And there I was, standing in the wide-open doorway staring awkwardly into the eyes of the boy across the room. All of a sudden I no longer had the desire to record.

The regretfully inevitable moment had come and how I wished I could've at least had more time. Time for what exactly, I didn't even know anymore. I just knew that I didn’t want to be here. The thought of standing out in the pouring rain began to sound much better.

I hesitated a second, unaware of how I should react to unexpectedly bumping into the person I thought had been avoiding me. I decided to leave, persuading myself that the only reason I was doing so was because he was the first one here. I hastily reached for the doorknob. "Oh. I'm just going to g—."

"Wait!" Jungkook shot an open palm out in front of him, signaling me to stop and I froze, obeying reluctantly. He slowly walked forward, closing the door behind me before I had the chance to exit, the opportunity quickly falling out of my grasp. With a hand still pressed on the door, he practically pinned me against it. "You got my note, right?"

. . .

I lowered my eyes to avoid his, but it only left me to stare at his body, holding my breath at the fact that it was merely a few inches away from mine. He was close enough for me to admire, in detail, his smooth, protruding collarbones and his virtually flawless skin; I almost wanted to nip at it right then and there. He smelled pretty good too, like always; it was probably in his genes to naturally smell like flowers and strawberries on a daily basis.

"Oh... Yeah, I got it,” I finally answered.

I almost forgot that I stuffed the paper in my pants pocket before I left, although I don't remember why I had brought it with me in the first place. I should have burned it the second I found it, or better yet, the second I wrote it. Then none of this would even be happening right now and my secret would have stayed one. One big secret that would continue to eat up my insides. But hey, it's got to be better than what was to come.

Jungkook only nodded in acknowledgement before backing away and taking a seat in the chair he had previously occupied and I let out a sigh. He seemed uneasy, fidgeting in his seat as if trying to get comfortable on a jagged pavement. He gestured towards the chair beside him after seeing that I had not moved.

I didn't want to move. I didn't want to sit next to him. Just being alone with him in the same room freaked the hell out of me. I think this was the only time I've ever thought that way though, because I love hanging out with him. The whole situation was completely nerve-wracking. What is he going to say? What is he going to do? Has he told anyone else about this?

He continued to hold his gesture until I sat, which I wasn't planning on doing any time soon, but after a long while of mentally panicking, I unwillingly did, rolling the office chair out from under the desk and sitting a little more proper than normal. I scooted back a little, but not enough to make it look like I was distancing myself from him, although I actually was.

There was a long silence at first; I was searching my mind for the words I was trying to say, even though I had no idea what I should be saying. I didn't even know how to start off the conversation. How's it going? No. Funny seeing you here? No. I'm sorry? No.

The rain could still be faintly heard from inside, but the thick walls of the building muffled them to only seem like a light pitter-patter. The sound of it somewhat put me at ease, but not enough for me to strike up a conversation first.

I glanced at the younger male who seemed to be lost in deep thought, his eyes absently twinkling as they stared off into nothing, though a second later he abruptly snapped himself out of whatever he was thinking about and sat up straight. Is he as nervous as I am?

"That note...," he finally managed to articulate, his eyes roaming around the room. "I—."

"Listen, you don't have to tell me," I stopped him. Maybe if we just let this whole thing slide,  everything would go back to normal. "Let's just forget that anything ever ha—."

"Please hyung, let me finish." He swallowed then exhaled deeply. He paused a second, "I don't want to... forget."

Wait, what?

With my voice a little lower than before, I tried to search the other boy’s mind for answers. “What do you mea—.”

“I don’t want to forget reading that letter you wrote. I don’t want to forget finding out that you of all people like me,” he let out an incoherent sigh like he was relieved of a heavy burden.

From that moment I felt like making a run for it, dashing out the door and never turning back. However, my growing amount of curiosity kept me in my seat, plus my willingness to just get it over with. Besides, I didn't want to seem like a little coward who's afraid to face his own problems, because I wasn't. I can do this.

"...I-I don't understand. Why?" I was truly confused. Is he planning to blackmail me? Why would he— Unless... No, that can't be right. He'd never—

“The truth is…,” Jungkook breathed out, glancing down at his hands which were absently twiddling with each other then back up at me, “I like you, hyung. I’ve always liked you.”

