-RYEOWOOK-

A week passed and it was torturing Ryeowook without Jongwoon on his side. His days became like the way they used to be. Empty with the feeling of lost and the needs of having Jongwoon welcomed him again. He did regret everything he said to Jongwoon right after he held him on his side. But at the same time, he wanted Jongwoon to know everything about Ryeowook. He wanted Jongwoon knew all about me like he was craving every single thing about him. Ryeowook couldn’t take any of this anymore.

He felt he can’t face to go to work with Jongwoon was right in front of him in meters apart but he couldn’t do anything. He couldn’t hug him the way he used to within a week ago. He had Jongwoon in his arms, Jongwoon’s attentions, the touches, the sweet talk and the . Yes, Ryeowook was hungry to be touched again. And it was torturing him with the fact he wasn’t allowed to get closer to the café.

Jongjin called him today and asked him to meet at the bookstore after 1 PM. He wondered. Did Jongjin come because Jongwoon told him? Did Jongjin come because Jongwoon missed him? Did Jongjin come to have his eyes to Ryeowook and reported to Jongwoon? Or the worst, did Jongjin come to share his anger for what he did to Jongwoon?

He was waiting for the clock to be at 1 PM with some nerves on his heart…

Sungmin was still helping him to do some books arrangement with his brother, Sungjin, who came to help. Ryeowook was careless about it. He was thanking to those brothers for helping out but his mind went blank and all he could think was the possibilities about why Jongjin wanted to see him. After ten minutes or so, he saw familiar shape entered the store. He shuttered.

“Hi Jongjin!”

“Hi Ryeowook!”

We shook our hands and a hug. “How are you?”

“I’m alive. I go to work and face some book deliveries, so I guess I am okay. Or you can say I’m trying to be okay”, Ryeowook tried his best to answered the question.

“You look like , Ryeowook. Don’t you lie about it!!” Sungmin yelled behind me. “He’s so lost without Jongwoon, Jongjin. Why don’t you take Jongwoon along with you?”

Without warning, I screamed to Sungmin, “LEE SUNGMIN!!! Shut up! How could you say to bring Jongwoon along? He doesn’t want to see me again. Why can’t you understand?”.

Jongjin shivered with my answers but slowly he said something that made me shocked. “I guess Jongwoon regrets for saying bad things to you. He looks awful since the day he came after the date. Even he doesn’t bother to eat. He drinks coffee all the times. He seems stuck somewhere when he tries to finish his thesis. Guess your presence he longs the most”.

Ryeowook didn’t make any movements. His eyes shocked when he heard about Jongwoon. He still went for work or shopping groceries when he needed to. He didn’t forget to eat even all the food now taste blend to me. He can sleep even not as well as he had Jongwoon with me. His life seems back to the 8 years without hope after I let Jongwoon leave.

“Jongwoon also have terrible dark circles under his eyes and it’s almost every day I caught his eyes swollen red or sobbed from crying. You two really need to talk. I’m worry about him, Ryeowook. Please help me!”.

“ummmm… but Jongwoon said he hates me. He said what happened between us is a mistake. I keep telling myself to stop hoping because the more I hope Jongwoon back, the more it hurts me”, I said suddenly with tears in my eyes.

Jongjin came closer and give me a hug, “can I talk to you alone?”. Ryeowook nodded.

We both went to the back of the store. When he got to the door, he bumped to Sungjin. Sungjin shocked and I saw Jongjin confused, like he didn’t know what to do. Then I sat face to face to Jongjin, I saw him closely. “So the guy at school you told me about is Sungjin?”, I asked him. Jongjin looked surprise but few seconds later, he nodded. “do you like him? You said you already have a girl, right?”, I asked once again. He remained silent for a while. I was betting he did confuse about his heart.

“he said he likes me, Ryeowook. I don’t know why he said it even he knew I have a girl already. Aaaaand…..”

“and what???”

“he kissed me after he told me he likes me. he said he’ll give me times to think and then he kissed me.”

“did you return the kiss?”

“at first, I don’t know what to do but I didn’t push him away. Then after a minute, I returned his kiss and we kissed I don’t know for how long…”

“Well, then its you the one who can decide everything. If the girl makes you happy and you still can be you when you’re with her, then stay with the girl. But if you settle with Sungjin, then spend some times with him. Just to get to know more between you two. Can you do it?”

Jongjin silence for a while… “I guess I can. Please don’t tell Jongwoon about this, Ryeowook.”

“Relaaaax… my lips are sealed. You can trust me! Beside, Jongwoon doesn’t seem want to talk to me.”

“He has the same thought as you, Ryeowook. He said you won’t talk to him again since the accident…..”

“Stop it, Jongjin! I don’t wanna talk about it anymore. It’s all in the past and I hope it stays as my past”, I stopped Jongjin when he tried to talk about what I said to Jongwoon.

