chapter THIRTEEN.

The second we pull into the driveway, Taeyeon is out of the car. She walks directly over to Sehun's. She was asking questions about him during the whole drive home. I caught my mother looking at me in the rearview mirror, one eyebrow raised. Taeyeon insisted we invite Sehun over for pizza "because well, after the meet, I'm sure he's starving." Sulli and I both pointed out that the meet was over six hours, giving sehun plenty of time to eat enough food to feed a small country, but she just waved the back of her hand at us as she hopped the flower bed separating our front lawn from the Oh's.

Sulli and I help Mom carry the pizzas and the flowers inside. She brought the flowers for Mrs Jo. Apparently when Mom called a couple of hours ago "just to see how things were going". Minseok and Hyoyeon had barricaded themselves at the top of the playscape in the backyard and were pelting Mrs Jo with toys whenever she came near.

"Thank you so much," Mom says, handing Mrs Jo the flowers and what I'm sure is a sizeable check. She walks her out while I slide the pizzas onto the counter.

Sulli pulls a stack of plastic plates out of one of the cabinets. "It is so much fun working with your mom," she says. "She knows so much about flowers. Did you know that if you put aspirin in the water before you add the flowers, they'll last longer?" I nod. "And if you want them to bloom faster, you put an apple near them?" She pauses and smiles. "Thanks for suggesting it,"

"It seems to be good for you."

She nods. "I think it's good for your mom too," she says. I wait for her to explain, but she just gives me the same Cheshire Cat grin Taeyeon's been giving me for days. She turns, leans against the counter, and looks at me. "Tell me the truth."

"About what?" I ask. I open the fridge to pull out juice, milk and lemonade.

"Soo Rin, I've known you for seven years. I know when you're lying. How was your date with Kim Jong In really?"

I sigh and look at her. "I don't know. I mean, it was fine."

"Fine and good," Sulli says.

"We just didn't have that much to say to each other."

"You seem surprised by that," she says. "What did you expect?"

"I don't know. Something," I say. "I mean he is Kim Jong In."

Sulli snorts, a habit she picked up from me. "Soo Rin, you're smarter than that."

I nod. "Yeah," I say. "I guess I'm not really his type."

"No," she says. "I'm not entirely sure he's your type."

"I don't think I have a type," I say. "I'm not that great at relationships."

"You want to know what I think?" Sulli asks.

"I'm not sure," I say. "Whenever people say that, they're about to tell you something bad."

"Not bad, just true," she says.

I put the carton of milk, the bottle of lemonade, and the bottle of apple juice on the counter. "Okay," I say. I take a deep breathe. "I'm ready."

Sulli laughs. "I think you like to sabotage yourself."

"What are you talking about?" I ask.

"The few times you've gone out with a guy, you do a pre-emptive strike so you can make sure you get away before he gets to close."

"I don't do that," I say. Sulli just looks at me. "When?"

"Jonghyun was too short. Jongkook's voice was too 'adenoidal.' Chanyeol didn't say the word robot correctly." She ticks them off on her finger as she lists them.

"But all of those things are true," I say. "Jonghyun is like five feet tall."

"He was thirteen," Sulli says. I wave my hand, dismissing her point.

"Jongkook constantly had to clear his throat and well, the robot thing was sort of minor, but it was a symptom of Chanyeol's larger problem which is that he's completely intolerable. And seriously. Have you ever considered what it would be like if I dated Chanyeol? I mean, I probably would have to visit the doctor once a week for an ear check up." This makes Sulli laugh.

"Maybe," she says. I frown at her, but before she can say anything else, the front door opens and Mom comes in, followed by Taeyeon and Sehun and the terrible twosome.

"Go wash up," Mom tells Minseok and Hyoyeon. They race up the stairs. "Use soap!" Mom yells. "I better go supervise," she says to me, smiling.

"Sehun was hungry," Taeyeon says.

"Sehun, have you ever not been hungry?" I ask.

"No," he says without having to think about it. "I'm pretty sure I'm always hungry. What are we having?" I nod toward the stack of pizza boxes at the end of the counter. "Awesome. I love Artie's."

