From:
[email protected]

To:
[email protected]

Subject: My boss is a satanic drugdealer who happens to befriend my love.

Dear Lee Chaerin,

It had been a week since my first day of being Satan's secretary. He wasn't as satanic as I thought he was, although he wasn't that nice like I had hoped he would be either.

Few days ago I had been told by Minzy that Taeyang ( YES THAT HOT SINGER OH MY GOD ) would be coming to our company to shoot a CF. I had been very flabbergasted and excited and elated and asdfghjkladajkf. I couldn't stop smiling and giggling, hence receiving those demonic glares from Satan. Moreover, I had managed to eavesdrop Satan's conversation with my love ( Taeyang, of course ) on the phone. ( I can hear his conversations on phone and vice versa. What is this awesome technology called?)

"Yo, Bae!! You gonna come over tomorrow? It's been a-ing-while, dude! Yeah yeah life's been okay, how are ya?"

"I've been good, Ji. Yeah I will be coming over! Thanks for the offer. I've always wanted to do the CFs from your company!" As expected from my love, he didn't utter a single word of profanity throughout the conversation. I still couldn't believe Satan scolded me for me for makin some minor grammar mistakes, remembering the fact that he talked like a homeless beggar tryin to be all swaggie and "yo ma homies". They talked about stuffs then Satan ended the conversation. I didn't know how did he know I eavesdropped his conversation but he suddenly said through the phone line "Come over and bring me my ing reports now!" ( By the way, I had given up censoring the bad words, I hear those words everyday I'm used to them now ).

So long story short, I handed him the reports. This time he said nothing and he seemed to be satisfied with the reports.
"You've improved.." he said while nodding contentedly.
I wasn't even that bad before, that little prick. Now that I think about it, he had always spoken to me informally, I knew he's my boss but I was way way way older than him.

"Thank you." I said and forced a sweet little smile.

"So,... you like Taeyang?" he suddenly asked.

"OH MY GOD YES. HE'S LIKE THE HOTTEST MAN OF THE CENTURY. HIS BICEPS AND TRICEPS AND ABS AND THAT KILLER SMI-" I realized Satan was lookin at me as if I had lost my mind. Well, I literally did. I coughed awkwardly and tried to regain my sanity.

"Yes, I'm quite a fan of him"

"Oh"

OH. OH. OH.

HE JUST SAID OH.

I would never ever get used to this. He always asked things out of curiosity then ended the conversation abruptly as if he had completely lost interest. We telepathically assumed that we had ended the topic.

"Mr.Park sent us an e-mail askin for a joint project."

"I had told him million times we weren't interested and would never be. Go write a refusal." he said as he wagged his finger at me, hushing me out. I bowed at him and left his office. 

I did think that Satan was secretly a drug dealer and also a druggie and also a . Probably a mafia too. And now my suspicion about him being a druggie had been confirmed. Next time I barge in, I guess he would be a y employee. Rich young guys nowadays..

At first, I was going to tell him that Taeyang was waiting for him outside. I was so nervous meeting Taeyang in person for the very first time that I forgot to knock. I barged into this office and witnessed him injecting something into his vein. One thing immediately came to mind. He's a druggie, that explained his seemingly never exhausted self. He once made me work till 1 a.m with him. Writing reports, replying e-mails,etc.. I swore I couldn't even lift my head up anymore at that time, I was very very sleepy and tired, but he seemed to be fine and fit. Although his hair was slightly disheveled, he was still as good-looking and fresh as ever.

Anyway, back to the main topic, I quickly bowed apologetically and closed the door. Few minutes later, he went out of his office, passing by my desk, looking at me in confusion.

"Why did you come to my office?"

"I'm sorry, sir. I didn't have any intention to interrupt your business." I stood up and bowed several times.

"What the hey.." he said as he raised his eyebrows.

"YO, JI" For the love of the universe and everything in it, Taeyang had just saved me from my misery. 

"Yo,man! Oh you, dude. Did you get a tattoo?" Satan's expression changed and he quickly approached Taeyang and pulled him into a hug. For the first time in forever, I saw him smile genuinely. He actually looked, uhm, decently good looking. They then went to Satan's office and stayed there for a very long time. I only got to go inside for a few seconds to serve Satan's black coffee and Taeyang's iced sweet tea. They seemed to be in a serious conversation, so even though I was curious I quickly went outside again. Very regretful. I tried to think of what they might be talkin about. What if Taeyang was secretly a drug dealer?  What if Taeyang's intention to come here was to sell some drugs to Satan? No no, How dare you to have a thought like that, Sandara Park. It's pretty obvious that Taeyang was a very nice man, unlike Satan. There had been rumours that he stayed away from liquors and parties, and I religiously believed that. Maybe Taeyang was telling Satan off. Maybe he was secretly a therapist, telling Satan to stop drugging. It's obvious that they were good friends, of course Taeyang would want to turn Satan into a civilized and kind-hearted person.

Yeah, that must be it, that must be it. Maybe when they went out later, Satan would smile and bow at me and started speaking formally to me. I glanced at the clock. It had been two hours and half, what took them so long?? I was dying to see Taeyang's handsome face! Arghh...

And because I was so bored, I decided to write you this e-mail. And why haven't you replied?? You had always replied me right away before :-(

XOXO,
Sandara Park