“I screwed up, Zitao.  I screwed up.”  Luhan tells Zitao through the phone.  It’s been two days since the ‘second incident’ and Luhan’s conscience is already killing him.  Chopping him to pieces.  Burning him like hell.

“What the hell did you do this time, Luhan?”  Zitao asks, running a hand through his hair.

“I only wanted to make him come back, but I ended up forcing him in the staff room.  I’m such a horrible person.”  Luhan replies.

“Well, at least you know you are.”  Zitao says and sighs.  Luhan is such an idiot.

“What do I do now?  I hurt him, Zitao, and that’s the thing I’m scared of doing the most.”

“Well, first of all, apologize.  Then go and try to figure how you really feel about him.”

“Huh?  I don’t get it.”

“I don’t get you.  Don’t worry, Luhan, you won’t stay an idiot forever.  Someday, you’ll eventually realize it.  Let’s just hope that it’s not too late by then.”  Zitao says, and then ends the call.  He’s currently in the sweets shop that their family owns, staring at the empty store.  He goes back to playing his guitar when the door suddenly opens, revealing a very angry Sehun.

“Hey, Sehun.  What’s up?”  Zitao asks, suddenly feeling very shy.

“What the hell is his problem, Zitao?!”  Sehun exclaims, the anger in his voice very evident.

“Who?”  Zitao replies, even though he already has a feeling who exactly Sehun is talking about.

“Lu ing Han, Zitao!  How dare he do that to Minseok? Does he even know what he did?!”

“I’m pretty sure he did, Sehun.  Now calm down, I’ll get some—“

“What the ?!  I won’t calm down until someone fixes this!  No one treats one of my best friends like that, no matter who the person is!”

“Sehun, Luhan already called and told me about it.  He said he’s sorry and he’ll make it up to Minseok.”  Zitao says, hoping to calm down the other boy.

“That’s not enough, Zitao.  Minseok’s already at his limit, he’s not ing Superman, okay?!  There’s only so much he can endure when it comes to Luhan, and he’s had enough.  This time sorry just doesn’t cut it.”  Sehun says, glaring at Zitao.

“Sehun, please calm down. We’ll fix this, okay?”

“I can’t do this, Zitao.  I can’t just watch him to that to Minseok.  I can’t hang around with you guys anymore, it’ll just cause trouble, I know it.  I might do something bad to Luhan if I ever see him again.  And it’s not just me; Yeol feels the same way too.”

“Sehun, please, I’ll tell Luhan…”  Zitao says, his voice pleading.

“I’m sorry, Zitao.  We can’t take this anymore; we have to be there for Minseok too.”  Sehun says, before he leaves.

“This .  I dunno what to do anymore.”  Chanyeol says, leaning against the counter.

“May I ask what the problem is?”  Yifan asks while staring at Chanyeol’s face.

“Luhan’s hurting Minseok, but we don’t know what we should do.  We know that Minseok really loves Luhan, but he’s already at his limit.  I’m scared that if Luhan does something stupid to Minseok again Minseok won’t be able to take it anymore and just, I dunno, disappear.  Run away, or something.”  Chanyeol replies, palming his face.

“Then why don’t you guys talk to Luhan about this?  He at least must feel bad or something.”  Yifan replies.

“Yeah, but we’re afraid that if we ever see Luhan’s face again then we might end up killing him or something.  Seriously, that kid has hurt Minseok in so many ways.”

“I guess Jongdae and Joonmyeon were wrong, then.”

“Huh?”

“They said that Luhan actually loves Minseok, but is too stupid to actually realize it.  Maybe they’re just confusing lust for love.”

“There could be a chance that what they said is true; I mean, Zitao did say that Luhan’s been thinking of Minseok a lot recently.”

“Luhan is such an idiot.”

“Yeah, but still… even if there’s a possibility that Luhan is just being an idiot, there’s no real way of knowing if he can still be cured of his stupidity and .  I mean, he’s with Yixing, for goodness’ sakes!”

“Jongdae mentioned that there was something that Joonmyeon was not telling him, he thinks that it’s about Yixing.”

“Really?”  Chanyeol asks as Yifan hands him his order.  “Either way, I hope Minseok feels better now.  Thanks, Yifan, seriously.  You don’t know how much this means to me.”