Taeyeon tugs Sehun's sleeve, pulling him toward him toward the stack of boxes. She flips the top one open. "Look," she says. "It's a heart."

"I can see that," Sehun says, peering into the box. "But why is it a heart?"

"Soo Rin has a secret Valentine," Taeyeon says. I swear she actually swoons a little when she says it. "Isn't that romantic?'

Sehun pulls out onr of the pieces from the box and takes a bite out of it. "It's tasty," he says. Taeyeon rolls her eyes in my direction. Footsteps thud all the way down the stairs. Minseok tears around the corner followed closely by Hyoyeon.

"I want to sit by Sehun!" Hyoyeon yells, grabbing his free hand. She pulls him over to the table. Taeyeon is quick to claim the chair on the other side of Sehun, sliding it closer to him as she sits down. I grab the stack of pizza boxes over and place them in the middle of the table.

"I'll help," Sehun says, starting to get up, but Hyoyeon pushes him back down and climbs into his lap. I smirk, thinking Taeyeon is just an older and only slightly more subtle version of my little sister.

Mom comes down the stairs. Her hair is up in a ponytail and she's changed into jeans and a T-shirt. My mother is really pretty. She has the same brown hair as me, but hers is run through with gold. And where my eyes are sort of a milky brown, like chocolate milk, hers are such a dark shade of brown that they almost seem red. She comes up to me and puts her arm around my waist.

"This is nice," she says.

"Just a quiet dinner at the Kim's house," I say. She laughs as we watch Sulli dishing out slices of pizza to Minseok and Hyoyeon. Minseok flips his backwards and starts eating the crust first. Hyoyeon barely touches hers. She's too busy making sure Taeyeon knows Sehun is with her.

"You're my Valentine, right, Sehun?" Hyoyeon asks, glaring at Taeyeon.

"Stop pestering him," my mother says. She walks over and lifts Hyoyeon out of his lap and slides her into her own chair. I follow and sit in the last empty chair, between my mother and Sulli.

"Who's your Valentine?" Taeyeon asks Minseok.

He squints at her. "Valentine's Day is stupid," he says.

"Mommy! Minseok said a bad word," Hyoyeon says around a mouthful of pizza.

"But that's what Soo Rin said," Minseok says. It's suddenly quiet and everyone looks at me.

"I didn't say that," I argue, but I'm not that sure.

"You did too," Minseok says. His eyes start filling up with tears.

"Maybe you're right," I say softly. I put my slice of pizza back on my plate. Suddenly I don't feel much like eating. It's one thing to be cynical at my age, but when you're five? "Minseok," I say. "Maybe I was wrong. Maybe I was just being grouchy."

He looks at me for a moment, then smiles. "You are pretty grouchy," he says, making everyone laugh.

"Not all the time!" I say.

"Just when you wake up," Sulli says.

"And when you're hungry," Sehun points out.

"And when you're doing homework," Hyoyeon adds.

"When you're tired," Mom says.

"Or sick," Sehun says.

"Or hot," Taeyeon says.

"Or cold," Minseok says.

"Okay, okay," I say, holding up my hands. "But only then."

"But that's all the time," Hyoyeon says. This makes everyone laugh again. My cell phone goes off. It sounds like a herd of cows.

"Saved by the moo," I say, pushing away from the table. I look over at Sehun, who just smiles. I have yet to see him fiddling with my phone. I pick it up and look at the screen before putting it to my ear. "Hey, Changmin," I say.

"Guess who I just off the phone with?" Changmin asks.

"Umm..." I look at the ceiling.

"Forget it," Changmin says. "You're a lousy guesser. I just off the phone with the Food Network."

"Cool," I say, mostly because I don't know what else to say.

"They want to film a segment here!" he says.

"Wow," I say. "That's amazing. You must be psyched."

"No, Soo Rin, you don't understand," Changmin says. "They're going to be here in two days."

"That's soon," I say, stating the obvious. Everyone at the table is quiet and looking at me. I smile at them, then stare back down at the floor and listen.

