Doctors said that she would die before the age of 18 and that she should stay in the hospital, so her life was spent in a mechanical bed in a room that smelled only of sterilized metals and chemicals. Her parents soon abandoned her, but said they would pay for her hospital fees. They were wealthy and the money wasn't an issue...They just didn’t want to take care of their child. Because she was a broken baby…” Sora felt a lump growing in and a surge of emotions rushing through her body. Sehun quietly waited for her to continue; he didn’t know what else to do.

“The girl went through multiple surgeries to help her live to be older, but unless she got a new heart, it wouldn’t save her.” Sora unconsciously touched her chest with her hand. Her scar remained as an angel, but she was glad that it did. It was something that she was proud of now. “She couldn’t attend school because her condition wouldn’t let her. She had too many attacks that it would be too risky… So she didn’t have many friends. There would be a couple of kids in the hospital that she would try to make friends with, but by the time she thought she would was growing closer to them, they became healthy and left the hospital. There was only one boy her age that stayed in the hospital…her only friend. But he died from a sudden heart attack. The girl cried so much after that and hated God for doing this to her. No family, no friends, nothing.”

Sehun’s ears perked. His mom said something similar about the girl she took care of.

“That’s when she met her new nurse. To the little girl, she was a gift from God, an apology from him. The nurse would play with her and spend time after work hours to talk with her. They played so many games together and the nurse would fall for the little girl’s pranks all the time.” 

Sehun could see the warmth in Sora’s expression. The warmth and the sadness. He found himself respecting his mom’s profession a little more. Maybe she wasn’t as bad as he thought.

“The nurse was everything to this little girl. She became the mom she never had. The girl felt wanted for once…like she meant something to the world. Her life wasn’t a waste or a burden on everyone else.” 

Sora didn’t notice that she was crying right now. Her tears were streaming down her face and Sehun lightly wiped them away with his sleeve.

“The thing is, the girl was too young to understand that the woman had her own family as well and that she had a son back at home waiting for her…She always complained and threw tantrums in hopes that the nurse would stay with her and the nurse did. She spent nights there with the girl and calmly sang her to sleep. She even made the nurse come on Christmas once.”

Sehun’s heart hurt. It was like she was talking about his mom. Could it be? But the woman she was talking about seemed loving and selfless. That’s not who his mom was in his mind.

“When the girl became a little older, she stopped forcing the nurse to come every day, but she still came often. The girl felt so bad. She felt as though she was robbing the nurse’s son of his mom. No…she knew that was what she was doing. And she stressed herself out about it. She always wanted to apologize to him and to her nurse for pretty much ruining her family because the girl didn’t have one herself. She remembered nights when the nurse would come in and cry since her son would stop talking to her. It really broke the girl’s heart…Well, broke it even more.”

Sora paused, before she spoke again. “The nurse’s name was Yoojin.”

Sehun’s expression became stiff and his whole body became frigid. 

“Your mom was her nurse Sehun…”

He felt a mix of emotions. Anger, since he saw Sora as the girl who took his mom from him. Guilt, since he never asked his mom about the girl or her side of the story. He just built up a hate and never bothered to hear his mom out. Sadness, since his mom was actually such a good mom to her. But he was still bitter because there were so many other options. Why didn’t his mom just take him with her? Sehun understood the anguish in her eyes when she looked at her before, it made sense. And now, he was curious. Hopeful.

“So what happened to the girl?” He expected her to say that she miraculously survived or that they found a heart for her since Sehun assumed this was Sora’s story. She was sitting in front of her so that would be the only explanation.

“She died. Just a little over a year ago, she suffered another heart attack, but they couldn’t save her in time.”

Sora couldn’t stop her tears and her head began to pound. She wasn't making a tantrum or wailing her heart out, but streams ran down her face; her teeth biting into her lower lip to stop the quivering.

“Wait what? Wasn’t this story about you?” Sehun was once again overcome with guilt. He knew his mom really cherished the girl, she chose her over him so many times. But it explained why his mom stopped going to the hospital as much a year ago and she would cry for days. She wasn’t ever the same since.

Sora remained silent. Sehun understood.

“Thanks for telling me this story…It must have been hard for you.”

He was still confused about how she knew this girl, but he didn’t think it’d be appropriate to pester her for an answer. 

Sehun had another problem on his mind. He didn’t know how to comfort Sora. She was sitting there wiping away her endless tears and he had no idea how to make it stop.

“Sora…stop crying. It’s okay.” His hand reached out to touch hers when he saw the bruises and healing cuts from her hand. 

Guilt… Shame. 

He knew it was when he squeezed her hand. Why didn’t she say anything then? He knew the answer but he still couldn’t understand how someone could be so…beautiful. Not physically, but as a person. His respect and admiration for her kept increasing.

“Oh hey, since you’ve recently moved schools, I bet you don’t know all the hot spots of the area right? I’ll take you.” So stop crying…

Sora had finally stopped crying and looked at him. A smile sprouted on her face and nodded. “So are you saying you’ll be my friend?” Her voice shaky and quiet, but a little teasing.

Sehun smiled as well. “I guess I’ll let you be my friend. So let’s go,” he said as he stood up, reaching out a hand to help her up. She obliged and stood up with him, putting on her shoes after.

He took off his jacket and put it on her. “You should wear that, it’s cold. Let’s stop by my apartment so I can change and grab my wallet. Since I’m taking you out, I want to pay for you.”

Sora became still. She couldn’t meet Yoojin. She would recognize her.

“No, I’ll wait here.”

“What? No, just come with me. You can wait outside if you feel uncomfortable going in.” Was she being shy?

“…Alright.” She won’t see me if I’m outside, right?