“It’s nothing, really.  I mean, making coffee is my job.”

“No, I mean, this.  You know, the whole talking thing.  I dunno but, it’s always easier for me to handle things about my best friends when I talk to you.  It’s like, you relieve me of all my worries, or something like that.”  Chanyeol replies, blushing.

“What the actual , Lu!”  Zitao exclaims once he enters the penthouse and sees Luhan watching TV.

“What, Zitao?”  Luhan replies, turning down the volume of the TV.

“You should go fix that problem of yours right now!”  Zitao replies, glaring at Luhan.

“Well, I’m trying to!  I just dunno how I would do it, yet!”  Luhan replies, standing up.

“, Luhan!  Then figure it out!  Sehun just walked out on me a while ago!  He said that he and Chanyeol don’t want anything to do with us anymore!”

“Well, I’m sorry if your boyfriend walked out on you…”

“Shut up, Lu!  Why don’t you swallow your freakin’ pride and just apologize?!  What’s so difficult about that?”

“BECAUSE IT’S MINSEOK, DAMNIT!  I’m always at a loss for words when it comes to him and, whenever I try to do or say something, I always screw it up!  Do you want me to mess things up more?!”  Luhan retorts and Zitao is rendered speechless.  “I just want things to be normal between the two of us.  It’s always so hard for me to figure things out when it comes to Minseok that I always end up hurting him.  Why am I like that, Zitao?”  Luhan replies, slumping down on the couch.  Zitao sits beside him and ruffles his hair, causing Luhan to look at him.

Minseok enters XOXO during his break and goes straight to counter.  He knows that he’ll end up hurting himself more if he continues to feel this way towards Luhan so he’s going to let go.  Even if he knows that it’s going to be a long and painful journey, the light feeling of freedom in the end is probably going to be his reward.  He knows that he’ll never truly forget Luhan or his feelings for him, but he knows that he should at least try.  And what better way to say everything without really saying anything than giving flowers?

“Hey, Min.  What’s up?”  Taemin asks from the counter once he sees Minseok approaching.

“I need to send someone some flowers.”  Minseok replies, scanning his memory for the perfect flowers to give away his message.

“Okay, what do you need?”  Taemin asks, taking out a pen and a small notebook.

“Just one of each of these flowers, okay?  Uhm… globe amaranth, azalea, baby’s breath, pink camellia, pink carnation, cyclamen, forget- me- not, gladiolus, heliotrope, white hyacinth, michaelmas daisy, myrtle, rosemary, blue salvia, sweet pea, and a magenta zinnia.”  Minseok replies, counting off the flowers.

Taemin is silent for a while as he takes in the flowers.  “Minseok, why are you saying goodbye?”

Minseok chooses not to answer the question anymore.  “Send them individually packaged, okay?  Not in a bouquet.”

“Okay, but… for whom?”  Taemin asks, not sure if he even wants to hear the answer.

Luhan comes home from the restaurant to find Yixing home.  He walks in to the penthouse, dropping his bag on the couch and heads straight for the bedroom.  He’s currently listening to his iPod so he doesn’t hear them like he normally would.  That’s why Luhan is shocked speechless when he opens the door, only to find Yixing with another guy in their bed.

“Luhan!  I—“ Yixing starts once he realizes that Luhan is actually there.  Luhan just stares at the two of them, realizing that the other guy is actually Kim Kibum, before going out of the bedroom.  He heads straight for Minseok’s bedroom and shuts the door, locking it.

Luhan lies down on Minseok’s bed, inhaling the younger boy’s scent.  He wishes that Minseok’s here with him, keeping him warm in an embrace, and telling him that everything’s going to be okay.  He doesn’t cry because he doesn’t deserve to, after everything that’s he’s to Minseok.  He actually deserves this kind of punishment for all he knows. 

“Luhan!  Open the door!  Please, we need to talk!”  He can hear Yixing pleading from the other side of the door.

“Go away.”  Luhan whispers.  “I only want to see Minseok.”

“Luhan!  That’s it, I’m getting the keys, damnit!”

Luhan waits for the door to open and for Yixing to come in.  He’s not really sure what’s going to happen, but he’s hoping that Yixing would hurt him.  Hurt him, beat him up or something like that, so that he can be punished for everything that he’s done to Minseok.  He hears the jingle of keys and prepares for the brutal onslaught that’s going to happen.

