She heard something. She was sure there was something moving.

Opened one of her eyes, she could only see darkness of her bedroom. She then blinked a few times to gain some consciousness. But even though she wasn’t fully awake yet, her ears were sharp. She heard things. Yeah, she surely heard things.

Carefully, trying her best not to make any sounds, she got off the bed. Her bedroom door was slightly opened. She frowned. Someone had gone here earlier? In this late hour? She didn’t really know what time it was but judging from the lack of voices, she was sure it was late already. She must’ve overslept earlier.

Sneaking in the space of her opened door, she exited her bedroom. The whole house was dark, but the voice was clear enough. It came from the kitchen, it seemed. Realizing she had no weapons by her hands, she clenched her fists. One or two punches would make it.

She finally reached the kitchen. But when she was about to turn on the light, someone else was faster.

Brightness filled the room instantly and as she narrowed her eyes, a loud voice surprised her even more,

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!”

She startled, “Fany?!”

There she was. A young girl standing beside the dining table, wearing her pink pyjamas and a pink birthday hat, grinned at her. She extended both her arms, but the surprised woman could only frown in silence.

“Happy birthday, Jessi!” She repeated, lowering her volume this time even though it still sounded loud.

Jessica hissed, “I’ve told you not to make any noises at night!”

“But it’s your birthday already!” Tiffany pointed at the clock hanging on the wall, it showed a half past midnight, “And I just want to surprise you!”

The birthday woman kept silent.

Tiffany pouted, “Jessi… don’t be mad?”

“Alright.” Jessica gave up and took her turn to extend her arms, “Happy birthday to me.”

“Yay!” Tiffany ran to Jessica and hugged her tight, “Happy birthday Jessi~ happy birthday Jessi~ happy birthday, happy birthday, happy birthday Jessi!”

It was April 18^th already, indeed. There was a cake on the dining table. After they hugged, Jessica gave Tiffany a kiss on her temple, and they sat across each other with the cake in between. Tiffany also had prepared a lighter and she lit up the candles.

Jessica cringed at the numbers.

“You should’ve bought usual candles instead of these, you know…” She mumbled.

Tiffany giggled, “Why? You can’t accept the fact that you’re officially twenty-nine years old now, Jessi?”

“Don’t say that out loud. I don’t like being old.”

“It’s not that old, though…”

“Compared to you?”

“Well…” A louder laugh, “you’re indeed old compared to me, Jessi.”

When Tiffany told her to make a wish before she blows the candles, Jessica obeyed. She clasped her hands together and closed her eyes, wishing the same wish since many birthdays before. After that she blew the candles and both of them clapped their hands. Tiffany didn’t forget to put another birthday hat on Jessica’s head, even though it was kind of too small.

Jessica was about to take a bite of the cake before Tiffany playfully smeared the white puffy cream all over the older woman’s cheek. The kitchen was soon filled with laughs and shrieks as they continued doing that to each other.

It was a happy birthday indeed.

-

“Hey.”

Tiffany felt someone elbowed her, and when she opened her eyes, it was Jessica. She looked around and remembered she was in the car, going to school. She was so sleepy because of Jessica’s birthday celebration earlier. Tiffany fell asleep on the way, and now they had arrived at the school.

“Huh? We’re here already?” Tiffany rubbed her eyes and yawned.

Jessica ruffled Tiffany’s dark hair with a low chuckle, “I’m going to blame you if you sleep at school today.”

“Whatever. You liked my surprise anyway, didn’t you?”

“Yeah, I did. Thank you again.”

“I knew it, see you later!”

The younger girl pulled Jessica’s collar for a kiss on the cheek before she got off the car. Jessica smiled as she eyed Tiffany, seeing the girl meeting her usual friends and walking together to inside. Tiffany had a lot of friends, both guys and girls, and that kind of surprised Jessica, since the fact that she switched schools a lot. Jessica sometimes felt guilty because of that, but Tiffany assured her, saying she was okay.

