Ravi hadn't said much to N in days. Anytime he tried to greet the older boy, he managed to slip into his room. Even Hongbin could see that something was wrong with their leader. But instead of moping around, N pretended to be extremely happy when the VIXX members were all together. Ravi couldn't imagine what could be bothering him. He seemed fine just a week ago. 

Ravi sighed while changing the channel, searching for something amusing to watch. Maybe it was for the best that N didn't seem to want to speak to him. Even though it was like slap in the face each time he turned his back on Ravi, he felt that it saved him from doing something stupid. Still though, sometimes N would give Ravi looks that haunted him in his sleep. Am I doing something wrong? Ravi thought, as he absently munched on potato chips.

"Ravi~!" Hongbin sang as he strolled into the living room.

"What?" The sharp tone in Ravi's voice wasn't directed at Hongbin. He just couldn't help but get irritated whenever he thought of N's strange behavior. Hongbin seemed to pick up on his mood.

"It's June," he said simply.

"So?"

"N hyung's birthday is in a few days." Hongbin took a seat next to Ravi on the plush couch. He stole of chip and earned a glare from Ravi. Instead of apologizing he smiled, showing off his cute dimples. "Hyuk and I were thinking of throwing a party. N always does nice things for us on our birthdays."

Ravi groaned. "I completely forgot. The 30^th..."

Hongbin tried to stop the disappointment from showing on his face. Ravi had been so distracted lately. It seemed as though all he wanted to do was escape the dorm. Escape and hang out with a girl. "Did you already make plans?" he asked.

"Kind of. But I guess it's nothing that I can't cancel." Ravi hesitated for a second, studying Hongbin's expression before continuing. "I get the feeling that N doesn't really want to see me. Maybe I should just— I don't know— back off?"

Hongbin didn't answer for a while. The only sound in the room was coming from a comedy show that played quietly on the TV. Already Ravi regretted saying anything. He didn't want to cause any problems for his fellow members. And he definitely didn't want to drag Hongbin into whatever conflict him and N were having. He could figure it out on his own. Or better, he should just leave it. Maybe N was upset about something that had happened that didn't involve Ravi.

"Forget I said that," Ravi finally murmured. He was about to get up from the couch when Hongbin grabbed his wrist.

"For whatever reason... I don't think N hyung is doing very well. He'd probably feel worse if you weren't there on his birthday. You two are close, right?"

Ravi didn't speak, only nodded then headed to his room. He knew the younger boy was right and that he should be there for N. But why was it so difficult? Everytime he met eyes with N, he somehow felt guilty. For what he didn't know. Ravi flopped face first onto his futon. He groaned, flailing his arms as if that could solve his problems. He was unbelievably tired from staying out the night before. But even though Ravi was exhausted, he knew he would meet Nicole* if she were to ask him out again.

As if on cue, Ravi's phone buzzed in his pocket. It was Nicole of course. Ravi hesitated, not sure if he should answer. After a second of thought, he decided to speak to her. "Hello?" His voice was thick as though he'd been sleeping.

"Hey!" Her voice was more cheery than usual. "I had a lot of fun last night. I thought I'd call you since you seemed pretty spent."

He only laughed as a response.

"So I was thinking..."

"Are you asking me out again, Noona?" Ravi teased. She was more into parties and events than he had originally assumed. Anytime Nicole received an invitation for something, she would drag him along.

She giggled. "Only if you're willing to meet me."

"Where?"

"Pick me up at my dorm." Loud rustling could be heard behind Nicole's voice. There was also music and muffled shouts of excitement.

"And may I ask where we're going?"

"Secret!" Nicole shouted over the noise. "I have to go now! Performance time—" The phone hung up. Ravi chuckled before dropping his cell on the blankets. You didn't tell me what time, he thought to himself. Suddenly N's face came to mind. I might as well just go out on the 30^th. It's not like he'll be missing me anyway. N had Leo to amuse himself with. He seemed to be clinging to him enough lately. With a grunt of annoyance, Ravi turned to his side. And just like that sleep crept into his tired mind.

xxx

"Hyung!" There was an enormous drop of weight on Ravi's stomach. He gasped, trying to sit up. When his eyes focused he noted Hyuk perched on his abs. Hyuk cackled at the look on Ravi's face before standing up. "You've been asleep all day, you know. It's already dinner time. N told me to wake you up."

"Why didn't he do it himself?" Was N that seriously about avoiding him? Ravi was clearly irked, but Hyuk didn't seem to notice. He shrugged indifferently before hurrying out of the room. Crap. The date with Nicole! Ravi struggled to find his phone in the blankets. He had two missed calls and an angry text that read: Where are you, jerk?!