The door opens.  But instead of revealing a very angry Yixing, it reveals a very distraught Yixing.

“Luhan, please, let’s talk about this.”  Yixing pleads, approaching the bed.  Luhan burrows further into the bed, wrapping the sheets around him imagining that day when Minseok was still sleeping soundly beside him.

“There’s nothing to talk about anymore, Yixing.”  Luhan says, taking another whiff of the Minseok-scented pillow.

“Yes, Luhan, there is.  You have to choose.”  Yixing says, putting a hand on Luhan’s thigh.  Luhan brushes it off, sitting up and glaring at Yixing.

“Choose?  Isn’t it you who’s supposed to choose?”

“Nope, it’s you, Luhan.  You have to choose, you can’t have us both.”

“Who’s us?”

“Me or Minseok.  Choose, Luhan, choose.”

“The hell I’ll choose!  Why the hell do I have to choose between my boyfriend, if you still are, and my best friend?”

“Luhan, he’s not just your servant or best friend or whatever and you know it.”

“NO!  I don’t know it!  I don’t get you, Yixing!”

“At first I thought that you two were like that because you’ve known each other since childhood but then I realized that you weren’t like that with Joonmyeon.  That’s when I got it, Luhan.”

“Of course I won’t be like that with Joonmyeon.  Suho’s different!”

“Really?  How?”

“He’s not Minseok!”

Yixing chuckles and Luhan just stares at him in shock.  “See, Luhan.  That’s what I’m talking about.  It’s always been Minseok, Luhan.  It’s never been me; you’re just too dense to realize it.”

Luhan just stares at Yixing and then lies back down on the sheets.  He closes his eyes, trying to remember everything that’s happened between Minseok and him.  He remembers all the happy and sad memories, and realizes that they’ve been through so much together.  He remembers Minseok in this very same bed with him, sleeping soundly, so dead to the world.  Luhan remembers that kiss in the staff room, and how he’ll always feel weird whenever he’s around Minseok, like he can’t breathe.  He remembers how hard it is to talk to Minseok, when it’s always been easy when it comes to others.

Then, it suddenly, clicks.  Everyone’s been saying it, telling him to stop being and idiot and open his eyes.  Joonmyeon’s said it, Zitao too, and hell, now Yixing is saying it!  The reason why it’s always been about Minseok; pleasing him, keeping him occupied so that he won’t leave, just being with him; Luhan realizes it and mentally slaps himself.  What hurts the most is that Minseok knows, Minseok knows that he loves Luhan and has been stuck with feeling that Luhan doesn’t love him when he really does.  He registers Yixing’s voice telling him once again, “Who is it, Luhan?  Me or Minseok?”

It’s been an hour since his shift in the store ended and now, Minseok is on his way home.  He thinks of the flowers, and how Luhan would feel when he receives them.  Would he get the message?  Minseok told himself a while ago that he will just wait for Taemin’s call, confirming that he’s delivered the flowers, before he completely lets go of Luhan.

He turns the corner and reaches the alley where the back entrance to the apartment is.  He always did use that entrance because the stairwell there is nearer his room, and because the door there is in better condition.  He sees his window from his current location and mentally makes a note to buy some duct tape later so that he can cover the hole.

All of a sudden, someone grabs him from behind, trying to yank his bag away from him.  He struggles, trying to knock out the attacker.  My whole life is in there!  His wallet, phone, and keys are in there, so he really fights for it.  The attacker manages to trip him, making him fall to the ground, his bag flying and landing a few feet away from him.  He manages to get on his knees before he feels something hit the side of his head, sending him back down.  He cannot move, and he sees the attacker closing in on his bag.  He can feel the blood on the side of his face, and coughs a little, tasting blood on his tongue.  God, please help me!  But it’s too late; the attacker finally has his bag and is currently running away, leaving Minseok on the ground.  He tries to call for help but he can’t move, much less talk.  He just lies there, unmoving, praying to whoever is out there for help.  But all of a sudden, he’s feeling very dizzy and his eyes are closing, the soft snow lulling him to sleep.

He dreams of Luhan.

A/N: I'm back!! I apologize for the long wait and for the mistakes in this chapter.  Once again, comments are welcome.  I hope to post the next chapter within this week. (>‿◠)✌