At first, I simply sat there in shock, completely surprised at what he had just said. My eyes nervously darted everywhere across the room, focusing them on anything but the person sitting in front of me, but I knew for certain that his burning gaze was still on me, obviously waiting in anticipation for some sort of reply.

That was definitely not the answer I had been mentally preparing myself for. Not even for a split second did I ever consider this outcome to occur simply because it never does, except in movies or dramas which we all know strays from real life situations.

I didn’t exactly know what to say at this point. In my imagination, my fantasy never reached this part of the story. It somehow always ended with Jungkook living a happily ever after, but without me in the picture. In the end, reality always won, which is why I was racking my brain, trying to understand why a guy like him would ever fall for a guy like me.

To be honest, I had always thought that he and Taehyung had something going on between them, given that I knew he was gay or biual beforehand. Otherwise, I'd assume that he was just another hungry noona-chaser. Nevertheless, I started to get this warm feeling in my stomach as his words began to sink in. I think people call it butterflies. Yeah, that's it. The butterflies came back, flew around in my stomach and tickled my insides. Then another wave of doubt came and drowned me out of my mind, forcing me back to the real world. “You’re not… just saying this out of pity, are you?”

Please say no. Please say no.

Jungkook was known throughout our group for doing this, giving in to people and peer pressure. A little too often does he do or say something simply because he doesn't want to hurt other people's feelings. He can't say no; otherwise, he'd just feel bad about it later, especially if it involved something of importance, something as important as this current situation. He's too young and innocent to be so blunt about certain things. I prayed sincerely that this wasn't one of those times.

He once again sighed; this one had a clear hint of frustration mixed into it. “Please stop doubting my words. It’s hard enough having to confess to your face…,” Jungkook trailed off into an awkward silence, suddenly seeming shy about what he’d said.

Even after hearing that, I still looked at my dongsaeng questioningly, tilting my head slightly and quirking an eyebrow. I might have subconsciously scooted my chair a tad closer, but I can't really remember.

"Do I need to prove it to you?" he asked, leaning forward a bit in his chair. Although, he didn't give any time for me to answer, or even react to his question, before his lips were suddenly on mine.

I nearly gasped out loud at his action, my body all of a sudden stiffening. His lips were soft and tasted sweet, but before I knew it, they were gone. The kiss left as quick as it came and I sort of regretted not kissing back.

I slowly opened my eyes, which presumably closed themselves somewhere along the line during our short-lived kiss, and instantly met the maknae's gaze. He may have pulled away, but his face was still dangerously close. His cheeks were glowing bright red, and I'm pretty sure mine were too. I didn't need to look down to realize how close we'd gotten; I had already felt one of his knees in between both of mine.

"Do you believe me now?" He raised a teasing brow as the corners of his lips twitched upwards. The kiss apparently gave the kid much more confidence. I too even found myself at my calmest state, my mind no longer plagued with anxiety, but rather with contentment and maybe I even found some confidence of my own.

"I think I still need to be convinced," I half-whispered in reply. I leaned forward a little, anticipating another kiss.

He smirked before once again closing the gap between us as we shared another kiss, this one I determined to prolong. This time, I moved my lips to the rhythm of Jungkook's, snaking an arm around his neck to pull him closer, if 'closer' were even possible. I felt him smile against my lips and I couldn't help but smile too.

A while later, we finally broke apart and rested our foreheads against each other's, our warm breaths hitting each other's chins as we softly panted in unison.

"I love you, Kookie-ah," I looked into his eyes as I lightly squeezed his thigh with my other hand, which was already perched there for some reason.

"I love you too... Milk-hyung," Jungkook almost couldn't hold in his childish laughter as he spoke.

"What?" I asked, retreating my head back to look at him fully and maybe he'd catch the confused expression that plastered my face.

"Well, you call me Kookie like a cookie. So I should call you Milk since your skin is so white and smooth. You know, because we go together like milk and cookies?" The maknae answered using weird hand movements, a dorky smile decorating his features. Damn, that smile is contagious.

I ruffled his hair playfully while chuckling at his ridiculously cheesy nickname and explanation. "Your cute."