“But you have to admit. Even both of you think the same thing! You two meant for each others. Why can’t you both try to talk?”, Jongjin tried to give an advice.

“I’m afraid he will push me away cause the last time when I stopped him, he pushed me away and he told me not to get to him anymore. It’s hurting me, Jongjin”, I started to feel tears went out of my eyes, remembering the pain that I have now.

“Both of you are so lost! Admit it! He needs you as much as you need him”, Jongjin seemed uncomfortable when he saw me cry.

“You know, Ryeowook. You’re as miserable as Jongwoon. God, I think I have to do something to help you both!”, he said with certainty.

“I guess I know what to do”, he added after he stayed silence during I cried.

♥ Y E W O O K ♥

-JONGWOON-

I saw Jongjin came back across the street, had his bag on the back and light steps took him closer to the café. As he entered, he nodded to me and move straight to the spot where he uses to stay. I felt my head spinning and heavy, that’s why I already text Hyukjae that I won’t come to the class. As I moved closer to the cashier spot, Jongjin told me in sudden, “hyung, just have a rest now. Try to sleep! Your dark circle is really bad. You’re such a mess! “yaaa! Shut up! Where have you been? You’re gone for hours”, Jongwoon tried his best to smile.

I was so shocked with his answer. “I talked to Ryeowook!”.

“You whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat???”.

“I said, I’ve talked to Ryeowook. Like you already know, I love talking to him, right? Why? Are you jealous?”

“NO! Why would I? It’s not even my business!”, I said, tried my best to hide my jealousy and Jongjin seemed know about it.

“Did I say that I hugged him for, I don’t know. I can’t remember how long I hugged him. And you’re right. The longer we look at him, the more we realize how cute he is”, Jongjin with his smirked and winked at me.

I felt my tension was heating up. I can’t even imagine Ryeowook’s hands on the other bodies. I should be the one who owns him and I would give myself only for him. My head went dizzy as hell. I didn’t hear any more words from Jongjin. All I wanna do now was hugging my pillow and wish it was Ryeowook’s body.

Morning came without a warning. My stomach crumbled, wanted to be filled. I tried to stand up, held on everything I could reach and tried to walk out the room. It was still in the dark. I saw the clock and it was 6 AM so no wonder the lights were still turned off. I opened the fridge, grabbed a bottle of milk and drank it as much as I could. “You look like a real mess, hyung. Don’t you know that?”, a voice came in sudden behind my back. I turned over and I saw Jongjin woke up. “I’m fine. I’m always fine. Just go prepare yourself, I’ll make some breakfast”, I told Jongjin disappear from me to prepare himself before he went for school. “Its okay, hyung. Just go rest!”, he replied, declined my help. “I can’t. I have to finish my 3rd chapter before I go finish the 4th one. I’ll meet my mentor at Friday so I have to try to finish it start today”, I told him my reason.

“At least have something to eat, hyung. You haven’t eaten properly since you back from Ryeowook’s house”, he said before he left me to the bathroom. I didn’t make any movements when I heard it. My heart had twinge in pain. “Ryeowook……….”, I speak softly.

Around 7.15, Jongjin made his way out of the café. I walked him out and waited him till he disappeared from the block. I stared across the street to see the bookstore, even I knew it wouldn’t be open around the hour. But then I saw someone opened the front door. A girl went out first then Ryeowook followed her, to walk her out like I did to Jongjin. My eyes went wide and mouth opened without I realized. I couldn’t believe anything I saw with my own eyes. Suddenly I breath heavily, my chest went up and down.

He laughed, kissed her goodbye on her cheeks and waved as she left Ryeowook at the door. His smiled beautifully, the smile that used to be mine only. But he looked happy.

I got nervous when he turned his face to the café and looked at me. He nodded and smiled awkwardly. Totally different with what he gave to the girl earlier. But he kept staring at me. There was a sad emotion on his face even I wasn’t sure about it. I made my first move just to stand properly but then I saw Ryeowook made his steps back into the bookstore. I stunned. I was hoping we would see each other for some minutes but he went after made some waves to me. “Ryeowook has moved on”, I said to myself.

I tried my best to focus on my thesis, even it was hard to do it. Ryeowook really took my attention, especially when I saw him this morning. “What Jongjin said about Ryeowook is true. Maybe Ryeowook is already moving on”. My eyes became hot in sudden, tears filled my eyes. I cried again.

♥ Y E W O O K ♥

-RYEOWOOK-

“How could he stand there? I haven’t seen him in days. Why he has to be there? Why do I need to look at him? You stupid, Ryeowook! He must be thinking that I still want him to be with me. God, I do need him!!”, Ryeowook sighed, held his forehead. “Jongwoon r