Ravi hopped out of his futon and threw on a nice snapback. Nicole would probably kill him if he didn't show up in five minutes. He knew he wouldn't have time to eat. Hopefully there was food wherever they were going. After making sure his clothes were neat and y, he walked out of his room. Instantly he collided with N, who let out a quick squeak of surprise. Ravi was surprised as well and couldn't think of what to say.

N spoke first. "Manager hyung ordered chicken." He kept his eyes down as he spoke. Ravi wanted so badly to take his chin and force their eyes to meet. But he knew there would only be trouble if he did.

"I can't eat it," Ravi replied awkwardly. "I have to go out and I'm already late." N looked a bit stunned, which confused him endlessly.

"Again?" N's voice was nothing but a whisper, yet Leo seemed to hear him from the kitchen. He watched them quietly.

Ravi scratched underneath his hat. "Yeah... But I won't be out every night. And I promise I'll always be here for practice." Ravi could see the conflict in N's eyes. It were as though the older boy were searching desperately for a way to respond.

"Okay," he said lamely, stepping aside. He didn't look at Ravi as he shuffled past Leo and into the kitchen. Leo looked at Ravi then with intense concentration.

"What?"

Leo, of course, didn't say anything back. He only looked at him harder then followed their leader.

xxx

"You're late!" Nicole complained, smacking Ravi hard on the shoulder. She looked stunning as usual. Her black hair seemed to shine like silver in the moonlight. Though she wore no makeup on her lips, they were a pleasant light pink. Nicole always wore things that subtly complemented her figure. Tonight she wore a fitted dusty rose colored dress that seemed to bring out the blush on her cheeks.

"Sorry, Noona. I fell asleep." He responded sheepishly, earning another slap.

"I got dressed up and everything."

"To be fair, you didn't tell me where we were going," Ravi laughed. He knew she would forgive him. He seemed to be a soft spot of her's. Nicole quickly grabbed Ravi's hand, giving it a little squeeze.

"Honestly, I don't know where to go. I just wanted to see you." She smiled up at him and he felt that familiar sickness in his stomach. He ignored it however, smiling back at her. Ravi, for whatever reason, wanted things to work with Nicole. He felt that if it did, all of his uneasiness would disappear. But he didn't have much experience in dating. He spent his trainee years truly focusing on his rapping talent. Only recently did he feel like he needed someone to fill a void deep within himself.

"Are we still on for the 30^th?" Nicole asked, hope lining her voice. Ravi felt himself freeze. He'd been hoping they could avoid that subject. He stalled for a chance to collect his thoughts by leaning against the bench outside the dorm. Nicole's sharp eyes were hot on his face. She seemed to sense that something was wrong.

"I think so...?" Ravi hadn't meant to say it like a question, but he was still undecided. He didn't want things to be awkward between him and N anymore. And the only way he could think of to fix that way to give him space. Ravi was used to his immature hyung clinging on to him, spouting nonsense loudly. He didn't recognize the alien slinking around in their dorm. Even Ken seemed to be sensitive to the situation and he never payed attention to anything. Ravi just couldn't let go of the nagging feeling that it was his fault that N had become this way.

"How come you never try to kiss me?" Nicole quizzed, snapping Ravi out of his thoughts. He was baffled and could only reply with a weird bubbling sound. She didn't laugh. "Why?" He stared at the ground as if it could offer him an answer.

"I don't know," he finally said. He truly didn't. It wasn't that he didn't find her attractive. She was very beautiful— everyone knew that. And Ravi liked her a lot. He felt comfortable around her, like he could tell her anything without fear of being judged. Ravi knew she was a good girl. And any guy would be an idiot to let her slip through their fingers. So why hadn't he made a move?

"Well," She turned so that they stood face to face. There was hardly any nervousness in her eyes. They only twinkled under the light of the stars. "Why don't you now?"

"I don't know if I can have a real relationship right now... I mean, we're idols. I'm a part of VIXX—"

Nicole cut Ravi off by stretching to her toes and pressing her lips against his. They were soft as he'd imagined, but carried the weight of danger.

*I used Nicole from Kara for the girl character. I know absolutely nothing about her and only picked her because their ages are similar. Please understand XD

A/N: Ooooooh hello there again VIXX lovers~ I'm back with a new chapter! And it's longer this time haha. Future chapters will hopefully be even longer. Thank you SO much to the ppl who commented on the last chapter. It gave me a lot of confidence :D

Anyone feel free to comment!!

Until next time~