After making sure Tiffany was already inside, Jessica fixed her seatbelt. She was about to continue driving before her phone buzzed. The screen showed, “KIM”. Jessica inhaled. But she answered it.

“Hello?”

“Hey-ho, happy birthday!”

Jessica chortled, “Didn’t expect you’d remember.”

“I highlighted my calendar for you, Jung. Give me some credits.” Kim cleared , “Twenty-nine years old now, yes?”

“Don’t mock me. You’re not any younger.”

“At least I deserve a thank-you for congratulating you.”

“Fine. Thank you, Kim. Happy now?”

“Very.” She said in a flat tone, “Okay birthday woman, status please.”

“I’m in front of her school,” Jessica turned her head to her right, to the school building, “she just got in about three minutes ago. GPS is on. Earphone is attached. Everything is settled. And she’s fine, just a little bit sleepy.”

“Tipsy?”

“Sleepy, Kim. I said sleepy. Fix your ears.”

“Ah right, sorry. I drank too much caffeine, yo! Unlike you, I don’t have any time to sleep!”

“It goes for me too, Kim. Stop complaining.” Jessica rolled her eyes, “Is there anything else? I need to get going.”

“Err… actually, Boss wants to meet you.”

“Wait, what?! What for?! Did I do something--”

“No, you didn’t. Calm down, Jung. It’s just… did you forget something?”

“What? What did I forget?”

Kim sighed, “Alright, you clearly forgot. Now, how old are you?”

“Why are you mocking me again--”

“Just answer it!”

“I’m twenty-nine, Kim!”

“Okay, if you turn twenty-nine this year, that means she will turn…?”

Jessica paused to count. After that she let out a deep, heavy breath as she muttered, “…”

“I know, right.” Kim chuckled, “It’s about time, Jung. That’s why Boss wants to meet you. In an hour, well he said he can tolerate two, in here, also with me and the others.”

The birthday woman sighed. She brought her free hand to her forehead, rubbing it slowly. Time had passed so fast, too fast, until the point she didn’t even remember. Realizing the fact now made her lost the birthday blast she had earlier. And it also had slapped her hard because she realized how she was lacking all these past years. She could’ve remembered it if she counted well. But she, as expected, enjoyed this life too far to notice that.

“Jung? You’re there?”

“Yeah, I’m still here.”

“Hey, I’m sorry for ruining your birthday. But it’s Boss’ order, so…”

“No, it’s fine. It’s my fault, I forgot. I didn’t count.”

“Well, humans forget sometimes. You’re still a human after all.” She laughed an empty laughter, “Tell you what, I’m not going to say anything about this to Boss later. This is a secret between us. You’re lucky it’s your birthday.”

“Yeah, thanks. He’d kill me if he knew I forgot.”

“Mm-hmm. See you later then, I guess?”

“Sure, see you later, Kim. And oh, just so you know, I’m craving for nachos these days.”

She could tell Kim was rolling her eyes, “Geez, using your birthday, huh? Fine. I’ll prepare nachos. Happy?”

“Very. Bye now, Kim.”

She hung up and threw her phone to the passenger seat. Her grip to the steering wheel was so tight until her knuckles turned pale. She needed some time. She had promised Tiffany for a dinner later, so she had to buy some stuffs first. Ignoring her worried mind, she peeked at her watch before she started driving.

Two hours it is.

-

“So I was in the middle of the hall before he suddenly bumped into me and started saying things I didn’t understand! How many times do I have to say that I don’t like him? I’m going crazy! He’s so annoying and…”

A small smile formed on Jessica’s face as she listened to Tiffany’s blabbering. She was busy cooking their dinner, with Tiffany waiting for her, sitting on the dining table. The young girl seemed had a pretty bad day. And the same thing went for Jessica too. If it wasn’t because of Tiffany’s surprise this morning, she would say it was her worst birthday.