"I need to stock the cases and clean the windows and clean the tables so they'll have room for the cameras and—" Changmin keeps listing all the things that need to happen.

"We'll help," I say. I look over at everyone sitting at the table. They all nod, making me smile. They don't even need to know what they are signing up for. They're in.

"That would be great Soo Rin. But listen, school comes first. I want you to make sure—"

"Changmin," I say. "I'm good. Remember, I'm the queen of organization."

"She's the queen of grouchy too!" Minseok yells.

Changmin starts laughing. "Okay, Queen Grouchy. Whatever time you and your cohorts can spare would be much appreciated.

"I'll see you tomorrow," I say. I click off and put down the phone. I take a deep breath.

"Well, tell us!" Taeyeon says. I laugh. Patient, she is not. I tell them all about the Food Network coming and Changmin freaking. "So do we get to be on television?" Taeyeon asks. I shrug.

"Whatever we can go to help," my mother says.

"Mom," I say. "You're busy too."

"I know," she says, standing up. "But I know you'd all help me if I needed it." She picks up two of the empty pizza boxes and walks with them into the kitchen.

"He asked if we could be there tomorrow," I say to Taeyeon who nods. "And Sulli, if you want to—"

"Of course. Once I finish sorting the ribbons and restocking the gift cards and dusting the vases." I smile. She clearly loves working for my mom.

"What about me?" Sehun asks. "I'm not so sure I can make candy but I'm not totally worthless."

"No," Taeyeon says. "You're not." Hyoyeon gives her a dirty look.

"I didn't know if you'd want to," I say.

"Count me in," he says. "Maybe they'll be some irregulars that need eating."

"I'll help," Hyoyeon says.

"Me too!" Minseok says, not wanting to be left out.

"The best way you two can help is to get changed into your pajamas," my mom says. Both Minseok and Hyoyeon start to protest, but Mom just points to the stairs. They slide out of their seats and head for their rooms. "I'll be up to tuck you in a few minutes."

"Can Sehun do it?" Hyoyeon asks.

"No, I'm sure Sehun—"

"I don't mind," Sehun says. "I'm pretty decent at the bedtime stories.

"I want a scary one," Minseok says.

"One with princess," Hyoyeon adds on.

"Scary princess story," Sehun says. "Got it."

"I'll help," Taeyeon says, smiling up at Sehun.

He shrugs. "As long as you're willing to do the voices." He pushes away from the table to follow Minseok and Hyoyeon.

"The what?" Taeyeon asks, following him to the stairs. Sulli and I laugh. We've heard Sehun's stories before. Every character has a different voice. Taeyeon is in for a treat.

Sulli and I help Mom clean up the kitchen. I listen as they talk about blooming times and which greenery goes better with which flowers. I scrape the plates and start loading the dishwasher. I look at Sulli as my mom talks, and see her smiling. She definitely seems better. I haven't heard her even mention Daehyun's name in a couple of days. My mother walks over to her calendar. Even though Sulli does it quickly, I see her sneak a look at her phone. She frowns at it before sliding it back into her pocket. She looks over at me, but I pretend that I'm intent on cleaning off a stray bit of cheese from one of the plates. I guess even when people seem like they're fine, they might not be. They're just pretending. I wonder if everyone is. If everyone's heart is broken to some degree. I look at the sink, still full of suds from washing the dishes. I trace a heart in the bubbles and then without even thinking about it, I draw a jagged line right down the middle. I hear a horse whinny from upstairs and then the sounds of a princess with a very strong New York accent talking about her knight in shining armour. I listen as my mother and Sulli discuss their strategy for Valentine's Day. I smile as I wash the bubbles down the drain. Things are good. Not great. Not perfect, but good.

author's note. 

I've been on an EXO hunger strike for the past 6 days now. No EXO or anything until I get an official statement from SM on what the freak is going on right now; and how's it going on on kreases side. To me OT12 stays OT12. 11 doesn't exist in my numerical dictionary and never will be. EXO, saranghaja!

#WebelieveinKris