She didn’t really know who to blame, though. Kim, her Boss, or herself.

“What should I do, then?” Tiffany asked to Jessica, who had her back facing the former.

Jessica didn’t answer.

Tiffany paused before, “Jessi?”

“Hmm?”

“You’re not listening, are you?”

“No, I’m listening.” Jessica turned off the stove, “And I think you’d know what to do, since this isn’t the first time a boy going crazy over you.”

“You make it sounds like it had happened thousand times already.”

Jessica turned around with the foods, “But it’s true, isn’t it?”

As Jessica settled the foods and plates on the dining table, their talk about Tiffany’s boys ended. Jessica was never interested in Tiffany’s stories about boys. She listened, but she didn’t give any advice or whatsoever. Jessica said Tiffany was a grown-up to think about it herself, and Jessica wasn’t experienced enough to tell her what to do.

“But Jessi,” Tiffany started again.

“Hmm?” Jessica hummed with full.

“When are you getting married?”

Jessica stopped munching and lifted her head to stare at Tiffany, in silence.

“What?” Tiffany backed away, “You’re twenty-nine, and I want to have an in-law too.”

A chuckle, “If I’m married, who’s going to take care of you, huh?”

Tiffany froze. Her smile slowly faded.

“It doesn’t matter, marriage can wait. You still need me, so don’t tell me to get married. Because it won’t happen.”

The younger girl kept silent. Jessica was right. She still needed her. She was too young to live apart from Jessica. And to think about it, she wasn’t ready to see Jessica taking care of someone else that’s not her. It was selfish, but true. She had to hold a scoff at the thought. She had been selfish all this time, though. Why acknowledged it just now?

“I’m sorry…”

Hearing Tiffany’s soft whimper made Jessica once again, lifted her head. She gulped her food and put the spoon and fork down. She suddenly remembered about today’s event she had with her Boss, Kim, and the others. The thought made her tense. She had to hold her urge to let out her frustration.

“Jessi? Why are you staring at me like that?”

Jessica didn’t answer. She just shook her head and looked down, with her palm on her head. Tiffany inhaled a breath. She knew exactly there was something. Jessica’s gestures when she hides something, Tiffany noticed it. She brought her hand to Jessica’s temple, rubbing it gently. Jessica calmed down a little bit by her touch.

“What is it?”

“It’s nothing.” Jessica caught Tiffany’s hand and held it.

“It doesn’t seem like it, though?”

The older woman sneered, “Well… just something about my job, it’s okay.”

“Alright…”

Tiffany pulled back and continued eating. Typical Jessica. There was no use for her to ask further. Jessica would only brush it off and changed the topic. It mostly did on Tiffany. So now she gave up without even trying.

“Hey.” Jessica called again.

“Yeah?”

“Sleep with me tonight.”

The young girl raised her eyebrows, “Eh? Sleep with you?”

Jessica nodded.

“Why is that?”

“Just because. It’s still my birthday. I can ask anything I want.”

A giggle, “I thought we had agreed to sleep apart, no?”

Jessica nodded again. She still remembers it clearly. Years ago, when Tiffany insisted to sleep in her own room, without Jessica’s accompany. And Jessica half-heartedly said yes, after a long argument with the younger. Since then they never slept together. Even when they stayed at hotels, Tiffany always asked for a double bed room.

“Well, if you don’t want to then--”

“No, it’s okay.” Tiffany said, munching her food, “We’re sleeping together tonight, and nights after if you still want to. And to think about it, I kind of miss it.”

“Okay. That’s good to know.”

When Tiffany smiled her best smile, Jessica had to grasp her spoon and fork tightly at the sight. And when Tiffany didn’t notice, Jessica’s smile faltered. How she wished she could just tell Tiffany all she should’ve known. But who was she to do that? She had her limits and it tortured her, caged her, until she couldn’t break apart.

Then again, it’s her life she had chosen. She got no one to blame.

****